Spyke
awful.systems

Obviously next to House. He wants his seat neighbors to stfu and let him sleep. I want the same. It's perfect.

150
lemmy.world

Five minutes into the flight, he's going to have this really nervous, embraced look on his face. Ten minutes in, he's going to be fidgeting and kinda trying to catch your attention. Fifteen minutes in, he's going to give you the most exasperated sigh and announce "It's lupus. You've got lupus. You need to begin treatment as soon as we land."

77
Lumidaubreply
feddit.org

I'm unclear whether that's supposed to be a deterrent from sitting there.

30
aussie.zone

The issue is that they didn’t have lupus before sitting next to House. The universe just couldn’t let House go 15 minutes without a diagnosis.

16

"He'll diagnose you with something!"

Healthy people: oh fuck!

Chronically ill people: fuck yes!

12

Problem is that you're still pretty close to Butt-Head (I assume Muscle Man is polite enough to be reasonably quiet). Granted you get an aisle seat so you can occasionally "go to the bathroom" to get some peace and quiet (edit: and House might be willing to slip Beavis and Butt-Head, the former especially, some Vicodin for you because he also wants them to shut up.)

Then again, sitting in or near the very back might save your life with Beavis and Butt-Head aboard. (edit 2: Forgot this wouldn't be possible after 9/11.)

8

Here comes Charlie giving some really long monotone verbose speech about airplane food and how it sucks

1
lemmy.world

The presence of Kazuma and Aqua guarantee that there will be no peace on this flight no matter where one is seated.

70
sik0fewlreply
piefed.ca

And Aqua is pretty small (more shoulder room) and 10 is an aisle seat, might as well 🤷‍♂️.

20
cannedtunareply
lemmy.world

Plus they’ve probably got alcohol to share, so sitting in 10. Guaranteed not to be bored.

13

Worst case you can swap seats with Jay so that you can talk to Kevin Smith while the both of you watch him hit on her.

2
redsandreply
infosec.pub

Which is why I'm taking that seat and doing arts and crafts with Aqua. The stoners across the isle will help if the movie sucks.

lol our row is going to empty the drink cart 😂

7
The_Lurkerreply
lemmy.world

Silent Bob and Kazuma will just chill while Aqua and Jay will try to get high/drunk or something else in the restroom and end up causing the plane to have an emergency landing.

5

The safety of the flight depends on my ability to keep them distracted 🫡 Dabs, Kazuma first in case we need Aqua's rez

2
lemmus.org

1 easy choice. Those two have stories for days. Normally I don't want to be bothered but that would be interesting enough to be fun.

36

Exactly. You get a moment to share with some of the craziest people, you take it. Also, they'll probably buy you a drink.

14

Hugh Laurie is an accomplished blues and jazz musician i would not miss that chance to get ignored by someone that fancy

13
baltakateireply
sopuli.xyz

The pink-haired one is kind albeït a bit slow. The white-haired one is probably smuggling contraband and is not afraid to trample you in an emergency. Beating up Beavis for snickering at their horse ears constitutes an emergency.

17

Those horses aren't as fuckable as the ones on the plane.

::: spoiler spoiler I did not say 'not fuckable' :::

4

Five, swap seats with Silent Bob, throw on headphones, hope Beavis and Butthead don't crash the plane

8

Idk man, sitting in front of Fred Durst assaulting a cat girl would kinda freak me out.

3
lemmy.ca

My man, I can't grow up on Kevin Smith films and miss the opportunity to sit between him and Jason Mewes. Are we kidding?

15
texturereply
lemmy.world

kevins films are nice and all, but does he ever have anything of value to actually say?

6

He can tell you more about Superman vs Giant Spider. And probably a gajillion other interesting stories about Hollywood eccentrics.

6

Judging by his more recent films, Kevin Smith has a great deal to say about how much he loves Kevin Smith movies.

4
tetris11reply
feddit.uk

I'm just worried there might be a typo on my ticket and he decides to enact the law

3
texturereply
lemmy.world

if thats a referential joke, sadly im without the wisdom to enjoy it

3
lemmy.world

Are you kidding me? Jay won't ever shut the hell up, so he'll be talking to you the whole flight about shit

Might get a good buzz, or at least a plug which can be useful.

9
waggzreply
programming.dev

even if your consider that it's the actors and not the characters it would still be non stop talking from Kevin. which I'm fine with either it's still definitely my pick here.

1

Oh, if we're talking actors, absolutely. I just don't think I could take a whole flight listening the Jay blather endlessly. It would be funny for a while, but it gets old after a bit.

1
oppy1984reply
lemdro.id

Lemmy was the founder and only constant member of the band Motorhead. He was Motorhead, he played rock and roll.

Also seems we're in the same boat, I have no idea who bbno$ is.

2

bbno$ is a rapper (arguably used to be a meme rapper) who's made a ton of songs that blew up on TikTok. You've probably heard some of his songs without knowing it just because of how pervasive tiktok music is in society

1

Interesting, I've never heard of him. But then again I'm in my 40's, single and no kids, never had a tiktok account, and mostly consume self-hosted media. Some of the locally owned stores I shop at play some....interesting..... house music, so maybe I have heard his music and just don't know it.

2

This is like when I hang out with older friends and their kids, I know both and they're great in very different ways lol

2

What the fuck? How have I not heard of a place like that? I think I’ll blindly fail for hours to find a way to join, and end up on the most basic sounding and highly toxic one and not have it in me to make more accounts.

2

5

Endless entertainment, whether they're in character or not.

11

fuck it, 7, at least by the end i'll know i have no illness mysterious enough to warrant his attention

11

7 no question Hugh and I are leading the whole plane in Minnie the Moocher the whole flight.

HO DI HO DI HO DI HO

10

House and CJ, thanks. Both of them basically just want to chill. But frankly with the way that plane is going to be, I'd leave the airport and take a train or a bus.

10

I'm sitting next to house because if I don't bother him he'll probably pop a couple vicoden and take a shot and sleep

10

definitely 7. idk who the person in front is, but I'm SURE Dr. House would be so entertaining to sit next to and Charlie is literally the best possible person to sit behind me.

9

4 4 4 4 4 4 4 please oh god 4 4 4 please. Best cat boi. 9 is also fine because bbno$ is really chill.

9

I'm guessing it would be with their characters, so they probably smuggled weed into the plane and will be involved in various other capers. But still, looks like the best choice.

4

Jay would be turned around in his seat macking on the waifus.

'So, are you, like, 18 in horse years, or what?'

8

5 if you want interesting.

7 if you want an angry doctor to insult you and ignore you for the remainder of the flight while he sleeps after a couple vicodin. No idea who the other guy is, but it could get interesting if he has to take a piss.

8

Oh fucking hell, could you imagine house on this plane? Esp with ASH behind him?

2
fedia.io
  1. Lemmy was by all accounts a genuinely great guy. (I know, this the shitposting community)
7
lemmy.zip

1 or 9. I love both Ozzy's and Lemmy's music too much to pass it up.

6
lemmy.today

Never met Ozzy, but had a shot with Lemmy after a set by his side project Hedcat. For a god he was humble and a chill dude to shoot the shit with. No fucking clue who the other dude in 9 is but hopefully he like Jack Daniel’s.

3

Bbno$. Not too familiar with his music, but he sounds pretty chill.

And yeah, sounds about like what I've heard of Lemmy. Shame I'll never get to hear him live.

2
Jo4tedreply
lemmy.zip

They both still have crazy life stories, maybe some advice as well.

2
texturereply
lemmy.world

please do not take advice on any topic from mr osbourne

5
Denjinreply
feddit.uk

They're both dead, so probably not any more.

2

BBNO$ is probably chill tho. I'm not completely dead in the water.

3
LwL
lemmy.world

4 seems chill, unless whoever the window seat is changes that. There's also a morbid curiosity to the result of sitting in 6, it might just be entertaining enough to be worth it.

6
reddthat.com

Of all of the musicians I'd assume are super pleasant to interact with in public Fred Durst is not one of them, but honestly I'm happy to hear that

4

1 if ozzy is alive.

2 is ok, brewstew might have some stories worth hearing.

3 might go well, would probably go very wrong.

  1. I don't know what Ferris did to have to sit next to durst.

  2. Hell yes, just to talk shop with Smith and Mewes.

  3. Haven't watched Pretty Derby, prob not for me

  4. House and GTA, hell yes

  5. Don't watch Cr1tiKal, and I think ash would be annoying, but petting his pokemon might be fun

  6. If lemmy was alive, maybe, don't know anything about bbno$

  7. Don't watch konosuba

6
lemmy.today

7, 4, or 10.

I'm all about the aisle seat, know I don't have lupus, and generally do not give of the vibe that I will talk to anyone at any time. Happy to get up when you need, and love to be hydrated.

And whatever the character is next to 2 looks... ripe.

6

Ngl idk who a lot of these people are.

I'ma say 5 because although Jay (the character) never shuts up, they're both really nice guys trying to do right by folks.

Bbno$ also seems chill af

5

7 because I need more mouse bites

backup plan of 2, brewstew would probably provide some good in flight entertainment, and sitting next to muscle man could be Alright

5

Those boys in row three remind me of those guys I caught whackin' it in my tool shed... but what are the odds?

5

I'm torn between 4 and 6,

For 4, while the person behind me will probably be a nuisance, I am in line of of sight for House to diagnose whatever nightmare disease I have. (2 might be better for line of sight, but that requires house turning his head all the way)

6 is a much more comfortable location and hopefully my nightmare disease can be diagnosed audibly, like a cough or something

I thought about 7, but the person next to house being sick doesn't make for great TV, so...

5

7 either neither of them are talking to me or I get to watch CJ and Doctor house bicker. Regardless it shall be entertaining. Alternatively 10 for similar reasons.

4
lemmy.world

3 is probably the worst seat. Sitting in front of muscleman would be THE WORST

4

You'd think so, but all you'd have to do is tell them where Ozzy is sitting and they'd go pester him instead.

1
lemmy.ca

Honestly number 1 seems fine. They’d probably just listen to their podcasts and sleep.

4

Plus you get a window seat.

tbh, I don't know who most of those people are. I'm just going by "yay, window seat"

5
bstixreply
feddit.dk

Knoxville is going to punch your balls any chance he gets.

1

We’re not close enough friends for that. He’s not gonna just assault a stranger on a plane. If I were Steve-O though he’d crank me one.

1
solidheronreply
sh.itjust.works

I interpreted it as Felix was gonna get groped and you're right there watching

2

I have a hard time deciding between 1, 5 and 7.

  1. I think Ozzy was super chill, so that's a plus.
  2. Jake may be annoying but it's worth it if I can mooch an edible.
  3. House could be interesting to talk to but maybe also a jerk, or even better Hugh Laurie would be a blast talking to.
3

Disappointed that it's not Carson Daly next to Fred Durst.

3

I dont like any of these people... :/

Guess I would sit in the toilet.

2

7, if house is awake he is probably more interested in the biology of living anime characters in front of us. If I do draw his attention somehow, I probably have some health condition I want to know about.

2

There are at least 2 dead people on the plane. I think I'd wait for another flight...

2

I'd probably try because I'm strong-headed like that but halfway through I'd just walk out.

2

I'd say 10 that was I get to be as close to the corpse as possible from the corpse. I'd ask goddess to show her water tricks

1

This flight is already going to smell awful, but I'd imagine that 2, 9, & 10 will have the strongest smells.

1