How can I wear a skirt at work if I'm not religious?
Sorry for the weird question, don't know how else to word it. Basically I'm job hunting and I'm realizing the dress code is gonna be an obstacle.
I exclusively wear skirts and dresses. Not for a religion -- I'm agnostic -- but for sensory reasons. I hate pants. I hate how they feel on my legs and I haven't worn them in almost 10 years now. I understand the need to wear pants for some jobs because they're ultimately safer than a flowy skirt, but one of the jobs I've applied to is a bank. I doubt the building is a skirt deathtrap behind the scenes.
Honestly the idea of having to wear pants is so upsetting I'm breaking down over it. It's so stupid but after I finally found a way to feel comfortable when I started wearing skirts, I don't think I can go back even if the job is better than my current one.
My only idea is to get some kind of doctors note but even that seems unlikely. Hoping for other ideas here.
Skirts are fairly common formalwear, at least for women. Are you a man? If not, I think any office job, receptionist job, etc, would be fine with you wearing a skirt. I imagine it'd only be some forms of manual labour where a skirt would get in the way.
Why would a bank make you not wear a skirt?
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I don't think I have seen someone in a skirt in a customer facing role in awhile. In office not to uncommon but dresses seem more common or at least longish skirts.
honestly if the skirt goes below the knee it kinda gets filed under dress in my brain.
What kind of skirts are we talking about? Because "business formal" for women typically includes skirts.
Up until the 80s-90s, they were virtually mandatory for women. Probably still are in many countries.
Wear skirt. Go to work.
I don't know what I'm missing here. Unless there's a safety reason to the job or a mandatory uniform, why would anyone care? Maybe you're in a particularly repressive country and I don't understand the nature of the problem, or why religion comes into it.
Likely, since you didn't mention it, you don't want your gender to be an issue. That's not the world we live in. If you present as male and want to wear a skirt, the only possible option at bigger corporations is a kilt, but then you'll need to lean into being "Scottish". You might find more acceptance at a small business, even a smaller bank, perhaps, depending on where you are.
If you present as female, then I don't know what to say, I've never heard of a job that requires trousers for women apart from for safety reasons.
I present male and I wear skirts to work. The boss said the dress code was black trousers and I said I don't wear pants. Never been an issue
That said, it's totally nerve-wracking to make that stand. If an employer refuses on anything other than a safety concern then it's just bigotry, straight up.
Don't work for bigots - which can be a difficult stance to take when you don't know how you're going to make rent. People don't deserve to be put in this position, but as you say it's the world we live in
I salute you o7, the era of men in skirts is long overdue for a comeback.
Know a friend (male obviously) that likes to wear high heels when going outside their hometown.
His reason why outside: Hometown is small and no need for drama.
When I joined him I saw mixed reactions. Some took covert pictures while giggling, some looked twice and some seemed even impressed at the choice.
They were about 10cm high.
And I am not afraid of being seen with him because they look awesome!
Oooof, I know exactly what you are talking about. Wild how some people lose all decorum when they encounter someone any flavour of non-conforming out and about, right? In my case it's just how I look,no matter how I dress, I've dealt with it all my life. But honestly props to your friend for just being his authentic self, It takes courage.
I found the reactions to be quite funny.
They werent doing it in avery obvious way but I catched their glance once the noticed the foot gear and the behavior changed so I knew what they were trying to achieve when angling the phone a certain way.
Honestly if it helps promoting the takedown of bs gender society rules and normalize so everyone can wear what they like, I'm (and my mate are) all for it.
Because remember: Men wore heels originally ;)
I enjoy seeing people be different!! I admit I may stare for a second but thats because I find it interesting.
Sometimes when out with the in laws they have to whisper among themselves about how "weird" something is or outright be like "is that person gay?" And I'll say I'm not sure, it doesn't affect you, and their clothes are fabulous arent they??
Fricken old boomers man. They love to whisper among themselves at anyone who's not straight and white. Its their culture.
Given the rarity of seeing someone present as a man but wearing heels, I would probably fit into the 2nd and 3rd groups there.
In that position, I would wear a skirt in public way before heels though.
Hats off to those that choose em, but for anything longer than a twirl around the room, they look agonizing. So like 30s to a minute I guess it would just be uncomfortable, but after that I feel like my feet would implode and need therapy to work again.
There is no technical reason a man can’t wear a skirt. The society you live in may “frown” upon it. But that’s a different issue to address entirely
Modern kilts tune down the Scottishness. It can basically be a skirt. A manly man's skirt, with pockets.
Example: https://21stcenturykilts.com/kilts
Utilikilt!
But those can hardly be called skirts.
They are obviously more rugged.
I could see that going in something like an outdoor job but not at a bank or insurance corp.
They're quality garments, high fashion here in Scotland - the sort of thing a modern man would wear at his wedding rather than an old-fashioned "full Highland dress" type of kilt.
First full frame picture on the web page:
I am not looking through every product...
Why not? Too informal?
Yep.
You wont be seen in jeans at a bank.
Same for a summer dress (regardless of gender, sex or whatever)
Personally I couldnt care less but society ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Don't forget the sarong as another male alternative. Flipping great in the weather it developed in.
There's also the much less known Fijian Sulu.
Probably much harder to pull off outside of the Pacific, because it's not as well-known, but the way they wear it in Fiji can look pretty damn sleek and professional.
It's a unisex piece of clothing, too.
if a job requires pants, it's not a suitable job for you.
I don't understand what religion has to do with wearing a dress or skirt at a bank job. ?
religious dress code exemption
What religion requires people to wear dresses ?
I've never worked for an office that banned skirts or dresses.
Though one banned shorts after Labor Day.
I thought that was pointless.
Some people are large and sweaty. If they want to wear shorts in December. Why not?. Doesn't affect anyone else.
I hate stupid rules for stupid reasons.
the fundie evangelical movement considers women who wear pants as crossdressing and therefore a sin.
That's literally no where in the Bible. They just make up a bunch of b.s about anything and everything don't they ?
Like the rapture. That's also not in the Bible. Made up.
oh i get it, believe me. growing up queer in that situation was actual hell. the verse they use is the one in leviticus saying men and women shall not dress like each other, and their reasoning was that pants are mens clothing (how quaint) lol
First and only one I can think of, that would be working in a modern setting, is Pentecostal and specifically denim I think in their case.
Not sure if it's all Pentecostal or only certain sects or whatever.
If it’s an office job i doubt there will be a pants requirement. Just having clothes on …
Women wear skirts all the time where I work. No one really cares.
I don't quite get how religion plays into this but I assume you are a man and are afraid of what others might think of you if you wear a skirt instead of pants.
How about a kilt? They are somewhat accepted as male skirts.
@[email protected]
Say you are religious. Who cares. This lie doesn't hurt anyone.
Are you a lady? I work in an office at a sports company (so sporty casual is common) and there are several women here who wear dresses and skirts not pants, several more who switch back & forth. Not me - pants feel much more secure to me - but it's nothing anyone really notices.
A man wearing skirts we would notice for awhile, not care but notice; if you are customer facing then you might encounter that surprise over and over, if not, I don't think it will be a big deal.
Come to the interview and ask if it's a problem.
I am pretty sure pencil skirts (if I reference the correct clothing) arent that uncommon in office jobs.
Just keep it to professional office attire. 🤷
I am a little confused by this, maybe I just have USA brain.
I've worked office jobs for over 30 years now. No employer I've ever worked for would forbid women from wearing skirts to the office.
If there's more to the story and you're dealing with gender issues then add that information.
Might be helpful to know your gender, location (like country) and do you have autism by chance?
The first part is to taylor (lol) suggestions to you. The second part is out of curiosity and because that might be helpful to classify it as a medical necessity.
If you've been comfortably wearing skirts & dresses for 10 years, wouldn't you rrealize that skirts & dresses are perfectly acceptable attire in a bank? And if you're a man who's comfortably been wearing skirts & dresses for 10 years, how is this upcoming bank interview suddenly an obstacle? Is this your first job interview in 10 years? Here are some business-appropriate kilts: https://21stcenturykilts.com/kilts
Are you a man? Call it a kilt.
if you're leaving out a part of being an AMAB or a man or a trans woman who is hiding, there's many traditional clothes in the world that can satisfy that, most common is probably the arab thoub
have you tried different fabrics or fineness? some of them don't feel like you're wearing anything at all.
https://media.tenor.com/B9ZcEwwNw2MAAAAM/flanders-simpsons.gif
someone gifted me silk pants a while ago and that's when i finally understood flanders. lol
It depends on what job it is. I don't see a bank having a problem with it unless they have a uniform. If you were doing any field or machine work, I could see a safety issue.
Have you tried explaining to your boss the issues that pants bring you? You could word it in a way that allows you to bring up the American Disabilities Act (or whatever your country's corresponding law is, should one exist). If they still say no, ask for it in writing and tell them you'll have a lawyer look it over
Maybe in your region they are not as open minded as other places and you need to be a pioneer, my only tip is get references of other people pionering, take as much courage as you can and fight for your rights!
Even a toga is an option. It's not "normal" most places, but if you wear reasonably covering clothing and get your work done anyone worth working for won't really care.
Work from home or check the company's dress code before applying. But as most have said: if your presented gender matches the "expected" one for wearing skirts, you'll never face problems doing so, unless you want to work at a factory or something.