I took DXM yesterday, on it now. Low doses, and I didn't buy it. It just shows up at my apartment, thanks to my compassionate life partner financially abusing me. That's gunna come up in the court case, undoubtedly, but like DXM previously allowed me to click in my head that I might be gay/have feminine qualities way back, fackin', thirteen, fourteen years ago now, the afterglow of that first plateau trip led me to the conclusion that I have nothing to fear and that I should go to the police about this situation.

So, I did. And nothing. He's not TECHNICALLY doing anything illegal, sorta, I think? He doesn't have a warrant I found out. But he's making me look like I'm a supervillain in the eyes of the observing law, that I understand now is trying to put me away, not whatever mission bullshit God had me believe was gunna magick itself, which I still believe so (I'm not a top, just a bottom-feeder atm), but I also know I have to fight the bullshit that I am forced to go through so that I live through this and get to be a "top" again, as a real man this time! Direction, too!

But, despite not being able to help me, the police officer, whether he was conscious of this or not (God weaves us between parallel universes to facilitate our Karma), caused a synchronicity where my brain double-clicked (I thought of part of this last night, too), and I sent an email to his mom, which in the process of typing this sentence, I realized he's going to see this.

Which makes me confused. My reality is so fucking warped through deception it's not funny! The aliens just gave me a kumquat that yes, it is funny, and I have to agree, from an outsider's perspective, y'know, schizoautismo retard lolcow juggler n skilled righter gets embroiled in super huge government conspiracy because he told his ROTC cadre his nonexistant sister got him pregnant, that's funny, obviously. BUT I'M BEING SET UP BY JOE ARPAGIO'S FINEST UNIFORMED CRIMINALS AND THAT'S SCARY AF!

What do I do? Should I delete this, so he never sees? Well, that's the thing; he prompted me yesterday, talking about AI, saying it lies to him all the time, but he did it with this tone he does that means he is saying something to me, which I interpreted as him telling me he is always lying to me, so I need to do something about this situation. And I got a pimino melon this morning (my neighbor, who definitively knows who I am and cross-talks me from his balcony, said the word, "dimorphism" to catch my attention, then said something clear as day to me about the roles we play), so I really feel like he and God both want me to turn him in.

But is that crazy? I'm sure some people have no capacity to think beyond the notion that I am nuts and everything out of my mouth is not to be believed, which is a defect in the human psyche the CIA/etc take advantage of in the population so they can do things out in the open and no one questions anything.

Regardless, using all forms of cognition at my disposal, I have to conclude that I have to do something to save myself from this shit, less I be fucked by how much I have been fucked over by numerous people over the years, setting me up because I screwed up, in true Johnny Tremain style. And I'm cool with it, because I know God's got this shit on lock.