How does this scam work?
My recently widowed father (72) is planning a trip across the country to meet a woman who he claims called him by accident and with whom he has since built a romantic (remote) relationship. Here's what he's shared with me:
- He received a "wrong number" call from a woman that led to a number of other conversations online and on the phone that started to take on a romantic tone.
- He believes she is real because he has checked her out online, including validating that she is indeed the CEO of her company, is 40 years old, and is originally from Taiwan. Haven't seen this myself.
- She says she runs this company with her brother in Canada and her father back in Taiwan. The details of the company were not clear to me.
- They have exchanged photos but not video because her webcam is not working.
- He is planning a trip to Los Angeles (from the East Coast of US) in a few months to meet her in person. She said her driver will pick him up at the airport.
- No money has been asked for or sent, according to him.
This is obviously a scam, right? But, without there being an ask for money I can't figure out the angle and haven't been able to convince him to disengage.
It is either going to be an ask for money to help her overseas family or a "can't lose" investment in her company. I'm guessing she'll back out of the travel plans last minute so they never meet OR he's going go there and have his organs harvested.
Does anyone recognize this scam? What should we expect next? Has anyone else successfully talked their elderly loved ones out of one of these?
It's a pig butchering scam. She won't ever ask for money, she will just start drip-feeding "investment advice" that will typically direct him to an app in the Google Play Store (or Apple App Store) that is a full on fraud. Yes, they have complete scam/fraud apps in the legitimate app stores that look like legitimate investment apps (but sure Google, you have to block side-loading to keep your customer's safe - fucking frauds all the way down...).
Your dad might already be on the hook for thousands thinking he is investing and making a huge return. The victim doesn't know they are in deep until they try to pull the money out and find out it doesn't actually exist. None of it. Not their "profit". Not their original "investments". He doesn't think it's a scam because he didn't send her any money. He just thinks his new friend (or girlfriend) is giving him tips and he is investing with a "trusted" app from a "trusted" source - after all it is on the app store.
Get your dad watching Kitboga. Show him the Last Week Tonight segment on pig butchering scams (it's on youtube). I don't know what else to do, I don't know if there are any legal avenues that can help or not, unfortunately, until he knows he is being scammed. If the idea that a 40 year old CEO absolute smoke-show woman wants to DATE a 72 year old widower retiree isn't sending enough red flags to make him keep his walls up, it's going to be a hard battle to convince him.
If she's CEO of a company, she can afford a fifty quid webcam to plug into her PC.
Never mind all the other red flags.
No one has a broken webcam in 2026. Especially if ahes supposedly a company CEO, like that is a solved-today problem if it was ever true.
Also unless your dad is also loaded, there’s not a ton of incentive for a successful woman in her early forties to start a romance with someone nearly twice her age, I mean that may sound awful but I’m a woman and that’s just pragmatic. A long distance gamble on a set of old balls? If she’s just in to older men, I’m sure there are plenty in a 10 minute vicinity, she doesn’t need to fw men on the other side of the country.
May I be as delusional in my 70s to believe I can still pull a 40 year old for reasons that have nothing to do with money
That “company” is the key part of the scam here. Your father will be asked to invest money in it for various reasons. Whether they’ll go for the “it’s a great deal” or “help me Obi Wan” angle is dependent on the mark.
Others mentioned it, but this is a clear pig butcher attempt. I get them through text about twice a year. As soon as I politely ask them if they're trying to perform a pig butcher or ir they know what one is, they usually shut up.
Your father will lose everything if you can't convince him of this.
Lots of good info already, so I'll just leave a look to a good podcast episode on pig butchering scams.
https://darknetdiaries.com/transcript/141/
Have him reach out to her through the publicly posted channels, not through the contact info “she” has given him. The real CEO lady will tell him that the scammer he’s talking to is just impersonating her.
That's a good solution, assuming she is a real person being impersonated and not entirely fabricated.
It's easier to scam someone again rather than convince them they're being scammed.
Hold on, I think you may be on to a solution here... We just have to figure out a way to 'scam' these people in a way that cancels out the original scam and prevents / does no further harm.
Just throwing this out there. Maybe a good technique would be for OP to show his dad that he also gets these messages “whoops wrong number! By the way I’m an attractive foreign woman 20% younger than you, want to chat?”
I get these at least 3-4 of these a week. Surely seeing how common this is would make it clear, right?
This is definitely a scam, though I'm also confused by your dad traveling, usually that's other way around (and that's where "complications" happen where money is "needed").
Try to tell your dad what you expect coming - there will be complications and she will ask for money. Likely only a little at first, but the number will be rising.
Also, since they are impersonating (or acting like) a public figure, try searchig for the name online. Your dad is likely not the first (or last) that fell for this particular scam. Other people might be sharing stories with this person. There might be messages shared that people exchanged with the scammer - these will likely match those sent to your dad (the scammers usually have multiple people going at the same time). Use that - if your dad reads on the internet the exact message he got from his love interest, that hopefuly will ring some alarm bells. Though in the age of AI this might not be the case anymore, it's worth a shot.
Talk with your dad, ask how things are going and try to be vigilant for money being asked for. Try to poke holes in the stories but be gentle so your dad doesn't shut you out - he will likely not be that willing to listen. One way or another he will get hurt - you can just minimize the financial damage - or limit it to emotional only.
Good luck.
Organs or rapture ?
She’s probably going to say her car/something broke down and she needs money ASAP to meet him.
Also, lol @ CEO of a company that doesn’t have any device with a working camera…
This alone is enough honestly.
Every cell phone for the last 10+ years has a front facing camera and internet connection.
Last time I saw that happen, it took all of 30 seconds to walk one office over and appropriate that laptop
Some variety of a so-called Pig Butchering Scam.
^^ This. here's a bit of the show Last Week Tonight going over how the scam works: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pLPpl2ISKTg
John Oliver deserves a Congressional Gold Medal in recognition for all of his work. He has made a point of not only reporting on, but actively antagonizing, bad people in positions of power and bad corporations. And he's managed to be quite funny while doing it. The man is a national treasure.
Appreciate this. Seems right on the money.
Have him watch this!
Oddly enough, I got into a real relationship with a woman who texted me when she had the wrong number. She lived about 180 miles away in the city I grew up in. We were meeting up every week for quite a while.
No organs will be harvested: he's too old for that. But it doesn't mean he won't be butchered: he will be butchered like a pig
The meeting will be called off last minute and it will either be a shady investment or ill father in South Asia.
It is utterly important for you to stay with him and plan this through, as it seems like he already trusts the scammer more than you. You are losing him.
Likely she will cancel the trip at the last second and claim to have a work or family emergency. Then she will need money.
Or shortly before the trip she will share an investment opportunity and offer him to join her in it. It will turn out to be fake.
Or both.
Hey now. There's also the "lure someone to a remote location, kidnap him, and beat him up until he transfers you a bunch of money".
That's very unlikely. These romance/pig butchering scammers operate from outside the USA and have no interest in attracting the kind of attention such an attack would bring.
Planning the trip is almost certainly to build trust and make the relationship seem real. All with the goal that the target willingly gives the scammer the money. If he goes to Los Angeles after she cancels, there will be no driver to pick him up.
Not as unlikely as you'd like to think
No, its extremely unlikely.
The good ol' wrench attack, so versatile!
Being the CEO of a company and not having a working webcam seems like a dead straight no-brainer giveaway that this is a scam. I mean, you know... a CEO who can't do video Zoom meetings? Come on.
So he's flying to LA to be taken who knows where alone in a car with her driver? Dude NO, absolutely NOT. Please talk your dad out of this, srsly.
Just in case he needs some more red flags
sounds like https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pig_butchering_scam it's in early phase so far
Man, if I had a nickel for every time I saw this:
Wrong number ✅
Beautiful Asian woman living in LA ✅
Owns her own business, jewelry/fashion design/finance ✅
Mysteriously keeps the conversation going even when told it's a wrong number ✅
Tries a romance angle to suck you in to a crypto "investment" in 3-2-1...
Typically run out of boiler room call centers in Myanmar using, essentially, slave labor:
https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c2d3w90x86po
He did mention specifically she was "oriental" as if it was some kind of check in the "not a scam" column.
Not sure the link there... Is it a known thing that old men have a weak spot for women of Asian heritage?
It helps explain why their English isn’t great. The guy behind the profile is likely in Southeast Asia, so it explains when he slips up with some phrase from that region.
I don't know about "weak spot" but there is a certain fetishization of Asian women they may be leaning in to.
https://yellowchaircollective.com/the-cultural-and-historic-roots-of-the-fetishization-of-asian-women/
One of my uncle is currently involved in scams like this one with multiple women at the same time. They all love him, they all want his money. Last time I checked, he lost most of his money and almost became homeless.
I hope you can do anything to your father because he will lose a lot.
that's awesome, that he's stringing them along and wasting their time
oh... :/
Among your other points, a wealthy 40 year old CEO looking for romance is going to pick a guy below her age, not one who's 72.
Pretty sure the only organ they'll harvest is his wallet but they can cut pretty deep financially, and break his heart.
Know any real women who might make a better match for him?
I think this is part of the problem. He doesn't have a strong social circle and most of what it had been had been her friends, now mostly lost. He's still pretty healthy but has other life situations keeping him trapped in place. Figuring out how to get him out of the house might be a good next step, once we can break him of this.
I recommend to work on this certain problem.
Day trip, vacation, whatever.... But he really needs it, as this story has clearly shown.
oh dude i have a surprise for you
people don't just want to fuck folk younger than them
Okay I'll include her own age and maaaaybe up to 10 years older. But anyone aiming 30+ years older than themselves probably has a financial motive.
"her driver" will be a white van
Yes it's a scam. Likely there will be money requests forthcoming.
A lot of people mentioned the broken webcam as evidence of the scam. I would add that modern AI tools can deepfake a video stream, apparently this already happens in other tech scams where the scammers immitate real people that have a LinkedIn account and existing online presence.
And because her web cam doesn’t work, she might have use Linux.
Just as
NostradamusJamiroquai predictedScamming old people has grown into a massive and well organized industry that brings in billions in profits per year. It is a huge problem that has continued to get worse. As others have said, this is 100% a scam. They will inevitably use any number of techniques to extract money from him. It is very possible they already have and he just hasn't told you yet, it is not uncommon for the victims to be secretive about what the scammers are getting them to do.
Yeah, OP's dad has probably already gotten instructions to hide anything problematic.
This is a scam. 1000%. Do what you gotta do to stop it.
My dad is on his third one of these. The first one eventually said she could help him buy Bitcoin at which point he realized it was probably a scam and stopped talking to her. I can't remember what happened with the second, but the third invited him out to the west coast so he could drive her fancy super car. I'm guessing before it gets that far she'll bring up money and he'll realize it's a scam again.
I'm not too worried about my dad yet because he doesn't get too invested in the whole thing and isn't one to send money to people, but I plan on bringing it up if he ever brings up sending money to, or visiting one.
Yep. My grandpa has lost everything after my grandma passed away. So many young women want him! And he could make so much money if he just buys some supplies! And this and that and scam scam scam.
I'd feel bad for him if he hadn't disrespected the memory of my grandmother so damn quickly after being sucked into these scams.
Christ, I got solicited by my fucking cab driver to buy Bitcoin. These people are everywhere. They're constantly dangling "I can hook you up" bait in front of anyone who will listen. It's downright suffocating.
lol
If he knew some secret technique to making lots of money with Bitcoin, he wouldn't be a fucking cab driver, now would he?
https://www.pitzlfinancial.com/blog/ode-shoeshine-boy
"In 1929, at the height of an economic boom in America, Joseph Kennedy Sr. (father of JFK) was working as a stockbroker on Wall Street. As the story goes, Joseph was walking around when he decided to sit down for a shoeshine. While polishing his shoes, the young worker gave Joseph some of his favorite stock picks. When Joseph heard the shoeshine boy giving out stock tips, he figured the party was about to end, and it was time to get out of the market. Joseph proceeded to exit his positions in the market and bought short positions that bet on the market going down.
Shortly after that, the stock market entered a free fall. On Monday, October 28, 1929, the market dropped about 13%. The next day it fell another 12%. These became better known as Black Monday and Black Tuesday, and ushered the United States into The Great Depression.
Now did Joseph profit from this type of bet? Absolutely. It's estimated that he made somewhere north of $150 million during that period, which equates to roughly $3.5 billion in today’s dollars.
Did he make these bets based on the shoeshine boy? Probably not, but it makes for a good narrative."
Joe Kennedy was famously a booze smuggler who profited most handsomely from black market liquor imports during Prohibition.
I'm sure he made some savvy stock trades in his day, but the seed of his fortune was the illicit sale of alcohol.
I think these (largely apocryphal) stories overlook how shoeshine boys have been giving stock tips during rain and shine for centuries. I wish it was the sign of a peak, but it's more the continuation of an enduring trend.
Good opportunity for him to say he doesn’t have the money right now, can she buy him the plane tickets and get himself a nice little free trip to LA. She’ll obviously say no, and boom he’s out of it.
He won’t want to get out of it.
But this particular method might get him to realize "she" wouldn't spend a dime on him, and that might raise some doubts...
OP here. This is part of my issue with this whole situation. He's not a dumb guy. He knows better. Or knew better. Always been good with money, always had a cynical view of any institution (correctly, as it turns out). In addition to figuring out how to get him out of this I need to come to grips with the fact he's not the same man who I knew.
Scams work for a reason. More often than not, it's a right place right time thing. I consider myself a pretty smart guy too, but I remember a few years back I gave my ssn to someone running the "you're about to be arrested" scam. Realized it before I gave them money, and ssns are all leaked by now already (freeze your credit)...but that was a bit of a wakeup call (heh).
I was tired after a long day, I was annoyed, and I'd had a few beers at that point. I was in a susceptible mindset when the phone rang. It happens. Scams are designed to short circuit your thinking, and with some scams being "smart" makes you more susceptible. It's a question of experience.
I know that 23 yr old cosplay models that love videogames and want me to rate their new bikini for some design aren't adding me on discord...but if it was my first day on discord, I might think that's normal.
Edit: actually I think this might be the approach you should take--make it very clear that you don't think any less of him, because this happens to everyone. Falling for a scam doesn't make you dumb, it's a learning experience. Many people that fall for scams keep giving up cash because they feel stupid and ashamed, don't make him feel stupid and ashamed.
Yep. When the mark turns the tables and becomes the one with the "broken wing" it changes everything.
It's a great way to smoke out people in your life who take up a great deal of your own time and resources, like this scammer, but do not actually give a shit about you: when you are unable to do for them as usual because now it's your own wing that's broken, and could they step up and carry their own weight right now, they clear out entirely and wait to come back when they think you're ready to give again.
In 2026 that's the most obvious sign it's a scam. However even these days you can have live AI visual and audio filters.
Especially if this is a CEO
I have never encountered someone who said this that wasn’t lying to me.
old people at work. usually they haven't plugged it in or they can't figure out how to click the button that says "start video" or it's pointing at the ceiling
Deepfakes combined with a romance scam. Pretend to be someone with a legitimate background that you father can verify himself, legitimised with synthetic images and voice (video isn't quite there in terms of reliable quality, so they stick to static images), some of which will even contain current dates/events and even his name written out, all to make it seem like a real person.
The scammer is playing the long con, building a relationship and slowly working towards a situation where your father wants to give them money, or even slips up and provides them with some sort of access to his accounts. It's not going to be sudden or obvious. They may not even ask directly, but craft a scenario where your father offers himself.
https://youtu.be/srr0rRgF2Fw
https://youtu.be/ACijyfS3ya4
@[email protected] what about check out the registration of that company at Taiwan with official site? https://gcis.nat.gov.tw/mainNew/
The company is real. The person the dad is talking to isn’t the real CEO. The public presence will all check out. If the dad can validate that publicly, the scammer found the info publicly and is just an imposter.
Here's the thing: Even if she could do a video call, that doesn't really prove anything.
Having said that, she's 40 and she's a CEO. If her "webcam is not working" she has the means to rectify that quickly. Not to mention, there's basically no chance a 40 year old CEO of an international organization doesn't have a phone that can do video calls, let alone no laptop/device capable of it. It's pretty much going to be essential for that type of job. She'd buy a new laptop, new phone, get the existing stuff fixed.
Yes it's a scam. There are many variations of how these work and there's not always a one size fits all script. They'll say whatever it takes and it could be anything.
Some will ask for money directly. Some will lure the target into crypto scams. This general type of romance scam typically involves building trust over time, and then suddenly concocting an urgent situation requiring money. The idea is that they need help ASAP, and if the target doesn't act quickly, the scam artist is going to be in a lot of danger/trouble. For instance, she might claim that she traveled abroad and something happened (ex: lost passport, stolen purse) that requires lots of money now. Or maybe because she's stuck in another country without ID, she needs someone in the USA (your dad) to cover some bogus financial transaction for the company or they will face big fines/bankruptcy/lose the biggest client/etc.
Also, people who are being scammed often lie about whether or not they've sent money. Deep down they know they may suspect they've been taken advantage of and feel embarrassed/ashamed about it. Even people that you feel 100% would never lie to you about that, will lie about that up to a point.
Your Dad's a moron and probably a "whale" in scammer databases.
It is hard to defend his behavior, certainly. But I think I'm coming to grips with the toll aging takes on people. The man who raised me was no idiot. But this frail, lonely, isolated person is not who he used to be.
There's a reason these scams target who they target.
Loneliness is difficult to deal with, especially if you used to be married and are at an age where new people don't come easy any more.
One of the "death bed confessions" of my granddad was that he regretted never re-marrying.
You are to be applauded for watching out and caring for your father - I”m sorry for both of your loss of your dear mother and I know, you are hurting as much as he is…
You will have to tread carefully, depending upon his level of dementia -since he firmly believes this scam and will not respond well to being told he’s wrong and trying to convince him
The best approach will be to gather some solid empirical evidence on paper - do your research on everything you can get about the company - look at the company website suspiciously (source code) - everything you can find with her name, her phone number, the company address (on Google maps) etc…
be sure to do this research anywhere other than social media, everything on social media will support her story/lies - It will take some work, but will be worth it for when you talk to him
Once you have the evidence in hand and are ready to talk with your father, began by telling him how much you love him and care for him and will do anything to protect him - make sure it’s all about him and not money -
Then you can show him the evidence and help ease his way to understanding-
This is all a part of his grieving the loss of his life partner, and trying to ease his own pain
I wish you well in taking care of your father, please DM me and tell me how it went
(Source: an elderly man who went through much of the same with his elderly father)
fwiw sometimes the people playing the "bait" are themselves victims of human trafficking. If they don't bring in enough money, they are forced into prostitution. source.
I've seen this scam a lot on Tinder.
I'm not sure what the goal really is, but it is most definitely a scam. At some point, they will ask for his identity to be verified through a PAID SERVICE. The scam is either to get people using the service or is to get your credit card info through a phony service site; IDK beyond that, as the moment they had asked for that shit I block and report them and I've come to recognize the bullshit before it gets that far now.
It can be days, weeks, even MONTHS before they actually ask you to spend money. That's what makes these scams so fucked up; they often seem like genuine people for a long period of time before suddenly switching gears.
You should start asking for money. Just $50 see what happens.
I know someone who seems to be addicted to meeting people online and they just pretend to be broke once they’re tired of the attention, ask for money, and the person disappears.
A lot of the comments are about the scam and not about what you should do to help your father.
Make him aware that it's a "romance scam" and that this was set up from the beginning for money. Tell him what to expect and hopefully when this person finally starts with the money requests he will remember what you said and understand for himself what is happening.
Second, the biggest concern would be his inability to get out of the situation and feeling pressured in the moment to give an answer or send money. I don't specifically have a recommendation for how he can avoid this, but generally it's best if people have their own transportation and can leave at any time.
Also, I would stay in touch with him frequently. He is interacting with this person. Talk on the phone several times a day. It's going to be impossible for him to walk away unless you can help him.
Edit: typo
Hand off the information to Kitboga so he can make some videos about it.
LA is relatively close to the Mexican border.
Nobody's interested in a 72 year old's organs.
I'd be most worried that it's a kidnapping for ransom, since seniors generally have savings and retirement assets, since they'd be alone with strangers in unknown territory.
These scams can get fairly complex. Sometimes they even employ models to video chat to make the whole thing seem legitimate.
Sometimes these are people who are trapped inside of a compound where they can't leave unless they scam enough victims.
Jim Browning gives us a behind the scenes view on how these work: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vu-Y1h9rTUs
Skipping ahead to 4 minutes will show how they typically use the call/text by "accident" method.
Another good video here by Pleasant Green: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DS1ge8-31IY
Or... Hear me out. Maybe, just maybe this lonely, beautiful, youthful 40 something CEO, who can't dial a phone number really IS in love with your 72 year old dad. I mean stranger things have happened. Either way, this could be fun.
You know... Just a thought.
If only your clarity of thought could be conveyed effectively to him.
There is a 0.001% chance this isn't a scam. Make sure he doesn't give money and has backup plans of what he would do in LA if this is a scam. If you are going to LA anyway then meeting someone can make it more enjoyable. If it doesn't work out (either a scam or real but the don't click) he can enjoy his backup plan. I want to visit the USS Iowa there someday as one example of something to fill a day. I assure you there is more and I've not even been there
I think you vastly overestimate the chance this isn't a scam.
Your dad is a horny dog trying to date someone over 30 years younger than him.
If it's none of the above could be a marriage / immigration thing. Met a dude once who had married like six times. Would find needy women with money, woo them, divorce them and then collect.
I'm sorry to hear that your extremely stupid father is about to lose the family a lot of money that could have gone toward important things because he's too stupid to set his loneliness aside for 5 seconds and look up this very common scam. My condolences.
Whoever's downvoting me wants your family to become worse off than it is.