Maybe I will never be, all the things that I want to be, now is not the time to cry, now's the time to find out why....

I don't get this... Its weird to me that people would propose without knowing their SO would say yes..

With my wife, we'd both spoken about it and knew we wanted to get married one day. The proposal was more a formality than anything.. It feels like an odd thing to be surprised with and have to give an immediate answer on...

Man....

Ok, so I was 12 years old and had only just moved from England to Australia. First few days of high school I noticed this girl. Normal looking girl - beautiful eyes, but one of those beautiful people that tends to be quiet and go by unnoticed... But I noticed her.

I was always very outgoing and loud, and she was more quiet and reserved. I loved to do card tricks. I also became incredibly shy when I wanted to talk to her, so I devised a plan

I laid some playing cards on the corner of my desk and waited for her to walk past. When she did, I knocked them off and we started a conversation..

Eventually I did a card trick and knew she'd picked the 3 of Diamonds. That card has held significance for us this whole time..

Through high school we both had feelings for eachother - me, being confident, silly and outgoing declaring my love for her to everyone and asking her out on a few occasions, never looking at the other girls who wanted to spend more time with the English boy who now lives in Australia. I only had eyes for her. I just knew she was the one.

But for 4 and a half years of high school it never happened. She was too shy to say yes, and I was too shy to ask properly. Sure, I'd slipped her notes and I'd asked on a few occasions, but it never happened. She did say yes once and we "dated" for 2 weeks but nothing happened, not a kiss, nothing. We were both young and inexperienced in relationships and after 2 weeks she said "you're dumped"... It hurt.

But for that whole high school time everyone in school knew we wanted eachother.

Then came secondary school (High school in Aus is year 7-10 when you're like, 12-16ish in age, secondary is Year 11 and 12 when you're about 16-18ish)

In secondary school I met my then best friend.. He was a great bloke and we got along like a house on fire. A couple of months into Year 11 he asked if he could ask the girl I loved out.. I told him "Why not, she doesn't want me anyway" so he did.

They got together and we stayed friends. I was heartbroken but I wanted the best for her and he seemed like a good bloke, and I didn't want to ruin what they had by being upset or jealous, and I didn't want to lose my friendship with either of them, so I kept my feelings hidden and eventually went on to date other girls. By this time she and I were about 16...

The following few years we all hung out with our friends group and they stayed together... I was the best man at their wedding and one of the first to meet their newborn son when he arrived...

But then slowly we drifted.. Id message him and get no replies, or short and careless ones. I'd long since stopped messaging her as usually messaging him was realistically intended for the both of them anyway...

And so 4 years went by without any contact from either of them...

Then I had a son. I wasn't in a good place or a good relationship at the time. Don't get me wrong, my then partner was fine. She is a good person but we just didn't fit and I feel I was with her out of lonliness more than love.

Anyhow, I got a message from the girl I loved through high school congratulating me on my son. I replied and asked how she was, told her I missed them and proposed a catch up with us all. I got no reply.

Another year passed and I left my then partner. 4 months-ish later, my high school crush had her then husband removed from the house for domestic violence. I found out through a chance encounter with her sister.

We made arrangements for me to go visit, and so I did.

I stepped into her house where her family was helping tidy the place and saw her down the long hall at a distance and so many of those feelings came flooding back.

I walked up and gave her the biggest hug. It felt like I held her forever... Then I got to work on helping tidy the house.. Then I met her daughter for the first time. At this point she'd had 2 kids with her then husband. One was 3, the other, 5.

Through the next couple of weeks I spent a lot of time catching up with her and trying to offer my help where I could. I learned a lot more about my old "friend" and just how controlling, coercive, manipulative and abusive he was for the 17 years they were together. 17 long years that feel as if they were robbed from "us".. But we were so young...

At one point we kissed. And that was it. Finally, after knowing her for 21-22 years and loving her for so long, we finally kissed.

It just was right. There was so much going on, court dates to maintain an intervention order against her ex husband, him lying about anything and everything. His manipulation of the court system and even his own children continues to this day... But finally we had eachother and we weren't about to let go.

I'd had a vasectomy after my son was born... But after a year of being with her I got it reversed. We now have a beautiful daughter together. We got married, too. Life together is what we should have always had. We both feel it.

Its tremendously difficult being the stepdad of 2 kids that are being conditioned and coerced into hating you 5 nights a fortnight, but they're good kids. I'm trying my best for them

I feel I have a lot to unpack and work through but with 4 kids and working in disability support its next to impossible to afford any kind of therapy, let alone the free time to attend..

But I love her. So much. And she loves me. I have a tattoo on my side - a silhouette of the 2 of us on our wedding day, surrounded by the clubs, diamonds, hearts and spades suits to symbolise how we met. There are 3 diamonds.

Through the abuse she endured theres a lot for us both to work through but again, we're so lucky to finally have eachother. We're 35 now and spent half our lives apart, despite at one point wanting to be with eachother for 1/3 of our lives to that point.. We're not letting eachother go now. I couldn't imagine life without her. She is everything to me. I just feel so sorry for our past selves. They deserved so much better.

I have to keep reminding myself that had we gotten together back then it might not have worked out how it has. We may have grown apart, or not had anything to compare to in order to see how good we really have it...

I love her. Always.

I've never written that all down before. There's plenty more to it, but I felt compelled to really delve into it that time. Thank you so much for asking the question.

Not for the newborn it isn't. Something as personal as your own genetals should be your own personal choice, but in this instance the owner of the penis gave no consent.

Absolutely. My favourite of the IT crowd.

Aside from all the hilarity inbetween, the set ups to the last few gags are ridiculous and the payoff is brilliant.

Jen, talking to Roy, figuring out why on earth he's in that wheelchair only to turn around in desperate need of a drink, to see Moss politely ready to serve her at the bar...

"Willys, willys, I like willys" "I love willys..." "What?" "It's I LOVE WILLYS!" "---Sir, would you keep it down!?"

My favourite too, mate. So bloody good.

Yo, I had a vasectomy at 31, but then loads of stuff happened and at 33 I met my now wife... and spent $12,000 australian reversing the vasectomy.... I was CERTAIN I didn't want kids.

Just a thought..

That said, I still don't regret having the vasectomy. I do regret the money lost.

I work disability support and have found ChatGPT to be really helpful for someone I work with who has cerebral palsy. Basically he prompts GPT to make his sentences more concise and it does just that.

For him, that's really helpful.

Of course, to each their own, but I believe it does have its place in assisting people with disabilities IF THEY WANT AI ASSISTANCE

And how can the camera scan its own phone screen for the QR?

Depends on whether I also get the knowledge on living as an ant, as a queen, in a colony.

Hardest thing would be predators.

I suppose the best I could do would be to find something to write with, like dirt or ink, and a scrap of paper, and "walk" some words along a page, hopefully notify a good human that I was an intelligent/human ant - and from there I'd be at the mercy of capitalism...

Hydrate, and edge...

I wish I had the ability to be more concise. You said exactly what I needed to say but didn't ramble like I did. Beautifully worded.

Being fair, humans now have no realistic predators and we're stripping the planet bare.....

Oh, I am not ok then... I think some days I fart more than I talk...

My wife. I want her to get better, though. Depression is a cunt. So is her abusive ex husband.

Wow. That was rude

Mine said "Are you feeling anything yet?"

I said "I don't think so... The lights are a bit fuzzy bu-........." and I was suddenly waking up in the recovery room.

Super quick.

Seconded.

I had a mate who didn't speak with his parents, lost his job and left his partner.

Took him in, rent free for 6 months. Got him on his feet, he got a new job and 6 months later he left... With my 10 year relationship. And my cat (but to be fair my ex was a vet so it made sense that she took him)

I thought he was a friend.

What you said reminded ne of this bloke, who I found hilarious

https://youtu.be/6xxiK6Z4eXs

Swap it. Bring one from home, and accidentally take this one back