Spyke
feddit.dk

Dear linux users. Is it a red flag if she is active in a Catholic Dating group?

Edit:. and that she is still on reddit?

358
noridereply
lemm.ee

Why would they need to date anyway? That's just questioning God's Plan for them.

74

It's God's way of training them for their true partner. Free will and all that. Now kisth.

14

God works in mysterious ways. Maybe their one and only, doesnt even use an iphone!

6
Lucy :3reply
feddit.org

Yes. We only accept our true gods and leaders here: Linus, Richard, Tux and Xenia.

35
feddit.uk

Ooh, I'm a cash cow apparently.

But seriously, are there really women who talk about men in those terms?

123
Barbarianreply
sh.itjust.works

But seriously, are there really women who talk about men in those terms?

Yes. Personally, I see it as the mirror image of the "tradwife" thing where toxic men see their partner as a subservient maid. Seeing men as primarily an income source comes from a similar place imho.

138
sp3ctr4lreply
lemmy.zip

Yep, they've been called 'gold diggers', for quite a while now.

There is still a huge portion of American women across the political spectrum, across wealth classes, across religious or irreligious beliefs, who ultimately have a huge part of what they want in a partner be 'how much stuff can he buy me', who will bully or shame or guilt trip or emasculate or outright violently abuse their male partner, regardless of how hypocritical this is with their other espoused beliefs, to get them to pay for things for them or cover their debts.

Just get on tiktok or instagram, you basically can't miss it.

Its more than just the opposite number of conservative tradwives. There are plenty of self described liberal or leftist, feminists or social activists of one kind or another that ultimately still want their male partners to provide far more for them than they provide for their partner.

10

I don't think that's a fair comparison as Nerd is usually seen as a negative trait, where having good traditional traits is seen as a positive.

It's taking a nerd and using that negativity despite not liking it to exploit gain.

Where as having traditional wife is choose a positive because you like that positive.

1
lemy.lol

If I can't be a milk cow, then at least let me be a cash cow

30
fmstratreply
lemmy.nowsci.com

You have never opened the box of "Female Dating Strategy". Welcome to the world of "low value males"

24

Just looked through some of that stuff. Holy hell, it would be easier to be seen as without sin through the eyes of an angry old testament God than it would be to be seen as worthy of dating from that crowd. And that's fine, because I would want less than zero to do with it.

(Assuming it's real. Who knows? Could be a bunch of neckbeards cosplaying, but if I've learned anything in life, it's that there are shitty shitty men in this world, and that there are equally shitty shitty women in this world)

17

The "trad wives" (traditionalist / paleoconservative middle class women who believe that their religion is good for women) are looking for a husband in the traditional sense, a type of business owner / patriarch who owns them and provides for them; see: husbandry. That's so that they can produce a lot of offspring while pretending that raising kids in near or full homeschooling is a good thing and she's very successful (culturally).

They're the homologues of incels and traditionalist bros who want to be rich so that they maintain some informal harem. And they deserve each other.

14

Yeah, and we shouldn't suppose women can't degrade as much as men, that's unfair. r/femaledatingstrategy had an overblown fame for being a femcel den before it got banned, you can read on them in the media. But you can discover more than that on chan-boards, as they are probably the origin of a lingvo natural to this discourse. Just like with in incels, there's a typology of women and men adapted to biological and social context a typical ciswoman is in.

As for IRL, I've heard such terms only as a joke, but that means there's some penetration into higher net.

13

Every gold digger ever. Books about it, subreddits. You been living under a rock? Literally, good how to marry a rich man, and there will be digital or printed guidebooks

5

Idahoan here - yeah coming from a fairly mormon-laden family tree (and community), it's pretty common around here. And like others said it typically goes both ways - the guys treat it like the gals are helpless without a man to carry the income. This place is fucking backwards and culturally prehistoric.

Don't even get me started on the bigotry & maltreatment towards trans/gay folks. If there were a progress bar for moving toward healthy / compassionate behavior towards those groups this place would be at fucking 0%, genuinely. Obscenely disrespectful.

2

That person should've seen how much gold I farmed in WoW using my Honorbuddy bot!

38
psmgxreply
lemmy.world

The messiest polycule breakup / explosion was a bunch of autistic IT workers around the DC area. Sub Dom drama plus one dude fucked his pesudo-girlfriends sister.

I'd just got back from working overseas and was renting a room in their house. Just kinda watching the whole thing burn. While getting back to normal.

17
lemmy.world

Being poly doesn't make relationships less real, how ignorant. She wasn't a pseudogirlfriend. He was also a real piece of shit.

13
lemmy.world

If he's poly and and she's poly and everyone knew everything, is it still awful of him to have sex with her sister? Seems like it's OK if it's OK with everyone, even if other people find it gross?

1
lemmy.world

Why do people think poly=no boundaries?

I know of very very few poly people who would be okay with that. And even if they were, poly requires open communication, and he did it behind her back (which we know she wasn't okay with it because it ended their relationship). So a double whammy.

Highly recommend the book Opening Up to understand how many different types of poly there are and what they might look like.

3
lemmy.world

Sorry, I didn't mean to cause offence at all, I just assumed that in a poly relationships the boundaries were open for negotiation, and that like you say open communication would be key. I didn't know he went behind her back, I know nothing about this story other than what I read on this thread.

I get that in a conventional relationship, leaving someone for their best friend or their sibling would be a particularly heinous betrayal, but didn't assume that that would be the same for someone in a poly relationship. I didn't mean to offend anyone by asking and I apologise for any and all offence caused.

3

I get that and I appreciate how respectful you're being. I think we can tell by the subtext that it wasn't okay to sleep with her sister (they broke up over this, after all)... and also that is kinda soft incest (to share a sex partner between siblings) so majority of poly people in the west would really not be okay with it due to social norms.

2
Tjareply
programming.dev

Definitely should check your future wife's whole online comment history, just to be safe.

3

My current spouse and I have full transparency with each other about our socials :)

It just organically happened over many years. There is no distrust if we're on each other's phones, and we respect stated boundaries.

It's nice.

2
TheFririshreply
jlai.lu

Wait until you see femaledatingstrategy then.

12
VinnyDaCatreply
lemmy.world

Would've thought FDS had been shut down by now after the grooming scandal.

6
VinnyDaCatreply
lemmy.world

Someone leaked their discord and there were a lot of instances of them discussing grooming as an avenue to creating their "perfect high value male" or whatever they called it.

5

I didn't even know about that they always come up with a new thing.

1
sh.itjust.works

Nerds fix stuff around the house? Girl, I couldn't even repair that plumbing if I wanted to. This is a job for a professional.

64
Skullgridreply
lemmy.world

Nerd here that was EXTREMELY disappointed in losing the opportunity to own a house.

I wanted to get into the home electronics/plumbing stuff. Although to be honest, I am less keen on the plumbing since it's a wet mess.

34
ludreply

Yeah, PoW (Power over Water) is awesome! I use it everywhere.

8
Tjareply
programming.dev

Depends if you are messing with blue pipes or black ones.

1
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

Actually, some nerds are handy with electronics and stuff like that, myself included.

20
abbadon420reply
lemm.ee

It could be even worse. Some needs enjoy to learn things, anything. Doesn't,t matter if it's NixOs or plastering.

21

Oh yeah, I love learning things. It doesn't mean I love actually doing them.

11

This is me. Software developer by day, endless diyer and hobby starter by night (at least on nights when I'm not dissociating on the couch)

11

Let's not monopolize the word nerds for us computer nerds. There are also engineering nerds for example, the guys that have 2 3d printers, 3 CNC machines, and a few industrial robot arms in their garage so that they can build the tiniest bike ever.

Nerds of all sciences unite!

15
Lupecreply
lemm.ee

It says a lot that when I read that my first thought was "oh so like keeping the self hosted services running and whatnot" for a second 😅

10
feddit.nl

Apparently, Catholic dating is all about money

Usually what they actually mean by "strong family values"

61

"Neckbeards unite! We have some advice to give!"

10
lemmy.world

No way am I dating a Catholic. I will not be a "cash cow" for their weird religion.

44
programming.dev

Is there any reason all(or most) catholics would want that and it isnt just these people on reddit?

8

I grew up Catholic, and (at least here, Catholicism is a really big place) it's not so much "he has money" as it is "he will bring stability."

The second commenter's "cash cow" comment is a bit of an outlier in my experience, because usually the highlights of dating a nerd are more akin to the second comment. They'll be an active father and attentive husband, and they're less likely to cheat (in their view). I've also heard things like this about D&D/Warhammer players, because they use their imagination alot (making them good at entertaining children) and the hobbies take a lot of focus (meaning they'll be willing and able to tackle problems that arise).

Older catholics are used to men whose only role in the family is "produce baby and produce money", so a lot of modern dating advice is in the guise of "make sure he's a good man before you marry him"

12
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

Because most people nowadays see everything as a transaction, including "love". You really can't expect anything else in a society that sees everything through the prism of money.

7
lemmy.world

Because most people nowadays see everything as a transaction

Because most people conservatives nowadays see everything as a transaction

FTFY

5
lemmy.world

Define "liberal". Many liberals these days are conservative rather than progressive, so I won't disagree with your statement.

Conservatives are not able to experience empathy for anyone outside of their in-group, so they tend to see every interaction with "others" as transactional.

Conservatism is a vile plague of inhumanity, oppression and death and should be treated as such. It is due for a cure.

8
Jarixreply
lemmy.world

Conservatism is a vile plague of inhumanity, oppression and death and should be treated as such. It is due for a cure.

And yet they seem to be the majority, or close to it. So one has to ask, why is that so many people turn to it. It has to give them value. And is that value real or perceived.

For some it is very real, usually the exceptionally wealthy. Which means conservatism is profitable.

Not having empathy for anyone outside of your in group would make it easy to dismiss or justify the fact that the first rule of capitalism is find a weakness and exploit it

3

Conservativism and Capitalism are closely tied. They both profit from people's weaknesses and flaws.

3
Valmondreply
lemmy.world

American?

I mean it could be true everywhere but it dure seems exacerbated in rhe USA.

3
WldFyrereply
lemm.ee

But more so that Catholics and other fundamentalists expect the man to be the provider, and largely base the worth of the man on how much money he makes. If you think that's gross and demeaning, then don't fucking date Catholics lol

3
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

Really? I thought Catholicism was about Jesus, sharing, caring, love... guess I was wrong... who would have thought that a religion that is allegedly supposed to spread piece and love, would be all about money, huh 🤔.

-1

When has Catholicism never been about money? They literally have codified paying your way into heaven for nearly 2000 years with "indulgences" lol

It's like one of the most blatant examples of a corrupt religion being used to control and siphon money from people, it has one of the most well documented, terrible histories.

1

These girls are old school. You make the money, they pump out the children. They don't believe in birth control or abortion, so if you want to maximize your reproductive fitness, you could do worse than a Catholic girl.

-5

Dated a few of Catholics, and they aren't any grosser than the Protestants, Atheists, Muslims, or Buddhists I've been with.

1

If only I were able to click some sort of link to be able to meet with hot Catholics in my area. Oh well.

4
lemmy.world

anyone who picks at every little thing a partner or potential partner does by requiring the Internet to approve it is toxic as hell. asking the Internet if a behavior that doesn't effect you is a red flag is a massive red flag.

42
lemmy.world

TBF, if a potential partner is super excited about something you never heard of, looking into it is a good thing.

Conservatives, and other assholes, are good about hiding their crazy behind seemingly innocent things, like pepe the frog.

13

I misread that as "Where are the leftist Pope fans at?" and thought Europe, but then I realised my mistake.

1

But why would your question be "is this bad?" Just learn a little about it and decide for yourself.

1

i mean, it's more about letting the Internet decide for them. a person that is so incapable of making their own assessments that they have to ask a random mob permission to date another isn't going to be a good person to date. didn't be or date someone that would trust random Internet weirdos who collectively have an incredibly awful track record of giving advice over just talking about it or doing some reading.

1
lemy.lol

Dangit, and here I am running arch btw

Might need some therapy

9

Turns out, religious fundamentalists view men as providers and base large parts of their worth on how much money they make, whodathunk??

14

Jokes are discriminating, since nerds are autistic and don't get them.

15
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

Hey, if women get to call discrimination on every little thing they just don't like, so do I.

-8

I saw this guy scream “FIRE!!!” in a packed room once. So I decided I get to do that also!!

5
lemm.ee

Wait. Nerds being wanted in relationships is bad now? Lmfao. You nerds will never win. Wait. I’m one too? You are sure. Fuck.

8
lemm.ee

They are wanted for stability. I see you are framing it negatively though.

0
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

They fail to realize that we are also human... not only that, but we're undersexed humans.

-2
lemmy.world

What? Nah I was just thinking because most of the nerds I know have multiple partners.

5
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

You might wanna share some people from your contact list 😁.

1
lemmy.world

It’s literally any alternative lifestyle community. I’ve never lived somewhere that didn’t have board game nights for the bdsm community. Lots of polyamory and nerdiness there

2
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

Yeah, I made that one up 😁.

The weird thing is, spell check didn't underline it 🤔.

2
Notyoureply
sopuli.xyz

Yeah, I made that one up 😁.

All words are made up.

3
ktowner15reply
lemmy.world

Meh, I see it as a free 'filter' of sorts. If-you're going to judge someone's value as a life partner based on the type of phone they have, then you're probably not the type of person I'd want to be with anyway.

19

Exactly. Can you imagine dating someone that uses an iphone? 🤐

1
14th_cylonreply
lemm.ee

In a confession Aug. 21, however, Reiser said he used "the most unsophisticated chokehold that any judo instructor would completely despise you for ever using," according to a 30-page transcript obtained by The Chronicle

I probably shouldn't laugh, but.... :D

19

It’s a narcissistic attempt to diminish his culpability by saying it was a weak attack without special training.

Compare with “I barely even touched her!”

6
anonreply
lemm.ee

you may have yourself checked, you may be a dork, which is a nerd without marketable abilities

27

You're not doing work around the house.

Follow me for more insightful thoughts 👍.

15
olenkoreply
feddit.nl

You need to install Linux for the money to come.

4
lemmy.world

Okay, I'm putting together a second PC for Linux Mint, especially as I need Linux for testing.

4
jdeathreply
lemm.ee

take stuff apart and put it back together. install obscure operating systems. build a network and servers for just yourself. put multiple operating systems on the same computer. repair a broken laptop or phone. just fun things like that

2
lemmy.world

Any pointers how to get into FreeBSD? I might need that for my game engine, especially as two of the main three consoles nowadays use some heavily modified versions of it (even if unfortunately I have to provide them as closed-source addons to the engine, since neither Sony nor Nintendo don't like open sourcing their stuff).

1

Why is she even asking the question? Shouldn't she just be quiet and submit like her magic book tells her to?

27
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

Because if you're evolved enough to use Linux, you realize how shitty the human race is.

9
PlexSheepreply
infosec.pub

All my friends and family, even I myself happen to be humans. That's mean.

0

Because the distro is nothing without the kernel, the kernel is nothing without the distro, a PC is just for getting shit done of have "fun" and you should stop wasting your time on Lemmy

2

I actually know this for a fact.

Too bad for her I don't make a lot of money 🤷.

16
lemmy.today

Why wouldnt nerds cheat? :)

The logic is a bit lacking here but I guess it's some variation of that nerds would be so grateful to have a girl that they won't cheat...

20
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

And the fact that they'd rather troubleshoot Arch with a girl than anything else... and 90% of women would put up with those requests, BUT only if you make a lot of money.

5
1984reply
lemmy.today

I don't want to talk about all girls since they are different of course but for me, there is a shitload of girls that are just too fucked up to be around. They put shit in their lips or tits, they constantly focus on how they look, they have zero confidence without getting a million likes for how they look... Fuck those girls. I want a real person, not some shallow barbie with shit for brains.

2
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

Completely agree with that.

But, add the kind of society we live in where social status is measured through money and how you look, plus the overall state of IQ in the population, which is getting lower and lower, and... well, you really can't expect much else from the general population 🤷. Sure, there are exceptions, but they're so little, they're either taken or you just don't meet any of them in real life.

2
1984reply
lemmy.today

I know...i think the iq just went off the cliff in the last ten years. I guess this is end game capitalism where consumers are just shallow idiots...

2

End game or not, that is what suits most corps, thus this will only get worse and worse.

2
ludreply
lemm.ee

They are obviously joking around...

4

Jokes on them, I'm real bad with money and went into debt and destroyed my credit!

But I run proxmox for fun 😎

17
lemmy.world

Obviously the Catholic women on reddit see dating as a transaction lmao, fucking classic.

14
Persenreply
lemmy.world

Most people, no matter the religion or gender see everything as a transaction (since everything in this world revolves around money). This is what's left from the society, that's why we should all try to change the world and make it a better place.

3
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

Those are nice thoughts... sadly, that needs a social and economical order change, as well as reeducation.

4
Jarixreply
lemmy.world

I think we really just need to remove the burden of having to work yourself to death just to pay for the existence you didnt ask for.

Which is why UBI or other similar strategies are becoming popular again. Ive thought a lot about this recently and we have too large or a system that depends entirely too much on transactions of money because it is a much easier way to trade goods and services as opposed to some kind of bartering system.

But money and power corrupt everything over a long enough period of time. Massive turmoil can short circuit that as in times of crisis where values can shift greatly.

I think the systems we rely on can't really be dismantled at this point. We need to create an equilibrium before we can start that dismantling of useless,broken,restrictive,unethical, ways in which we transact with other people.

UBI should be used as the mechanism to achieve that equilibrium so that everyone can use the system. If we arent able to financially exploit people anymore than the people will be able to live for the themselves.

Not everyone will want to use that opportunity for self improvement, and we need to work to build a system that lets people not have to be a part of it while it still provides for them to live their unasked for existence in much more meaningful manner.

1
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

No, it can't be dismantled and it won't, no one will allow it. Not corps or people... especially now since we can clearly see right winged individuals and parties all over the world rise to power.

The solution is to wipe the slate clean, start from scratch, make an economy where the core values are nature and how we are tied to it, i.e. the basics are, if it doesn't do good, neither do we. I'm not a green piece advocate or anything like that. I'm just pointing out the facts - WE NEED IT TO SURVIVE! Thus, it has to be our no.1 priority, everything else is secondary.

My 2 cents...

1
Jarixreply
lemmy.world

And we have tried to clean the slate many times throughout history, but we always get back to where we are. And it will probably work, but i dont think we can until we weaken this digitally reinforced system this time. I think it needs to be broken more before we can get rid of it and the mechanism to breaking it is very simple, we the people need to use the system as much as the corpos do.

So if we keep money circulating and OUT of investment, we gain power again over finances. Maybe not enough to reverse the problems, but enough that we CAN get to a clean slate.

I think it will take a world war that changes the maps forever to happen any other way, which i think would be worse for too many people who wont survive. If this was in ukraine hasnt already shown us

1

We've never been so close to wiping ourselves out in history as we are now...

Agree on the part that we need to show how broken it is by breaking it even more. That is something that is viable as an option and might work if given enough time and people push towards it... which I think they will, since it's fairly easy and they might even profit from it... a good idea 👍.

I think it will take a world war that changes the maps forever to happen any other way, which i think would be worse for too many people who wont survive. If this was in ukraine hasnt already shown us

This is what eventually needs to happen IMO. I stopped saying this because people called me crazy, but a true clean slate is exactly this. A few million left alive, everyone else gone... unfortunately, if we even have a chance to wake up and realize what we need to survive as a species, is exactly this and nothing else. Yes, I agree, a lot of collateral damage, which could have been avoided, but god knows the signs were there... people were warned, nature warned us, everyone did... we didn't listen... let's just hope the new world order will eventually put an emphasis on values that we now see as weakness in people.

1

Anyone involved in any of these sort of groups will either cheat, leave you financially ruined or are an actual emotional vampire

13

Not being funny but when it comes to Catholic dating at least they're looking for income and not age this time 😂

12

This was addressed to ladies. Look for the post addressed to Catholic men.

4

I think exclusively dating within your particular religious demonination should be a red flag

10
explodiclereply
sh.itjust.works

Any religion is a red flag, especially Catholicism. One defective condom and your life is ruined.

13

There’s only one Catholic approved birth control method according to my Catholic education and it surprisingly isn’t not having sex (yeah not fucking your spouse from time to time is a sin, pressuring sex is a sin, but part of mutual marital duty is to have loving sex). It’s swimming in the Red Sea. Period sex is the official birth control method of the Catholic Church and the only one they approve of. Don’t want to do that or have kids, better hope you were called to a celibate order or the single laity.

3

It's more problematic when using and older thinkpad with coreboot ...

2

Sure they have a lot of money and income, but they have a lot of expenses too you know!

Like paying the continuous stream of victims of sexual assault since those pious clergymembers can't seem to stop raping children

4

For a lot of women marriage (and divorce) is all about money.

8
lemmy.world

This just hurts my brain. I don't get what "Linux" here is supposed to represent. Wealth, intelligence, fidelity, fanatical devotion to Free Software?

7
profdc9reply
lemmy.world

I find it very hard to believe that anyone vetting a spouse in such a way cares about the spouse being a nerd in and of itself.

3

Again, in the picture... apparently, they do... cuz, you know... we have money 🤣.

3

As much as I enjoy shitting on Catholics (I would hang out on a church roof pretending to be a pigeon if I could get away with it) the title of this post would be accurate with one fewer word. "Apparently, dating is all about money."

7
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

No, apparently, just using Linux MIGHT be a red flag...

But, on the other hand, some people also say that Linux nerds are cash cows, so they can't be that bad I suppose 🤷.

7

Only if he uses Linux and insists on anal as a form of contraception. 😂

3
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

Ummm, I did... if I get to be the cash cow, then honey, you shouldn't mind being the maid, a perfect mother and my personal sex slave.

-13

No it doesn't. Apparently, you can. You just have to be a nerd, make a ton of money, use Linux and hit it off with someone that agrees to live with you.

And I'm already in therapy... not doing much good unfortunately.

-1
lemmy.world

Well, I am not trying to justify the person in the post since I do not know who the person personally and what she means; but as a guy, I would also want my partner to be earning good money. You know, to raise a family.

7
0x4E4Freply
sh.itjust.works

Completely agree.

But, if I do accept an arrangement where I'm the cash cow, you better be all that I listed above.

-2
lemm.ee

What a catch. No wonder your women become feminists.

You're all pathetic excuses of "men". We used to go to war and not expect anything in return. Several decades of comfort has made ya'll soft.

-13

Us soft, lol 😂. I agree, but that goes both ways, women have gotten a lot worse than men ever did.

And then they wonder why shivery is dead, why there are no real men... well, you kinda killed the idea of all that when you started not accepting compliments (or plain out right laughing at our faces and calling us corny), seeing everything through the prism of money, started getting pissed off when men would like to treat you as equals on dates and split the bill.

Sorry, I have no respect for those types of women. Sure, there are some that are not like that at all, but they are so few, they're mostly taken.

-2
sh.itjust.works

All girls are shallow. I'd rather, "he got money" shallow than "he tall" shallow. At least one is something you can do something about. I don't know why people pretend that it is wholesome when the girl falls in love with the physically handsome tall guy, but then somehow less wholesome when the girl falls in love with a guy who through talent and hard work made something of himself.

-10