Violets are glorious,

Don't try to surprise

Oscar Pistorius

(Since he's back in the headlines I couldn't help but remember this oldie)

DJ Calvert told BBC News NI: "I've been let down - and I'm not the only one."

It was proof that Northern Ireland's health and social care system had "crashed", said the 49-year-old.

Honestly I am so bloody baffled by this.

I removed the smoke alarm that would be affected by vibration from the loft floor (which was in the room directly underneath), but the other alarms still go off when someone walks up there (they're all wired together, so when one goes off they all go off). I removed the one that's in the loft too, but it still happens.

I have no fecking idea what else to do 😅 should we go in under the loft floor to have a look, or into the ceiling underneath the loft floor? Any suggestions for what to look for? Should I be concerned that vibration is affecting wiring? Is it spooky ghosts?

I reckon it’s Anne Robinson. Fight me.

"Based on these findings, the authors warn that more than a fifth of ecosystems worldwide, including the Amazon rainforest, are at risk of a catastrophic breakdown within a human lifetime."

"The Archbishops' Council confirmed it was "ending the contracts" of all three board members - acting chair Meg Munn, Jasvinder Sanghera and Steve Reeves.

The latter two recently claimed the Church had been obstructive and interfered with their work."

We carry our harpoons

For there ain't no whales

So we tell tall tales

And sing our whaling tuuuuune

This has been stuck in my head since I woke up, and now it's stuck in yours. You're welcome.

A bagel.

Because the House always wins.