Spyke
lemmy.world

I would just ask my brother to give me $40. I think he would probably do that to avoid exploding.

89
lemmy.world

You can answer SIX whole emails in three hours?

damn that's like a full day for me.

36

That usually a month for me. I don’t respond unless it’s something important.

8

Right? 3 hours is $288. Any other families that need not exploding?

5

$33 an hour is a lot? I'm not up on the dick sucking market, but that seems like a good deal.

3
lemmy.world

40 dollars? That's all? I'm salaried and can work any hours I want to, so I guess I'm logging in at work and writing a few lines of code or answering some emails.

Twenty minutes will do it. Probably round it up to half an hour just to be safe. And honestly, if I get into the zone, an hour will fly by, easy.

24

Twenty minutes will do it. Probably round it up to half an hour just to be safe. And honestly, if I get into the zone, an hour will fly by, easy.

Sorry family. I got into the flow at work. Oops about that.

2

Sell my shirt to my dad for $40. I’m pretty sure he’d rather buy my shirt than explode.

24

Go to work for an hour

Take my bottles to the depot

Ask a buddy to spot me 40

Sell a couple things

… check my bank account?

$40 isn’t that much money…

19
lemmy.world

So $13.33/h?

That's less than £10 which I believe would be below minimum wage in my country, so basically any job would do it

16
Humaniusreply
lemmy.world

Assuming you get your paycheck either weekly or monthly, you won't have $40 after 3 hours through, even if you did $40 worth of work.

15
Macreply
mander.xyz

make $40

Doesn't say you have to acquire it personally.

10
lemmy.world

what about "make" as in "create"

everyone's family explodes in this thread

6

Good old-fashioned robbery. Then when charged argue a defense of necessity.

To make such a defense, you have to show that the harm you sought to avoid exceeds the harmed caused by the crime you admit to performing. Robbing $40 from a random store obviously meets this threshold if the alternative is multiple people dying.

There are many cases where you can't argue a defense of necessity. For example, if someone threatens to kill your family unless you kill some other person, you can't argue a defense of necessity at your murder trial. You can't sacrifice one life to save another. But if the crime you commit is obviously orders of magnitude less destructive than the alternative? Then yes, simply robbing a store for $40 to prevent multiple deaths could easily be argued as a necessity.

Hell, even if you're not able to make that defense; it's 40 bucks. What are the odds I'll face anything other than probation for such a minor crime?

It's the obvious answer, but sometimes the simplest answers are best. If I simply have to make 40 dollars within the next 3 hours, or people die? Yeah I'm just straight-up robbing somewhere.

14

Depends how you define "make"

If standard pay from job is too late, then I'd sell a CSP or CC from my brokerage account and I technically "made" the premium

If that's not urgent enough, take some jewelry to a pawn shop and hock it

11

Even if I didn't make that at my normal job, or it was non-business hours when I can't just go to work for money, I feel like $40 in 3 hours is pretty doable with just gig work (grocery/restaurant delivery, Uber).

3

I scroll on my phone for a bit and call it a day.

7
lemmy.sdf.org

Time to get into sex work.

I don't have anything I could sell that quickly, even.

7
andros_rexreply
lemmy.world

Overestimating how easy it is. Even before FOSTA-SESTA, you’d have to learn the lingo and figure out where your audience is. If you’re a cis dude, there’s a lot of cis dudes willing to suck or whatever for free. There’s also like literally nothing stopping them from not paying you - obviously you should take the money up front, but you go through all that effort, meet the guy and he says “oh I actually don’t have any money but don’t you like me enough to do it for free? 🥺” and in the best case scenario you just don’t get raped.

If they could pick up the desperation (and you’re desperate because of the exploding family thing), they’d probably pressure you into not making them wear a condom.

1

FOSTA-SESTA

Not American, no worries. We ultimately went with the Scandinavian model here so it's not even illegal to sell.

you’d have to learn the lingo and figure out where your audience is

That could be tough. I'd probably try some of the dudes that have already hit on me first.

$40 isn't too much and maybe I could play up the inexperienced actually straight fetish thing.

If they could pick up the desperation (and you’re desperate because of the exploding family thing), they’d probably pressure you into not making them wear a condom.

Not a deal breaker, TBH. Worst case I get AIDS and have to take pills for it for the rest of my life. My next best option in such a short period is an armed robbery I'll definitely get caught for. Maybe burglary if I can find someone who keeps cash.

1
jobbiesreply
lemmy.zip

Well a beej is a beej. Some people ain't picky.

1

How exactly do you define making money though? I already have more than $40 could I purchase a product worth more than $40 and then return it? Could I steal $40 from somebody and then give it back once my family is no longer going to explode? Could I explain that my family is going to explode and politely request the money in hopes that someone believes me? How long do I need to retain the money? What if I just take something I own to a pawn shop? What if I gamble and I lose $50 and then later I make $40, I'm $10 down but technically I made $40 in the last transaction, have I satisfied the requirement?

6

I feel like this is a "straight" boys wet dream. Perfect 'no homo' excuse to suck a dick.

"I did it to save my family".

5

Sell my car to the next person who walks by, I guess.

But I'll hint to them (family) strongly that I won't be selling two cars, so they need to get less explodey.

5

Rob a mcdonalds, only take $40. Explain myself after and pay it back.

4

Tell my family they have a new problem to deal with.

Maybe walk down to the pier and play a guitar with an open case. I could probably get more than $40 from scrap copper. I could maybe talk a used car lot into letting me clear some headlights for twice that much. Hawking some expensive junk on Craig's list might also work. Pawn some tools.

4

Grab all the canned stuff I made at home, and either just ask my mother to buy all them for 40 (a family member can pay me, right?) or convince the family friend who loves the candied jalapeños to buy them.

3

Easy. Sell a gun on FB Marketplace for a ridiculously low asking price. It would sell faster than I would be banned.

3

Get a loan from the local loan shark.

Go to the roulette table at the casino. Bet it all on 32.

Lose my bet.

Go back to the local loan shark for $40.

Bet the $40 at the roulette table.

Lose.

Repeat until either I get the money to pay the loan shark and save my family. Or I gues it's RIP for my family and my kneecaps.

2

That's possible at most jobs here, so family is safe. If you mean outside of work, I'm a lady so could probably find & turn a trick in that amount of time, sure husband would even set it up rather than exploding, he has a friend who works with rich guys. Could make that with plenty to spare, I'd guess.

1

Sell some stocks I guess.

Unless you mean my net worth has to go up $40? In which case, I'll probably look for someone who would be willing to pay me $40 ahead of time to teach them some machine learning over some negotiable span of time. Or to build a website or something. There are lots of businesses in the area that could use it, and $40 is insanely cheap for something like that.

1

Define family first

    • Parents - nothing
    • Siblings - nothing
    • Uncle's/aunts - nothing
    • Cousins - nothing
    • Grandparents - Uber
    • GFs - Uber
1