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What to care about today?

A social issue? The inadequacy of public education in lower income areas? The under-representation of nonwhites and women in certain fields? The increased anxiety and decreases cognitive function measured in Gen Z?

Something political? Like the pedophiles in charge of the nation? The pillaging of our national coffers by corporate interests? Or the immigration gestapo disappearing citizens and putting children in cages? Or maybe more seriously: the ongoing genocide of the Uyghurs or the Palestinians? Perhaps Putin's war on Ukraine?

Perhaps something more existential? The loss of pollinators such as bees and other flying insects? The currently-ongoing mass extinction event and loss of biodiversity? The almost certain rise in seawater temperatures? The increasing frequency and intensity of severe weather events and drought?

I think I'll get a little meta about it amd care about how little politicians seem to care about any of these things, and how little power I have to make a genuine positive influence on the world during my brief time in it.

The title isn't exaggeratory, I have been diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder in 2024. It took me over a year to realize I had an issue.

I didn't treat my friend well at all. I often mocked him or belittled him, but come 2025 I really did try to be better. I confessed to him my issue and told him I wanted to be better.

And yet in doing this, he lost a lot of trust in me. We got into more arguments and had this cycle of arguing, he tells me we're done, and he comes back to me and it starts over again.

And today? Well I told him we are in a super unhealthy cycle. That this is draining and it is bad for both of us. So that is it, we had a bromance breakup.

It fucking sucks. I hate losing a friend. I hope he can do better without me.

I'm getting old.

Being a good person who puts others over themselves sucks ass.

So I been on a business trip to Korea for a hot minute and got LG as an ISP. When getting them, it was pretty straightforward.

But guess what? To cancel them, they requested a scan of my ID Card.

I argued with them back and forth for like an hour and it ended with them saying they'd be okay taking a scan of my license to conceal carry a firearm as a scanned ID.

Not the worst, but fuck man. The writing is on the wall and shit is just getting worse every day. Privacy is an afterthought man, it sucks.

Least the soju was good.

Its hard to watch all of your friends becoming successful, I am stupid.

Even the fucking toilets at the shops and restaurants don't work, dude! I'M GONNA HAVE TO SHIT IN A BAG! 😭

Deleted

apologies if im not marking this correctly, Voyager only lets me mark image posts NSFW so I'll put it into a spoiler instead.

::: spoiler Tap for spoiler Had my first good day at work in a couple weeks left going home feeling good about myself for the first time in a while. I only have a ~8 minute drive home at most, less if I'm driving on a nearly empty road at 10:30pm like I was tonight. For context I'm 19, been driving since 16 but don't drive that often other than for work or groceries.

On either side of the road is just forest and swampland, it is florida after all. It's not uncommon to see deer at night. Though it is a lot rarer than when I was a kid as our area has been more developed. You'll also see other animals like raccoons, opossums, armadillos, bunnies, etc. As you can imagine seeing roadkill isn't out of the ordinary here.

sidenote, whole we're on the topic of wildlife my grandma used to have one of those hunting camera in her backyard and would leave out scrap food for animals to eat and get photographed. She eventually got 4 or 5 turkeys to trust her enough to show up and walk around her house during the daytime. They were all named Tom since we couldn't tell them apart.

Anyways, on my drive home tonight there was another car coming the other direction, an opossum ran out from the grass in front of us both. No warning beforehand, just a little guy running as fast as it could. I hit my brakes to let it get through my lane, but the other car didn't seem to notice or have time to react. It looked like it was pretty close to getting out of the way in time but I didn't really get to know for sure as I was still rolling pretty fast.

I could've kept driving and just gone home but I've always been one of those people that just has to see what happened or else the mystery will eat away at me. what if it was ok? what if it's injured and needs help?
I took a u-turn at a roundabout and thought I saw where it happened and saw nothing and got my hopes up for a second, but then I saw the tiny body on the road curled up not breathing. It looked to be pretty young, not wise enough to know how to avoid cars.
It didn't have a fearless death, but it seems it had a fairly painless one.

I know I could have done more, but I don't blame myself for that. I don't blame the other car for hitting it, and I don't blame the animal for its mistake. Just a shitty situation all around.
That doesn't make me any less upset though. I know these things happen and it's just a part of life, but it just sucks to see man. Theres a lot of bigger issues in the world but I still feel so bad for that little guy :( :::

I DID THE DUMB THING! I VERIFIED WITH A FACE SCAN AND SCAN OF MY ID!

Why? Well I had to verify with CompTIA to get my Sec+ certification, I passed by the way, and have been requesting to have my stuff deleted. CompTIA sent me to Pearson VUE who sent me back to CompTIA and now I am getting nowhere.

It has been like 3 weeks of email volleying and I have gotten nowhere. I don't know what to do. Should I keep pushing and risk my stuff spilling in a breach that will inevitably happen? Should I threaten legal action?

I am so fucked, dude. I am SO fucked! 😭👍️

i made myself get out of bed and called an old freind to meet up even though i know damn well i have 15 dollars to my name. on the way here, my timing belt started shredding and i had 2 choices, get it home safely in a limp, or go through with the date and get my car potentially towed. I went ahead and chose option 2 because im so starved for human contact. The last 6 months since my wife beat me and went to jail i have been homeless intermittently and ive been having ptsd flashbacks and nightmares and shit. She isolated me from everything and everyone for 10 years and it took this long to try and reach out to people. Ill be damned if anything will stop me. I have a great new job I start on monday that is my ticket out of all this, and I might have thrown that ticket out with my car today. Idk ill find out. Im not telling this dude ANY of that, im just gonna act normal as possible. but like im DYING on the inside jeesh. nobody knows buy yall really. i feel like im on the edge but im fighting it. times are tough as fuck i dont even eat every day. fuck

I’m 23F he’s 23 M

Hey guys, I will try to make this short but it’s hard without giving full context. So I started talking to this guy roughly 1.5-2months ago, we initially met through a friend of a friend. We initially just did sexual stuff and then started talking more… over the time, I had been confused on what he wanted from me (relationship or not?). I’m gonna just put in dot jots of the things he has done through out that upset me and made me feel as if he didn’t care…

1. ⁠when we first started talking and going out more often or whatever we had went to the movies and then at the end of the night I just wanted a nice quick hug so I was joking around laughing and I told him come give me a hugggg get outttt the car, and he didn’t bother. He made a comment saying “this isn’t a movie” or whatever. And I ended up slowly walking back to my car and he rolled up his window as soon as I got inside and left. This was also before we were clear that we are dating for intention of being partners
2. ⁠mind you, I cut off my guy best friend irl and a long term gaming buddy I had for him, out of respect. So that also pisses me off that I feel disrespected by him and I did those things which I know is bare minimum and trust me, I don’t care to do those for someone I want to be with but for respect to not be reciprocated idk?
3. ⁠1-2 weeks before it was clear he wanted more, he made a “joke” or whatever he said he didn’t mean it that way where he texted me saying “I can’t, I can’t, I can’t be in a relationship because I’m not emotionally mature or wtv” and this because I told him that emotional maturity is a biggest thing I look for in a relationship
4. ⁠he used to joke around and call me “dumb” “bitch” or whatever (I guess not in a serious way like we’d be doing a game or whatever) and then I ended up telling him I don’t like it and I think it’s rude. I ended up now telling him like ok whatever it’s fine like if we’re gaming or whatever it is cuz I do sometimes would say it back now so it doesn’t affect me as much in certain situations only.
5. ⁠I feel like whenever I tell him about my feelings and things he does to upset me, he becomes combative. It’s like he starts making all these excuses. When I told him about everything he did, he started going one for one of why he did that, not even acknowledging how I’m feeling. It’s just like going back and forth with someone who doesn’t see what they did wrong, and he even says that he doesn’t know what he did and I need to tell him. Like it’s not that hard and I’m honestly tired of explaining
6. ⁠tonight, I picked up these items from Facebook from this girl after work (11:30 pm) and she left it on her porch. I told him I’m going to be quickly picking up some stuff and he was chill about it over text and just saying oh why now? And I’m like well it’s only 7-10 min from my work and on my way back home. I shared my location with him and then he said to FaceTime him when I get there. I FaceTimed him as soon as I grabbed the bag as I just saw the message, and I let him know that I got them and I’m safe. And then he says something along the lines “so why are you FaceTiming me?” I’m like “what? U told me to” and says well u already got them so why” and was just having an attitude. And then he basically was telling me “dumbass” for going at night to grab stuff off Facebook and whatever and saying stuff like “it’s like those dumb bitches who go into the woods at 2 am and then something happens and people wonder omg why?” … I got upset after this and it made me cry because I don’t get why u have to call me these words.

And tbh, I never was treated like this by someone who supposedly likes me and see’s a future with me. It makes me upset because I want it to work and I know he’s a great guy and has a great soul underneath but there’s this part of him he seriously needs to work on or I am just being too extra/dramatic (as he says). I told him he upset me a lot tonight and just basically says “omg everything I do is bad” “you are taking it too far”….

Idk guys. I really like him and I’m supposed to meet his mom soon who really wants to meet me, I’m just getting emotionally exhausted tbh. And it’s not good for me to feel this way because I don’t want to end up fully not caring. Because that’s how it usually goes.

My stomach burns, literally out of stress. I wish to call someone, but there is no one right now.

I am from the country where Donald Orange attacked, and living in UAE.

UAE has no naturalization law. So no matter what a resident would never get citizenship.

UAE started deporting random people from random countries for national security reasons.

It did deport some years ago when their tensions between uae and my country. They would call you and ask you to pack within three days.

It is hard. I am not smart enough to move out to a country where I can settle.

And I rather be here, it is the country I know.

I am not very bright. I don't know what problems mentally I have except autism because I got diagnosed young and I can see the issues I have and had, but even that I wonder what is it exactly because they say it is a spectrum and don't like gradients, i like definitive diagnosis. Clear black and white

Diagnosis of mental or neurological stuff is not simple and costly.

I have the money... well, my father has, but I feel ethically I can't use it on me, except for absolute necessities.

I had memory lapses, the best the neurologist did was a test on paper! Questionnaire! And got diagnosed with MCI.

The same goes with Epilepsy, autism, etc.

I wish if there was a brain scan or something.

Anyway, that why I am very sick. I didn't treat many health issues since 2018, since I told him or maybe he told me, just sit and eat and do nothing.

I do remember though, that I told him I will eat and spend only on necessities. That why, I don't go out, buy stuff, or go doctors unless the situation is bad.

I tried to work and leave this country, i didn't realize how mentally slow I am. Well life humbles you.

I envy those in countries where they get help with things they can't do because of their condition, and oh they also get help to work. A job they are capable to do.

Sitting in a room 24/7 for over 6 years is not fun.

I am doomed, when he is gone, I don't know what I will do? Except end it.

If I got deported, I have no idea what I am gonna do, but end it.

I have online friends asking me to go learn programming, or something online to feel productive and happy, but it is not easy.

The stress is always there. Oh, I can't go back to my country, it is the country where Donald boy attacked 6 month ago.

Life is a game and I lost. Damn it... well, my stomach is not burning, I think typing these along with those hot tears helps feel better.

Peepeepoopoo

I didn't know humidity cause discomfort in cold temperature.

It has been not less than 60% whe that happens something bad happens to me that I can't describe.

I can't sleep, I don't feel okay to move or do something.

I didn't sleep for so long and when I get tired and kinda sleep, I wake up and feel sleepy until I sleep again.

I am fed up.

I have autism, and I can't buy a dehumidifier, it is complicated.

It is humiliating.

The air breeze or wind from.the AC, what should I call it! That air stings. Sticky heavy something not right.

I also sometime peepeepoopoo. You go peepee and then it turns to peepeepoopoo, it stinks these days not the feces rather the situation

...

My wife and I have a baby and a toddler who take an absurd amount of energy every day, my wife and my family can't stand each other, so I effectively don't have an immediate family, but the catch is my wife is not a nice person.

So I've given up my family for a person who is rude, demanding, impatient, doesn't show empathy, and is extremely controlling, but shows a nice face to everyone else.

The thought of divorce makes me sick to my stomach because of how difficult of a process it is, trying to explain all the changes to my toddler, how much harder solo parenting is, and being in a marriage and a home had a ton of financial and practical benefits, but I'm just so tired and lonely and sad.

I'm in therapy and we're in couples therapy, but she started pulling away the first time the therapist challenged her so I don't have any hope for genuine change.

It's just a Groundhog day of exhaustion, loneliness, and misery, and the only person left in my life i could lean on is at the core of the problems. I'm not going to kill myself, but things are so dark right now.