Have you ever been rejected just because of your height?
I've seen people consider even 5'7" as short for some reason so i'm curious if it has happened with someone
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I've seen people consider even 5'7" as short for some reason so i'm curious if it has happened with someone
I'm guessing you're a man ?
I'm 5'4 male and average looking and a bit chubby
Dude, if you have decent hygiene, are a basic human being and treat people with respect, you will rise above all the other men who are stupid, racist, sexist, entitled pieces of shit
The bar is set REALLY low
Really Really low
Also if someone rejects you for your height consider he/she is doing you a favor by signaling he/she is not mature / has fucked up priorities for a relationship
This absolutely. I'm a 5'1" lady, and I do like my partner to be taller than me, but basically everyone is taller than me.
If you lined up every man I've dated over my lifetime, you'd see men from 5'2" to 6'4".
The right people are there for the person, not shallow bullshit. Hygiene is the best indicator, yes. Good hygiene, nice person, you'll find success.
When my now husband told me he was 6'3" my jaw dropped. Sure I was happy (he can reach the top shelf for me) but I seriously wouldn't have batted an eye if he was shorter
Date kind people, not shallow cunts and you should be okay.
I dated one guy who told me he was 5'10". He was kind of a cunt. He was actually 5'7". It just showcased his insecurity. I didn't like that. Wear yourself with pride. No one choses to be short/tall. Accept yourself and others will too.
There's a saying "the bar for men is in hell"
I thought it meant there was a drinking establishment for men in hell. They go and drink with the devil, and that's where they get all their bad ideas. They're doing shots and the devil's like "say she's fat", and the guy is like "good advice bro".
Turns out the saying just means the bar is super low. So low you don't even have to jump. It's so low, it's deeper than the depths of the earth and in the fires of hell that burn below.
But yeah, so many men are so horrible, it's shockingly easy to rise above them.
How old are you, im curious if its a generational thing, like mid 20s women will straight up openly say theyd never date a man under a certain height openly in public lol
I'm ~40, so I don't date or spend much time with people in their 20s.
I have seen the occasional profile demanding a certain height, but I just skip on it immediately.
I wonder if it correlates with other attributes? I'm also very left wing so I don't interact with conservatives much, for example. Maybe "I need a tall man and I'll say it out loud" happens more there?
ive seen both political ends say it, some ppl are hung up on height for whatever reason
idk im thankful for my friends but ik its a bubble forsure, everyones divisive and shallow lately, woman especially, because modern woman, have infinite choice, you wont feel content, compared to modern average dude with minimal choices desperate to keep what they can get coming off desperate and insecure lol
People do get rejected for their height lol, ppl are shallow, all woman aren't saints, what you should be saying is you should avoid anyone that cares about height, theyll remove themselves and its a non issue, ive had girls attracted to me calling me 6 foot be less atteacted to me visibly when I corrected them and said im actually 5 10 no logic in it lol
People also get rejected for not being 300 lbs. Everyone has tastes.
I think the number of girls out there ACTUALLY rejecting people for height is not as many as you'd think. And good riddance.
I will say that this is some significant gaslighting. The bar is by no means "on the ground" if you are a guy - unless maybe your bar for women is also on the ground. Like, could you woo a grossly overweight, extremely insecure woman who works at Walmart and has no hobbies other than complaining about her more successful sister? Yeah, probably. But idk, I personally have standards in both the looks and personality department for women I want to date, and these are not some superficial "shallow" standards - they are standards without which I seriously have no interest whatsoever in spending time with or sleeping with a potential partner.
So the question is - where is the bar for the women you'd be interested in dating? Like, the cute, athletic, cheerful, intelligent, successful girls who usually don't break down in tears because they are out of orange juice. And the answer is - higher than you wish it was! Because every other guy also wants to date these women, and while some of those guys are shitty, a lot of them are also jacked, hilarious, kind, emotionally open, rich, and yes, tall! If you want to date these women, you have to work hard to make yourself stand out - getting in better shape, dressing in a way that looks good and expresses your personality, becoming more emotionally open and sociable, having an interesting and fun lifestyle, etc. And then you have to work hard again, because unless you are just an ungodly top shelf man, most women will still not want to date you for some reason, most of which are out of your control, so you will therefore have to shoot your shot with a lot of women until you find the ones who are into you.
Oh my God, YES!!!!! WOMEN LIKE TALL GUYS!!!! Obviously I don't mean all women, but a statistical sampling of women would reveal that "being tall" or "being taller than me" is a turn on for a significant majority of women. This doesn't mean short guys should take the black pill and give up on dating because all women are shallow bitches. But it does mean that dating will be harder if you are a short guy. This isn't a death knell for your dating life, but it does mean you will need to work harder at the things you do have control over, and it means you'll get rejected more often for a specific reason outside your control.
And meanwhile, these women who aren't into short guys aren't "immature", or "shallow". They are simply staring their preferences and/or requirements. Physical attraction is important, and trying to date someone you aren't physically attracted to is a bad way to start a relationship. After all, you probably wouldn't want to date a girl with a face that looks like she got run over by a semi truck. That's not fair, she can't control how her face looks, but also, fairness doesn't matter because you don't want to date her. Full stop. Terminal value. Life isn't fair, and it isn't up to some random person you run into to make it fair for you. That's a big case of not their problem.
To summarize: Dating is harder for shorter guys. This is no one's fault, and no one is being a bad person. Short guys just need to work harder. Sorry.
Lol ok I feel dumb after looking at the comments. I thought you meant like... On rollercoaster rides or something.
lol you and me both
Is that a problem I'm too tall to understand?
Being 205cm (6'9"), yeah what kinda problem is that? Now let me go tend to the bump on my head from running into a doorframe again
Fuck that, how expensive are your shoes?
it's fine I only have a 47 (13.5) so I can still buy them in regular stores. usually around 50€ if it is everyday wear1
I'm at 13 and have a hard time with availability in stores sometimes. I'm so glad they didn't get any bigger than that.
P.S. thanks for the translation.
You should check out the Dara o Briain comedy bit about buying size 13 shoes.
Once you know what brand you like, you can usually get them online pretty easily. That's what I do most of the time nowadays
13 too, I usually go with the Ecco brand. Last forever and the shops usually have a few models in stock that aren't Runners.
At a mere 6'5" over here, how do these examples make you feel?
Bus seat, airplane seat, powered car seat, Toyota RAV4.
rolls on the floor crying
Laughs in back and knee pain
Regularly throughout my life. I'm also 5'7". It seems to be less of an issue now that I'm older. People are going to like what they like. But people who limit their choices to strict deterministic traits tend to completely skip right over awesome people, and then they wonder why they're partners are so terrible.
So yeah, this shit is going to happen. You'll also get chosen for your height. Focus on improving those physical traits over which you have control.
Weird; I mean, I know it's anicdotal but I'm 5'6" and I've never had anyone so much as even mention my height (maybe when around other men when I was younger once or twice but the bulk of my friends have always been more women such that I don't truly remember).
I guess it doesn't really contribute to the thread but I was just genuinely surprised at such a difference of experience.
True as Hell, though.
My ex did tell me I'm shorter than she wants her bf to be. I was still talker than her by 2-3 inch but she wanted me taller than her in heels. And suggested I do exercises to get taller.
I ended it with her soon after that. I think if someone has thought like that, there are other common patterns that makes the relationship too much to worth it. My wife now is same height as me and we're happy about that, height difference of several inches seems weird/difficult to imagine now.
ive never Been rejected, (i dont ASK people out)
Same, I just awkwardly glance at them few times of I like them and hope they will ask me out. So far nobody asked me out.
That's the spirit!
Someone cracked the code i think
I (woman, 5'10") was dumped for being too tall.
Condolences my dude.
dudette, I think
Is dude not back to being gender neutral again? What are we going with?
now that you say, I'm not sure anymore
Can be agender, can be a gender.
Fuck dudes, hanging with the dudes, ".... Duude...", "sex with dudes"
Same with bro or man. Also, progressively, defaults shouldn't be masculine and people shouldn't push that narrative.
Like, "I like having sex with multiple dudes at the same time", but, also, my gf is not a dude, dude.
But ALSO to complicate things further, sometimes chicks ARE dudes or bros just because they want to be and that's okay. And the more you think about that sentence the more your brain will hurt.
I dunno. Just... Don't be a dickhead and respect people, and it's probably fine. "Gotta know the rules before you break the rules."
I think it might be dependent on context, unfortunately/confusingly.
Would you have sex with a dude? If yes then it's fine
That's one hell of a standard
Why? If dude is gender neutral, then you should be comfortable using the phrase "I'd have sex with that dude".
I'd say it's a expression that does have gender associations, but it's not offensive or anything to call a woman dude in the right context. If anything it is usually used as a gesture of camaraderie, in this case because a woman has suffered in a way that men can understand.
Rowing club coach at a university I was interested in told me I was too short to bother trying out but if I dropped all muscle to squeak under 120 lbs I could try for coxswain.
Jokes on them, rowing generally requires waking up before the ass crack of dawn which was not conducive to my preferred college experience. I found rugby, which has way broader allowance for body type and no sunrise torture sessions.
I am 5'4" and though no one has ever outright told me they rejected me because of it directly, it almost certainly is a leading reason I have fewer interested parties. It seems like most women specifically mention height in their requirements. It's too bad, I'd date a tall woman. Karlach is my favorite.
Being short helped me grow a personality and learn to be charismatic to overcome my height, and I've done okay, but it'd be foolish to say it's not a huge hurdle in dating.
I think they mention it to weed out the liars. Insecure dudes will show up 6" shorter than advertised. (And woman 100lbs. heavier.)
I did quite well at online dating and I think it's largely from having honest pics, and a wide variety of them, and having an amusing write up.
I was on a date once and when i opened my door, she stood there super excited and hugged me and said: omg, you're real, just like the pictures. And i just stood there awkwardly, thinking: man i wish i could say the same to you. Because she mysteriously gained twice her sice over night.
What made it even worse is that we planned to go on a hike with my dog, and as you could guess, she wasn't really equipped for long walks and started huffing while my house was still visible.
No. I have doubts that it actually happens except in extremely rare instances. I wonder if some women blame a lack of attraction on height because saying other things gets an ever worse reaction?
Possibly.
Not particularly tall but have had someone mention liking it. Mainly just kissing up.
It's not gonna really matter for someone who is into you.
I'd guess young women do this kind of thing more frequently than women whose prefrontal cortex is fully developed.
Some people put expectations on what they want, and then get confused where they can't find it. Live life with no expectations, and you're less likely to get disappointed.
Not to my face. But as someone else said, it's rare for you to be told the rejection reason (for early dating). There are a lot of reasons for this, but part of it is people kind of suck at taking rejection. And on top of that, a significant portion of men are dangerous.
No one wants to risk the man flipping out, spewing cruelty, or worse. A gentler letdown seems safer.
I lucked out into being born 5'10, not tall enough to need special clothes, but short enough so the shallow "6ft or nothing" women self filter themselves and I don't have to deal with them myself. I had a buddy who was 5'4ish who was an absolute disgusting human being but always blamed being alone on his height, also have a buddy who 5'2ish and married to an absolutely wonderful woman
RIP mom
I'm 5ft11 and I think I just get rejected for being myself rather than my height 🤷🏼♂️
Same, 5ft11 as well, I think we're both too tall and too short for people.
I can't ride the go karts at the nearby go kart track because I am too tall 😔
Flying and being tall is a nightmare.
Whoa what? Since when can tall people fly?
They keep letting me onto planes!
Somedays average is best.
same for skydiving.
Yes. Rejected to ride on the adult-sized go karts. Has to ride the kiddie bumper cars instead. But this was when I was younger.
I'm 5'8, plenty of men aren't interested in women as tall as they are.
Also 172/5'8 and same, several times! Even from me who were still taller than me! Also dated someone who didn't care and was 175/5'9 and when we went out together and my shoes made me taller than him, we'd get an average of like 10 comments, all from men, about it. Lots of friends have told me their only slightly taller ex bf wouldn't 'let' them wear heels.
Also, on a dating app, I'd get about 50/50 matches from masc and fem people when I didn't list my height. When I did list it, I'd get mostly fem ones, and all the masc ones were tall. And fewer matches overall.
yes! it's wild getting it from guys who are already taller than me. I'm lucky enough to have not had the experience of looking for a partner on dating apps(unless discord counts?), but i hear all the time about how absurdly superficial they are
About 10% of women will have a very strict type and reject you outright. If you were 2m tall this would maybe shrink to 9%, so it's irrelevant.
90% will think maybe you're a bit short but will overlook your height if you're above average in some other area of personality or looks.
My favorite height in a woman is the height of the woman who is interested in me.
I tell people I'm 4'23" and that sorts them out.
Reading the thread. Most of you guys are not THAT short lol. I actually married my guy who is 5'1". He has a nice smile, funny and smart.
He has told me unfortunately that he has often been declined often by women due to his height. We have asked our mutual friends who said they won't date someone who is that short which is unfortunate because they all love him too.
He's pretty confident, professional, so people from work finally meet him in person, they are surprised he is not taller.
Yes. I am 1,70 and got rejected for being too small. Well. It happens.
I'm too tall for that. But on a lot of dates i go, the woman tells me that she's glad i'm tall and then tell me a story how they went on a date with a short guy and how awkward that was.
This whole height thing is an artifact of dating apps.
Of course women are going to judge based on one of the 6 data points they have available. It's not that they're shallow by "nature".
Women will almost never confront a man face-to-face with the reason she rejects him because to do so is physically dangerous.
I saw a meme on reddit today that suggested that an obese woman could have all the partners she wanted and that only men suffered from being rejected because of their body and this incel shit is gotten out of hand.
EDIT: here is the meme: https://i.redd.it/yyp4m7axn25f1.jpeg
Do you think they realize that they made her look fun (smiling) and him look awful (scowling, wearing a school child backpack, bad haircut) ?
I was once rejected for being too tall. I'm 1.96m (~6'5") and she was ~ 1.65m (~5'5"), said that she didn't like the thought of having to crane her neck to see my face.
She helpfully also saved your back a little
Yes, he said he didn't like feeling like a kid next to me 🤷♀️
Yes, too tall. I'm 6ft without any kind of footwear. 🤷🏿♀️
No. I got married before online dating existed
Only two ladies didn't like my height lying down
HEYOOOOO
.... Out of two
HEEYYOOOOOO
bro, three
I'm a tiny bit shorter than 5'7" and yes, rejected multiple times because of it, but they don't always tell you why, so some of it is speculation. I've dated taller women a few times as well, so it's not that bad. My wife now is a lot shorter though, but I don't think height played much a role for us. If I were much taller we may even be incompatible.
I'm 6'2" and I dated a woman taller than me. That was very odd not having to look down or crouch to hug. lol
I dated one woman who was so much shorter compared to me our favorite time to kiss was on the stairs.
Long, somewhat related story:
Many moons ago I was at a club and was dying for a smoke, but you had to leave the club and go through two sets of lines and ID checks to get to where I was hanging out on the second floor. Well, they had a giant outdoor balcony, but the area was walled off by a line of plastic chairs. My drunk, fiendin, ass said, "fuck it", shuffled a chair out of the way, and snuck off to the corner to smoke. Well, what was one or two people who noticed me and did the same, soon turned into a packed balcony.
Regardless, my little act of rebellion seemed to get the attention of a "tallish" girl in heels who started chatting me up. About 3/4 through my smoke, the bouncers finally catch wind that there's fifty people on the balcony, and start angrily shuffling people back into the club. At this point, I ask the chick if she wants to dance, and she accepts.
Kudos to her for lasting as long as she did, but thirty seconds into grinding her ass on my stomach, she gave up trying to dance with me and walked away without a word, never to be seen again.
I wouldn't even consider myself short (1.78m, 5'10"), but it was a humbling moment at the time.
I'm a tall lady (for my area, though shortest of my siblings), about the average height of guys here, and yeah. Some guys have sounded very accusatory actually - as though I grew tall on purpose to make them feel short. Oddly enough, none of those were literally short guys.
No big deal, I like my height, shorter is not something I've ever wished to be. All 3 of my long term relationships have been with guys about my same height.
I'd consider myself to not care about if my partner was higher than me.
But if I am really honest with me, I do think it would hurt my pride if my partner was taller.
I am totally fine if equal or whatever else size. But I believe if the personality is near total hit and fits mine, I could totally see past that.
Yeah, most awkward job interview I have ever had
I was at a cast party with my s/o (she is in theatre) and all the women were chanting that only short kings were at the party (I'm 5'8) - that's the closest I've been to rejection lol.
5'7" IS short in some countries for males.
Edit: For example, average male height in the US is 5'9". Below average by 2 inches is fairly noticeable. Tom Cruise is 5'7". Everyone knows he's short. Is there anything wrong with that? No. I'm 6'4" and I assure you it's not all it's cracked up to be.
No but then women tend to get a pass for being short. I don't have much going for me so I feel the shortness lends me a bit of cuteness. I'm fun-sized!
Everyone is tall compared to me so it's kinda funny that I ended up with a guy who's actually tall to everyone else too (6'1).
Edit: 5'1
too many people based it on porn standards, 6'+ and 7-10inches long.
I'm a 5'7 woman. Yes, I've been rejected a couple times because I'm on the taller side.
Wait really? Are you straight? I'd be really surprised any guys would think 5'7 is too tall.
I am straight. Some men just enjoy shorter women.
Well, fwiw if a guy doesn't want to date you cause you're 5'7 you dodged a bullet. Same with the rest of these superficial "rules". like it's one thing to have a preference but idk why you would reject someone outright over something like that
I thought this thread was talking about applying for jobs and was so confused
Sorry, but you are to tall for this rollercoaster :/
It was used as an excuse once, they just liked someone else. I was ~5'10"
No, but I was rejected because I couldn't drive.
I don't think so, no, but I've definitely been rejected because they didn't think I was cute. The world has gone downhill ever since they let women pick their mates! 😤
Male, 5' 10" / ~1.78m.
For actual first dates, serious to semi serious, or a first genuine asking someone out on a date?
No, never been rejected on account of my height.
For... whole bunch of people at a bar or party, dancing, hitting on each other and looking to go home with someone?
... Maybe once or twice a chick I was into snubbed me for a taller guy?
I've managed to draw some away from taller dudes a few times as well, so... balances out?
...
Possibly worth mentioning that I think I've only ever dated one or two women the same height or even slightly taller than me...
As there are a portion of women who will reject a guy who is too short, I think that also works in reverse and there are a portion of men who will reject a gal because she's too tall.
Being thin will land you there.
Also fat...
I'm 5'6. Yeah. So much. I was rejected like crazy for my height in my teens and early twenties, but I lived in a particularly shitty part of the United States, so I'm not surprised in retrospect. I also dated a ton, so there was a lot of opportunity for rejection. I even remember a woman I was not interested in and had shown absolutely no interest in going out of her way to tell me she would date me if I wasn't so short.
I relocated to a much more progressive part of the country and it hasn't come up once in nearly a decade.
Edit: I should mention it was only an issue with women, I never heard anything about it from men.
There's generally no way to know.
I mean, 5'7" is quite short.
Not that I would wish it on anyone to be rejected because of their height, but we're all entitled to our sexual preferences, without the burden of justification. And this one seems incredibly reasonable, unless maybe you're in Asia where 5'7" is like top 1 percentile?
I would never date any man or woman below 5'10" because I prefer my partner to be taller than me. I generally consider anything less than 5'8" to be very short, and anyone over 6'0" to be tall.
5'7" isn't "quite short" because 5'7.5" is the global average height.
Global is the key word. In Denmark 5'7" is definitely short. In North Korea, that would be huge.
Denmark has an average Height of 181.6cm for males, and North Korea has an average of 165.6cm. The Global average height is 171 cm, leaving Denmark 10.6cm above average and North Korea is 5.4cm below the average, and a difference of 16cm between the average of the two populations.
This is not a "huge", or a "definitely short" kind of difference.
You don't think that's a significant difference in average height? Cuz that's a pretty big difference to me. Denmark's average being around 6' when most of the rest of us consider that tall is pretty significant
I literally just said that, so yes.
I am 193cm and my partner is about 35cm smaller than me. That is a significant difference in my opinion, while 16cm is not.
🙄
Average height where I am in the UK is 5'9" for men (175cm). I'm not dating in Asia so the global averages aren't really relevant.
Don't feel insecure though, it's just each to their own, and I hope you find someone awesome who loves you and is a good fit! (if you haven't already of course!)
I'm quite lucky because I found a girlfriend who is the same height as me. We're a really good fit together physically and much more importantly we're absolute soulmates, and in the end that's what matters.
And for what it's worth, before I met my gf when I was younger, I still went on a date with a trans bi dude who was like 5'3" or 5'6" or something because I found him super interesting. Didn't work out, and it was actually me getting turned down, so there's that, I didn't discard him as a choice just because of his height nor even the potential physical incompatibilities.
I also once set up a date with a self-proclaimed "incel" Chinese immigrant who was around the 150-160cm mark, but he got paranoid and thought it was a scam because I listed the height req on my profile, and I was really busy and not responding much because I was trying to nail down an internship at the same time 🤣
One time , I went on a date with a cishet dude who said he was 6'0", so I took the occasion to wear my heels, turns out dude lied and just looked like my son the entire time, he also had a bit of a babyface, and it didn't help he was a software engineer, and I was unemployed, but I talked circles around him in terms of computer stuff when I started infodumping about hackintoshing old vaio laptops over dinner.
Never spoke to him after that and neither did he to me lol, awkward all around lmao
5'9" is also not much bigger than 5'7', so it still isn't "quite short" in comparison.
Why would I feel insecure?
Not you specifically necessarily, but my comment got quite downvoted so I figured I'd include that as a disclaimer just in case
Why do you believe that anyone down voting you is insecure? Personally I down voted you because you are factually incorrect, and I would assume that is why others are doing so.
How am I factually incorrect? I didn't even state any facts. A statement like 5'7" is quite short is fairly subjective by its nature because short/tall are qualitative descriptors that it's hard to quantify even with a frame of reference and averages agreed upon.
Why should I answer your question if you refuse to answer mine?
I appreciate your honesty as a 5'7" dude.
Luckily I'm happily married while my wife is 5'6".
Lots of perks to my short dudes out there. Faster metabolism/more energy, longer life expectancy, better power-to-weight ratio, etc. I won't beat em in a sprint necessarily, but always have the advantage in the long-run.
Square-cubed law can be a bitch!
Hey that's the spirit! Glad you got someone!