This is simply incorrect, the guidelines approved and enforced since Victorian times is the man kneels before the woman sat on the bed, they hold hands, the lights go out for a minute, then come back on and she is now with child.
Anyone found breaching said guidelines are roundly shunned through heavy tutting.
Almost. Almost. Almost....
There we are...
Well done.
Good show ol' sport
tally ho what what
splendid
I use this one with my partner often (Not in the boudoir)... she's quite fond of it!
Oi, quite right. Quite right indeed! Carry on gov-na.
This is simply incorrect, the guidelines approved and enforced since Victorian times is the man kneels before the woman sat on the bed, they hold hands, the lights go out for a minute, then come back on and she is now with child.
Anyone found breaching said guidelines are roundly shunned through heavy tutting.
I misread that as the man kneels, before the woman shat on the bed.
Some traditions never change
James Joyce has subscribed to your newsletter.
The Anglo-Saxons are just low Germans after all
Well then, Bob's your uncle.
how's that for a slice of fried gold?
..."And Fanny's your aunt." I've been told concludes the expression lol.
I always have wanted to work "Bob's your uncle" into my everyday speech, but I always forget it exists
Love me a good snogging while rogering.
The fuck is rogering?
That's rodgering. Clearly annunciated, too, if you please.
Now that is tickety-boo
Hold tight now
Nearly at the station
do you desire this, you fiddle stick muppet?
You like that, you fucking retard?
I can't decide which one's better...
No British person speaks like this. You, you, you nincompoop!!!
Cor blimey, guvnor, I done gone and said the only swearword that's frowned upon!!!
So I tell the swamp donkey to sock it before I give her a trunky in the tradesman's entrance and have her lick me yardballs!
Hate me all you want but I have a thing for women with a cockney accent
How do you feel about chimneysweeps with a cock-er-nee accent and their own dancing penguins? We've got one of those going spare. :starts whistling:
That's fine as long as you're not being a dick to everyone who doesn't fit your fetish.
Not being a dick, in this context?
You found the joke. Now put it back! ;)
Oops, I should doubt my autismlessness
sexHorizontal jogging
Some of the old in-out, in-out.
Real savage
Peepee friction pleasure
Slap and tickle
I will admit, as a brit, that my automatic reaction to being startled is "Good Lord!"... 🧐
As a Briton, I appear to use either the traditional "fuckin' 'ell" or "shittin' 'ell" or the somewhat nonsensical "shit the fuck".
I'd be interested to see if I could train myself to switch to "Good Lord!", like some sort of gritty Northern "My Fair Lady".
Northern: "Flihhhliipin' 'eck!"
I have pinnacled! I dare say!
Now we know
Now we know...
NOW WE KNOW
NOW WE KNOW!!!
Shall I put the kettle on then?
Fancy a cuppa
It wasn't until relatively recently that I learned that the British often use "tea" as the word for their midday meal.
As in, "what are you cooking for tea today?"
Weird
Tea is not the midday meal, it's the evening meal. Usually the largest meal of the day on a work day evening.
Depends on where you live...
Up north tea/supper is also another word for dinner
Textbook intercourse
Sounds like that involves a few paper cuts
Chapter 5 was begging for it
Textbook rape
Does she... go?
Nudge nudge, know what I mean?
Say no more, say no more.
Married a brit can confirm
Omg... do Americans say Toosday ?
Twos-day.
Won chew free, innit?
It is Twosday
We say Tuesday
I thought it was Twosday
So, too-es-day?
It's pronounced like Tuesday.
Naw, today's clearly Threesomesday.
Wait... Is it really not just:
"Oi oi oi oi oi! Have a biscuit ya cunt!"
It's also that.
You’ve gone too far. You’re in Australia now
Wouldn't it be, "have a cunt ya biscuit?" Sorry, I don't speak English.
"Have a cunt ya cunt, I just cunted in yer cunt" might also be acceptable. I'm actually for real not sure and was asking in hopes of a real answer.
Oi! D'ya got a loicense for that?!
Depends on accent:
South West: jrink me loike a bo'oh wa'er ('=glottal stop like in "ugh")
London: drink me lyke a botto a wawtah
Merseyside: dlrinch me liche a bottull a wahtah (ch=choking sound)
You can tell this isn't real. Spiffing wasn't mentioned.
I'm disappointed that wasn't Yakkety Sax.
I'm reminded of a phenomenal interactive documentary on life in a small British town. It's called Thank Goodness You're Here.
Sufficient!
Oi, stick it in me bum and call me King, m8!
oh, a royal rogering? Back home we calls that the Glorious Revolution!
"I'm arriving",haha
That one got me.
Now we know.
Now we know.
It's like a good ol' stabbin with yer periwinkle
Thanks for the meme, but all these are real words, so it's not quite the same innit?
Is that a dude period?
Yes
I regret asking lol
This reminds me of a puzzle
You missed boo'h o'wa'er