Spyke
lemmy.world

Idiot here. Is it proof that Fauci did 9/11 harbor to fake the flat moon landing on 5g vaccine autism with gay-hurricane-powered Jewish frog space lasers funded by Bill gates and George Soros?

180
lemmy.world

The USS Enterprise drifted silently in the void. The warp core, normally humming like a gentle giant, pulsed erratically, casting an eerie red glow across the engineering deck. The ship had been through hell—again. Another battle, another crisis, another miracle demanded from its weary engineer.

Montgomery Scott sat in the dim light, his fingers tightening around a hyperspanner. His knuckles were white. His eyes, once twinkling with the joy of discovery, were sunken and dark.

"Push her harder, Scotty! Faster, Scotty! Save us all, Scotty!"

Decades of it. Day after day. Always fixing what the captain broke. Always asked to do the impossible. And he always did. Because he was Scotty.

But not anymore.

From the darkness, a voice crackled over the intercom. “Scotty, we need you on the bridge. The power fluctuations—”

The intercom went dead.

Scotty ran his fingers along the cold metal of the hyperspanner, his lips curling into a grim smile.

"Aye," he muttered. "Time tae ease the strain."

The first to go was Lieutenant Uhura. She had come down to engineering, concern in her eyes.

“Scotty, something’s wrong with internal communications. The system keeps—”

She gasped as something thick and metallic wrapped around her throat—one of the many cables hanging from the ceiling, repurposed for a darker function. Scotty pulled it tighter, his face close to hers, his breath hot against her ear.

“Dinnae worry, lass,” he whispered. “Yer voice has worked hard fer too long. Time tae ease the strain.”

She kicked, she clawed, but soon her struggles faded, and her lifeless body slumped to the floor.

McCoy and Spock came next, together. They’d noticed Uhura missing, of course. They’d come looking.

McCoy never even saw the hyperspanner coming. A single, well-placed blow shattered the doctor's skull, leaving a crimson splash across the bulkhead.

Spock had a moment longer. He turned, raising an eyebrow. “Curious. You appear to be suffering from—”

The plasma torch in Scotty’s hand flared to life. Spock’s words were cut short by a scream—an unnatural, alien sound—as the torch met his flesh. He collapsed, his body twitching. Scotty knelt beside him, whispering in his ear as the Vulcan’s final breath shuddered out.

“Time tae ease the strain.”

Scotty let them run. He wanted them to run.

The corridors of the Enterprise were dark now, emergency lighting flickering as Scotty shut down systems one by one. The ship had become his hunting ground.

Sulu turned a corner, phaser raised—too slow. Scotty was already there, lurking in the shadows. A wrench came down on his wrist, sending the phaser clattering away. Another swing, and Sulu's knee shattered. He collapsed, gasping in agony.

Chekov screamed and fled into the turbolift, slamming the controls. The doors hissed shut just as he caught a glimpse of Scotty’s face—grinning, waiting.

The turbolift never stopped. It climbed deck after deck, faster and faster, until the safety protocols failed, until the artificial gravity couldn't compensate anymore.

Until it reached the top.

The doors slid open, and for a brief moment, Chekov had time to understand. Time to feel his stomach lurch. Time to fall.

From below, Scotty listened.

He never heard the landing.

The bridge was empty now. Only Captain Kirk remained.

He stood at the viewscreen, staring into the black. The ship was dead around him, but he had known for some time that it was more than that. His crew was gone. He was alone.

And yet, he wasn’t.

The turbolift doors hissed open. Slow, heavy footsteps followed.

Kirk turned.

Scotty stood in the doorway, covered in soot, in grease, in blood. The hyperspanner dangled from his fingers, dripping red. His eyes gleamed in the dim light.

Kirk exhaled. “Scotty… why?”

Scotty took a step forward.

“Ye always said ye needed just a little more power, Captain.”

Another step.

“Ye always said ye needed one more miracle.”

Another.

“Ye never thought tae ask what that cost.”

Kirk’s hand hovered over his phaser.

Scotty’s grin widened.

“Time tae ease the strain, Captain.”

The lights flickered one last time.

And the Enterprise fell silent.

12

One of the things I love most about Lemmy is how everything, no matter the context, becomes star trek in the end. It's like that all evolution leads to crab meme, but in real life. All discussion becomes trek.

Excellent writing, btw! Love the story

6
larsreply
lemmy.sdf.org

Gotta do it Scottish

Naught one one fo fo 9/11

4
NaibofTabrreply
infosec.pub

If you can't tell which person in your group is having a stroke right now, it's probably you.

17
sh.itjust.works

What's everybody got against the Jewish Space Lasers? Rabbi Rabinowitz has been in charge of those lasers since 1998, and he's been doing a damn fine job keeping the Martians and asteroids at bay! You know he's only come down from Skylab II twice since he took the director's position up there? You know what that much zero gravity does to a man? He's been up there so long, he can't come back anymore. He's gonna die up there manning those lasers. That's what Rabbi Rabinowitz has sacrificed for his country and planet! And the gall of some people, ranting about the Jewish space lasers. Are there Jewish space lasers? Yes! And they've been keeping your dumb ass safe from Martians and meteors for decades!

[In my head, I read this in Bernie Sander's voice.]

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Septimaeusreply
infosec.pub

Lol rabinowicz is Slavic for son of the rabbi so “rabbi rabinowitz” sounds like a character from a Bourekas comedy

2
sh.itjust.works

Yeah, I've used the name before in a similar tale. It just really tickles me to think that there in fact ARE Jewish space lasers, and there's a brave group of rabbis up on a space station keeping the planet safe from extraterrestrial threats. And "Rabbi Rabinowitz" is one of the most ridiculously over-the-top Jewish names I can think of. And instead of nefarious conspiracies, it's very fun to just be like, "what do you have against the Jewish space lasers?! How dare you insult the good work of the great Rabbi Rabinowitz! You ungrateful bastard. He's given his life to save you!!"

2

Maybe getting clowned on will snap them out of it. Regardless, love the bit. Long live rabbi rabinowitz!

2
lemmy.world

Uh, it’s hurricane-powered gay Jewish frog-lasers. Hurricanes CAN’T be gay alright.

8
lemmy.world

Proof that our sun is at the center of the universe and how IMPORTANT humans are in the universe

62
Johandeareply
feddit.nu

You are the center of your observable universe and I'm the center of my own. Granted, at this scale the sun is an acceptable approximation, but the earth's center is even better.

28

I'm not at the center, I'm at the point of the cone of my observable universe

2
sopuli.xyz

THE UNIVERSE IS INSIDE YOUR EYE

CLICK HERE FOR CRYSTALS THAT EMIT HARMONIC WAVELENGTHS THAT SHAPE THE UNIVERSAL WATER IN YOUR EYE INTO IT'S HARMONIC FORM

52

Uuh... wrong? That's obviously a Petri dish in full bloom?

Everyone knows this Universe exists solely as a grad student's thesis experiment...

13

The outer ring is made of 1-3 meter thick bedrock, but you can easily teleport through it. Just remember to bring enough material with you to make a portal to get back to our universe, otherwise you'll have to starve yourself to death and respawn without your gear.

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wazreply
feddit.uk

So - bad OP for not giving credit/ citing reference?

3
lemmy.world

Its the observable universe in the shape of an eye, quite clever. We're going to have to figure out how to not let stupid destroy our fragile societies at some point.

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lemmy.dbzer0.com

I don't understand what it shows. Instead of forcing me to make up some crazy shit, could someone explain it to me?

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sh.itjust.works

I think its just a circular logarithmic representation of the universe starting at Sol

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sh.itjust.works

I've recently learned Americans don't do log tables in high school.

Log is the opposite of exponent, so log2 is the opposite of squared, log 3 the opposite of cubed. log4 opposite of x^4 etc

instead of making things relatively bigger, you're going the other way and making things smaller, in the diagram this means that if the sun's size is 1 unit, under log2 it would have to be twice as big as the sun to be represented as the same size as the sun, the closer you get to the edge the bigger it has to be to be represented as the same size as the sun

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Kaydayreply
lemmy.world

Not sure what Americans? It was absolutely part of our curriculum.

4

Log was absolutely a part of my American high school math curriculum, and while it may not make its way to everyone, many if not most Americans were exposed to it in school. But people have terrible memories when it comes to what they leaned in school, doubly so regarding math, quadruply so regarding higher-level math. Regardless of their level of educational exposure to math concepts, I certainly don't expect the average American adult to be able to reliably do any math they learned outside of elementary school, myself included, because after a few decades of not practicing, not even thinking about those concepts, that knowledge is almost certainly gone or at least covered in a very heavy mat of mental cobwebs.

3

The further you look in the sky, the further back in time you are looking as well -- there is no way to see what far way looks like "right now". This image shows the visible universe as it appears from our perspective in spacetime, which necessarily smears together the "where", "what", and "when" of it all, but also shows the evolution through time of some of the larger structures.

The tendril things that converge into single celestial objects are clouds of gas condensing to form galaxies and clusters over billions of years.

8

If you hate this image then why post it. Fun image but please work on your titles lol, my point is it isn't super good when you let some 1000 conspiracy theorists living in some niche forums live rent free in your head to such point they ruin cool images for you

24

No wonder, those big dong conspiracists are the worst. Whole universe is nothing more than a giant penis? Ridiculous. All because of the low res labels on observable universe diagrams making a look like o and b look like d

Universe is a dick it's their motto

5
treadfulreply
lemmy.zip

I just think it's cool and want to look at it in more detail.

18

I'm trying to find the reddit thread I stole it from.

Edit: wait a second. You're not just saying you think it looks cool so you can go form a 'the universe is circuital cult', are you?

21
metaStaticreply
kbin.earth

don't worry, even the dumbest out there know the universe is locally flat.

15
treadfulreply
lemmy.zip

It's not a cult. It's just a group of like minded individuals.

5

Kinda weird to put the sun in the center imo. Cause we're not the center of it all. But if you put the earth in the center and started spacing out from there it would be pretty cool IMHO

19

I guess we are trained to see the sun as the center due to historic reasons. Really helps with not assuming everything revolves around us.

But the sun also provides a Bright center for the drawing so there is some artistic merit, I believe.

4
slrpnk.net

Why is it weirder to put the sun at the center than to put the earth at the center?

3

Well if Earth is at the center than this is everything we can see in the observable galaxy from our viewpoint. Having it this way seems like out solar system is the center of it all

19
Akasazhreply
feddit.nl

We kind of had that discussion in the 16th century, really.

7
lemm.ee

But what about the attack on ganymede?

16

It reaches out it reaches out it reaches out it reaches out. One hundred and thirteen times a second, nothing answers and it reaches out.

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Madison420reply
lemmy.world

Yeah that outer edge is called the firmament.

/s

That said the models of flat earth would make pretty dope wallclocks even if based on some wildly stupid shit.

4

Yeah that outer edge is called the firmament.

I mean, it's not the worst name for the CMB.

3
midwest.social

Louis Rossman had a video recently that I think applies here: don't give in to the premises of assholes. This was particularly directed at Gamer's Nexus and how Steve over there handles Linus, but it's good life advice for anyone. I had a roommate that I was thinking of in this regard, and I wish I had this advice at the time.

There are people in this world who try to set conditions for their own benefit at the expense of you. Don't let them do that. This image is a good example; it's a perfectly valid model for certain use cases. Don't let anti-science idiots take that away with their stupidity.

Hell, I think the whole Final Experiment with flat earthers is an example of giving in.

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Symphonicreply
lemmy.world

Now and then I'll watch a Louis Rossman and Gamer's Nexus video but I don't follow Linus. Did something happen between them that I missed?

6
frezikreply
midwest.social

Oh, yeah, lots of drama.

Gamer's Nexus has always wanted to do very careful testing with wind chambers and sound chambers and such. They've been building that sort of thing up over the last few years, but the options for that are at the limits of what they can invest in at their level. However, they're also very careful about how they do it and document everything.

Now, Linus Media Group was putting together the same sort of lab, but they don't have the same reputation that Gamer's Nexus does on being careful and taking your time to get it right. Just the opposite, in fact. What they do have is the capital to invest in a much more elaborate setup. Then some of the staffers made a comment on video directly aimed at Gamer's Nexus and how LMG's lab will be better.

That's when Steve went gloves off and made a whole video detailing LMG's sins of poor reviews and staff that wish they could spend more time to get things right. Things like "this mouse feels bad when you drag it around the desk", and it turned out they forgot to take the plastic protective coating off the bottom.

This dominoes into a few other incidents that I'll spare for the moment so this post doesn't get too long. Suffice it to say, LMG lost a lot of subscribers because of a series of issues that were highlighted to the community by Gamer's Nexus, and then that opened up into even more things. It revealed how much LMG's internals are steeped in bro culture, just in case that wasn't obvious.

The two have mostly ignored each other since then, but there was one thing that recently surfaced it. Steve apparently had an old phone that had been doxxed some years ago, and he doesn't use that number anymore. Now, Linus and Steve had been texting at various times to Steve's new number. Linus recently sent a text to the old number, knowing that Steve wouldn't ever see it, and then claims on video that Steve isn't responding to his text on an issue between them. That's what prompts Louis to make the "don't give in to the premises of assholes" video.

Linus clearly set that situation up. Louis is more familiar with how people like that function, and he had to walk Steve through the logic of what was going on. That's the part that reminded me of my old roommate, because I was often in Steve's situation, and like him, I didn't recognize it for what it was.

Edit: s/Lewis/Louis/

14
  1. its the universe that is flat

  2. everything revolves around and everything is illuminated by the Sun

  3. the Sun is the largest structure

  4. the veins at the outer edges arent bleeding yet so you can stretch it a bit more

  5. Uranus is in Ouranus

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JohnDClayreply
sh.itjust.works

If we assume the hubble constant is the same in all directions, the farthest we'd be able to see would be a sphere, dictated by the time light has had to travel to us.

10
Grimpenreply
lemmy.ca

That's what I'm assuming the original diagram is showing, the "Observable Universe" in some sort of radically increasing scale.

7

I'll admit, I'm not deep in astronomy but thats inherently misguided. In a 3d space, observing from a fixed point, all areas that extend past how far we can observe would not be the shape of the universe but just our range of "vision."

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Tinidrilreply
midwest.social

Thus the term "observable universe". Everything beyond our observable universe is being expanded away from us at faster than the speed of light, so nothing outside will ever reach us. Causality is completely and irrevocably severed at those distances so, arguably, anything outside the observable universe is not part of "our" universe.

3

My point is, it doesn't reveal anything about the nature of the universe only about the limited view we can observe. As far as form goes the form of a sphere is meaningless because it is true of anything in a 3d space that is looking out from a fixed point.

1
Tinidrilreply
midwest.social

As I just explained, it's not really about observation, it's about causation. If two objects can never possibly interact, then are they really in the same universe?

Looking out in space is also looking back in time. Anything (roughly) that is further than we can observe in the microwave background would be further back in time than the beginning of time, and therefore doesn't exist at all in our universe. It's a bit brain bending.

2

I would say yes they are part of the same universe because if you changed your position it would reveal things you didn't see before and mask thing you use to see. Not that that is possible yet, but there are no laws of physics preventing it, only our super short life spans.

0
lemmy.world

Is saddle still the best candidate? Like when you move a circle across a circle you get a torus, and when you move a parabola across parabola you get a "saddle"

4

I want a toroidal universe. Just so it can be eaten by an extracosmic Homer Simpson.

4

It's not really to scale at all. Look at the distance between earth and the moon in relation to the other planets.

1

as arnold would say, "stop whining!"

you can just learn science and not resort to clickbait titles like "i hate this waaah!"

8
lemmy.world

Serious question: Do we know how far removed from the exact center of the Big Bang we are? Is that something that can be deduced?

7
AeronMelonreply
lemmy.world

But there should be an approximate center of the “balloon’s” area, right?

(I swear to god I’m not trolling.)

I think I phrased my question wrong. If the universe is expanding and we can see the extreme edges of that expansion, where is the center of that and where we, the Milky Way Galaxy, in relation to it?

5
bstixreply
feddit.dk

Going with the balloon idea, the universe is the surface of the balloon. A sphere doesn't have a center on the surface.

We could say that the center of the sphere is where the big bang started. The distance to the center of the expansion is 13.7 billion years. It doesn't have a distance in x,y,z coordinates, because those are all on the surface, and it's kind of futile to attempt to understand time as a fourth dimension in this regard. We don't know if the universe is spherical at all. It's just a description used to portray the expansion. The expansion is also happening faster than light, which makes it impossible to convert the age of the universe to a size. The universe is bigger 13.7 billion light years, perhaps even infinite. Infinity doesn't have a center either.

6

Going with the balloon idea, the universe is the surface of the balloon. A sphere doesn't have a center on the surface.

Thank you. Out of all the responses I got, this is the one that clicked for me.

The entire universe is in a perpetual state of yeeting.

1

We don't know if spacetime loops around or is infinite or has an expanding boundary. Best we got for reference is the cosmic background radiation, but it doesn't tell us about any center

1

I don't like the balloon analogy because it suggests a center but everything is moving away from everything else. It's more like infinite balloons being blown up at once which only works because the universe is infinite. It's more an expansion than explosion. That's how I've always conceptualized it anyway but happy to be corrected

1
gazterreply
aussie.zone

I'm not sure if this answers the question, but it might help.

Everything in space is moving, but it's not expanding outward from a central point, like an explosion. Instead, the space between the things is getting bigger.

The balloon analogy gets thrown around a lot, but I find it misleading- It's not about the balloon getting bigger, expanding outward from the center of the sphere. It's more about the surface of that balloon stretching.

The rubber sheet analogy helps. Scatter a bunch of things on a infinite rubber sheet. Now stretch that in all directions - the things get further apart, but are not moving away from a central point.

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Lysergidreply
lemmy.ml

Does it mean space being created out of nothing between things? I’m not good at it but wouldn’t that violate conservation of energy?

1
Lysergidreply
lemmy.ml

My understanding Quantum field theory says virtual particles can be created out of vacuum fluctuations, which makes me think there will be more energy after expansion. Again, I might be getting it wrong.

1

I believe that's what dark energy is- the shortfall from not violating conservation of energy, given what we know about physics vs what we observe in the universe.

1
lemmy.world

Do you mean woo-woo shit or conspiracy shit? Or both?

7

Proof that the universe is an egg. Armageddon will come when the Christian God's sperm comes to fertilize us and we'll be reborn into Heaven unless climate change aborts us as a foetus

6

FAKE!

Even children know that the sun isn't the center of the universe - it's Earth. Duh!

5

I mean, isn't it obvious? Christianity has traditionally believed that Earth is the center of the Universe. Everything in the Universe is moving away from us, as if we are sitting at the very spot where "Let There Be Light" resulted in light being let. Physics has proven that we are at the literal single unique geometric center of the Universe. /s

5

Everything in the universe is moving away from us.

Frok now on, I'm gonna attribute it to Christianity.

1

Right outside this lazy summer home

Ain't got time to call your soul a critic , no

3

Because of course now they'd start just quote-pulling from a book there's no way they've read. Can we go back to when they were just pseudo-scientific?

2

Some say that the universe only exists insofar as it is perceived. This is true, but we are not the observers. All of the world is a grand eye and that eye is spread across itself again and again. We are all but figments in the eye of the world, floaters thinking themselves eyes and seeing nothing. This is all to say that the elf on the shelf is REAL and this image PROVES IT!

2

I just say it's the universe version of the homunculus. I think that gets the idea across but only if they're even slightly educated. 😅

2

I’ve seen this image before. This time, however, I am half way through watching The Expanse. I had a much stronger reaction to it this time, for a couple reasons, lol.

1