Meanwhile, I never even knew what an em-dash was until I started reading about AI. I always just used hyphens in the same way. Now I use em-dashes and everybody thinks I'm AI -- oh the ironing.

If you're a business owner, "the customer is always right" means you're a sensible owner. If you're a customer, "the customer is always right" means you're an asshole.

You leave useful, functional toilet paper out of this. Jeffries is basically Chthulu in a suit.

I played naked frisbee in college one time. I hadn't realized it before, but running with your nuts flopping around is fucking painful. I had to hold them with one hand which is fine when you're playing frisbee, but how the hell did men fight like that with a sword in one hand and a shield on the other arm?

The constitution isn't even legible any more since trump has wiped his ass with it so many times.

I'd prefer Raiders of the Lost Ark to The Wizard of Oz in this specific case.

neckligible

I saw what you did there.

It puts the 70 spf lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again. 15 minutes before sun exposure.

My creepiest experience was shopping at Lowe's and then getting recommendations on Amazon that night for drill bits and cabinet door handles. The thing is, I had purchased some drill bits at Lowe's so OK, but I had only stopped and looked at the cabinet door handles.

Sometimes I scan it and then click the Wikipedia link and it's almost word-for-word the same as the AI summary. "Plagiarism machine" is by far the best description of AI (LLMs, at least).

I grew up in the '70s and volunteered at the local recycling center, so I had a collection of literally every porn magazine from back then - Playboy, Penthouse, Hustler, Oui etc. etc. Multiple copies of each issue. Even weird high-quality stuff that showed actual penetration and cumshots and whatnot (big no-nos with the major publications at the time). Not a single bare bush in all of that stuff.

Instant hot cereal has completely ruined hot cereal. It's just shit compared to the regular stuff.

I had a kid on my school bus ask me what color of braces she should get.

My dentist made impression for two front crowns and sent away to have them made. Meanwhile he made two temporary crowns in-house and glued them in. They looked and felt exactly like the ones that arrived two months later. I dunno.

The endings were pretty great, at least.

Even Billy Corgan admits they were good.

No clue about Plover WI, but Kevin Love is an NBA champion and the nephew of a Beach Boy.

There's also that thing about pretending old family members aren't really dead so they can keep cashing their pension checks.

I went to a Phillies game last week and paid $20 for a beer. At least it was a 24 oz. can and at least it was so fucking cold there was ice inside it, but still.

Not one Mitch Hedberg reference ITT? I am disappoint.