Warts will only come back unless you fix the root cause with the proper medical treatment. In this case, 9 out of 10 doctors recommend lead injection therapy.
People like Anon‘s dad are the reason why earth is still such a backward hillbilly place. Irrational disdain for harmless things like queerness, meanwhile actual problems and crimes like global warming, PFAS usage, genocide and corruption from top government officials are being ignored.
Fun fact: Humans are less socially intelligent than apes.
Peak "fuck you, got mine". Same with my grandparents, they were anti-immigrant immigrants. Grandpa was also notoriously racist. I laughed so hard when some genome sequencing revealed a ton of sub-Saharan genes in that side of the family. My dad was about 25% African and Grandpa was hella dark. Now how could that be..?
The concept of racial purity is dumb everywhere, but it's especially dumb in the Mediterranean, where they had these things called "boats". There is just no way that an island smack in the middle of this shit wouldn't have DNA from all over the fucking place.
That reminds me of Richard Pryor talking about his trip to Africa. He would ask people there what tribe it looked like he was from and they would say "you look Italian".
I have two half-Thai cousins (Floridians, naturally) whose mother was a Thai immigrant, and they love to bitch about immigrants (as does my white uncle, who brought this Thai immigrant to the US from Thailand). Neither looks Thai, but one looks generically Central American and the other looks Japanese and they got abused growing up for that. It's really wild to me how this gave them no empathy at all for the shit immigrants have to endure; instead they do their best to be caricatures of white people.
Just to have an ackshoolly moment: humans are apes. If you mean humans are less socially intelligent than gorillas, male gorillas tend to do stuff like killing all the children fathered by the previous silverback. Human stepfathers at least sometimes don't do that.
I meant apes as in great apes, but you‘re right, humans are included in the Hominidae superfamily.
Gorillas almost only kill each other‘s children when the silverback dies and the group dissolves. Mostly because food becomes scarce then.
Meanwhile I have seen human parents neglect their children and steal their allowance to try and win a rare Labubu doll.
So yeah I‘d argue that as a species, the apes still got their shit together better than humans. (Except chimpanzees obv.)
I love how asshole parents assume their health will always be okay, and they’ll never need any kind of home care or a place to live. BURNING BRIDGES IS MORE IMPORTANT!
If you're in a situation like anon, get out of there as soon as you can. Always remember these moments. When your dad gets old and needs your help, tell him "only f*****s need their sons to do stuff for them".
Tell him this. Homosexuality can develop later in life if you're not accepting of gay people. In an effort to protect you from gayness, your homofobic body will develop gay antibodies, in time these will alter your DNA by consuming your straight cells and turning you into a big ol' gay. The only way to prevent this from happening is to be open and welcoming towards all gay people.
It does work, but because the antibodies wear off over time, it's necessary to regularly repeat the treatment. This is, in fact, a key driver of the success of Grindr
Ive been called a homophonic idiot for saying this, but people who truly believe its a choice surely must be repressed bisexuals.
Im completely hetero, I know its not a choice because I don't have the choice to go gay. I would have done really well as a gay too, ive had so many more men hitting on me than women. If I was bisexual, I would have the option to "go gay", and would have been able to make that choice.
I find it weird that people care whether it's a choice or not (for the record, I don't think sexuality is a choice, at least not usually). Is it suddenly OK to discriminate against people because of choices they make? Like which kind of car they drive or which music they listen to?
I haven't been called a removed before, but when I've been insulted in this sort of casual, out-of-nowhere way, I've found that responding with "go fuck yourself" in a calm tone of voice and then continuing my conversation to be effective.
I'm not saying you should break your dad's nose but standing up to him like the kind of (toxic?) man he would accept would probably change his attitude.
According to the right-wing, "oh what, you wanna outlaw comedy now? it's just a joke you snowflake!"
If you're not offended by the father's comments, just change the offending word to whatever you are. If you think nothing's wrong with it, it could be worth learning why
I got picked on a lot as a kid. What it did was make me hyper sensitive to other people's insecurities. I would see you and think: weight, race, bad at school, has a crush on X. I'd memorize it and put it in my back pocket and just dig at someone when they'd take a shot at me. It was a horribly daunting way to live because you're never really enjoying the moment.
If it had been a joke the father could have said something like "Time flies when you're a fairy".
I know that wasn't your point, but your first line made me realize that. It's still fucked up, but if you have a good relationship and know what the person is ok with that could absolutely be mistaken for a bad joke. Instead he just said something idiotic.
I don't participate (feels kind of gross), but I've seen people joke with each other using slurs about the other. But I'm not the language police I'm not going to tell people what they can and can't say. This wasn't even something that could accidentally be mistaken as a joke. This was just someone looking for a way to respond with a slur.
I agree with the banter with others. I do it with my friends. The thing is this ... it has to go both ways and if they can't jab back I usually give them a smile/hug and make sure they know I'm being a jerk. Like, they should be smiling after I take a jab at them.
The obvious answer is to invite over the biggest, burliest bear you can imagine, get him to befriend your dad and make your dad think you've finally made a "real man" friend, and then fuck the bear in the ass in front of dad. Assert dominance. Are you a removed? Absolutely. removeds can dominate the manliest of men.
I work with a guy who went through something similar. He is ok now, very out and happy with his orientation but still will talk about it, and when he goes home for holidays they still are unaccepting. He's 40 something and they still have not come to terms with his gayness.
My daughter's girlfriend literally started crying one day "you guys are so accepting of me" she practically lives here because her parents are not. WTF, parents? I don't get this. I live my straight lady life, their lives are theirs, their sexual orientation has no effect on me, unless they like assholes, which they do not, all have great boy-or-girlfriends.
Honestly wouldn't acknowledge his existence. A younger version of myself would refuse to believe this was a true story and that people are like that. Now, I'm wise enough to choose my battles. Some people just aren't worth your time.
Who among us ඞ can say what shape is best? We are all equally humbled by the unknowable geometry of cromulence. Topology is destiny, but Huey Lewis is old News.
fake: anon has any relationship with his dad whatsoever
gay: gay
Thank God those are separated incidents, otherwise this would be both fake and gay.
Honestly, I think his dad is just a giant abusive piece of shit, who would just use any excuse to beat the shit out of his son.
Interesting, I think this dad is completely imaginary, as is so often the case with greentexts
Interesting, I think the father is an amalgamation of several real father responses summed into one
The amount of reality bending going on in greentexts is unimaginable, so we might all be right
Everyone on the internet is a bot except you
Hey, the jumper cables need to get some use
Ask him what kind of nursing home he wants to be abandoned at.
Y'all are way more generous and less petty than I'd be tempted to be.
A cardboard box can qualify as a nursing home as long as it's staffed by enough care roaches.
That's approximately what I would have budgeted for.
A whole box?
Damn, fancy
"Nursing home for gay ass removeds who weren't accepting of their child's sexuality."
And his mom says nothing. Thanks for being a complicant piece of shit anon's mom.
My mom went a step further and told me I would never be in a happy and fulfilling relationship if I choose to date men
I can only assume she spoke from experience
Facts! my Dad's an asshole who sent me to conversion camp. I'm so fucked up and I now only function on great amounts of THC
Ouch. Hope you can find some happiness despite that. If only to spite the idiots.
my first thought as well
Homophobe father deserves a Nobel Prize if his proposed sexuality-based time dilation is reproducible under lab conditions.
Can the world move to FST until drumph, poutine, and bibi are in hell? That would be sweet. We can change back after, or not, both are good.
Warts will only come back unless you fix the root cause with the proper medical treatment. In this case, 9 out of 10 doctors recommend lead injection therapy.
My sides
It's such a stupid and nonsensical insult that I just love it
No way, man, I don't know where my day went! Wait, does that mean... ?
I'm just confused what a bundle of sticks has to do with all of this.
Just have sex with your dad already. Remove the sexual tension.
Or at least a quick dadjob to help him release some tension
“Uunh, I’m cumming!”
“Hi, cumming. I’m dad.”
*splurt*
People like Anon‘s dad are the reason why earth is still such a backward hillbilly place. Irrational disdain for harmless things like queerness, meanwhile actual problems and crimes like global warming, PFAS usage, genocide and corruption from top government officials are being ignored.
Fun fact: Humans are less socially intelligent than apes.
I'm from a family of immigrants, my parents complain about immigration.
Bitch, WE ARE IMMIGRANTS 🤦♂️
Peak "fuck you, got mine". Same with my grandparents, they were anti-immigrant immigrants. Grandpa was also notoriously racist. I laughed so hard when some genome sequencing revealed a ton of sub-Saharan genes in that side of the family. My dad was about 25% African and Grandpa was hella dark. Now how could that be..?
Sicilians? lol
Haha, you too?
No, I just like Tarantino movies lol.
The concept of racial purity is dumb everywhere, but it's especially dumb in the Mediterranean, where they had these things called "boats". There is just no way that an island smack in the middle of this shit wouldn't have DNA from all over the fucking place.
Especially after that island was invaded dozens of times since it's a great strategic location. Grandpa was very dumb.
That reminds me of Richard Pryor talking about his trip to Africa. He would ask people there what tribe it looked like he was from and they would say "you look Italian".
I have two half-Thai cousins (Floridians, naturally) whose mother was a Thai immigrant, and they love to bitch about immigrants (as does my white uncle, who brought this Thai immigrant to the US from Thailand). Neither looks Thai, but one looks generically Central American and the other looks Japanese and they got abused growing up for that. It's really wild to me how this gave them no empathy at all for the shit immigrants have to endure; instead they do their best to be caricatures of white people.
Just to have an ackshoolly moment: humans are apes. If you mean humans are less socially intelligent than gorillas, male gorillas tend to do stuff like killing all the children fathered by the previous silverback. Human stepfathers at least sometimes don't do that.
I meant apes as in great apes, but you‘re right, humans are included in the Hominidae superfamily. Gorillas almost only kill each other‘s children when the silverback dies and the group dissolves. Mostly because food becomes scarce then.
Meanwhile I have seen human parents neglect their children and steal their allowance to try and win a rare Labubu doll. So yeah I‘d argue that as a species, the apes still got their shit together better than humans. (Except chimpanzees obv.)
Then again, gorillas don't have a concept of money or labubu dolls. Basically, our society gives more opportunities to fuck up.
I love how asshole parents assume their health will always be okay, and they’ll never need any kind of home care or a place to live. BURNING BRIDGES IS MORE IMPORTANT!
If you're in a situation like anon, get out of there as soon as you can. Always remember these moments. When your dad gets old and needs your help, tell him "only f*****s need their sons to do stuff for them".
Fake: anon spends time with his parents
Gay: time flies for anon
Tell him it's hereditary and that he must have the genes? Lol
Tell him this. Homosexuality can develop later in life if you're not accepting of gay people. In an effort to protect you from gayness, your homofobic body will develop gay antibodies, in time these will alter your DNA by consuming your straight cells and turning you into a big ol' gay. The only way to prevent this from happening is to be open and welcoming towards all gay people.
I sucked a guys's dick to build immunity aginst gayness, did I do this right?
(I'm kidding lol, I'm still virgin)
It does work, but because the antibodies wear off over time, it's necessary to regularly repeat the treatment. This is, in fact, a key driver of the success of Grindr
He got those good genes like that pants ad
Go fishing until they are dead. Time will fly by.
just quit gaying bro
Why would you say something so hateful and divisive?
Please dm me your current location so we can take our shirts off and kiss
Oh you loatful little egotistical brat, shut it with this DM thing.
Why shouldn't I just release this information right here, publically? You don't like sharing, do you now?
This is very confusing, but also pretty enraging. We're not kissing with our shirts off right now and this. will. not. stand.
I really wanted to see where this was going. The obvious flirtation, the passive-aggressive challenge, it was really building to something.
It's heatin up brother
I wonder what he would say if you told him that it's on him and must be in his blood too since he sired you.
You think the dad doesn't believe it's a choice?
Ive been called a homophonic idiot for saying this, but people who truly believe its a choice surely must be repressed bisexuals.
Im completely hetero, I know its not a choice because I don't have the choice to go gay. I would have done really well as a gay too, ive had so many more men hitting on me than women. If I was bisexual, I would have the option to "go gay", and would have been able to make that choice.
I find it weird that people care whether it's a choice or not (for the record, I don't think sexuality is a choice, at least not usually). Is it suddenly OK to discriminate against people because of choices they make? Like which kind of car they drive or which music they listen to?
I don't know exactly what he thinks or how his framework would be impacted by insinuating the "weakness" is from his genes. 🤷
Just bide your time and wait for him to say that went by fast or time flies and hit him back with a hard f-word.
I haven't been called a removed before, but when I've been insulted in this sort of casual, out-of-nowhere way, I've found that responding with "go fuck yourself" in a calm tone of voice and then continuing my conversation to be effective.
I'm not saying you should break your dad's nose but standing up to him like the kind of (toxic?) man he would accept would probably change his attitude.
What is he going to do? Call the cops and tell them he got roughed up by a f-word?
I mean yes, that's exactly what the fucking coward would do
According to the right-wing, "oh what, you wanna outlaw comedy now? it's just a joke you snowflake!"
If you're not offended by the father's comments, just change the offending word to whatever you are. If you think nothing's wrong with it, it could be worth learning why
I got picked on a lot as a kid. What it did was make me hyper sensitive to other people's insecurities. I would see you and think: weight, race, bad at school, has a crush on X. I'd memorize it and put it in my back pocket and just dig at someone when they'd take a shot at me. It was a horribly daunting way to live because you're never really enjoying the moment.
If it had been a joke the father could have said something like "Time flies when you're a fairy".
I know that wasn't your point, but your first line made me realize that. It's still fucked up, but if you have a good relationship and know what the person is ok with that could absolutely be mistaken for a bad joke. Instead he just said something idiotic.
I don't participate (feels kind of gross), but I've seen people joke with each other using slurs about the other. But I'm not the language police I'm not going to tell people what they can and can't say. This wasn't even something that could accidentally be mistaken as a joke. This was just someone looking for a way to respond with a slur.
I agree with the banter with others. I do it with my friends. The thing is this ... it has to go both ways and if they can't jab back I usually give them a smile/hug and make sure they know I'm being a jerk. Like, they should be smiling after I take a jab at them.
The obvious answer is to invite over the biggest, burliest bear you can imagine, get him to befriend your dad and make your dad think you've finally made a "real man" friend, and then fuck the bear in the ass in front of dad. Assert dominance. Are you a removed? Absolutely. removeds can dominate the manliest of men.
Go to your room? drop an "ok boomer", this fucker sounds like he'd explode at it
Start fishing, dad will be dead in no time.
Q: What does that say about dad watching fishing on tv rather than doing it for real on the water?
A: The man has sucked every dick in town.
I work with a guy who went through something similar. He is ok now, very out and happy with his orientation but still will talk about it, and when he goes home for holidays they still are unaccepting. He's 40 something and they still have not come to terms with his gayness.
My daughter's girlfriend literally started crying one day "you guys are so accepting of me" she practically lives here because her parents are not. WTF, parents? I don't get this. I live my straight lady life, their lives are theirs, their sexual orientation has no effect on me, unless they like assholes, which they do not, all have great boy-or-girlfriends.
Honestly wouldn't acknowledge his existence. A younger version of myself would refuse to believe this was a true story and that people are like that. Now, I'm wise enough to choose my battles. Some people just aren't worth your time.
“Good one, dad! Hey, would you mind just standing at the top of these stairs real quick?”
It'll all be over quickly, after all time flies when you're a fag, can I get that on a hoodie?
call him a square
I have heard that it is hip to be square, though I am not sure that it is cool to be hip these days
Who among us ඞ can say what shape is best? We are all equally humbled by the unknowable geometry of cromulence. Topology is destiny, but Huey Lewis is old News.
I'm pretty sure it's still hip to be cool though.
But is it groovy to be funky?
Word
Go fishing but come back with a full bucket of fish within an hour.
Sorry bucket is full of seamen
The Dreamcast game with a voice over by Leonard Nimoy? Pretty sure copies of it are kinda expensive nowadays.
Posts suck when anon is a removed
Call kesb
At least it would have made a bit of sense saying : Time flies when you are gay?