Happy marriage through compromise.
My wife married into my Warhammer collection. We have a Warhammer room. I'm pretty sure she doesn't even like Warhammer but has her own painted figurines.
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i mean you're an adult, you can buy your own jar and enjoy whatever you like in parallel, why are people like that?
his wife does all the grocery shopping and he refuses to do domestic chores, so her revenge is never buying crunchy peanut butter
yup then it's fully deserved and he's not an adult, he's a manchild
I don't think that's fair as a blanket statement
yep
... It's a JOKE for fuck's sake.
maybe what i wrote too... ? idk man it's the internet we're here to shitpost, it's a meme community
Jokes generally have to be true, on some relatable level, in order to be funny.
Funny joke. Boomer go Ha Ha.
"Let me tell you something. I have not controlled a SINGLE financial decision in this house since 1987 and I am PAYING for it. I put a ROOF over this woman's head for 40 YEARS and somehow SHE controls the checkbook. Every week she does the shopping WITHOUT me, like I am not the one whose PENSION is funding the whole OPERATION. I fought for this country and I cannot get a peanut butter with some TEXTURE because apparently BARBARA knows best about EVERYTHING now."
Exactly. It's that tired old stereotype that you either have to have an adversarial relationship with your SO, or let them have their way all the time... Did you not both agree to a partnership!?
I think it's from a time when people(both men and women, but mostly women) married for social and economic reasons. Those reasons kept people in relationships who had long since checked out.
Now it resonates with fewer people because women can leave bad relationships more easily.
That's also why I assume the manisphere is a thing because there are a lot of sour people who are upset they are not owed a person just for existing.
Relationship dysfunction is just assumed to be an unalterable, unavoidable feature of reality for Boomers, so, much of their humor is literally them coping with their inability to be fully functional people.
See also: Every single 'Pobody's Nerfect' Minions boomer-meme.
In I guess fairness to them: What do you expect from a generation raised by parents with undiagnosed PTSD?
“We couldn’t possibly buy two jars of peanut butter.”
He doesn't do the shopping. He could easily go to the shops himself.
This. Lazy ass man, cant be arsed to go shopping. Thinks it’s a “woman’s job”. Complains when she doesnt serve his wishes.
Someone I listen to loves peanut butter but his partner is allergic, so he doesn't have peanut butter anymore. I know the stakes are higher, but it's more valid to match the solution. This post feels almost like intentionally suffering to make yourself a Martyr when the solution is very simple.
Peanut allergies are often sensitive enough to be triggered by trace amounts of peanuts in the environment, so completely eliminating it to keep a partner safe makes sense. The OP is clearly depicting a toxic variety of hetero relationships where guys refuse to make an effort at compromise and just say “my wife always gets her way.”
Though I do wonder how many people out there worry about a deadly peanut allergy they grew out of but haven't realized they can now enjoy one of the best foods in existence.
My dad likes crunchy peanut butter, and my mom likes smooth. I grew up in a two peanut butter jar household. Despite decades of that, they are still married today.
Some say it's impossible
I solved the problem by liking both.
why not just buy your own peanut butter?
My wife likes Skippy, I like Jif.
We keep a jar of each around and use each other's in a pinch.
I do love the Warhammer comparison though. My wife and I have a D&D collection. She does not play D&D. Her part of the collection is the Lego D&D minifigs.
Both Skippy and Jif are added-sugar garbage.
Adams is where it's at.
Do those brands actually taste any different?
I find Skippy to be a bit too oily, but they aren't very different in taste.
We do that, similar situation and 2 different peanut butters. Also if your SO likes something why not buy it for them.
I do the shopping, i buy her smooth and me crunchy. How is that difficult? Love does not require suffering.
Yeah some decisions require picking one or the other. A $4 jar of peanut butter doesn't seem like one of those things.
Especially when buying 2 jars means they are both being used at half rate, so you end up spending the same amount of $/month
I hate people like this because they're just miserable on purpose.
My partner doesn't like Marmite and I do. Solution, I buy Marmite and she doesn't eat it.
Just buy the peanut butter you like, as well.
2 jars of peanut butter? In this economy?
If both versions cost the same, it literally makes no difference
How much does it cost to flatten peanuts?
It lasts twice as long though
4 times as long, if both jars are crunchy
It is just peanut butter, not like he gave up on his hobbies. Unless ofcourse peanut butter is the one thing he is living for. To me it sounds like he can't be bothered to deal with two jars of peanut all the time so he just said "eh fuck it"
It's just boomer humour, haha wife bad BS.
For some people there isn't another choice. It's be in a relationship and be miserable, or be miserable and alone.
and a lot of people have control issues in relationships. they can't be happy or secure unless the other person suffers.
Those people need therapy because that's not normal way of thinking. If you're miserable in a relationship what's the point in staying in the relationship?
it's less miserable than being alone.
not everyone has the luxury of therapy or happiness dude. that's a thing wealthy people worry about. working-class people need someone to split the rent with.
What, like in Ethiopia? I'm sure they have both, too.
No.
A healthy relatinship is also one where both partners understand, respects and upholds the other's right to have personal preferences and enjoy them.
The most basic show of respect here would be to have two separate jars of peanut butter, so both can enjoy their favorite.
Most people have pleasure when seeing their loved ones having pleasure themselves. It shows affection and care for the other and is a basic show of empathy.
It's a good post for the laughs but it is a depressing admission for a relationship that long.
What are the consequences of the dude buying a separate peanut butter jar for him? Divorce? Accusations of lying and being unfaithful by thought?
If you’re going to get a divorce over peanut butter, you might be better off alone. But that’s just my political opinion.
There is a possibility that his preference for peanut butter isn't that strong, and it's easier to just stock one kind. It's also possible she eats significantly more peanut butter than him, so his jar would sit unfinished for much longer, possibly separating out.
And if it's something like that, it'd just be a funny way to state their situation.
One time, while on dispatch for a client, I was stuck on the phone with their ISP. Behind me were all of the company interns, arguing about peanut butter.
It’s always stuck with me for two reasons. 1: One guy was arguing that crunchy peanut butter was like regular peanut butter, but with added wasps. 2: I regret every day that I did not ask the Comcast guy to weigh in over the phone.
I have so many questions about what that guy thought peanut butter is, and what it's made of.
He was probably confusing peanut butter with figs.
I think he really just didn’t like the texture. I can’t see the reasoning still, but I’ll admit at the time, his argument swayed me.
...You know what? That makes as much sense as anything else I can think of.
Yeah, the wasps thing had me thinking he might've had an allergy, but probably wouldn't be eating smooth peanut butter either then...
My son likes creamy, husband likes crunchy, so I stock both?
Husband did give up sour cream, but If he wanted it so bad, hes get it himself or ask me. I dont like blue cheese, yet we always have it in the house.
This is dumb.
Yeah, feels kinda like boomer energy. Gave up something unecessary to prove his love in a way that was never asked for, probably resents her for it or pulls that out as a talisman any time she brings up something she does care about because marriage isn't about partnership; it's a constant power struggle.
A lot of people don't believe in a relationship that isn't a power struggle. They don't believe in relationships that are cooperative. Many people are seeking relationships where they dominate or are dominated.
I date. I meet plenty of women who tell me on the first date that I must give up something to prove to them my worth or dedication to them. Because the point of the relationship to her is for men to suffer for her sake, and anything the man pursues for his own personal happiness is a her losing out on what should be given to her.
This might include hobbies, friends, possessions, lifestyle choices, and pets.
I also meet women occasionally who basically want me to tell them how to dress, what to think, what friends to have, etc. Which is kind of the flipside.
Chunky peanutbutter has gotten worse so I stopped getting it too.
Ensmoothification is real
ya for condiments everyone literally can just have their own jar. You are not required to use everything someone else used.
Can you not just buy... two jars of peanut butter?
They are still working on emptying the 80 gallon drum of smooth peanut butter they got at their wedding.
....what? Maybe try reading the post again?
That settles it. The straights are absolutely not OK. I need no other evidence.
As a gay guy, I don't think that's a straight exclusive thing.
Don't marry, don't romance, learn a thing or two from those buddists and stop desiring things just because everyone else has them, take what is given.
Having a roomate, marriage, renting, it all binds you to a person and makes you vulnerable.
I like peanut butter too much for all that
Wife bad. Haha.
Peak comedy
Are the straights ok?
I don't think they have been for some time...
No, I think Iran mined it, or something. But this about peanut butter.
My mother likes Scott brand toilet paper. My father likes Charmin. My father installed a second spool holder next to the toilet. One is loaded with Scott, the other with Charmin. They'll celebrate their 46th wedding anniversary this year.
If "we like different brands/styles of household consumable goods" isn't a solvable problem, if you solve it by buying one of each kind so everybody gets what they want, and your partner goes to un-solve it...unpartner them, because they're unfit.
So your mother's a masochist, then?
Smooth peanut butter if you like crunchy is just a minor disappointment. Crunchy if you like smooth is like eating gravel paste.
I've been married 17 years. I like wearing swimming trunks, and my wife likes wearing bikinis. I haven't worn trunks in 17 years.
I've been married for 17 years. I don't want to wash my hands after peeing, my wife wants me to wash my hands after peeing. I've washed my hands for 17 years.
Maybe you should do the shopping then someday.
This is very stupid.
My spouse was diagnosed later in life with a severe gluten intolerance. She went from enjoying beer and soft pretzels to being told “never again if you don’t want to shit yourself in public”
We have a simple rule. Bog standard gluten stuff is fine for me to have, sandwich bread, cereal, etc.
They told me that it was just very upsetting if I was enjoying some delicious gluten treat that they could no longer have.
I love my spouse, so I don’t eat delicious gluten treats in front of them because it would make them upset. Instead I figured out how to make lots of gluten free treats we can both enjoy together. Sometimes I miss the ease of getting a Popeyes chicken sandwich (I still can as long as I don’t eat it right in front of them) but I’ve learned to make gluten free fried chicken we can both enjoy.
Maybe other people would think this is silly, but the person I love is worth it to me.
Why did you switch mid-narrative from calling your spouse a "she" to a "them?"
My spouse identifies as non-binary and I try my best to use their preferred pronouns. That’s a more recent development and I’m used to calling them by feminine pronouns.
The first “she” is an old habit, my mistake.
Does it have a vagina? Or a penis?
They have a brain, and someday maybe you can too.
Dw, you're not getting any in either case
What a weird question to ask about someone
It's already been said, but yeah just get both? I've been married over 20 years, and I'm vegan while my wife is omnivore. Hasn't been a big problem.
now i think you wife is a dinosaur.
She's a cutie-saurus.
i get the bullshit of the joke. but many relationships aren't about compromise, they are about who wins and who loses. and once you start losing you stay down, been in one of those. 5 suicide attempt later and I still get PTSD attacks.
A relationship shouldn't be like that. If your partner makes you feel like this, leave them.
it got really abusive, but it's hard to get out. kids were involved, and she had control of my finances, so no lawyer would even advice me. and as a guy there were no resources for me. When I call the cops because I was being beaten, all they did is tell me that if I touched her they'll lock me up.
Are you free now?
ish, divorce happened, I'm free, have an amazing friend group whom I adore and cannot believe they love me. but also afraid of ICE because US is a shit 3rd world fascist state. but that abuse is better than domestic abuse.
EDIT: Nwm, not eating a ban for another's sake.
My wife gave up crunchy for me. I told her I couldn't sleep with that abomination in the house.
When my wife wants to paint a room, she will go to several stores, and come home with dozens of white paint chips. Then she starts asking me which ones I like, and they all just look like white to me.
So I tell her to pick out her three favorites, and I'll look at those, choose my favorite, and then paint the room whatever color she tells me.
A beautiful arrangement.
It works.
I had the exact same experience when I moved in with my girlfriend recently
It's a thing.
What a stupid thing. Like you can't have 2 different jars of peanut butter in your fucking cabinets? My spouse prefers Jif, and I prefer Peter Pan. We have a jar of each in the cabinet. Because we aren't emotionally stunted goblins pretending to be adult humans. God this tweet makes me irrationally angry. "haha, marriage is the worst, amirite guys?" ugh.
On the flip side, OP, I love the text you added in your post. That's amazing.
Peanut Butter is $40 a jar! Nobody can afford 2!
You can add your own peanuts… all peanut butter is creamy in the beginning, that’s what they do to make it crunchy.
As a life-long peanut butter enthusiast who loves all kinds of peanut butter, I actually think this is BETTER than buying a jar of each. I keep a jar of regular peanuts and honey roasted peanuts for exactly this
this guy can still eat nuts and here he is complaining... smdh
Been married 11 years. I like Crunchy peanut butter, my wife is allergic to peanuts. I only eat peanut butter crackers when I travel for work because I eat light on days I travel and peanut butter is mostly fats and oils anyway.
We compromised by having no kind of peanut butter! (Our kid is allergic)
Can relate, then at some point I realized, she barely ever eats peanut butter. So now we still have almost exclusively smooth.
A lot of people that turn everything into a therapy session in here.
Hint. He does in fact buy crunchy for himself. That's the joke.
marry that woman. no, wait, divorce then remarry that woman. well. shit.
Level 1: Creamy Level 2: Crunchy/Chunky Level 3: Use both for different applications Level 4: Almond/Pecan/Cashew/Other butters Level 5: Homemade peanut butter with your own addatives. Whatever nuts you have lying around. Cocoa powder, protein powder, chili oil, cayenne, etc.
What makes this post for me is OPs PFP as Mark from Peep Show.
He didn’t claim the relationship had solid foundations.
Bisexuality 😏