My chance at pedantry! Also, some black bears are brown, and some grizzlies are black. If you live in overlapping territory, it may be easier to know them by shape... but if you're close enough to discern shape, you're already in a bad spot.
Maybe, but really when you are in bear territory, and close to areas where bear congregate (rivers being one), just a few loud claps and a couple of loud "HEYS" is good enough to flush most bears.
So are polar bears considered more dangerous and aggro than grizzlies? I mean it wouldn’t be too crazy, particularly since it’s probably rare to encounter one, compare to grizzlies. But just had never really heard that.
Polar bears, because of their location, see everything as food. Black bears and grizzlies, while omnivores, are more specific.
And I feel like I have to say this to counter this weird perception online: black bears and grizzlies do not hunt humans. They generally don't like humans and will stay away. But carry bear spray.
Gotcha so the idea is they’re just gonna give it a shot and try to eat you, regardless, because the stakes, they are high?
To be fair, in a moral sense, they should absolutely try and eat every human they can get their claws on; we have done a bang up job on making their habitat and food sources disappear.
Their habitat has also shrunk so much, and their population dwindled so much, that they have gotten fairly inbred and that is causing more aggression and insanity.
There is also a female polar that keeps breeding with grizzlies, and those offspring are consistently more aggressive and dangerous.
I also heard it's because a typical polar bear has never encountered anything that moves that isn't food.
So they don't have any mental category for "moving things on the ice I should flee from" or even "moving things on the ice that isn't totally delicious".
My sister lives in Alaska. The locals say that you can tell if you're in grizzly territory by checking any bear poop you find. If it contains bells and smell like bear spray, you know there are grizzlies nearby.
When I visited Alaska, they said you should always take the sights off your rifle. That way it doesn't hurt as much when the grizzly shoves it up your ass.
But what if I was out falconing with friends, had a dinner at a super bougie steak house go late, and REALLY have to get to the airport? Surely THAT makes it less insane?
My first instinct was "small, will probably run into the nearest tree at light speed" but I did some reading and they common thought without much science behind it is that sun bear are pretty fuckin aggressive and even tho they're small, they'd still probably fuck your shit up.
Ursaring, Pangoro, and Beartic are all weak to Fighting. So, just make sure you've got your Lucario at hand and Calm Mind-ed up, and pummel them with Aura Sphere. That way, you can also keep your distance.
(Yes, I know Pangoro is a panda and not a black bear. But, uhm, uh... shut up!)
Black Bears mostly want a nice berry, or a poorly placed bear cooler.
Most Black Bear attacks seem to be because, in their mind, they're buying time for their cubs to run away.
An average Black Bear is not looking for a prolonged fight. They're still quite good at if, if they get the idea they need to.
So the prevailing wisdom, for Black Bears, is do whatever it takes to avoid them. But if attacked, do whatever it takes to make the bear think twice about whether they really want to fight. Because unlike Grizzlies and Polar Bears, a Black Bear may well change it's mind.
They will fight you back and aren't afraid... But if you're dead/they think you're dead, they probably won't bother and will continue what they were doing.
73 replies
If it’s white good night.
Who taught you to rime?
Vanilla Ice. Now stop. Collaborate and listen!
No no no, I have it on good authority that it is hammer time.
I just know that you can't touch this.
The ancient mariner did
Ice pun you got there.
Polar bears.
No thyme for that when a polar bear is on you.
Unless you're Brian Blessed.
Taught me about ice?
If it's black, panic. If it's brown, panic. If it's white, panic.
Always panic.
What if it's black and white? And what about the gray one with a bag?
ALWAYS PANIC
This video while long does a great job teaching you how to act in active bear territory.
The TLDW is: -
My chance at pedantry! Also, some black bears are brown, and some grizzlies are black. If you live in overlapping territory, it may be easier to know them by shape... but if you're close enough to discern shape, you're already in a bad spot.
I've heard the best way to tell the difference is to check your pants. If you crapped your pants it's probably a grizzly.
Great video!
https://youtu.be/1KWSJ3piSfM?t=2003
Part of me wonders if the gunshot helps whether it would be worth the trouble to carry an air horn.
Maybe, but really when you are in bear territory, and close to areas where bear congregate (rivers being one), just a few loud claps and a couple of loud "HEYS" is good enough to flush most bears.
Rhymes don't matter if it's a polar bear.
"If it's white, goodnight." is the way I learned it.
So are polar bears considered more dangerous and aggro than grizzlies? I mean it wouldn’t be too crazy, particularly since it’s probably rare to encounter one, compare to grizzlies. But just had never really heard that.
Polar bears, because of their location, see everything as food. Black bears and grizzlies, while omnivores, are more specific.
And I feel like I have to say this to counter this weird perception online: black bears and grizzlies do not hunt humans. They generally don't like humans and will stay away. But carry bear spray.
Polar bears don't find food as readily as Grizzly bears. If a Grizzly hesitates on a salmon, it'll find another salmon.
If a Polar hesitates on a penguin, it could starve.
Your point is correct, but for accuracy’s sake penguins live in the Antarctic and polar bears live in the Arctic.
So it’s really unlikely they’ll get a second one in time
That'd make penguin an exotic delicacy,
Gotcha so the idea is they’re just gonna give it a shot and try to eat you, regardless, because the stakes, they are high?
To be fair, in a moral sense, they should absolutely try and eat every human they can get their claws on; we have done a bang up job on making their habitat and food sources disappear.
Their habitat has also shrunk so much, and their population dwindled so much, that they have gotten fairly inbred and that is causing more aggression and insanity.
There is also a female polar that keeps breeding with grizzlies, and those offspring are consistently more aggressive and dangerous.
Inbreeding causing aggression.
Cross-breeding causing aggression.
Dammit biology
what do those look like? light brown but still big af?
I also heard it's because a typical polar bear has never encountered anything that moves that isn't food.
So they don't have any mental category for "moving things on the ice I should flee from" or even "moving things on the ice that isn't totally delicious".
I guess it depends on how much you smoked that day.
Brown bears and black bears see you as a potential threat.
Polar bears see you as food.
Polar bears will most likely hunt you, even if they don't immediately attack. They are terrifyingly good at it.
"I'm a magical red face bear. Come closer, i'll show you some cool trick"
My sister lives in Alaska. The locals say that you can tell if you're in grizzly territory by checking any bear poop you find. If it contains bells and smell like bear spray, you know there are grizzlies nearby.
When I visited Alaska, they said you should always take the sights off your rifle. That way it doesn't hurt as much when the grizzly shoves it up your ass.
Good thing black is all we've ever seen in our yard.
Pet it. Boop that snoot.
If you boop the snoot, will it droop?
You could try, but odds are it would run away before you could get close enough.
That only works if you have brain worms
But what if I was out falconing with friends, had a dinner at a super bougie steak house go late, and REALLY have to get to the airport? Surely THAT makes it less insane?
What do I do in event I encounter a sun bear?
This the one the women chose?
Give it a tootsie pop and see how many licks it takes to get to the center
Ask for a BJ.
My first instinct was "small, will probably run into the nearest tree at light speed" but I did some reading and they common thought without much science behind it is that sun bear are pretty fuckin aggressive and even tho they're small, they'd still probably fuck your shit up.
Lul, yes, indeed.
"The smallest bear" but still just a lewder wolverine.
And with a fancy necklace.
Ask it for head
Ursaring, Pangoro, and Beartic are all weak to Fighting. So, just make sure you've got your Lucario at hand and Calm Mind-ed up, and pummel them with Aura Sphere. That way, you can also keep your distance.
(Yes, I know Pangoro is a panda and not a black bear. But, uhm, uh... shut up!)
Strangely applies to American police, too
Edit:
upon reflection, this sounds like I think white cops are better. What I meant to say is that the white cops are just gonna shoot you so gg.
https://youtu.be/nRn-PED9w9U
https://youtu.be/t2Oe7BXncnU
If it's white, chances are I already died of hypothermia.
If it's white, try to lunge your head into the bear's mouth to make it quick.
Im so glad I'm not the only one that thought of that
Response to a bear attack depends on the type of attack, not the type of bear.
If it’s a defensive attack, play dead. If it’s a predatory attack, then fight back.
If it's a defensive attack then stop being offensive towards bears. If it's a predatory attack then start being more offensive towards bears.
What do you think would be the most offensive thing to say to a bear? Or maybe there’s a hand gesture or something that’s really taboo?
I just want to be prepared in case I ever need to know.
"Your mama was a rug!"
"Your momma is my rug"
Or possibly
"DJ Vance's couch is made out of your momma. Allegedlys"
"There's nothing but lite beer left in the cooler."
Sir, You were almost mouled to death, You are lucky You only lost one arm. Why the hell, did You try to punch that bear? I saw it in a meme once...
I read the title as "Oh beans" and somehow it still fits, lol.
Fight back? O rly?
Black Bears mostly want a nice berry, or a poorly placed bear cooler.
Most Black Bear attacks seem to be because, in their mind, they're buying time for their cubs to run away.
An average Black Bear is not looking for a prolonged fight. They're still quite good at if, if they get the idea they need to.
So the prevailing wisdom, for Black Bears, is do whatever it takes to avoid them. But if attacked, do whatever it takes to make the bear think twice about whether they really want to fight. Because unlike Grizzlies and Polar Bears, a Black Bear may well change it's mind.
Is laying down really a thing with a grizzly? What's that do?
They will fight you back and aren't afraid... But if you're dead/they think you're dead, they probably won't bother and will continue what they were doing.
Yes, they will fight to the death
https://youtu.be/v6iDtvGbIOU (Polar Bear vs Walrus Colony)
If your going into polar bear country bring along your pet walrus to protect you
So racist.
Do you even know the whites are the least privileged?
/s (but also really sad)