Spyke
lemmy.ca

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.

107

The trick is to press the button just as you start talking. With good timing, you can get stuck in the speaking animation long enough to make it through the fadeout and cutscene. Your character should then emerge unscathed on the other side of the barrier.

27
tetris11reply
lemmy.ml

Stone me a stripper, I'll be back for Ramadan

5

Poke me a ripper, I'll be back for midsummer.

2
sp3ctr4lreply
lemmy.dbzer0.com

I honestly don't understand how there isn't some kind of Waterworld... either action/fps mmo, ala destiny or warframe... or just some kind of mount and blade type single player game, or even Conan Exiles.

The closest thing I can even think of is Raft - Stranded Deep.

... Its mad max... on the ocean, and is basically postapoc/dieselpunk.

Bang wow zoom, fairly novel game (by modern standards) for a AAA or even AA studio to try.

8
lemmy.world

I would get nervous, fuck it up. Then try to save it; making it more cringe. Then detonate the bomb just to end the awkwardness.

45
tetris11reply
lemmy.ml

"Remember me as... as a guy... but like a really humble guy.... because even though what I'm doing is great and makes me better than you... I am not...."

9

... Sorry, you failed your perception check as well.

As you pull out the 'bomb'...

You are startled to discover it is actually two ramen noodle packs, each of which has slightly torn packaging, out of which a bit of crumbled dehydrated noodle bits leak.

2

I wasn't expecting to be sad in this thread but there it is. "I am the very model of a scientist Salarian..."

16
lemm.ee

"As a language model, I'm unable to produce a badass quote."

30

LEEEEEEEROOOOOOOOOOOOOYYYY JEEEEEEEENKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSS!

28

Hell yeah, classy! Especially if you hit the button on that last up note.

2

"OOOH! What does this button dooo!?"

If I have a companion, they are obligated to shout "DEEDEE, NOOOOO!"

My name isn't Deedee, but those who get it will get it.

If that isn't acceptable, then watch Space Ghost: Coast to Coast, pick a random quote that you feel is appropriate, and just go with it!

Otherwise, "OXFORD COMMAS FOR LIFE!"

17
lemmy.world

"Damn. This is gonna be the coolest thing I've ever done, and I'm not gonna get to see it."

alternately, go classical if you can summon up the appropriate amount of rage... "To the last I grapple with thee! From hell’s heart I stab at thee, for hate’s sake I spit my last breath at thee!"

16
lemmy.sdf.org

There's no way I'd waste that moment on something serious.

"Skibidi", which would be funny because I'm not that young.

10

With a gentle half-smile: Honestly? It was a blast.

10

"Pizza's done"

It isn't like the enemy is going to be alive to ponder whatever I say and whoever recounts the tale will make up something more memorable anyway.

9
lemm.ee

Death is light as a feather

Duty heavy as a mountain

8
lemmy.ca

Okay, I know this is a really bad idea but I'm already here so Here we fucking go... RAWR!!

x3 nuzzles! pounces on you uwu you so warm Couldn’t help but notice your buldge from across the floor Nuzzles yo' necky wecky-tilda murr-tilda hehe Unzips yo baggy ass pants, oof baby you so musky Take me home, pet me, 'n’ make me yours and don't forget to stuff me! See me wag my widdle baby tail all for your buldgy-wuldgy! Kissies 'n' lickies yo neck I hope daddy likies Nuzzles 'n' wuzzles yo chest (yuh) I be (yeah) gettin' thirsty

Hey, I got a little itch, you think you can help me? Only seven inches long uwu PLEASE ADOPT ME Paws on your buldge as I lick my lips (uwu punish me please) 'Boutta hit ’em with this furry shit (he don’t see it comin')

8

I did a quick search and was shocked to find zero hits to

"Superman".

8
Dadiferreply
lemmy.world

To give the Covenant back their bomb.

Goosebumps

8

Looking at the enemy: Tell me if you heard this one. What did the Homo Sapiens say to the alien? Detonates the bomb

7

"And when I get to Heaven,
To St Peter I will tell;
Quarter pounder cheese and a big mac please,
And a side of fries as well."

7

Jesus idk how you did it but I read the entire thing in Mindy’s voice from the first letter.

It’s like my mind knew

3

There's so many good stories where some brave hero has to give their life to save the day, and because of their sacrifice, the good guys win, the survivors cheer, and everyone lives happily ever after. But the hero never gets to see the ending. They'll never know if their sacrifice actually made a difference. They'll never know if the day was really saved. In the end, they just have to have faith.

Ain’t that a bitch?

5

Do you have clean underwear on, punk? Your momma warned you about today.

(I'm not very good at this)

5
superkretreply
feddit.org

This is so insane when you think about it.
You're in hospital, and your mom is really worrying about your dirty underwear?

3

She's not. She's just using that argument to not speak the truth: That it's disgusting to not keep yourself clean and she's ashamed of your (probably) poop stained underwear.

Teenagers truly can be disgusting. It's hard to tell them though. Even harder is, when this applies to grown ups.

Growing up means to realise that even the hurtful thing's people said to you, where probably just said because they care for you. (Not everyone cares obviously) Parents live their first life too.

2

We’re all worse off because of “chicken jockey”… everyone… even mentioning it makes the world dumber…

It’s the soulless void in every person that snapped onto chicken jockey like a magnet or some “thing” with no reason to do different or better../

2

I don't do this to save them, I do this to release you from your wretched vows and commit your memory to the eternal flames. may we both burn brightly in hell.

in a less serious tone

Hey, Listen!

4

It would be feeble but something like "It's time to fix this mistakes!".

4

Is it the green wire or the red wire? Oopsie!

I know what you're thinking. Did he 'splode six bombs or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being as this is a Tsar Bomba AN602, the most powerful bomb in the world, and would blow your nuts clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya, punk?”

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Except for muscle wasting diseases. But this, this'll definitely kill you.

Revenge is a dish best served cold and I'm coming for you like a bowl of gazpacho soup!

I’m your huckleberry pie.

3

Let me sit on this and watch what happens when it hatches

2