For this in fiction, I enjoyed the Mistress On Her Knees books. Though it's not the usual timid level of BDSM seen in lesbian books (a plus for me).

Ticking this a little at the edges of my relationship at the moment, my partner seems to have a talent for topping.

You can get off at your own pace, because the driver is waiting for the slagboom.

(Dutch for barrier)

Yes and no. You can skew it intentionally just like any online test BS.

But if you answer as clearly and correctly as you can? The results can be thought provoking. For example I scored highly on the "Mommy" scale, which was a surprise to me.

Then my ex got in contact with me because she needed reassurance that things were going to be OK, and it made me happy to be able to be there for her. And I had to think that, yeah, I do like mothering people, especially those who I fuck

It's more if a wrestle that I was thinking of

Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, a gay icon even before she came out

I think it's getting worse, but even my first post on Beehaw after the API exodus was followed by a big list of how I was doing everything wrong because I'm a woman.

That put me off Lemmy for a long time