Her tequila was legendary

Everyone in that “Clowns” thread. Also, rhythm gymnasts.

Big “Kiss of Life” energy. Maybe Bruce’s Hungry Heart frequently gives him palpitations.

That’s for Dolly stamped on a doubloon

I have you tagged as “19 year old day trader who needs therapy for his gambling addiction.” I’m sorry I missed your birthday. Tag updated.

I don’t know if it would do anything, especially if it’s a bad actor, but have you tried turning off background refresh under Settings > General? If completely turning it off makes it stop, you can go through tal’s method to figure out the culprit.

I’d say cancer, but I knew I’d get through that because there weren’t any other options. So probably dealing with things I’ve forgotten about or have been putting off. Those always seem like bigger things than cancer when I, in the middle of them. But now I’ve been cured for twenty years and I’ve also answered like, 5 of the 627 emails I’ve needed to answer for the past few years so things are looking up!

‘Cause your friends don’t dance and if they don’t dance, then I’ll move to the other side of the road at a respectable pace.

Held hands in the ER while doctors were setting their broken noses.

“Oh shit, this again?”

TIL god had a treat in his hand

Wait. THIS YEAR? fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

Don’t monetize your passion. Nine times out of ten, you will either starve or grow to hate that passion, and then you’ll have no passion for anything. In the case of music, pick your genre. Think of how many artists you know in that genre. Think of how many of them are making a living at it. Now imagine the number of people making music in that genre you’ve never heard of. Do searches on YouTube or streaming services for your type of music and see how many of them you recognize or have even heard of.

I’m not saying it’s impossible to make it, assuming you have at least a modicum of talent and a lot of industry connections, but it’s not probable enough to bank your future on.

Bonus round: of the people in your genre who have made it big, how many went to a school specifically for music?

Enjoy your time making and learning music. If you want to get better to enjoy playing more, seek some instruction on form or technique. Just have fun with it. Do some open mic nights. Make a band with some friends. Magic some videos of you playing on the internet.

Find something else to make money with. Do a budget to see how much money you need to make to live and be healthy. Not rich, but happy. Start seeing what professions can make you that kind of money. Do work you can stand to fund the things you enjoy.

As if the spiders weren’t bad enough, they have Death mayors too? Australia, you crazy.

You need to already be in the job market - if they’re looking at replacing you, you need to be looking at replacing them. And if you find a job where your partner’s dream job is, you just leave.

Isn’t Christian metal just lead paint?

“I mean, I know I’m brown, but it’s supposed to be in the other brown people’s soup.”

“Don’t let the sunshine fool you” Townes Van Zandt

Also:

I fell in love again that time that you said
"Fuck every cop who ever did his job!
And fuck every bank that never got robbed!
And fuck all the other banks, especially mine."

• Wingnut Dishwashers Union

It’s hilarious that you use Apple as an example. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apple_Corps_v_Apple_Computer

Urine speaks louder than words
On a politician or on a prison warden
Urine speaks louder than words

Yeah, each one I think of makes me wish I had picked it.

And so you're asking me, who does the dishes after the revolution?
Well, I do my own dishes now, I'll do our own dishes then
You know it's always the ones who don't who ask that fucking question