I feel like I cant talk to anyone in my family.
I recently was talking to a friend about my addiction to reddit and I came to understand that i feel as though I cant talk to my family about stuff. I genuinely cant sometimes because they don't understand or don't find it interesting, and to me that's ok but I can tell its becoming a problem. I'm getting emotional I don't have anywhere to go, I know online isn't good, but my parents are in there sixties, my sisters are dealing with newborns, my nieces are becoming moms and my brother is doing his own thing with his girlfriend. my friends are quickly picking up that if they don't answer or feed into what I say I wont talk and they've admitted that they cant relate to me on the level I need. my therapist has helped me somewhat put these feelings into a coherent format but now I'm left with the feeling of loneliness and anger that I simply cant point to anywhere but myself and that isn't healthy either since I've made peace with the fact that if my family wasn't around I would have shuffled off the mortal coil. So what do I do? where do I go? why cant I just not feel these emotions? why cant I be normal like all the other people in the world?
When you're talking to your friends in situations like this are you framing it as a venting session where they understand you're not looking for feedback or criticisms, you just want a place to air your grievance? Alternatively, are you framing it that you want to have a back-and-forth conversation with them where you're interested in their thoughts and ideas even if they don't match your own?
Semi-vent sessions, they know I'm letting out my emotions but also know I welcome feedback and other ideas. its just that the intensity and complexity of my situation and how I feel is far beyond their pay grade since we are all college students.
look into group therapy in addition to your therapist. there are clinics and programs that specialize in addiction counselling. see if you can disrupt and then change the routines you have that lead to reddit use. introduce friction by uninstalling the app, using password unlock on your phone, setting alarms, etc. consider something like a Light Phone or other minimal phone.
it'll be hard, but you can do this.