I got the least serious bollocking of my life from the manager of the bar I worked in when the exec team of the bar I worked in bought me 12 jagerbombs in a single shift
Remember this scene in Ratatouille where Colette talks about the sordid pasts of the kitchen staff? Now consider that that was bowdlerized for a kids' movie, compared to reality.
Shakespeare's work has a lot of dirty jokes, they're just made with terminology modern English speakers don't know or don't realize was dirty back then.
And some of his lines are overt even to people today, like "What, with my tongue in your tail?" or when he uses a character named Bottom to make a lot of double entendres.
Ok, well, in that case, I'll take three mega bogus burgers with the twist melt nine times outta six, as well as a side of cheese fries, freaked not fried, and two cokes, one with cocaine in it the other diet, and if you could blend all that up and put it in my smoothie from this morning, I would be peaches, you crabcake dudzoltzer, you.
If you're my manager and I really like you enough to actually want to help out it's because of 4 main things:
I'm compensated appropriately
I know my extra help will be appreciated and include extra compensation
This isnt a regular occurrence and the position isnt chronically short-staffed
You bust your ass to make sure things get done before you try to pass the work on to someone else.
Without those 4 things I don't care how cool of a person you are or how great your personality is, you're a shit manager and you're doing a shit job and I'm not going to pick up your slack.
This one time I quit my job as a dishwasher by writing a note saying a family member had been raped and I needed to sort my life out. I don't know why I did that, but my God do I wanna smack my past self. I was a weird fucker. Broken too. But then again, I was the psycho dishwasher. Miracle dishwasher, sure, I got everything caught up from earlier in the day by 6pm no matter what. I'm a hard fucking worker. I had to be to survive my father. Major complexes in my psyche. But y'know, I bust my ass when I do things, and I had been contacted by the CIA pretending to be God on an acid trip, so I was consumed by the need to complete my mission, and that is how I became the 48th and 50th president of the United States. Fuck low level jobs, fucking scabootle this societal pyramid shit, bro. Ascend.
Noooo you always have to be ready to run to your minimum wage job at a moments notice even though your employer will send you out on your ass the very second the numbers start looking red!!
Agreed. I'd also expect a boss in a bind to offer extra compensation for time scheduled like that. I dont see any offers of double pay or even just time and a half. Thats undignified and disrespectful.
I know right? Imagine this minimum wage worker not dropping everything to come save the day for his manager who had poor planning and a lack of insight.
Your assumption is that the manager is being paid and treated well by the company. I promise you they are not - they are getting heat from both their leadership and employees. The manager should absolutely have empathy for their employees (and never ask for help in this way), but the fact that you can't even fathom what the manager is going through lacks of empathy just as much.
You think workers haven't tried? You think people are born jaded? The only reason I have no empathy for my manager is because of how many times they have lied to me and taken advantage of my compassion.
96 replies
Rather than "we're short staffed tonight," maybe try "Hey, want to pick up a shift tonight?" The passive aggressive tone kills me lol
Nothing wrong with asking someone if they want to work, but you've gotta be ok if they say no when they're not scheduled
The reason the manager didn’t do that is because this is a screenshot of a fake conversation.
Oh no, what happened to Buster?
He got blown up a few times, among other things. I don't think the original survived Mythbusters
A loose seal
He became a druggie unfortunately
Well, its real because I was the manager!
I don't believe you, why isn't your username 'manager' then?
alt account.
(stands on table) No, I was the manager.
But then who was phone?
The phone was Albert Einstein
Dun-dun-duuuuunlunlunlunlun
I have had similar conversations with managers in the past, this may be staged but it's all too real.
i thought that was obvious. I mean the contact name is "manager"... isn't the point that people wish they would respond like this?
You've never saved contacts like that?
not for people I know. it's stupid. it's not like "mom". I'm not putting down relationships that can change at any time.
You know what's going to be asked next, so here's the response:
"Sorry homie, I've been drinking"
In my restaurant there's a four drink minimum before you can start cooking or serving customers.
I got the least serious bollocking of my life from the manager of the bar I worked in when the exec team of the bar I worked in bought me 12 jagerbombs in a single shift
How much coke was involved?
for us plebs sadly none
12 jagerbombs and no coke is a war crime.
And no maximum?
Most people find their own maximum.
Some find it and just leave it faaaar behind them
Remember this scene in Ratatouille where Colette talks about the sordid pasts of the kitchen staff? Now consider that that was bowdlerized for a kids' movie, compared to reality.
TIL "bowdlerize" https://www.englishgrammar.org/bowdlerize-means-sanitize-book/
what a prude, that Thomas Bowdler. Shakespeare was too spicy for him!
Shakespeare's work has a lot of dirty jokes, they're just made with terminology modern English speakers don't know or don't realize was dirty back then.
And some of his lines are overt even to people today, like "What, with my tongue in your tail?" or when he uses a character named Bottom to make a lot of double entendres.
In my restaurant, I make all my female employees withstand uncomfortable sexual advances from me. I have lawsuits out the ass!
Sounds like you should go to jail.
Nah, I'm allowed to do this, write funny comments on the internet, because I am the police, retard
Your credentials check out continue on.
Ok, well, in that case, I'll take three mega bogus burgers with the twist melt nine times outta six, as well as a side of cheese fries, freaked not fried, and two cokes, one with cocaine in it the other diet, and if you could blend all that up and put it in my smoothie from this morning, I would be peaches, you crabcake dudzoltzer, you.
Would you like a side of sexual harassment to go with that?
Actually used this once, and it wasn't a lie or stretching the truth
Good call, never lie to your boss. Crack open a cold one as soon as the first text comes in
After. Just been drinking after.
"My grandma died.."
"My grandma's been drinking, gotta keep an eye on her."
"I'm my grandma's tripsitter tonight."
At my wife's union job, if they are understaffed, they send a text blast needing more folks.
And here's where it gets awesome. They bid. Sometimes it's a flat extra $100-500. Other times, it's DOUBLE your hour wage.
Unions are pretty awesome.
😎
Hell Yeah, Unions FTW!
That's how it should work for all shifts IMO.
Youre a manager. manage to get your ass in there
✏️ downvoted by a manager apparently
lol, who let a manager onto the the fediverse?!
Gotta get that instance mass-defederated ASAP before we have a problem.
don't do that, just add them to a shadowban list maintained by an out-of-touch psychopath.
The only way to deal with unwanted fediverse users
This is how we end up short-staffed
If the manager is out on the floor doing work, then who is manning the office and sipping drinks?
At work, I don’t appreciate implications. It leads to mistakes and misunderstandings. Bad for business.
"Will no one rid me of this turbulent line cook?!"
The … always gets me
Yep, the text is great, but that's the punchline.
That is the sign of incoming disaster.
It really bugs me that they spell good luck as a single word.
It's because they've been drinking
Twice
The proper thought to have when an employer says they're short staffed is "Why didn't you hire enough people?" not "Gee, I should chip in!"
"If you have time to text me you have time to work"
Or you could just not reply.
That’s what I’ve always done, wait until the shift is nearly over and be like “just saw this, hope it all worked out!”
Yesss, “sorry I just woke up! Did you manage to find someone?”
"Holy cow, well, good thing you're a manager! Manage it."
Sucks to be you. (Unless I really like you.)
If you're my manager and I really like you enough to actually want to help out it's because of 4 main things:
Without those 4 things I don't care how cool of a person you are or how great your personality is, you're a shit manager and you're doing a shit job and I'm not going to pick up your slack.
(And the extra hours would give overtime)
Lucky for me I'm too poor to have a phone number anymore!
I was a retail manager when my mom told me she had cancer I said “I don’t know what to say… except… you’re still coming in tho right “
This one time I quit my job as a dishwasher by writing a note saying a family member had been raped and I needed to sort my life out. I don't know why I did that, but my God do I wanna smack my past self. I was a weird fucker. Broken too. But then again, I was the psycho dishwasher. Miracle dishwasher, sure, I got everything caught up from earlier in the day by 6pm no matter what. I'm a hard fucking worker. I had to be to survive my father. Major complexes in my psyche. But y'know, I bust my ass when I do things, and I had been contacted by the CIA pretending to be God on an acid trip, so I was consumed by the need to complete my mission, and that is how I became the 48th and 50th president of the United States. Fuck low level jobs, fucking scabootle this societal pyramid shit, bro. Ascend.
Then general lack of empathy on both sides is astounding.
I don't think not volunteering to come in on your day off when your boss hasn't even asked you to do so yet indicates a "lack of empathy."
Noooo you always have to be ready to run to your minimum wage job at a moments notice even though your employer will send you out on your ass the very second the numbers start looking red!!
Nobody wants to work anymore a bloo bloo bloo!!1
ikr the worker is literally showing empathy. Personally I wouldn't even have answered the text unless I needed the money.
They didn't say that. But it might be empathetic to interpret their message in the obvious way and say, "I can't cover".
But that would require this not to be a fake screenshot made up as a joke, because it would ruin the joke.
Agreed. I'd also expect a boss in a bind to offer extra compensation for time scheduled like that. I dont see any offers of double pay or even just time and a half. Thats undignified and disrespectful.
I know right? Imagine this minimum wage worker not dropping everything to come save the day for his manager who had poor planning and a lack of insight.
Your assumption is that the manager is being paid and treated well by the company. I promise you they are not - they are getting heat from both their leadership and employees. The manager should absolutely have empathy for their employees (and never ask for help in this way), but the fact that you can't even fathom what the manager is going through lacks of empathy just as much.
Hard to give empathy to someone you never receive it from.
IKR, hense my first comment.
Then why is the lack of empathy astounding?
Touche. People are generally pretty shitty - especially to each other.
You think workers haven't tried? You think people are born jaded? The only reason I have no empathy for my manager is because of how many times they have lied to me and taken advantage of my compassion.
Ok, your situation sounds earned.
But generally it goes both ways, you don't think managers are jaded from being burned by shitty workers?
My point is that everyone, on all sides, could benefit from seeing each other as a bit more human.
It's because bad managers are so common. There's a saying that goes "people don't quit jobs, they quit managers", that's how common it is.
Wishing someone good luck is a show of empathy, not a lack thereof.
Yeah they could have wrote, "LMAO SUCKS TO SUCK"
That is right! They are family and family help each other..