If you didn't know, people with ADHD (and Autism) have problems with interoception, your internal perception of your body and its states, though ADHD and Autism can both affect it differently. I like Cleveland Clinic's description, though I wouldn't say it's prescriptive to everyone with ADHD/Autism or that it will always be the same way for those who do experience it.
Autism . Interoception accuracy (how correct you are at identifying feelings) is low. For example, it might be hard for you to regulate or express your emotions. You might also have trouble identifying bodily needs, like hunger.
ADHD . Interoception attention (how often you notice signals) is strong but you may have trouble acting on those signals. For example, you feel thirsty but can’t decide what you want to drink.
It could be that you simply don't even notice your body saying you have to eat or go to the bathroom because you're hyperfocused on something, you mix up hunger with thirst, or it could be that you notice but can't bring yourself to do something about it.
Either way, ADHD and Autism can both affect how you understand the state of your body. That is not the same as your impulse control, desires, cravings, or planning skills. You can listen to your body saying it's hungry, be tempted to get the high-dopamine cookies out, but make a sandwich instead.
Listening to your body is NOT the same as doing exactly what your brain wants. That doesn't necessarily mean it's easy or always possible to actually do what's best for yourself when your brain is actively working against you, but I think that painting listening to your body as something that fundamentally means giving up control to your impulses is just plain reductive and stupid.
If anything, choosing not to listen to your body can mean you don't listen to signals that could prevent those unwanted behaviors. For the longest time I just ate as many treats as I could because I felt as though I couldn't stop myself, and eating sugar just felt too good, until I eventually realized that it always gave me a stomachache and made me feel sluggish, so now I can more readily stop myself by comparing my current state (no treat, feeling fine) with my possible future state (momentary treat, stomachache for the rest of the day), and decide that maybe I shouldn't have my 10th cookie of the day 💀
I spent YEARS putting myself through pain while overeating unhealthy food because I simply didn't pay enough attention to my body to realize that I didn't always feel this way... until I began overeating treats that day. And now that I'm medicated, if I don't pay attention to my body, I won't realize I should be hungry and I won't eat food until the evening when I've been running off 400 calories all day.
The 400 calorie day sounds like me before I started calorie counting, to make sure I at least eat a minimum of 1500 calories. I just don't notice when I should eat, and then food is hard to put together so I put it off.
Drink, on the other hand, I'm good at. I'm up to maybe 3 liters a day because salty water helps my circulation and makes me feel good.
Your story about overeating sweets and feeling like crap and not putting it together... that reminds me of taking a daily multivitamin with my lunch, then consistently feeling so very sick to my stomach an hour later. Took me maybe 2 weeks to figure out the pill was the problem. (I went back to Flintstones with iron, no problem. I'm hesitant to try an adult multivitamin again because I had such a bad reaction before. Plus, I like chewable pills.)
For some reason, in the last 6 years, I lost the ability to feel full up at lunch. It doesn't affect me at breakfast or dinner, but once I have lunch, I will continue to feel hungrier and hungrier and I end up bingeing on junk and then feeling disgusted with myself. So I just have to skip lunch now.
The only way to stop the munchies is to immediately play a video game, but I have to want to play it for it to work. It's annoying because lunch is the only time I want to load up on vegetables. By dinnertime, I can't be bothered to do more than microwave a bowl of sweetcorn with my oven chips.
False. All of it. Listening to your body is absolutely the treatment for ADHD. The post has confused listening with soothing. The problem is we aren't taught how to listen and are stuck in an endless cycle of soothing overstimulated nerves.
This is a fantastic comment. Not necessarily because it's universally true, but because it highlights variance in lived experience. There is a truth, but not the truth.
It highlights the reality that your body sends a demand for action, but it diminishes and oversimplifies the great challenge, the true mountain, of consciously mapping a instinctive solution, to a true need, to an optimal course of action to meet the need.
I want chips? Am I hungry? Is my blood sugar low? Am I experiencing an acute deficiency of saturated fats? Are my electrolytes imbalanced? Although it's likely chips will solve it, there are several distinct underlying issues your body says chips are the solution. "Belly not full" is a gross oversimplification of what the issue may be, and without a full comprehension of the specific nature of the desire for chips, it's possible and likely an attempt to outsmart yourself will end in failure.
I bring this specific case up... I even shared it and my surrounding confusion with my doctor... because a few weeks after starting vyvans I had the desire to eat a vegetable for the first time in approximately 40 years. It was SHOCKING to me to realize that my body was already able to add meaningful specificity to my brutish and animal nature.
And to be honest... "chips" is probably by a large margin the least complex. A cigarette. An energy drink. Alcohol. The depth of confusion of root cause on the alchemy your subconscious has been formulating for decades of trial and error, behind your back?
When Karen says to listen to your body, they are saying one thing. It is not the thing that ADHD people need to hear. They are not the same thing. That is OPs point, and they are right. The mechanics are fundamentally different. It isn't wrong to highlight that Karen's communicative intention is flatly based on a distinct experience which is not directly applicable in a meaningful way.
You're saying "Listen to your body... and know that it is giving you a solution rather than telling you a problem, your goal is to bridge that gap".
Karen isn't false. OP isn't false. You aren't false. You're all just expressing lived experience.
"Listen to your body" and "Listen to your brain" are two very different things. Your body isn't going "hmm, we're a bit low on salt, EAT CHIPS NOW", it's just reporting low sodium levels to your brain. It's your brain taking that signal, interpreting it through the lens of your experiences and how you've trained it to think, and making the decision that you should seek out and devour chips. If you had never tried chips, your brain would not have that association, and would come up with a different approach to fixing your sodium levels.
That's the difference between listening to your brain, which is screaming for the quick fix of junk food, and promising itself dopamine as a reward, and listening to your body so you can make a conscious decision on how to approach the situation. It's not necessarily easy, and it takes practice, but it is possible.
Could you please give a couple of examples of what listening to your body looks like? I'm trying to understand myself better, I've existed as this body for 40+years and still don't understand it. I was 30 before I realized hunger and thirst feel the same for me. Halp
I figure this is a low blood-sugar thing. I didn't used to get tired when I was hungry, but being my 30s has meant a lot of changes around how my body reacts to hunger, including getting tired. Then if I go too long without eating, I end up in physical pain. Long gone are the days where I could skip breakfast, skip lunch, and survive just fine until after my school/work day.
I don't know if it'll help you, but I've noticed that my cravings for "sweet" are usually a sign of thirst. I don't eat a lot of candy, so my go-to sweets are usually fruits. Fruits are hydrating, so it makes sense that the sensations got crossed somewhere in my nervous system. Now I sometimes drink water when I think I want something sweet and it works. (For me, at least. YMMV)
Using a first aid analogy, there are signs and symptoms. Symptoms are what you're ferling and experiencing, and signs are changes that can be percieved externally, so if your symptoms of thirst and hunger are similar, you can also look at signs; is my tongue unusually dry, have I recently had a drink, has my sweat changed? That sort of thing.
Ideally you want to be assessing your symptoms, whilst ignoring your brains "default" response to them. Does anything hurt? Do I feel fully alert? Do I feel weaker than usual? Notice the actual sensations from your body, and you can work out what different patterns of them mean.
parents giving kids no discipline, no responsibility, not teaching delayed gratification, and just letting them grow up doing whatever they want instead of forming good habits is a big part of this mess... I know because I suffer from this and it's too damn easy to blame "neurodivergence"
(it's probably worse for the current generation since they grew up on infinite scroll brainrot as well)
Those are all issues worth talking about but when you package it this way it gets a little too close to "have you tried not being depressed" meme.
ADHD is a neurocognitive disorder that absolutely includes abnormal brain chemistry, among another few dozen traits that make your suggestions rather shallow.
more like "have you tried resetting your brain and rewiring the way it was wired during your cognitive development" (as I just blamed "a big part of it" on early development - not on your own will)
It absolutely starts before that (as possibly the most heritable disorder), but parenting can definitely exacerbate the disorder. For more context, the set of genes responsible for ADHD are those responsible for producing various collagens (there are many types, they all do something slightly different, but there's enough overlap that losing one or two will still allow a viable embryo). Collagen does a lot in the body (like holding ligaments to bones, which is why there's such overlap between hypermobility disorders and ADHD), but one of the main things it affects is the interstitium. The interstitium is the recently classified organ responsible for channeling and distributing the various signaling/growth/immune system molecules throughout the body. When a collagen missense gene fails to create or changes the shape of a collagen subtype, the shape of the interstitium's grooves and its distribution changes throughout the body; in development, that changes how the brain grows, and what it has access to in its regions (usually leading to deficits in the prefrontal cortex). ADHD and autism are absolutely baked in from the start and impossible to reverse.
Funny how it's actually the opposite, parents offering too much control, rather than education and understanding, while delegating that education and care to The State and Capital that seeks to exploit, which leaves people unable to care for themselves.
It's the lack of consequences early on that's missing. If you give control to kids and they have no natural feedback that they can use to correct themselves, they're not going to do well. That means letting them fail stuff, get detentions, get bullying, etc. kids need to be left to fail and learn for themselves how to deal. Sure, parents need to offer support and encouragement and help out at certain times too.
That means letting them fail stuff, get detentions, get bullying, etc. kids need to be left to fail and learn for themselves how to deal.
I was one of these kids that didn't get much support from their parents and had to solve most things alone. I felt every consequence when I was too late for something, when I couldn't find the mental energy to concentrate on a given task or when I broke a social rule I didn't even know of. The only thing it lead to was avoidance of certain situations/problems and masking of the underlying issues.
You seem "normal" from an outside perspective, but the issues are still there, just invisible to everyone else. And guess what, not treating/accommodateing chronic issues makes things worse, not better. Constantly masking takes a huge toll on your mental health. You basically learn that you yourself are the problem because the only way to ever get acknowledged for anything is by not being yourself. Combine that with all the social issues and bullying you experience due to not understanding the social contract and you get an adult with depression/burnout, an identity crisis and cPTSD as well as ADHD/Autism.
You then have to spend your 20/30s unlearning everything you learned due to the oh so glorious consequences in you childhood. Otherwise you just sink deeper into your hole.
I will add, that "support" includes parents needing to tell beforehand, what is appropriate behavior, since that step is failed too often. Then if the kids mess up, they can recognize easier, what went wrong, compared to just fumbling and getting consequences for it, and having to figure out why. Outsourcing the responsibility to teach, just to the environment, leads to catastrophes too. Neither suffocating nor negligence, are good strategies for raising children.
Treat yourself like you would that Labrador puppy. Set guardrails and habit patterns in place. Use positive feedback to turn them into good habits and behaviour loops.
And just like training said Labrador, it's a LOT fucking easier to say than to actually do!
Yeah, that’s not worked for me either, it just micromanages my current hyper-fixation in great detail and depth. It’s a two-wolves situation, with impulsivity and in-depth nerdery
My body just wants to sleep. If I listened to it I could easily do 16h+ sleeps every day. It's a fucking daily battle to exist in the real world and stay awake long enough to get anything done.
So many times I'm having a shit day or can't fall asleep and then there's a volunteer fire call and suddenly I'm putting my gear on in the back of the engine with the windows down going 65mph and everything is right in my brain
Listen to your body; not your brain. Stomach says "I want salt" that's okay, have a salty snack. If the brain says "I need to binge 137 episides of anime RIGHT FUCKING NOW" you can ignore it.
Welding, sourdough, Mandarin. The body wants one of them. The other two are wrong signals. Nobody taught the feral little cunt to distinguish one from the other.
Most unlikely your body wants to learn Mandarin... Anyways a part of you wants it...
Its all about integration of different parts that learned to go alone into the world without taking the other parts into account. So listening to your body (basically perceptions) is important but not the solution. More important is the listening itself and the process of trying to find out what resonates with many parts of me. Then go for a good compromise or deal. That's quite hard but you stop loosing yourself and build up integrity.
58 replies
'The Haunted Shopping Trolley' sounds like the title to a YA book that is actually a maths course pretending to be a fantasy novel.
I'm not a woman, but I think I am that woman.
You and me both brothersister
And my axe!
"Listen to your body"
My body: eat pizza
That's as much your brain saying it.
Pretty much every meal. Hot cheese and carbs until we die, probably younger than we'd like.
If you didn't know, people with ADHD (and Autism) have problems with interoception, your internal perception of your body and its states, though ADHD and Autism can both affect it differently. I like Cleveland Clinic's description, though I wouldn't say it's prescriptive to everyone with ADHD/Autism or that it will always be the same way for those who do experience it.
It could be that you simply don't even notice your body saying you have to eat or go to the bathroom because you're hyperfocused on something, you mix up hunger with thirst, or it could be that you notice but can't bring yourself to do something about it.
Either way, ADHD and Autism can both affect how you understand the state of your body. That is not the same as your impulse control, desires, cravings, or planning skills. You can listen to your body saying it's hungry, be tempted to get the high-dopamine cookies out, but make a sandwich instead.
Listening to your body is NOT the same as doing exactly what your brain wants. That doesn't necessarily mean it's easy or always possible to actually do what's best for yourself when your brain is actively working against you, but I think that painting listening to your body as something that fundamentally means giving up control to your impulses is just plain reductive and stupid.
If anything, choosing not to listen to your body can mean you don't listen to signals that could prevent those unwanted behaviors. For the longest time I just ate as many treats as I could because I felt as though I couldn't stop myself, and eating sugar just felt too good, until I eventually realized that it always gave me a stomachache and made me feel sluggish, so now I can more readily stop myself by comparing my current state (no treat, feeling fine) with my possible future state (momentary treat, stomachache for the rest of the day), and decide that maybe I shouldn't have my 10th cookie of the day 💀
I spent YEARS putting myself through pain while overeating unhealthy food because I simply didn't pay enough attention to my body to realize that I didn't always feel this way... until I began overeating treats that day. And now that I'm medicated, if I don't pay attention to my body, I won't realize I should be hungry and I won't eat food until the evening when I've been running off 400 calories all day.
The 400 calorie day sounds like me before I started calorie counting, to make sure I at least eat a minimum of 1500 calories. I just don't notice when I should eat, and then food is hard to put together so I put it off.
Drink, on the other hand, I'm good at. I'm up to maybe 3 liters a day because salty water helps my circulation and makes me feel good.
Your story about overeating sweets and feeling like crap and not putting it together... that reminds me of taking a daily multivitamin with my lunch, then consistently feeling so very sick to my stomach an hour later. Took me maybe 2 weeks to figure out the pill was the problem. (I went back to Flintstones with iron, no problem. I'm hesitant to try an adult multivitamin again because I had such a bad reaction before. Plus, I like chewable pills.)
And then there's my body:
"Drink. Water. Always.
Also sometimes Whiskey, and 1-2 'caffeine' a day, but have a water open at the same time."
It's in my hand as I type this..
For some reason, in the last 6 years, I lost the ability to feel full up at lunch. It doesn't affect me at breakfast or dinner, but once I have lunch, I will continue to feel hungrier and hungrier and I end up bingeing on junk and then feeling disgusted with myself. So I just have to skip lunch now.
The only way to stop the munchies is to immediately play a video game, but I have to want to play it for it to work. It's annoying because lunch is the only time I want to load up on vegetables. By dinnertime, I can't be bothered to do more than microwave a bowl of sweetcorn with my oven chips.
False. All of it. Listening to your body is absolutely the treatment for ADHD. The post has confused listening with soothing. The problem is we aren't taught how to listen and are stuck in an endless cycle of soothing overstimulated nerves.
This is a fantastic comment. Not necessarily because it's universally true, but because it highlights variance in lived experience. There is a truth, but not the truth.
It highlights the reality that your body sends a demand for action, but it diminishes and oversimplifies the great challenge, the true mountain, of consciously mapping a instinctive solution, to a true need, to an optimal course of action to meet the need.
I want chips? Am I hungry? Is my blood sugar low? Am I experiencing an acute deficiency of saturated fats? Are my electrolytes imbalanced? Although it's likely chips will solve it, there are several distinct underlying issues your body says chips are the solution. "Belly not full" is a gross oversimplification of what the issue may be, and without a full comprehension of the specific nature of the desire for chips, it's possible and likely an attempt to outsmart yourself will end in failure.
I bring this specific case up... I even shared it and my surrounding confusion with my doctor... because a few weeks after starting vyvans I had the desire to eat a vegetable for the first time in approximately 40 years. It was SHOCKING to me to realize that my body was already able to add meaningful specificity to my brutish and animal nature.
And to be honest... "chips" is probably by a large margin the least complex. A cigarette. An energy drink. Alcohol. The depth of confusion of root cause on the alchemy your subconscious has been formulating for decades of trial and error, behind your back?
When Karen says to listen to your body, they are saying one thing. It is not the thing that ADHD people need to hear. They are not the same thing. That is OPs point, and they are right. The mechanics are fundamentally different. It isn't wrong to highlight that Karen's communicative intention is flatly based on a distinct experience which is not directly applicable in a meaningful way.
You're saying "Listen to your body... and know that it is giving you a solution rather than telling you a problem, your goal is to bridge that gap".
Karen isn't false. OP isn't false. You aren't false. You're all just expressing lived experience.
"Listen to your body" and "Listen to your brain" are two very different things. Your body isn't going "hmm, we're a bit low on salt, EAT CHIPS NOW", it's just reporting low sodium levels to your brain. It's your brain taking that signal, interpreting it through the lens of your experiences and how you've trained it to think, and making the decision that you should seek out and devour chips. If you had never tried chips, your brain would not have that association, and would come up with a different approach to fixing your sodium levels.
That's the difference between listening to your brain, which is screaming for the quick fix of junk food, and promising itself dopamine as a reward, and listening to your body so you can make a conscious decision on how to approach the situation. It's not necessarily easy, and it takes practice, but it is possible.
Could you please give a couple of examples of what listening to your body looks like? I'm trying to understand myself better, I've existed as this body for 40+years and still don't understand it. I was 30 before I realized hunger and thirst feel the same for me. Halp
Hunger thirst and tiredness can all feel the same. "I WANT SUMFING!" (I don't understand my cat when she says this either)
I figure this is a low blood-sugar thing. I didn't used to get tired when I was hungry, but being my 30s has meant a lot of changes around how my body reacts to hunger, including getting tired. Then if I go too long without eating, I end up in physical pain. Long gone are the days where I could skip breakfast, skip lunch, and survive just fine until after my school/work day.
Sigh.
I don't know if it'll help you, but I've noticed that my cravings for "sweet" are usually a sign of thirst. I don't eat a lot of candy, so my go-to sweets are usually fruits. Fruits are hydrating, so it makes sense that the sensations got crossed somewhere in my nervous system. Now I sometimes drink water when I think I want something sweet and it works. (For me, at least. YMMV)
I relate. The amount of times I’ve said “am I hungry or thirsty?… hmm, don’t know.” And then done nothing about either one.
Using a first aid analogy, there are signs and symptoms. Symptoms are what you're ferling and experiencing, and signs are changes that can be percieved externally, so if your symptoms of thirst and hunger are similar, you can also look at signs; is my tongue unusually dry, have I recently had a drink, has my sweat changed? That sort of thing.
Ideally you want to be assessing your symptoms, whilst ignoring your brains "default" response to them. Does anything hurt? Do I feel fully alert? Do I feel weaker than usual? Notice the actual sensations from your body, and you can work out what different patterns of them mean.
Mindfulness
So what else do you listen to instead? Asking for a friend…
I think you have to, like, psychologically reanimate the ghost of your mother and then have her tell you what to do.
Doesn't matter if she's still alive, you need a functioning ghost.
parents giving kids no discipline, no responsibility, not teaching delayed gratification, and just letting them grow up doing whatever they want instead of forming good habits is a big part of this mess... I know because I suffer from this and it's too damn easy to blame "neurodivergence"
(it's probably worse for the current generation since they grew up on infinite scroll brainrot as well)
Those are all issues worth talking about but when you package it this way it gets a little too close to "have you tried not being depressed" meme.
ADHD is a neurocognitive disorder that absolutely includes abnormal brain chemistry, among another few dozen traits that make your suggestions rather shallow.
more like "have you tried resetting your brain and rewiring the way it was wired during your cognitive development" (as I just blamed "a big part of it" on early development - not on your own will)
It absolutely starts before that (as possibly the most heritable disorder), but parenting can definitely exacerbate the disorder. For more context, the set of genes responsible for ADHD are those responsible for producing various collagens (there are many types, they all do something slightly different, but there's enough overlap that losing one or two will still allow a viable embryo). Collagen does a lot in the body (like holding ligaments to bones, which is why there's such overlap between hypermobility disorders and ADHD), but one of the main things it affects is the interstitium. The interstitium is the recently classified organ responsible for channeling and distributing the various signaling/growth/immune system molecules throughout the body. When a collagen missense gene fails to create or changes the shape of a collagen subtype, the shape of the interstitium's grooves and its distribution changes throughout the body; in development, that changes how the brain grows, and what it has access to in its regions (usually leading to deficits in the prefrontal cortex). ADHD and autism are absolutely baked in from the start and impossible to reverse.
Funny how it's actually the opposite, parents offering too much control, rather than education and understanding, while delegating that education and care to The State and Capital that seeks to exploit, which leaves people unable to care for themselves.
It's the lack of consequences early on that's missing. If you give control to kids and they have no natural feedback that they can use to correct themselves, they're not going to do well. That means letting them fail stuff, get detentions, get bullying, etc. kids need to be left to fail and learn for themselves how to deal. Sure, parents need to offer support and encouragement and help out at certain times too.
I was one of these kids that didn't get much support from their parents and had to solve most things alone. I felt every consequence when I was too late for something, when I couldn't find the mental energy to concentrate on a given task or when I broke a social rule I didn't even know of. The only thing it lead to was avoidance of certain situations/problems and masking of the underlying issues.
You seem "normal" from an outside perspective, but the issues are still there, just invisible to everyone else. And guess what, not treating/accommodateing chronic issues makes things worse, not better. Constantly masking takes a huge toll on your mental health. You basically learn that you yourself are the problem because the only way to ever get acknowledged for anything is by not being yourself. Combine that with all the social issues and bullying you experience due to not understanding the social contract and you get an adult with depression/burnout, an identity crisis and cPTSD as well as ADHD/Autism.
You then have to spend your 20/30s unlearning everything you learned due to the oh so glorious consequences in you childhood. Otherwise you just sink deeper into your hole.
I will add, that "support" includes parents needing to tell beforehand, what is appropriate behavior, since that step is failed too often. Then if the kids mess up, they can recognize easier, what went wrong, compared to just fumbling and getting consequences for it, and having to figure out why. Outsourcing the responsibility to teach, just to the environment, leads to catastrophes too. Neither suffocating nor negligence, are good strategies for raising children.
Treat yourself like you would that Labrador puppy. Set guardrails and habit patterns in place. Use positive feedback to turn them into good habits and behaviour loops.
And just like training said Labrador, it's a LOT fucking easier to say than to actually do!
Aaand it walked in to traffic, again... Comeback here litlle buddy!*
*I once raised a pup with the positive reinforcement method. Such a good and loving dog. I aged very quickly the first 12 months
The autistic part of my brain (It doesn't always work out well)
Yeah, that’s not worked for me either, it just micromanages my current hyper-fixation in great detail and depth. It’s a two-wolves situation, with impulsivity and in-depth nerdery
My wife. Saves a ton of money.
A therapist.
Personally, a strict routine and a veritable army of spreadsheets to do what the brain will not.
You have to imagine yourself giving advice to a friend.
...The problem is following through
My body just wants to sleep. If I listened to it I could easily do 16h+ sleeps every day. It's a fucking daily battle to exist in the real world and stay awake long enough to get anything done.
So fuckin real I can literally sleep as long as I want in a day, sometimes 14-20 hours at a time. Funnily enough I can never sleep when I WANT to.
Awake for 36 hours with 2 hours if sleep, and have an important meeting tomorrow? ZERO sleep. Nothing urgent? 17 hours of sleep.
learn welding and sourdough please
The welding trades are rampant with adhd mfers. See also, fire departments.
So many times I'm having a shit day or can't fall asleep and then there's a volunteer fire call and suddenly I'm putting my gear on in the back of the engine with the windows down going 65mph and everything is right in my brain
if you dont want to work with your hands, learn microsoldering instead
This is damn near Shakespeare level prose
Yes that lady is a poet.
If I listen to my body I'd be in diabetic ketoacidosis within a day. My body wants to kill me and I will not give it the satisfaction.
Listen doesnt mean thoughtlessly obey all its urges.
Listen to your body; not your brain. Stomach says "I want salt" that's okay, have a salty snack. If the brain says "I need to binge 137 episides of anime RIGHT FUCKING NOW" you can ignore it.
It's not the stomach. It's still the brain.
That's just the brain trying to take credit for what the stomach said.
Edit: This is the toes: these posts are coming from inside the brain! Don't trust it!
I'm distracted by "skip fire". Fire in a boat? On a pallet? Game for sadistic children?
Not sure what you call them in America. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skip_(container)
Dumpster!
For further clarity: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roll-off_(dumpster)
Welding, sourdough, Mandarin. The body wants one of them. The other two are wrong signals. Nobody taught the feral little cunt to distinguish one from the other.
Most unlikely your body wants to learn Mandarin... Anyways a part of you wants it...
Its all about integration of different parts that learned to go alone into the world without taking the other parts into account. So listening to your body (basically perceptions) is important but not the solution. More important is the listening itself and the process of trying to find out what resonates with many parts of me. Then go for a good compromise or deal. That's quite hard but you stop loosing yourself and build up integrity.