And everyone is trying to muddle through, including your heroes. I think it's good to keep this in mind; both to avoid feeling inferior for not having your shit figured out (because nobody has) and to be tolerant of people making mistakes – nobody's perfect and everyone has issues besides getting your order exactly right.
Save as much as you can… but don’t skimp out on quality of life.
Too many people I’ve see pinch pennies to save only to end up dead or in a place that couldn’t enjoy it. Make sure to take time out for yourself while you can before it’s too late
Basically mine would be “all things in moderation”
Obviously, making time for yourself is a good thing. If you’re miserable, there isn’t much point!
I guess this is more a consequence of my living in a very consumer-oriented society that the importance of saving is so prevalent. Plenty of fun can be had for little to no money.
The people who call you girly are idiots. Having said that, there's absolutely nothing wrong with being girly. I much prefer that to toxic masculinity.
Get a fire ladder if you're not living on the first floor
But seriously, learning to use a fire extinguisher needs to be emphasized more. I stopped a fire from becoming serious because I was trained to use a fire extinguisher and I put out the fire quickly. My partner didn't know what to do and she just handed the fire extinguisher to me. If she were there alone, the building could have burnt down. Or at minimum, all of our possessions could have been damaged.
Don't do drugs. But if you're going to do drugs avoid anything you have to inject with needles. There are plenty of fun things you can smoke, eat or snort.
I was told on my way to college to stick to natural stuff, and only with people I absolutely trust. I know there are plenty of natural drugs that can kill you quickly, dad was just trying to make it easy. I guess he figured I’d never see shrooms. At an A&M school. Surrounded by cow pastures. Anywho…
In my youth I thought I was old enough to try some stuff. I was not. Now that I’m older, I still think lots of drugs should be legalized, but I think 25 is maybe a good age. Let the brain finish developing before you start killing off the slow cells!
Yeah, very few people can do opiates recreationally without addiction. Same goes for tobacco. Meth will fuck you one way or another (if you have adhd it may help while being a rough version of the treatment and basically guaranteeing you can't get the helpful stuff if a doctor finds out).
Stimulants don't make you smarter, but they do make you more confident, this is a dangerous combination.
Research every drug before you put it in your body, know the risks and be comfortable with them. And check drug interactions online with every recreational drug you're taking with each other and with your prescriptions. Lots of drugs have interactions both positive and negative with each other and while sometimes that's a uniquely good time or a particular perspective, more often than you think there's a risk of serotonin sickness
Unless your speed or skag are prescribed, and even then, take as little as possible to make you comfortable. Never up your dose, not even once, without checking in with a professional first.
Strengthen your core. Lower back pain in your mid-30s is a bitch. Also, take care of your teeth and floss everyday. Start investing early. Any amount you can set aside, no matter how small, will payoff if you start early.
Let's say you're a student and poor. You live cheaply, eat ramen every day, etc.
Now you get your first real job. The amount of money at first will seem crazy. There will be the temptation to just splurge, buy watches, fancy apartment, fancy car on loan, etc. This happens every time your income increases significantly.
Now let's say you get fired. Suddenly you have the loans, the bigger apartment, etc but no way to pay for it. This will be very stressful and you may have to do things you don't want to.
Imagine instead you didn't have the car. You got a modest apartment, and saved some money. You have no debts, and can easily take half a year to get a new job no stress.
So when I say live below your means, I mean do not give in to the temptation to splurge. Spend less money than you make.
Try to put at least 30% or so of your income to the side (aim for 50%). Make an emergency fund of at least 3 months worth of expenses. Then start putting money into tax-deductible retirement funds and ETFs.
Most importantly, never take loans and keep monthly expenses like subscriptions to a minimum.
Yeah, I need to comment that no one should be using BetterHelp or the like, if you care about your personal and/or sensitive data being stolen in a breach. BetterHelp already had privacy issues that came to light. 123
Yeah, never feel like it's too late to start something. There's stuff (learning an instrument, language, craft stuff) I considered getting into in my 30s but felt like it was too late. Now I'm 40 and I've started and I wish I'd done it ten years ago, because I'd be so much further ahead.
Let go of any fear of others expectations for you as soon as you can. Explore what interests you and don’t let others stop you. People come and go, but they’ll come to you faster than they leave if you’re a confident and passionate person. You can only be that if you work on figuring out how you want to live and chase that life.
Stay away from gambling sites. If you’ve got extra money and want to watch it grow, invest in Exchange Traded Funds (ETFs) with a low/no fee trading account. Stay away from meme stocks as well.
If you do invest, diversify your portfolio. SPY is very exciting but it’s heavily tied up in the AI bubble. Try to more international markets, clean energy, minerals, heavy industry. No matter what happens to the AI companies, we still need energy and resources to build stuff and keep our economy going.
Read about taxable and non taxable trading accounts in your country. Try to use those to avoid having your savings eroded by taxes. You will pay plenty of taxes on your income, so don’t worry about that!
The biggest advice I can give you is, you need to try to be social. It's easy to hang out with friends in high school because everyone's locked into the same building every weekday for 6 hours.
Once you're an adult, you no longer have that limitation. Even college is more of a "go to class for 2 hours a day then leave afterwards" type of experience. It's certainly liberating to not be forced to be someplace for long periods of time, but it also means that the primary reason that you hang out with your friends (ie, because they're already there with you) is now gone. It can make for a very lonely experience.
You need to go out of your way and actively maintain your friendships. Make plans to meet up at least once a week or something. Otherwise, you won't really get another chance to make deep friendships
Yeah in college I experienced both extremes. I spent about a year and a half completely isolated, just traveling between classes and my dorm. It was self destructive and my grades and mental health suffered. Then I made some life changes and started going to clubs and events and made friends and suddenly it was easier to study even though I had less time. I became extremely social and found myself spending nights doing everything from deep discussions of big ideas to long nights drinking with friends to lots of casual sex to long nights working on projects.
Because of all this I left college far more well rounded and prepared for my career and my marriage. To this day the skill of how to make friends and positive acquaintances has stuck with me and been a majorly useful skill.
damn bro!! I don't have this connection. Fellas all around me just i don't know why avoid me and like damn, I am not a friend of anyone. If I put a certain persona then I am likable otherwise no one even wanna see my true self.
This is not strictly true. You can still make deep connections later in life. Very true that it takes effort though, and not as easy as when you are younger. Not impossible though.
Take care of your body is the only one you have, use sunscreen.
Spend time with your parents and people you love they are not going to be around forever, do things they like.
You have time, don't rush into things. Don't think you are 25 you should have a family by now, life is not a race each person reach goals differently and not all have the same goals. Search what makes you happy and do it.
Worry only for what you control, if you can control it you can fix it, resolve it so look for solutions but don't worry about what is out of your control, you won't be able to fix it you have to accept some things are they are and learn to life with them being that way.
Do the things. Do them. Don't leave them until later. There are always things. If you don't do the now things, thinking you can do them later, there will be other things later.
Not doing the things only puts you behind, possibly forever.
I struggle with this too, and I'm old. It is a difficult habit to break out of. I urge you to put a lot of effort into this, make "doing the things" your habit.
But most especially, forgive yourself if you don't do the thing. The best time to have done the thing is "already", and the second best time is "right now", and if you do the thing at the second best time right now, when you're done it will become the best.
Or, if you're having a hard time doing the thing, just do a small part of the thing. A sub-thing, as it were. "It's a little bit better than it was before."
If you haven't yet, question what being a man means to you, and what being a good person means to you.
You will, throughout your life, find those definitions challenged. How you respond to the first will help you to develop a stronger sense of how you relate to your gender, and how it effects the way you interact with yourself and the world. How you respond to the second determines your character, which is how the world will see you as a person, and with sufficient introspection how you will see yourself.
Do not discard advice from older people because you think "the world has changed" and old people are out of touch.
ALL the advice that the older people in my life gave me in my teens about money/college/jobs/people/relationships was right, but I refused to listen to any of it because they were old and didn't understand my life.
Don't force yourself to learn every life lesson the hard way, like I did.
You'll probably learn everything the hard way...but I tried to tell you.
thanks!! yeah older people advice are good but like sometime they are not good when dictating about religion/politics/morality or when they teach you to hate certain people based on what they believe
I would say no, since it's too sycophantic which can lead down some dangerous paths.
In many countries there are NGOs or social services that can offer therapy cheaper, but it's hard to say exactly without knowing where you are. I read your other replies and based on what you wrote, you have had a pretty rough youth; you don't learn to hide stuff on the regular if your environment is accepting. If you ever get the chance for psychotherapy, take it.
Paraphrasing Terry Pratchett, the man who buys a good pair of boots will have dry feet for ten years, and the man who buys a pair of cheap shoes every year will spend more and still have wet feet.
Get to know yourself. What kind of person you are, what do you like, need and so on. Accept yourself as you are.
Sure, you can change your weight, learn new skills, become better at stuff and get stronger. I’m not talking about those things. Some traits just are the way they are, and fighting against them will only result in frustration, stress and sadness. Try to figure out which parts of you can be changed and which ones can’t. Treat them accordingly.
You are the only person who is fully stuck with you and vice versa. You have to live with your choices and behaviors, and I've never met someone who genuinely both should and does have no regrets.
You will fail to be a good person, you will disappoint people you respect, you will fuck up on the job and in your relationships, and you will be the asshole sometimes. Treat each of these instances as a chance for growth and humility. A sincere apology and putting effort towards being better in the future will go very far. And when others do the same show them the grace and kindness you wanted when you fucked up.
That said, some people are in destructive places and will keep fucking up and hurting people, understand when you can't help and when it will hurt you to stay in their life.
If you can’t be alone with, and genuinely love, yourself; you’ll never be able to do that with someone else. Living alone for a little while really helped me either this.
For many people, acceptance is super hard, and they end up struggling for years. Once you’ve gone through that stage, life suddenly starts to feel much less stressful.
Internalize your rewards for doing something good - don't look for external validation from others that you are doing a good job. This is especially important in relationships. It's great to be appreciated when you do the dishes, but you should be able to motivate yourself to do it and feel pride that you are carrying your own weight.
Who you are now, isn't likely who you'll be in 6 years. You'll change a lot over the next few years as you become an adult. Legally, becoming an adult is the difference of a day. But actually maturing into an adult takes time and effort. Yes effort, you'll meet plenty of adults who cling to their highschool self.
I don't know if alcohol is still placed on a pedestal like it was in my teens, but alcohol isn't that great. It's an expensive poison humans can sorta metabolize. It can taste good, but moderation is key. The point isn't to get drunk. As an adult who can drink anytime I please, is generally would rather just have water.
Now is a great time to get into a fitness routine.
If you don’t know, ask or find out. Knowledge is rarely a Bad Thing.
Read.
Take care of your health. It gets a lot harder as you get older.
Read.
Seriously, go to a library. Pick something. If you don’t like it, return it for something else. If you do, get some more like that one. But don’t be afraid to branch out.
Edit to add: pretty much everything said here is really good advice.
To add to this. You don't need to go to the library. Depending on where you live, you can go online to your local library website. Register with them. They will give you a username and password. Then you can download apps like Libby or Hoopla to check out books/comics/audiobooks from your mobile device.
Lots of good advice here and I am not THAT old but here are a few things I wish I had realized sooner in life (in no particular order or theme):
No one really knows what they are doing, more experienced people usually have just made the mistakes already.
There is a difference between being correct and getting someone to agree you are correct, the former is the most important and the latter is not always possible or desired and when to argue and when to let someone be wrong is a skill that takes practice.
The less time spent worrying about what other people think of you the happier you will be and the easier life will feel. In almost all situations you spend more time thinking about whatever it is than the other person does.
Always strive to be a good and like-able person but always remember that it’s impossible to be liked by everyone, sometimes people just won’t like you and that is okay.
One friend you can count on is more valuable than 100 acquaintances, guard and nurture your valued friendships like your life depends on it because it might some day.
The biggest thing though, there isn’t one correct way to live your life and anyone telling you differently is probably selling you something. Always try to learn something from every situation and you will be fine, mistakes are a part of life. Anyway, hope at least some of that is helpful!
Don't drink a lot. I've forgotten a lot of good times due to excessive drinking, and it's taken a toll on my mental health. I'm 35 now and trying to make some changes, but I've wasted about 15 years of my life just partying and being hungover. Not to mention the tens of thousands of dollars spent.
On a positive note: find something to volunteer your time doing. Even an hour or two a week is great. It's a great way to meet people, and there is so much good work being done by organizations who always need extra help.
Good luck to you dude, I know you have a bright future ahead of you!
The fact you had the initiative to ask this shows you're probably pretty intelligent. All I'll add is the perfect life doesn't exist. Do your best to enjoy it and be kind to people.
The lattory is a 'Stupid Person Tax.' Meaning that stupid people throw their money at it because they buy into the feeling versus the logic behind it. "The overall odds of winning a prize are 1 in 24.9. The odds of winning the jackpot are 1 in 292.2 million." source
You had better odds of you, a sperm cell, fertilizing your mother's egg, than you do currently of winning the Powerball jackpot.
I've also heard the "stupid tax" or "dumb tax" as what you pay when learning or doing something new. There will be times that you look or feel like an idiot, but we've all been there, don't let it stop you. Learn from your mistakes and persevere. You're never too old to keep learning - knowledge, skills, compassion, empathy, shame, regret, success, failure. Life's a trip, appreciate it for all its aspects and keep at it.
Take care of your teeth. Many loves will come and go in your 20s and maybe even 30s, but if its a life partner you want try focusing on yourself and they'll appear out of thin air. Friends are important but not as important as inner peace. If a job offer 401k start investing as much as possible as soon as possible. Everyone is going through their own crazy messed up life so be kind. Puff, puff pass and enjoy your 20s as much as possible while not losing sight of your goals. Goals are EVERYTHING, set the achieve them and set them again. Heartbreak and death are integral parts of being human. It's important to sit with and process the pain as long as YOU see fit. Death will come for someone you love someday, don't let drugs or alcohol be your medicine
i didn't even approached my first date as I don't know how to approach girls or guys cuz I am bisexual. I also live in religious society where dating only leads to marriage and I don't wanna be committed at this point
Yeah, the only ones that realistically “make it” by their early 20’s were born with a trust fund. Seriously, if you go read up on most of the big “American dream” types, you’ll realize that they only had the time to work 55 hours unpaid each week, because they had a trust fund feeding them and keeping them sheltered.
Bill Gates used to be the poster child for the American dream; A young scrappy programmer whose tiny tech startup beat the odds, thanks to Gates working so hard he would end up sleeping under his desk. Then when you dig deeper, you realize he was born a multi-millionaire. He was only able to take the risk with (and dedicated the time to) his tech startup because he didn’t need to worry about rent or affording his next meal.
I’m in my 30’s. In my high school graduating class, there are three people who have very obviously made it. All three of them were already obviously from rich families. Not full blown “you’ve seen them on the international news” rich, but “my daddy owns most of the car dealerships in the area” rich. Because that’s what it realistically takes to get away from the rat race.
I just have one.
Smart people learn from their mistakes.
Wise people learn from the mistakes of others.
You won't live long enough to make all the mistakes yourself.
I've never understood the desire to stand while peeing. Sure; when you've got too - like outside - or if a toilet is filthy and you don't want to touch it; but I've always been happy to take the opportunity to sit my lazy ass down for a minute. Plus I never have to worry about aim or cleaning up if I miss.
Don't hit, mame or kill anybody ever. That includes when driving.
When driving pay attention to the road and only to the road. Ignore work or home or school problems. Don't zone out.
Listen to your parents but don't listen to the parts that limit you. Be gay if you are or straight or smart or whatever, be you. But listen to the good advice.
Fuck a lot
Eat healthy
Pay attention in school and learn from others. Be observant and follow in other people's steps long enough to learn to blaze your own path.
Don't get a school loan or max out your credit cards.
Work thru school in a light non interrupting way. Don't get an 8hr job, just something part time.
Get that diploma and go find a job where they pay you for what you know. Work on something you like to do. Work to live, not live to work. But to get here, don't skip steps...sweep the floor before you shoot for CEO.
Mourn your losses, everyone dies. Be happy with yours while you can. Family is everything and there's not much more than your own personal desires beyond family. But if you don't have kids by chance or by choice, still be happy. There's plenty of people who choose not to have kids or be married or be in a relationship. Have bobbies. There's a lot of you time towards the end part of your life. So Hobbies are good. Watching people is a hobby.
Be at peace. Don't hate and help others not hate. Racism is the worse. So if you can help a racist person to accept others then that's good.
If you're going to go to college, go to a community college for your basics. Same classes, often smaller class sizes, and much less money. Just make sure the credits will transfer first.
Lift wieghts and or do some other physical activity. Its good to have two hobbies; a mental one and a physical one. The muscle you build now will be with you for the rest of your life, and its mucb easier to do it now than when you are middle aged like me.
Dont focus too hard on girls, just live your life and enjoy the experiences and relationships you build with all people; everything else will follow.
Travel, with a focus on the physically taxing things that are harder to do when you are older.
Invest what money you can, compound interest is real and it is the path to wealth (eventually).
At that age, I was trying my hardest to figure out what I'm doing, to be together like the older adults.
I'm 39, I don't have a clue what I'm doing and I'm more together than most of my coworkers, many who are older than me.
We're all just trying to figure it out, so when you look up and think you don't know what you're doing, you're with everyone. And if you know someone who says they have everything together and don't have any issues, be wary as they likely have a lot of blind spots to their life.
Open an IRA (or your country's equivalent), invest as much as you and still afford to live. A tiny little discomfort in the beginning isn't the worst thing. That money will grow tax free for year until you retire. The more you get in early, the more compounding works in your favor.
Before you get a career, live and work in another country or travel on a budget for a year. See other places, meet new people, learn lots of new things and get out of your comfort zone. Some people just walk or bike across a continent with a tent.
You won't be able to do it later in life when you have a job, family and commitments.
Yeah, maybe find a touring job for a year or two. Cruise lines are always hiring, and there’s plenty of technically skilled jobs that you could later transfer into other industries when you get tired of traveling. If you’re going to travel, do it young when you still have the time and energy.
Don't worry too much about the rat race. Take time to enjoy life and experience things with people you care about. The best moments in life can be really small things.
At the same time, don't waste too much time doing nothing either; use your time well, but use it to develop and improve yourself, learn something useful. Get a job you enjoy or consider important, at least. Doing work that you enjoy or consider important is far more valuable than the money you make. But don't ignore the money either. Just don't sacrifice your soul for it. Don't work yourself to death for a boss who doesn't appreciate you. Don't burn your relationships for money.
well I act like the person I don't wanna be all the time and do the things that I don't wanna do and yeah it hurts but they are important for my survival. I can face serious consequences maybe if I don't do these things.
But yeah, I got it. Thanks
If you aren't already, start going to the gym now and don't ever stop, or you will regret it by your late 30s. I stopped going at age 30; it's only been seven years since but I can already feel my body falling apart. Everything hurts all the time and it doesn't stop hurting.
Its reversable. I started going back to the gym at 39 and am stronger now than i was when I was younger. I have knee pain, but thats a weight issue honestly.
Do you know what the genetic difference is between a human alive today and one who lived 100,000 years ago? Almost none.
The real difference is shared knowledge. Every generation stands on the shoulders of those before it. You hold in your hands more understanding than any person in history could have imagined.
You will always be ignorant, not as a flaw, but as a truth of being human. Accepting that is where real learning begins.
Stay curious. Curiosity keeps you open to the world. It grows empathy, invites wonder, and reminds you that every person you meet carries a piece of the story you haven’t heard yet.
And when you share what you’ve learned, don’t speak as though you hold the final word. Speak as someone who has explored, reflected, and arrived at their understanding with care.
Learning is a lifelong conversation, one that connects you to every curious mind that ever lived. So keep asking, keep listening, keep growing. The future needs you.
As someone who wishes someone had told me... Adults don't know what we are doing either. It took me way too long to realize I'm not an imposter pretending to be an adult, we are all just kind of winging it.
As you grow older you'll have seen more stuff and it will be a little easier, but I can attest I don't have a clue what's for dinner, just like I don't know what new headache the next meeting will bring. Live life for life's sake, the clock will keep ticking whether you're ready or not.
Live in the present, take time to analyse things. It's ok if you are slower at some things. Every time spent reflecting will enrich your next reflection and bring more peace and comprehension. Be patient. Try new things. Meet people. Hold your own opinions to scrutiny, back them up with evidence. Do the work. Trust the right people. Don't give in to fear or anger. Allow yourself to feel sad. Analyse your frustration and feelings. Talk to yourself if no one is listening. Keep some of your hobbies especially if it's skill dependant going.
Personally i would suggest not going to university for at least 2 years, work a small job if you have a good living arrangement with family, and save up as much as you can for those 2 years.
Additionally, put some savings into an account that earns interest over time as a way to save for the long-long-term.
Games are a hobby. If they give you pleasure and joy, then there is no "better" thing to be doing.
How much of your time at 18 should be spent on hobbies is a different matter, but to dismiss games as an unsuitable form of leisure at that age is insane.
The games people play growing up and as young adults can be formative and massively influential.
They tell stories, frustrate, entertain, let you form social bonds, and even enlighten you in ways no other form of media can by allowing you interactively explore the thoughts of other people.
Plus, I'm not even 30, I am already noticing a decline in my performance in terms of precision and reaction time when it comes to the competitive genre.
I was asked for an old man advice and gave it.
Video games is not any hobby. It requires no physical effort and little social interaction.
It is suited for older married people.
Music does not "require" physical effort or social interaction. The same goes for books, movies and tv. Would you dismiss those, too?
Video games are an art medium, with exceptions to every one of your points.
Motion control games require tons of physical effort.
Multiplayer games literally cannot be played without other people.
There are games for couples, friends, parties, and quiet alone time.
It's an entire art medium, one which INCLUDES entire other art mediums like writing, music, acting, and more.
Your opinion is based on an incredible narrow interpretion of what video games are and can be. Or perhaps you haven't checked in on gaming in around two decades.
Either way it's resulting in absolutely horrendous advice.
Only a tiny number of the games I play and have played, are ones I would hold off on until I'm over 30 and married. Some people find their spouses because of gaming.
A LOT of games I played had their biggest impact around my 20s.
Your social life as an adult is very much what you make it. Go do things that seem interesting even if you feel you'd rather stay home. Chat with people when you're there. A huge component of modern loneliness is that we're able to stay entertained and with a crude social life without seeing others irl, but it's often not actually sufficient. So go get involved in something hobbies, activism, whatever events look interesting at the time. And remember that the things you do now are the memories and stories you'll have when you're old.
wisdom is often wasted on the elderly. youth is fleeting as are most the mistakes you will make in life at this point.
the following advice is fitting unless you're doing either of these two things:
making babies
taking a life (especially your own)
Live the three truths
you will always make mistakes
you will always hurt those you love
you will always have regrets.
the older you get the harder it is to recover from these truths. Live your life to your requirements. By the time you're closing in on your 30s, you should start to settle down and find yourself a quiet place to build your life for when you're in your 50s or 60s.
in your 30s seek out happiness and contentment. this will be your foundation to accept your regrets and mistakes. own the mistakes you made along the way, accept them like you would a bruise or blemish on your body. in time they will heal, if only you accept them and move on.
in your 40s harvest your happiness and contentment. accept there are things you cannot do not because you haven't or couldn't but because you shouldn't.
in your 50s store your happiness and contentment with the knowledge that nobody can take it from you, it's yours and yours alone.
60+ feed your soul from your stores, using the memories you made along the way. depending on the life you have led, share in new memories with those around you. celebrate their successes as your successes.
if you're lucky you will build lasting relationships along the way and will have many fond memories. you will inevitability have bad memories as well, but such is life.
personally I lost every single friend I have ever had. I never really recovered from it and now I have no friends. It's one of many regrets, but I never let it spoil my happiness and contentment. I find fulfillment by other means like hobbies, crafting, and family.
I never wanted to be married or have kids, but it feels as if what you think is important today changes by tomorrow. don't fight it, because you'll only be fighting yourself.
life is full of surprises, learn to roll with the punches and adapt to the world. if you don't, life will fucking kill you.
I may have to go to jail soon for a couple years. I'm a non passing trans person who is flamboyant & wouldn't win a fight against a small animal, can you please explain that last part???
Put a lot of thought into your college major. Pick the hardest one you can actually do. Take it easy on the substances, especially stimulants and depressants (yes, this 100% includes alcohol). Exercise regularly, sports are ideal because they're also social so you're getting two birds stoned at once. If you don't like flossing, buy a water flosser. Don't have kids until you're in a stable relationship and you both have good jobs. Get used to living on 90% of your salary, the difference in terms of stress between slightly under-spending and slightly over-spending is enormous.
The more discipline you can have without letting small lapses and setbacks get to you the better off you'll be in the future. Don't get set on something (job, relationship, philosophy) until you really know who you are and what you want, and explore WIDELY. Be honest and direct in your communication and you'll have less drama, the trash will take itself out. Find mentors, don't let them run your life. Use your body like a diesel truck.
Keep it running, use it for hard work, don't worry too much about the exterior or upholstery but keep the drive train and the suspension maintained and in good shape. Work hard, play hard.
pick up the "analogue bag" trend. none of us older than you approve of the internet today: we had a different place to grow up in online. you will be the happiest and most hopeful person around- others will remember your calm and seek you for comfort.
stop using AI. period. your brain is developing, let it suffer the growing pains of wondering what to draw; of which source of knowledge learn from; how to compose your thoughts. you will be the most intelligent person around- ever increasingly so as years go by.
age old traps checklist: status, whoevers the most popular that moment, flips on the head as you grow up... everyone will Hate how the most popular person behaves now in a few years. be humble if you're the popular one. at the sane time enjoy yourself: if you wanna indulge, indulge. saying stupid things from your heart is indulging. listening more than you speak is humble. that's the secret to popularity that lasts beyond school years.
hug all around you. say hi to everyone around you, even those you don't feel are cool- that you'd get bullied for associating with. that's all we adults are doing: catching up on hugs and greetings, because it helps our mood and makes us feel meaningful wherever we have to be.
learn an instrument, or an art, or a craft, or a sport.
say no to drugs. period. your brain and body are fully developed when you are 26. then you don't get as addicted and have an easer time finding a balance between partying and cozying up intimately in a couch. statistically you'll end up regretful if not abusing drugs or being abused while doing drugs below 26 years old. i can attest. drugs don't fix problems. they hide and let problems infect other parts of your life.
say no to sex that makes you feel pressured. as a guy i got status from chasing sex at your age, but if fucked me up to only be liked for being attractive. friends who cuddle are more important than acquaintances who fuck. one validates you as a human being and makes you feel seen. the other hollows you out while forcing you to become a person for the sake of others to feel seen.
be outdoors. pet animals. eat vegetables. drink water, not soda. drop food additives like "flavour enhancers" (e621) and aromas (vanilla aroma is made of literal cowdung and fossil fuels.) companies are not your friends: you're as cattle to the companies, so yeet their brands. wear natural fibres and what you like.
oh also shower every other day, use deoderant without shit additives every day, change socks & underwear every day, make your bed instead of letting your mom do it (especially when your room smells like teen spirit), open a window to air out your room everytime before you invite somene over, learn to use a washing machine, learn to floss your teeth, use conditioner after you've rinsed your schampoo, learn how to clean the toilet after you & how to wipe yourself in the front (shaking isn't enough among adults AND shaking excessively can easily damage your tube), trim your nosehair... i could go on with life lessons i've gathered that came to mind after reading your post. little details of adult life that are learnt in silence and not really spoken about in media outlets- but that got taught to me by older people and partners having an embarassing conversation about growing up. sucks to learn the hard way, worse to never learn these at all. domestic things regarding hygiene is rarely spoken about, but it's so friccin interesting to learn about "how to do it right". especially as a young adult who've never been taught to properly take care of yourself. like shaving with a barber's knife, sewing back buttons and patching holes in clothes.
it may be more big and suspenseful times to live in but these boring hygiene habits apply to adults now since the beginning of the parliamentary society in the 1900s. hygiene is less prevalent in immature adults and more prevalent in mature adults. ik it sucks to do, i have diagnoses of all kinds, but it's a sign of being a responsible adult to keep hygiene habits.
those cis-men who joke about men being beasts and cavemen aren't more masculine, just derogatory towards other men's potential. the manliest man isn't scared or toothfloss and doing dishes. weaker cowards make up excuses to not take responsibility for their hygiene.
Seems to be where the world is marching. They are surpassing the US and competing in many areas. They have a large population that is starting to travel more often. They are producing large content online that is not translated. They have their own YouTube equivalent (Bilibili), etc...
You spent 18 years learning to navigate a gated world. You will do just as much learning in the next 18 navigating a newly ungated one.
Think about the sort of kindness you would want to treat a younger version of yourself as he fumbled through that learning. Practice treating your new "young" self with that kindness today. It will pay dividends.
When I was in high school, I wanted to go to a couple specific unis. Being rejected was one of the best paths ever. I went to community college, made lots of friends, had amazing professors, took part in lots of programs where I made long term friends who even stuck with me to transferring to my current uni. I took a bunch of fun classes there that allowed me to get the skills I need to land the internship I have.
So my advice is, as a you guy, you have lots of time so test the waters, experience stuff, have fun, and you'll enjoy whatever it is you end up in.
Don't be that one guy who has to finish college in 4 years and then figure out that school didn't teach you anything and you can't find a job. You never took fun classes, joined programs, join clubs.
Some parents think you should just pick a path and run for it and never stop. But, they should realize that life is never a straight path. Some people run for that path and find out that's not for them. Taking fun classes that isn't part of your degree program can give you skills that make you more hireable because everybody else is that same cookie cutter person who took the exact same classes. You might meet a professor and have long lasting connections.
It doesn't make sense if you started off going down the math teacher route, find out you hate math, find out you hate teaching, and end up struggling through a path you hate and have a stressful life.
I have friends who added like 5 years on their lives, because they immigrated here from their country, as a young person, you have so much time to figure out what you want to do. If your controlling parents want the best for you, they should understand this.
Anecdotally, I know of a couple people who spedran getting a degree and now they can't find a job because a good chunk of listings are only for people still in school like sophomores and juniors.
If you spend an extra year or two at uni and get a job, you might be better off in the longterm. Then you can graduate to a better position since you have a year or two experience under your belt in the industry already.
I have controlling parents too but I am very good at hiding things so I just hide many things from them, like my sexuality, my beliefs, my music and etc
i am becoming that guy sadly. I never took fun classes. I just create music sometime or read books by myself for enjoyment but deep down, I don't have friends upon whom I can trust. I am friend of everyone but not of anyone
Some of the other comments touch on it, but usually mixed with other items, so let me reiterate. Your metabolism is going to slowly wane. Keep an eye on your weight and reduce your calorie intake now. It’s really easy to think “meh, so I’m 10 extra pounds, I can easily lose that later” but by later you will be 15 extra pounds. If you’re gaining muscle, that’s one thing, but keep yourself from gaining fat as much as you can.
Specific advice like "save your money" and "enjoy your money while youre young" and "focus on education" and "forget education get a job fast" are all too nuanced and will likely get ignored anyway.
This "song" pretty much covers the important stuff.
Being responsible is always beneficial. Sometimes you don't get/feel those benefits, but everyone is grateful when their bus arrives on time :) Just don't forget to being responsible with yourself too.
Religions are fairy tales for children who are afraid of death. They have nothing to do with reality. There is no god and no rational reason to believe in one. Part of growing up is accepting that.
That guy is a character in a book that wasn't written until decades after his supposed death. And those stories that made it into the book were knowingly cherry picked and modified to fit a narrative that the Romans wanted to push at the time.
The only "evidence" he rose from the dead was that someone wrote down that someone told someone else that they knew of a few people that saw an empty cave a few days after they had stuffed a corpse in it. And said book also contains a contradicting story about the same event.
So not exactly screaming reliable primary source...
That guy is a character in a book that wasn't written until decades after his supposed death.
Wait until you hear about most of history.... A lot of people we think we know were written CENTURIES after their death.
And those stories that made it into the book were knowingly cherry picked and modified to fit a narrative that the Romans wanted to push at the time.
That they were occupiers and killed the son of God? yikes
The only "evidence" he rose from the dead was that someone wrote down that someone told someone else that they knew of a few people that saw an empty cave a few days after they had stuffed a corpse in it.
No, some of the writings were first hand eyewitnesses, the rest were people who personally knew numerous people who saw Him.
And said book also contains a contradicting story about the same event.
No it doesn't.
There's more evidence that Spider-Man exists/ed.
No, because Spider Man is never claiming to be a true story and nobody ever claimed to be Spiderman. We also have a name - Stan Lee - who wrote the story and has no qualms saying it is fake. 2 billion people around the world don't believe in Spiderman.
A story claiming to be true does not make it more true than one that doesn't make that claim.
But if that's your sticking point, Lord of the Rings. It claims to be a translation of a true story. Was Frodo real?
A story claiming to have eye witnesses to events doesn't mean there were any, the author can say anything that makes their work sound more believable, and given that there were no other documents making those completely unbelievable claims, they remain unbelievable fictions.
It kind of sound like you are unaware of the council of nicaea...where they decided to make Jesus a divine figure, and not just a prophet, among other stories they twisted and chose to suit their needs. We may not know their exact names, but we know the group and the months they met to write this book.
A story claiming to have eye witnesses to events doesn't mean there were any, the author can say anything that makes their work sound more believable,
If you apply this logic to everything, history falls apart. The New Testament being written by someone who was around at the time and lived close to the events is quite apparent.
and given that there were no other documents making those completely unbelievable claims, they remain unbelievable fictions.
What do you mean "no other documents"? Apart from what? The documents making the claims?
What I essentially believe you're saying is "apart from the documents making those claims, there are no other documents making those claims". That doesn't make any sense at all.
It kind of sound like you are unaware of the council of nicaea...where they decided to make Jesus a divine figure, and not just a prophet, among other stories they twisted and chose to suit their needs. We may not know their exact names, but we know the group and the months they met to write this book.
I am fully aware of it, seemingly more than you since you're regurgitating Tiktok nonsense.
The belief in Jesus' divinity predates the Council of Nicæa. The Bible literally refers to Him as God several times. Even in the Old Testament at some points. And even in addition from that, it's clear He is not just a prophet, but the Prophecied Messiah
We know who a lot of them were. Such as St Nicholas, St Athanasius and Arius (the reason the meeting was caused)
The council of Nicæa didn't write any biblical book. It had very little to do with the Bible. They wrote the Nicene Creed which isn't in the Bible, but an interpretation of the text and summary of the belief. Also possibly the Athanasius Creed. The New Testament was already completed by the early Second century at the latest
How do you know that happened? You can write anything in a book. But just because it's written down doesn't mean that hobbits, wizards, or dragons really exist. You can't rise from the dead. It's fantasy. Grow up.
There is historical evidence for Napoleon. The same applies to Jesus. What does not exist is evidence for miracles, God, or other magical phenomena. Historical documents are never treated uncritically. One important criterion, for example, is plausibility. If a document states that Napoleon could breathe fire, it may say so, but it would not be recognized as historical fact. And the Bible is no more than that. A text with mythological stories for people who thought that a rainbow was a sign from God.
Seriously: how stupid do you have to be to consider hearsay stories from 2000+ years ago as empirical evidence? You don't do that for stories from Greece, Scandinavia, Egypt, or India with their religious legends. It's just mythology. And to be honest, it's just embarrassing to take it seriously.
And I didn't, because I'm not wasting my time listening to some self proclaimed authority figure tell me to ignore anything that disagrees with him or that bronze age book.
If you had teachers telling you to believe them and only them and no other data that contradicts them, then you had some epically shitty teachers, and should not be out here lecturing others...
This was reported twice for not being a shower thought. The reporters are correct, it's not strictly a shower thought.
But thinking about getting older is something we all do in the shower, for multiple reasons :)
Looks like people are mostly enjoying it so I'll let it stay for now.
Mods get them!
I think that's legal... Barely
It IS legal.
thank you moderator
Always double-check.
For example, the community you are posting in.
Measure twice, post once!
Everybody else is just faking it, too.
And everyone is trying to muddle through, including your heroes. I think it's good to keep this in mind; both to avoid feeling inferior for not having your shit figured out (because nobody has) and to be tolerant of people making mistakes – nobody's perfect and everyone has issues besides getting your order exactly right.
Be chill with yourself and with other people.
Non withstanding there can be fundamental differences which no one tells you about (like neurodivergency) so if something feels very off, it might be.
Don't drink and smoke.
Don't put your dick in crazy
Learn to shop, cook and eat without highly procesed foods
Clean the toilet when you are done
Adding to this:
Save as much as you can. One day, you’ll need it.
Take care of your teeth. It’s the only set you get, and it sucks when you start having problem.
Drink water. Lots. You do not want to experience a kidney stone.
Save as much as you can… but don’t skimp out on quality of life.
Too many people I’ve see pinch pennies to save only to end up dead or in a place that couldn’t enjoy it. Make sure to take time out for yourself while you can before it’s too late
Basically mine would be “all things in moderation”
Obviously, making time for yourself is a good thing. If you’re miserable, there isn’t much point!
I guess this is more a consequence of my living in a very consumer-oriented society that the importance of saving is so prevalent. Plenty of fun can be had for little to no money.
Take care of your back and knees too. You really don’t want to fuck those up because they will be lifelong pain if you do.
I mean, I agree, but I think it's more fun to find this out for yourself.
i fear from stove but gonna learn it
Use sunscreen.
Brush your teeth and see the dentist at least yearly.
Just post the song for him.
https://youtu.be/bwVVpwBKUp0
Stop reading beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.
i do. and it is best thing i could do. People call me girly for doing it but skincare is for everyone
The people who call you girly are idiots. Having said that, there's absolutely nothing wrong with being girly. I much prefer that to toxic masculinity.
Buy a plunger BEFORE you need one
On a related note, own a fire extinguisher before you need one.
Also learn how to use both before you need to.
In a similar vein:
Get a fire ladder if you're not living on the first floor
But seriously, learning to use a fire extinguisher needs to be emphasized more. I stopped a fire from becoming serious because I was trained to use a fire extinguisher and I put out the fire quickly. My partner didn't know what to do and she just handed the fire extinguisher to me. If she were there alone, the building could have burnt down. Or at minimum, all of our possessions could have been damaged.
It's easy to learn, but YOU NEED TO LEARN
Don't do drugs. But if you're going to do drugs avoid anything you have to inject with needles. There are plenty of fun things you can smoke, eat or snort.
I was told on my way to college to stick to natural stuff, and only with people I absolutely trust. I know there are plenty of natural drugs that can kill you quickly, dad was just trying to make it easy. I guess he figured I’d never see shrooms. At an A&M school. Surrounded by cow pastures. Anywho…
In my youth I thought I was old enough to try some stuff. I was not. Now that I’m older, I still think lots of drugs should be legalized, but I think 25 is maybe a good age. Let the brain finish developing before you start killing off the slow cells!
Don't do opiates or meth. You can smoke and snort those but the addictive potential is too damn high. There are other much more fun cheaper drugs.
Yeah, very few people can do opiates recreationally without addiction. Same goes for tobacco. Meth will fuck you one way or another (if you have adhd it may help while being a rough version of the treatment and basically guaranteeing you can't get the helpful stuff if a doctor finds out).
Stimulants don't make you smarter, but they do make you more confident, this is a dangerous combination.
Research every drug before you put it in your body, know the risks and be comfortable with them. And check drug interactions online with every recreational drug you're taking with each other and with your prescriptions. Lots of drugs have interactions both positive and negative with each other and while sometimes that's a uniquely good time or a particular perspective, more often than you think there's a risk of serotonin sickness
Unless your speed or skag are prescribed, and even then, take as little as possible to make you comfortable. Never up your dose, not even once, without checking in with a professional first.
Don't take advice from people on the internet.
Don't listen to this person, they are on the Internet.
And they can't even spell.
Don't smell people on the internet?
well you guys gave best advice and I got shitty advices offline not gonna reveal what i got
Strengthen your core. Lower back pain in your mid-30s is a bitch. Also, take care of your teeth and floss everyday. Start investing early. Any amount you can set aside, no matter how small, will payoff if you start early.
yeah lower back pain really sucks and i used to have it a lot some weeks ago
Upload posts to appropriate communities.
well I legit thought about this while in a shower so I think showerthoughts is an appropriate community for it
Live below your means.
explain
Let's say you're a student and poor. You live cheaply, eat ramen every day, etc.
Now you get your first real job. The amount of money at first will seem crazy. There will be the temptation to just splurge, buy watches, fancy apartment, fancy car on loan, etc. This happens every time your income increases significantly.
Now let's say you get fired. Suddenly you have the loans, the bigger apartment, etc but no way to pay for it. This will be very stressful and you may have to do things you don't want to.
Imagine instead you didn't have the car. You got a modest apartment, and saved some money. You have no debts, and can easily take half a year to get a new job no stress.
So when I say live below your means, I mean do not give in to the temptation to splurge. Spend less money than you make.
Try to put at least 30% or so of your income to the side (aim for 50%). Make an emergency fund of at least 3 months worth of expenses. Then start putting money into tax-deductible retirement funds and ETFs.
Most importantly, never take loans and keep monthly expenses like subscriptions to a minimum.
ok now i get it
Practice your hobbies, I didnt start taking photos or playing guitar until I was 21, I'm pretty good now, good enough to find enjoyment in them
learn a language?
oh and also, therapy
Yeah, I need to comment that no one should be using BetterHelp or the like, if you care about your personal and/or sensitive data being stolen in a breach. BetterHelp already had privacy issues that came to light. 1 2 3
Yeah, never feel like it's too late to start something. There's stuff (learning an instrument, language, craft stuff) I considered getting into in my 30s but felt like it was too late. Now I'm 40 and I've started and I wish I'd done it ten years ago, because I'd be so much further ahead.
therapy is expensive
Wear condoms every time
Also it's okay to not know exactly what you are gonna do with your life. No one else actually does either, as much as they think they might.
Let go of any fear of others expectations for you as soon as you can. Explore what interests you and don’t let others stop you. People come and go, but they’ll come to you faster than they leave if you’re a confident and passionate person. You can only be that if you work on figuring out how you want to live and chase that life.
Stay away from gambling sites. If you’ve got extra money and want to watch it grow, invest in Exchange Traded Funds (ETFs) with a low/no fee trading account. Stay away from meme stocks as well.
If you do invest, diversify your portfolio. SPY is very exciting but it’s heavily tied up in the AI bubble. Try to more international markets, clean energy, minerals, heavy industry. No matter what happens to the AI companies, we still need energy and resources to build stuff and keep our economy going.
Read about taxable and non taxable trading accounts in your country. Try to use those to avoid having your savings eroded by taxes. You will pay plenty of taxes on your income, so don’t worry about that!
what is SPY??
S&P 500 index fund.
The biggest advice I can give you is, you need to try to be social. It's easy to hang out with friends in high school because everyone's locked into the same building every weekday for 6 hours.
Once you're an adult, you no longer have that limitation. Even college is more of a "go to class for 2 hours a day then leave afterwards" type of experience. It's certainly liberating to not be forced to be someplace for long periods of time, but it also means that the primary reason that you hang out with your friends (ie, because they're already there with you) is now gone. It can make for a very lonely experience.
You need to go out of your way and actively maintain your friendships. Make plans to meet up at least once a week or something. Otherwise, you won't really get another chance to make deep friendships
Yeah in college I experienced both extremes. I spent about a year and a half completely isolated, just traveling between classes and my dorm. It was self destructive and my grades and mental health suffered. Then I made some life changes and started going to clubs and events and made friends and suddenly it was easier to study even though I had less time. I became extremely social and found myself spending nights doing everything from deep discussions of big ideas to long nights drinking with friends to lots of casual sex to long nights working on projects.
Because of all this I left college far more well rounded and prepared for my career and my marriage. To this day the skill of how to make friends and positive acquaintances has stuck with me and been a majorly useful skill.
damn bro!! I don't have this connection. Fellas all around me just i don't know why avoid me and like damn, I am not a friend of anyone. If I put a certain persona then I am likable otherwise no one even wanna see my true self.
This is not strictly true. You can still make deep connections later in life. Very true that it takes effort though, and not as easy as when you are younger. Not impossible though.
yeah indeed i can relate for that lonely part
Travel if you can afford to, it’s an incredible way to learn about the world and meet different kinds of people. Look after your teeth.
Learn how to clean properly, stains especially.
Practice a few basic but yummy recipes (trial and error for which work for you) and get good at cooking them.
Remember everybody is living their own life at their own pace. Don't feel like you aren't doing it right.
Ask for help when you need it. Nobody can do it all alone.
Stay in contact with friends and cut ties with people that make your life worse.
USE A CONDOM!
Get a vasectomy.
Don't stop training, don't eat shitty food (at least, not daily), don't believe anything you hear or read and always double check it.
Take care of your body is the only one you have, use sunscreen.
Spend time with your parents and people you love they are not going to be around forever, do things they like.
You have time, don't rush into things. Don't think you are 25 you should have a family by now, life is not a race each person reach goals differently and not all have the same goals. Search what makes you happy and do it.
Worry only for what you control, if you can control it you can fix it, resolve it so look for solutions but don't worry about what is out of your control, you won't be able to fix it you have to accept some things are they are and learn to life with them being that way.
Do the things. Do them. Don't leave them until later. There are always things. If you don't do the now things, thinking you can do them later, there will be other things later.
Not doing the things only puts you behind, possibly forever.
Do the things.
yeah i really struggle with this thing. gonna do them. thank you
Glad you came back to read this.
I struggle with this too, and I'm old. It is a difficult habit to break out of. I urge you to put a lot of effort into this, make "doing the things" your habit.
But most especially, forgive yourself if you don't do the thing. The best time to have done the thing is "already", and the second best time is "right now", and if you do the thing at the second best time right now, when you're done it will become the best.
Or, if you're having a hard time doing the thing, just do a small part of the thing. A sub-thing, as it were. "It's a little bit better than it was before."
If you haven't yet, question what being a man means to you, and what being a good person means to you.
You will, throughout your life, find those definitions challenged. How you respond to the first will help you to develop a stronger sense of how you relate to your gender, and how it effects the way you interact with yourself and the world. How you respond to the second determines your character, which is how the world will see you as a person, and with sufficient introspection how you will see yourself.
Keep growing. Keep learning.
Not enough people do this. Very good advice!
yeah i question it
Awesome!
If you're still looking for advice, another good piece I try to Employ is:
Always be working towards something, even if that something is just relaxation. Live with intention, because time unaccounted is time lost.
Do not discard advice from older people because you think "the world has changed" and old people are out of touch.
ALL the advice that the older people in my life gave me in my teens about money/college/jobs/people/relationships was right, but I refused to listen to any of it because they were old and didn't understand my life.
Don't force yourself to learn every life lesson the hard way, like I did.
You'll probably learn everything the hard way...but I tried to tell you.
thanks!! yeah older people advice are good but like sometime they are not good when dictating about religion/politics/morality or when they teach you to hate certain people based on what they believe
Start building credit if you’re in the US, but don’t treat your credit card like free money.
Don’t let yourself get addicted to alcohol (or any other drug).
Spend a decade commuting by bike if you can (rain or shine).
Get radicalized by the terrorists (people who just wanna have a nice safe society free of bigotry and hate).
get a dishwasher, always read contracts, be confident during interviews, hydrate your skin, do regular exercise
Go to therapy if you struggle with mental health - the sooner, the better. Change gets harder the older you get.
i can't afford therapy. is using Ai for therapy good??
I would say no, since it's too sycophantic which can lead down some dangerous paths.
In many countries there are NGOs or social services that can offer therapy cheaper, but it's hard to say exactly without knowing where you are. I read your other replies and based on what you wrote, you have had a pretty rough youth; you don't learn to hide stuff on the regular if your environment is accepting. If you ever get the chance for psychotherapy, take it.
Vote!
Local, state, Fed.
If you don't vote, you have no rights to complain about how government is functioning.
Buy quality things that will last a long time.
Paraphrasing Terry Pratchett, the man who buys a good pair of boots will have dry feet for ten years, and the man who buys a pair of cheap shoes every year will spend more and still have wet feet.
The paradox of thrift.
Or, buy once, cry once.
Get to know yourself. What kind of person you are, what do you like, need and so on. Accept yourself as you are.
Sure, you can change your weight, learn new skills, become better at stuff and get stronger. I’m not talking about those things. Some traits just are the way they are, and fighting against them will only result in frustration, stress and sadness. Try to figure out which parts of you can be changed and which ones can’t. Treat them accordingly.
You are the only person who is fully stuck with you and vice versa. You have to live with your choices and behaviors, and I've never met someone who genuinely both should and does have no regrets.
You will fail to be a good person, you will disappoint people you respect, you will fuck up on the job and in your relationships, and you will be the asshole sometimes. Treat each of these instances as a chance for growth and humility. A sincere apology and putting effort towards being better in the future will go very far. And when others do the same show them the grace and kindness you wanted when you fucked up.
That said, some people are in destructive places and will keep fucking up and hurting people, understand when you can't help and when it will hurt you to stay in their life.
If you can’t be alone with, and genuinely love, yourself; you’ll never be able to do that with someone else. Living alone for a little while really helped me either this.
yeah when I tried to suppress my bisexuality, it was just worse for me. Luckily this year I accepted who I am and it lifted the weight upon my chest
For many people, acceptance is super hard, and they end up struggling for years. Once you’ve gone through that stage, life suddenly starts to feel much less stressful.
indeed
Internalize your rewards for doing something good - don't look for external validation from others that you are doing a good job. This is especially important in relationships. It's great to be appreciated when you do the dishes, but you should be able to motivate yourself to do it and feel pride that you are carrying your own weight.
Who you are now, isn't likely who you'll be in 6 years. You'll change a lot over the next few years as you become an adult. Legally, becoming an adult is the difference of a day. But actually maturing into an adult takes time and effort. Yes effort, you'll meet plenty of adults who cling to their highschool self.
I don't know if alcohol is still placed on a pedestal like it was in my teens, but alcohol isn't that great. It's an expensive poison humans can sorta metabolize. It can taste good, but moderation is key. The point isn't to get drunk. As an adult who can drink anytime I please, is generally would rather just have water.
Now is a great time to get into a fitness routine.
Treat others the way you want to be treated.
Read.
If you don’t know, ask or find out. Knowledge is rarely a Bad Thing.
Read.
Take care of your health. It gets a lot harder as you get older.
Read.
Seriously, go to a library. Pick something. If you don’t like it, return it for something else. If you do, get some more like that one. But don’t be afraid to branch out.
Edit to add: pretty much everything said here is really good advice.
To add to this. You don't need to go to the library. Depending on where you live, you can go online to your local library website. Register with them. They will give you a username and password. Then you can download apps like Libby or Hoopla to check out books/comics/audiobooks from your mobile device.
Lots of good advice here and I am not THAT old but here are a few things I wish I had realized sooner in life (in no particular order or theme):
The biggest thing though, there isn’t one correct way to live your life and anyone telling you differently is probably selling you something. Always try to learn something from every situation and you will be fine, mistakes are a part of life. Anyway, hope at least some of that is helpful!
Don't drink a lot. I've forgotten a lot of good times due to excessive drinking, and it's taken a toll on my mental health. I'm 35 now and trying to make some changes, but I've wasted about 15 years of my life just partying and being hungover. Not to mention the tens of thousands of dollars spent.
On a positive note: find something to volunteer your time doing. Even an hour or two a week is great. It's a great way to meet people, and there is so much good work being done by organizations who always need extra help.
Good luck to you dude, I know you have a bright future ahead of you!
thanks a lot. drinking and partying is a tabboo in my country as I live in Muslim country
The fact you had the initiative to ask this shows you're probably pretty intelligent. All I'll add is the perfect life doesn't exist. Do your best to enjoy it and be kind to people.
thanks
Head to the Winchester and wait for adult life to blow over.
i don't even know where is winchester. I am from another country
You should go watch Shaun of the Dead.
The lattory is a 'Stupid Person Tax.' Meaning that stupid people throw their money at it because they buy into the feeling versus the logic behind it. "The overall odds of winning a prize are 1 in 24.9. The odds of winning the jackpot are 1 in 292.2 million." source
You had better odds of you, a sperm cell, fertilizing your mother's egg, than you do currently of winning the Powerball jackpot.
How much sperm is in semen? A typical sperm count may range from 15 million to more than 200 million per milliliter of semen
Let that info sink in for a moment.
I've also heard the "stupid tax" or "dumb tax" as what you pay when learning or doing something new. There will be times that you look or feel like an idiot, but we've all been there, don't let it stop you. Learn from your mistakes and persevere. You're never too old to keep learning - knowledge, skills, compassion, empathy, shame, regret, success, failure. Life's a trip, appreciate it for all its aspects and keep at it.
Tbf, they won out that lottery 🙃🎉🎆
DONT DO IT!!
THERE'S NO TURNING BACK
Take care of your teeth. Many loves will come and go in your 20s and maybe even 30s, but if its a life partner you want try focusing on yourself and they'll appear out of thin air. Friends are important but not as important as inner peace. If a job offer 401k start investing as much as possible as soon as possible. Everyone is going through their own crazy messed up life so be kind. Puff, puff pass and enjoy your 20s as much as possible while not losing sight of your goals. Goals are EVERYTHING, set the achieve them and set them again. Heartbreak and death are integral parts of being human. It's important to sit with and process the pain as long as YOU see fit. Death will come for someone you love someday, don't let drugs or alcohol be your medicine
Weed and alcohol are my medicine and you don't want to end up like me.
well they are tabboo too so it is hard to get there in my country
i didn't even approached my first date as I don't know how to approach girls or guys cuz I am bisexual. I also live in religious society where dating only leads to marriage and I don't wanna be committed at this point
Don't try and "make it" by 22 and realize that those who appear to do so are faking it.
Yeah, the only ones that realistically “make it” by their early 20’s were born with a trust fund. Seriously, if you go read up on most of the big “American dream” types, you’ll realize that they only had the time to work 55 hours unpaid each week, because they had a trust fund feeding them and keeping them sheltered.
Bill Gates used to be the poster child for the American dream; A young scrappy programmer whose tiny tech startup beat the odds, thanks to Gates working so hard he would end up sleeping under his desk. Then when you dig deeper, you realize he was born a multi-millionaire. He was only able to take the risk with (and dedicated the time to) his tech startup because he didn’t need to worry about rent or affording his next meal.
I’m in my 30’s. In my high school graduating class, there are three people who have very obviously made it. All three of them were already obviously from rich families. Not full blown “you’ve seen them on the international news” rich, but “my daddy owns most of the car dealerships in the area” rich. Because that’s what it realistically takes to get away from the rat race.
what is making it??
Exercise, have a salad for dinner sometimes, be careful who you date and keep friends you can trust to tell you when you're fucking up.
Meaning can be found in pain and we all face that.
I just have one. Smart people learn from their mistakes. Wise people learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make all the mistakes yourself.
Sit down pee when you're visiting a friend's house. Double points if you do the same at your own house.
I've never understood the desire to stand while peeing. Sure; when you've got too - like outside - or if a toilet is filthy and you don't want to touch it; but I've always been happy to take the opportunity to sit my lazy ass down for a minute. Plus I never have to worry about aim or cleaning up if I miss.
i do it yeah cuz I don't have urinals in my surroundings
Here's my rantomendation:
Don't hit, mame or kill anybody ever. That includes when driving.
When driving pay attention to the road and only to the road. Ignore work or home or school problems. Don't zone out.
Listen to your parents but don't listen to the parts that limit you. Be gay if you are or straight or smart or whatever, be you. But listen to the good advice.
Fuck a lot
Eat healthy
Pay attention in school and learn from others. Be observant and follow in other people's steps long enough to learn to blaze your own path.
Don't get a school loan or max out your credit cards.
Work thru school in a light non interrupting way. Don't get an 8hr job, just something part time.
Get that diploma and go find a job where they pay you for what you know. Work on something you like to do. Work to live, not live to work. But to get here, don't skip steps...sweep the floor before you shoot for CEO.
Mourn your losses, everyone dies. Be happy with yours while you can. Family is everything and there's not much more than your own personal desires beyond family. But if you don't have kids by chance or by choice, still be happy. There's plenty of people who choose not to have kids or be married or be in a relationship. Have bobbies. There's a lot of you time towards the end part of your life. So Hobbies are good. Watching people is a hobby.
Be at peace. Don't hate and help others not hate. Racism is the worse. So if you can help a racist person to accept others then that's good.
Shit
That's from "little Ms.Sunshine" you should watch it. There's a part when they're riding with their Gramps and he says that. Ode to gramps
what is mame?? apart from this question, this is quite detail and good
If you're going to go to college, go to a community college for your basics. Same classes, often smaller class sizes, and much less money. Just make sure the credits will transfer first.
Lift wieghts and or do some other physical activity. Its good to have two hobbies; a mental one and a physical one. The muscle you build now will be with you for the rest of your life, and its mucb easier to do it now than when you are middle aged like me.
Dont focus too hard on girls, just live your life and enjoy the experiences and relationships you build with all people; everything else will follow.
Travel, with a focus on the physically taxing things that are harder to do when you are older.
Invest what money you can, compound interest is real and it is the path to wealth (eventually).
At that age, I was trying my hardest to figure out what I'm doing, to be together like the older adults.
I'm 39, I don't have a clue what I'm doing and I'm more together than most of my coworkers, many who are older than me.
We're all just trying to figure it out, so when you look up and think you don't know what you're doing, you're with everyone. And if you know someone who says they have everything together and don't have any issues, be wary as they likely have a lot of blind spots to their life.
That's like "ATM Machine"
Open an IRA (or your country's equivalent), invest as much as you and still afford to live. A tiny little discomfort in the beginning isn't the worst thing. That money will grow tax free for year until you retire. The more you get in early, the more compounding works in your favor.
Just be nice. And listen. Always listen and pause before you speak. It will solve sooooo many problems.
Before you get a career, live and work in another country or travel on a budget for a year. See other places, meet new people, learn lots of new things and get out of your comfort zone. Some people just walk or bike across a continent with a tent.
You won't be able to do it later in life when you have a job, family and commitments.
Yeah, maybe find a touring job for a year or two. Cruise lines are always hiring, and there’s plenty of technically skilled jobs that you could later transfer into other industries when you get tired of traveling. If you’re going to travel, do it young when you still have the time and energy.
Don't worry too much about the rat race. Take time to enjoy life and experience things with people you care about. The best moments in life can be really small things.
At the same time, don't waste too much time doing nothing either; use your time well, but use it to develop and improve yourself, learn something useful. Get a job you enjoy or consider important, at least. Doing work that you enjoy or consider important is far more valuable than the money you make. But don't ignore the money either. Just don't sacrifice your soul for it. Don't work yourself to death for a boss who doesn't appreciate you. Don't burn your relationships for money.
Do the things you don't want to do.
You'll do the things you want to do, meaning the things you don't want to do are the important ones.
well I act like the person I don't wanna be all the time and do the things that I don't wanna do and yeah it hurts but they are important for my survival. I can face serious consequences maybe if I don't do these things. But yeah, I got it. Thanks
If you aren't already, start going to the gym now and don't ever stop, or you will regret it by your late 30s. I stopped going at age 30; it's only been seven years since but I can already feel my body falling apart. Everything hurts all the time and it doesn't stop hurting.
Its reversable. I started going back to the gym at 39 and am stronger now than i was when I was younger. I have knee pain, but thats a weight issue honestly.
Do you know what the genetic difference is between a human alive today and one who lived 100,000 years ago? Almost none.
The real difference is shared knowledge. Every generation stands on the shoulders of those before it. You hold in your hands more understanding than any person in history could have imagined.
You will always be ignorant, not as a flaw, but as a truth of being human. Accepting that is where real learning begins.
Stay curious. Curiosity keeps you open to the world. It grows empathy, invites wonder, and reminds you that every person you meet carries a piece of the story you haven’t heard yet.
And when you share what you’ve learned, don’t speak as though you hold the final word. Speak as someone who has explored, reflected, and arrived at their understanding with care.
Learning is a lifelong conversation, one that connects you to every curious mind that ever lived. So keep asking, keep listening, keep growing. The future needs you.
i really felt this heart touching. thanks
As someone who wishes someone had told me... Adults don't know what we are doing either. It took me way too long to realize I'm not an imposter pretending to be an adult, we are all just kind of winging it.
As you grow older you'll have seen more stuff and it will be a little easier, but I can attest I don't have a clue what's for dinner, just like I don't know what new headache the next meeting will bring. Live life for life's sake, the clock will keep ticking whether you're ready or not.
Live in the present, take time to analyse things. It's ok if you are slower at some things. Every time spent reflecting will enrich your next reflection and bring more peace and comprehension. Be patient. Try new things. Meet people. Hold your own opinions to scrutiny, back them up with evidence. Do the work. Trust the right people. Don't give in to fear or anger. Allow yourself to feel sad. Analyse your frustration and feelings. Talk to yourself if no one is listening. Keep some of your hobbies especially if it's skill dependant going.
Also ffs don't start smoking.
Your brain still isn't fully developed into an adult one. Another half decade or so should equip you with the rest. Take care of it!
Personally i would suggest not going to university for at least 2 years, work a small job if you have a good living arrangement with family, and save up as much as you can for those 2 years.
Additionally, put some savings into an account that earns interest over time as a way to save for the long-long-term.
It's okay to be scared, but do it anyway!
Break stuff and figure things out, take chances and have fun. You've got time. You'll figure it out.
thank you for this. these days, I feel like I got no time. I can't do fun but yeah I will try to improve
Go to the dentist, ask them how to take care of your teeth for the next 80 years, and do it.
If that means cutting down on soda, or acidic espressos, or candy do it.
If that means buying an expensive electric toothbrush with better toothpaste do it.
yeah i got braces last year and it is worth it. definitely gonna do it
The right age for playing video games is after 30. before that, there s better to do
Thefuck?
Games are a hobby. If they give you pleasure and joy, then there is no "better" thing to be doing.
How much of your time at 18 should be spent on hobbies is a different matter, but to dismiss games as an unsuitable form of leisure at that age is insane.
The games people play growing up and as young adults can be formative and massively influential.
They tell stories, frustrate, entertain, let you form social bonds, and even enlighten you in ways no other form of media can by allowing you interactively explore the thoughts of other people.
Plus, I'm not even 30, I am already noticing a decline in my performance in terms of precision and reaction time when it comes to the competitive genre.
I was asked for an old man advice and gave it. Video games is not any hobby. It requires no physical effort and little social interaction. It is suited for older married people.
Music does not "require" physical effort or social interaction. The same goes for books, movies and tv. Would you dismiss those, too?
Video games are an art medium, with exceptions to every one of your points.
Motion control games require tons of physical effort.
Multiplayer games literally cannot be played without other people.
There are games for couples, friends, parties, and quiet alone time.
It's an entire art medium, one which INCLUDES entire other art mediums like writing, music, acting, and more.
Your opinion is based on an incredible narrow interpretion of what video games are and can be. Or perhaps you haven't checked in on gaming in around two decades.
Either way it's resulting in absolutely horrendous advice.
Only a tiny number of the games I play and have played, are ones I would hold off on until I'm over 30 and married. Some people find their spouses because of gaming.
A LOT of games I played had their biggest impact around my 20s.
I'm 30 and I get really bad rsi now, but maybe I shouldnt play video games for 6 hrs straight
I have no interests in games when I am playing life as a game
Baz Luhrmann - Everybody's Free To Wear Sunscreen
Your social life as an adult is very much what you make it. Go do things that seem interesting even if you feel you'd rather stay home. Chat with people when you're there. A huge component of modern loneliness is that we're able to stay entertained and with a crude social life without seeing others irl, but it's often not actually sufficient. So go get involved in something hobbies, activism, whatever events look interesting at the time. And remember that the things you do now are the memories and stories you'll have when you're old.
wisdom is often wasted on the elderly. youth is fleeting as are most the mistakes you will make in life at this point.
the following advice is fitting unless you're doing either of these two things:
Live the three truths
the older you get the harder it is to recover from these truths. Live your life to your requirements. By the time you're closing in on your 30s, you should start to settle down and find yourself a quiet place to build your life for when you're in your 50s or 60s.
in your 30s seek out happiness and contentment. this will be your foundation to accept your regrets and mistakes. own the mistakes you made along the way, accept them like you would a bruise or blemish on your body. in time they will heal, if only you accept them and move on.
in your 40s harvest your happiness and contentment. accept there are things you cannot do not because you haven't or couldn't but because you shouldn't.
in your 50s store your happiness and contentment with the knowledge that nobody can take it from you, it's yours and yours alone.
60+ feed your soul from your stores, using the memories you made along the way. depending on the life you have led, share in new memories with those around you. celebrate their successes as your successes.
if you're lucky you will build lasting relationships along the way and will have many fond memories. you will inevitability have bad memories as well, but such is life.
personally I lost every single friend I have ever had. I never really recovered from it and now I have no friends. It's one of many regrets, but I never let it spoil my happiness and contentment. I find fulfillment by other means like hobbies, crafting, and family.
I never wanted to be married or have kids, but it feels as if what you think is important today changes by tomorrow. don't fight it, because you'll only be fighting yourself.
life is full of surprises, learn to roll with the punches and adapt to the world. if you don't, life will fucking kill you.
me neither wanted to be married or have kids
Money is very easy to spend, but Money is so very hard to make. Be cautious with your money
don't make a kid
Hey! I was a kid
Don't send dickpics. You never know when they'll show up on a leak.
true
Get a vasectomy
i heard it is risky
Do not break the weekend safety brief.
I may have to go to jail soon for a couple years. I'm a non passing trans person who is flamboyant & wouldn't win a fight against a small animal, can you please explain that last part???
Hol up
Put a lot of thought into your college major. Pick the hardest one you can actually do. Take it easy on the substances, especially stimulants and depressants (yes, this 100% includes alcohol). Exercise regularly, sports are ideal because they're also social so you're getting two birds stoned at once. If you don't like flossing, buy a water flosser. Don't have kids until you're in a stable relationship and you both have good jobs. Get used to living on 90% of your salary, the difference in terms of stress between slightly under-spending and slightly over-spending is enormous.
The more discipline you can have without letting small lapses and setbacks get to you the better off you'll be in the future. Don't get set on something (job, relationship, philosophy) until you really know who you are and what you want, and explore WIDELY. Be honest and direct in your communication and you'll have less drama, the trash will take itself out. Find mentors, don't let them run your life. Use your body like a diesel truck.
what do you mean by diesel truck?? finding myself still, hope i will find out. thank you
Keep it running, use it for hard work, don't worry too much about the exterior or upholstery but keep the drive train and the suspension maintained and in good shape. Work hard, play hard.
pick up the "analogue bag" trend. none of us older than you approve of the internet today: we had a different place to grow up in online. you will be the happiest and most hopeful person around- others will remember your calm and seek you for comfort.
stop using AI. period. your brain is developing, let it suffer the growing pains of wondering what to draw; of which source of knowledge learn from; how to compose your thoughts. you will be the most intelligent person around- ever increasingly so as years go by.
age old traps checklist: status, whoevers the most popular that moment, flips on the head as you grow up... everyone will Hate how the most popular person behaves now in a few years. be humble if you're the popular one. at the sane time enjoy yourself: if you wanna indulge, indulge. saying stupid things from your heart is indulging. listening more than you speak is humble. that's the secret to popularity that lasts beyond school years.
hug all around you. say hi to everyone around you, even those you don't feel are cool- that you'd get bullied for associating with. that's all we adults are doing: catching up on hugs and greetings, because it helps our mood and makes us feel meaningful wherever we have to be.
learn an instrument, or an art, or a craft, or a sport.
say no to drugs. period. your brain and body are fully developed when you are 26. then you don't get as addicted and have an easer time finding a balance between partying and cozying up intimately in a couch. statistically you'll end up regretful if not abusing drugs or being abused while doing drugs below 26 years old. i can attest. drugs don't fix problems. they hide and let problems infect other parts of your life.
say no to sex that makes you feel pressured. as a guy i got status from chasing sex at your age, but if fucked me up to only be liked for being attractive. friends who cuddle are more important than acquaintances who fuck. one validates you as a human being and makes you feel seen. the other hollows you out while forcing you to become a person for the sake of others to feel seen.
be outdoors. pet animals. eat vegetables. drink water, not soda. drop food additives like "flavour enhancers" (e621) and aromas (vanilla aroma is made of literal cowdung and fossil fuels.) companies are not your friends: you're as cattle to the companies, so yeet their brands. wear natural fibres and what you like.
welp i have more but idk if you'd read all
i have read it all. it was nice. thank you
oh also shower every other day, use deoderant without shit additives every day, change socks & underwear every day, make your bed instead of letting your mom do it (especially when your room smells like teen spirit), open a window to air out your room everytime before you invite somene over, learn to use a washing machine, learn to floss your teeth, use conditioner after you've rinsed your schampoo, learn how to clean the toilet after you & how to wipe yourself in the front (shaking isn't enough among adults AND shaking excessively can easily damage your tube), trim your nosehair... i could go on with life lessons i've gathered that came to mind after reading your post. little details of adult life that are learnt in silence and not really spoken about in media outlets- but that got taught to me by older people and partners having an embarassing conversation about growing up. sucks to learn the hard way, worse to never learn these at all. domestic things regarding hygiene is rarely spoken about, but it's so friccin interesting to learn about "how to do it right". especially as a young adult who've never been taught to properly take care of yourself. like shaving with a barber's knife, sewing back buttons and patching holes in clothes.
it may be more big and suspenseful times to live in but these boring hygiene habits apply to adults now since the beginning of the parliamentary society in the 1900s. hygiene is less prevalent in immature adults and more prevalent in mature adults. ik it sucks to do, i have diagnoses of all kinds, but it's a sign of being a responsible adult to keep hygiene habits.
those cis-men who joke about men being beasts and cavemen aren't more masculine, just derogatory towards other men's potential. the manliest man isn't scared or toothfloss and doing dishes. weaker cowards make up excuses to not take responsibility for their hygiene.
for deodrant part, i have skin problems due to which my dermatologist has forbade me to use perfumes and deodrants on my skin
fair and valid! :)
If you don't know yet learn a second language. Chinese seems the most useful nowadays.
English is my second language
Out of curiosity, why do you think Chinese is useful?
Seems to be where the world is marching. They are surpassing the US and competing in many areas. They have a large population that is starting to travel more often. They are producing large content online that is not translated. They have their own YouTube equivalent (Bilibili), etc...
You spent 18 years learning to navigate a gated world. You will do just as much learning in the next 18 navigating a newly ungated one.
Think about the sort of kindness you would want to treat a younger version of yourself as he fumbled through that learning. Practice treating your new "young" self with that kindness today. It will pay dividends.
Thanks. even though I am feeling overwhelmed and sad these days, I will try to love myself.
You got this, man.
Be nice to others, be honest, keep out of trouble, don't hang out with people who create trouble, and work on yourself.
Im probably not wise enough to give advice, but in general I think it's while you are young that taking big risks is more worth the trade offs.
Im talking risks like career wise or investment wise, business wise, etc.
Stick to your principles & rule of law like flies on shit
I didn't get principles. I am searching right and wrong.
Believe in yourself, especially if no one else does
If it's wet and ain't yours, really think about it before you touch it.
Bring a towel.
Be a goldfish.
There's probably only one play on this quarter. Don't look back and think "what if..."
pretty well said. thank you
When I was in high school, I wanted to go to a couple specific unis. Being rejected was one of the best paths ever. I went to community college, made lots of friends, had amazing professors, took part in lots of programs where I made long term friends who even stuck with me to transferring to my current uni. I took a bunch of fun classes there that allowed me to get the skills I need to land the internship I have.
So my advice is, as a you guy, you have lots of time so test the waters, experience stuff, have fun, and you'll enjoy whatever it is you end up in.
Don't be that one guy who has to finish college in 4 years and then figure out that school didn't teach you anything and you can't find a job. You never took fun classes, joined programs, join clubs.
But what if you have controlling parents ?
Some parents think you should just pick a path and run for it and never stop. But, they should realize that life is never a straight path. Some people run for that path and find out that's not for them. Taking fun classes that isn't part of your degree program can give you skills that make you more hireable because everybody else is that same cookie cutter person who took the exact same classes. You might meet a professor and have long lasting connections.
It doesn't make sense if you started off going down the math teacher route, find out you hate math, find out you hate teaching, and end up struggling through a path you hate and have a stressful life.
I have friends who added like 5 years on their lives, because they immigrated here from their country, as a young person, you have so much time to figure out what you want to do. If your controlling parents want the best for you, they should understand this.
What if they don't realize.
Ask them if their goal is for you to get a degree or a job?
It's the 2nd one.
Anecdotally, I know of a couple people who spedran getting a degree and now they can't find a job because a good chunk of listings are only for people still in school like sophomores and juniors.
If you spend an extra year or two at uni and get a job, you might be better off in the longterm. Then you can graduate to a better position since you have a year or two experience under your belt in the industry already.
I have controlling parents too but I am very good at hiding things so I just hide many things from them, like my sexuality, my beliefs, my music and etc
i am becoming that guy sadly. I never took fun classes. I just create music sometime or read books by myself for enjoyment but deep down, I don't have friends upon whom I can trust. I am friend of everyone but not of anyone
Some of the other comments touch on it, but usually mixed with other items, so let me reiterate. Your metabolism is going to slowly wane. Keep an eye on your weight and reduce your calorie intake now. It’s really easy to think “meh, so I’m 10 extra pounds, I can easily lose that later” but by later you will be 15 extra pounds. If you’re gaining muscle, that’s one thing, but keep yourself from gaining fat as much as you can.
Know thyself.
What irritates you the most in others are probably unconscious parts of yourself you supressed.
a big piece of advice. i am still finding myself. thank you
Specific advice like "save your money" and "enjoy your money while youre young" and "focus on education" and "forget education get a job fast" are all too nuanced and will likely get ignored anyway.
This "song" pretty much covers the important stuff.
Being responsible is always beneficial. Sometimes you don't get/feel those benefits, but everyone is grateful when their bus arrives on time :) Just don't forget to being responsible with yourself too.
oh yeah!! this is hard for a lazy me, but I will try. I am trying to improve on my studies and yeah, thank you.
If you are male, you can get male pattern baldness in this age, but you can stop baldness by taking finasteride.
yeah my hairline is receding and I am a male.
Just turn back.
where
Get on finasteride or something to preserve your hair line
Or even better, don't worry about your hair line. It's not worth it.
Don't take advice from lonely Redditors on the internet, like you are doing.
Fuck Reddit and Fuck Spez.
well i got religious tradcons ahead of me who are homophobic and racists in real life so redditors are better for me
Go to Church every Sunday
Religions are fairy tales for children who are afraid of death. They have nothing to do with reality. There is no god and no rational reason to believe in one. Part of growing up is accepting that.
Except from that guy who did miracles and stuff and rose from the dead
That guy is a character in a book that wasn't written until decades after his supposed death. And those stories that made it into the book were knowingly cherry picked and modified to fit a narrative that the Romans wanted to push at the time.
The only "evidence" he rose from the dead was that someone wrote down that someone told someone else that they knew of a few people that saw an empty cave a few days after they had stuffed a corpse in it. And said book also contains a contradicting story about the same event.
So not exactly screaming reliable primary source...
There's more evidence that Spider-Man exists/ed.
Wait until you hear about most of history.... A lot of people we think we know were written CENTURIES after their death.
That they were occupiers and killed the son of God? yikes
No, some of the writings were first hand eyewitnesses, the rest were people who personally knew numerous people who saw Him.
No it doesn't.
No, because Spider Man is never claiming to be a true story and nobody ever claimed to be Spiderman. We also have a name - Stan Lee - who wrote the story and has no qualms saying it is fake. 2 billion people around the world don't believe in Spiderman.
A story claiming to be true does not make it more true than one that doesn't make that claim.
But if that's your sticking point, Lord of the Rings. It claims to be a translation of a true story. Was Frodo real?
A story claiming to have eye witnesses to events doesn't mean there were any, the author can say anything that makes their work sound more believable, and given that there were no other documents making those completely unbelievable claims, they remain unbelievable fictions.
It kind of sound like you are unaware of the council of nicaea...where they decided to make Jesus a divine figure, and not just a prophet, among other stories they twisted and chose to suit their needs. We may not know their exact names, but we know the group and the months they met to write this book.
If you apply this logic to everything, history falls apart. The New Testament being written by someone who was around at the time and lived close to the events is quite apparent.
What do you mean "no other documents"? Apart from what? The documents making the claims?
What I essentially believe you're saying is "apart from the documents making those claims, there are no other documents making those claims". That doesn't make any sense at all.
I am fully aware of it, seemingly more than you since you're regurgitating Tiktok nonsense.
The belief in Jesus' divinity predates the Council of Nicæa. The Bible literally refers to Him as God several times. Even in the Old Testament at some points. And even in addition from that, it's clear He is not just a prophet, but the Prophecied Messiah
We know who a lot of them were. Such as St Nicholas, St Athanasius and Arius (the reason the meeting was caused)
The council of Nicæa didn't write any biblical book. It had very little to do with the Bible. They wrote the Nicene Creed which isn't in the Bible, but an interpretation of the text and summary of the belief. Also possibly the Athanasius Creed. The New Testament was already completed by the early Second century at the latest
You're being purposely obtuse now.
There's no other documents even alluding to the man's existence besides the book of completely unbelievable bullshit fairy tales.
How do you know that happened? You can write anything in a book. But just because it's written down doesn't mean that hobbits, wizards, or dragons really exist. You can't rise from the dead. It's fantasy. Grow up.
So Napoleon didn't exist, then?
There is historical evidence for Napoleon. The same applies to Jesus. What does not exist is evidence for miracles, God, or other magical phenomena. Historical documents are never treated uncritically. One important criterion, for example, is plausibility. If a document states that Napoleon could breathe fire, it may say so, but it would not be recognized as historical fact. And the Bible is no more than that. A text with mythological stories for people who thought that a rainbow was a sign from God.
Seriously: how stupid do you have to be to consider hearsay stories from 2000+ years ago as empirical evidence? You don't do that for stories from Greece, Scandinavia, Egypt, or India with their religious legends. It's just mythology. And to be honest, it's just embarrassing to take it seriously.
I am from different religious background
If you're looking to waste both time, and money, sure.
Going to church is free 🤨 what church did you go to?
Peer pressure to tithe just told rolls off you?
And I didn't, because I'm not wasting my time listening to some self proclaimed authority figure tell me to ignore anything that disagrees with him or that bronze age book.
Peer pressure to tithe? Nobody knows who tithes and how much.
Guess you didn't go to school then. LOL.
If you had teachers telling you to believe them and only them and no other data that contradicts them, then you had some epically shitty teachers, and should not be out here lecturing others...