I recently was talking to a friend about my addiction to reddit and I came to understand that i feel as though I cant talk to my family about stuff. I genuinely cant sometimes because they don't understand or don't find it interesting, and to me that's ok but I can tell its becoming a problem. I'm getting emotional I don't have anywhere to go, I know online isn't good, but my parents are in there sixties, my sisters are dealing with newborns, my nieces are becoming moms and my brother is doing his own thing with his girlfriend. my friends are quickly picking up that if they don't answer or feed into what I say I wont talk and they've admitted that they cant relate to me on the level I need. my therapist has helped me somewhat put these feelings into a coherent format but now I'm left with the feeling of loneliness and anger that I simply cant point to anywhere but myself and that isn't healthy either since I've made peace with the fact that if my family wasn't around I would have shuffled off the mortal coil. So what do I do? where do I go? why cant I just not feel these emotions? why cant I be normal like all the other people in the world?

For context, me (21m) and three other friends B(21m), S(20m) and A(22m) all got together because we were all in town and had free time during the valentines day weekend. While we were refilling our snacks we talked about how relationships are going and what we got for our respective partners or hopeful partners. I didn't have any prospects in terms of romantic interest and its something I felt sore about while hearing S and B talk about the gifts they got and gave to their partners, but A started to complain that he was getting too much attention from women and that he didn't know what to do with it all. he told us that he was feeling some pressure because so many girls were approaching him and flirting with him, that caused me to get angry and insult him which triggered a verbal altercation that turned physical when I threw one of his deepest insecurities in order to win the argument. Neither of us were hurt and I left quickly after both of us were separated. now B and S are telling me to apologize which i am not willing to do.

I recognise that I overreacted and I escalated the conflict by throwing a deep insecurity that A shared with me back at him but I feel that him complaining about getting too much attention is stupid and vain, he should have kept it to himself as far as im concerned.

so recently I was invited out to the mall by my Ex-girlfriend, the outing was going to be with her friend L and L's boyfriend B. ex-gf didn't invite her current BF G because G doesn't like L in the slightest, neither does he like me because Ex-gf and I are still in touch and talk regularly. I tried to get my parents to allow me to go but they said no out of fear of B or G harming me or me harming them and getting arrested. my mom was particularly concerned about the 'optics' of the situation since It would look like a double date and three white people with on black person.

my parents asked me if I understand and I said yes to their face to just shut them up and not be bothered by more explanations, but really I don't and it makes me very angry that they are so concerned about something so minor as optics. since no one else is going to care if three white people and a black person show up to the mall together. its not that deep but they are talking about how I could get lynched and how my Ex-gf will end up 'dead with no one knowing anything' and how white people aren't to be trusted.

plus they've been pushing me to get out of the house more and 'discover my own people and what I like' but when I want to do that they wont let me! I hate it! they wanna be Helecopter parents to a damn 20 year old!

any thoughts or opinions are welcome and encouraged since I cant see my parents perspective no matter how much they try to explain it.

just a question I came up with, what would he do? could he survive long enough to begin shrinking planets ? would the necron work with him or would he be a renegade faction all to himself?

A little over a week ago I (20m) went out with my club mates to a restaurant without my parents supervision. It was the first time I ever did that and I felt very happy since i felt that i was doing something normal young adults do when they have friends. the thing is that when I was talking to my siblings and friends about their unsupervised outings with friends they were telling me that they've been doing that since they were in middle school and that I'm late to the party.

Why? why am i always late on things that other people do regularly and normally? I don't know who to blame or even if I should!who should I blame??? Myself for being too afraid to ask to go with my friends anywhere outside of school or a field trip? My parents for constantly telling me 'nothing is outside for you' when I asked to play outside as a kid? my friends for not noticing I wanted to join them? my siblings for being outdoor kids unlike me? I don't know!

I can't just help but feel like once again I'm doing something that is 'normal' but at an abnormal time. i feel like I'm left behind again in terms of development and now everyone is pushing me to go out when I was told always to not go out.

thanks for sitting through my little rant I just needed to vent again. to anyone reading this I hope you guys are doing well and wish you all the best.

So I just recently found out the slaanesh wasn't the god of excess originally but essentially the chaos god of sex in older additions. alot of her lore was focused around sex and sexual topics before GW rebranded her to be excess in all its form, which was a good thing. now I'm curious what was the lore around fulgrim's fall during this time or was it not made back then before slaanesh got rebranded?

So a few months ago I found a video about slaanesh and how her module line is pretty basic. however what he did was homebrew some slaaneshi units that could be a bit of a shakeup, the idea was that since slaanesh gains power from the excesses of the other chaos gods that there should be a little overlap between them.

For khorne the idea was these body builder warriors who take warp based steroid that make them into beasts that fight with great fury but when they aren't high on steroid their bodies are immaculate forms of muscles that look perpetually oiled. For tzeentch the idea was "an excess of knowledge" that the guys found numerous secrets that has opened their mind and allows them to discover more and more secrets that both horrifies and pleases them. for nurgle I think the idea was a unit that would brew diseases as potions that at first would feel good but them the negative effects would hit and kill them slowly.

the thing is I cant find the video and after nearly eight months of looking I'm convinced that it was a dream of mine. so if anyone has seen a video like this one on YouTube in the past then could they direct me to it or was it just me being crazy again?

I (20m) have a friend G, (19f) who I met at my college some months ago. she is very nice and kind and we both have a similar belief of things current so we mostly talk when we can on the phone or at school with plans to meet up after school is over. recently while I was cooking with my brother I mentioned I wanted to take an egg roll or two for G to try since I know that she likes Chinese food almost as much as me. my brother asks me "what has G done for you? has she brought you food?" this made me doubt everything. I've shared my food with her at lunch two times both times she liked it and mentioned she wanted to come to my house to eat. I don't know about her home situation or anything like that I do know she works at a pizza hut and makes money for school that way but other than that and that her sister likes makeup I don't know anything. I am having doubts about if I'm doing too much for someone I met not too long ago and that my efforts aren't being resciporated. I've always been raised to pay back what you are given "someone gives you 20$ you give them 30$ next week, if you can't do that don't take the money" sort of mentality. Can I get your thoughts and opinions since you guys are strangers and can approach it objectively? thanks to anyone who weighs in your opinions and thoughts are welcome.

I (20M) am currently interested in a girl named G,19F, who goes to the same college as me, we hit it off rather well and I'm trying to get to know her more. however recently she became buddies with someone I know, R(don't know his age), he is someone who I admittedly don't know too well but I can tell he wants G. he managed to get her number and the two are talking a lot and he's taking her to get food between classes. I just found this out not too long ago and I don't know what to do. I don't have a car, I don't know how to drive, I am broke constantly due to loaning out money to my family for one reason or another. I simply can't compete and it hurts too much, I can't stop thinking of the two of them together. and how much better R is than me. I'm thinking about cutting G off because of this, i feel some unhealthy amounts of aggression towards both of them and i can tell my jealousy will grow from here.