Elon Musk: your new Tesla will drive from the factory floor, to your house 'this year'
I'm so sure that this will happen...
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Comments166https://www.tweaktown.com/news/104640/elon-musk-your-new-tesla-will-drive-from-the-factory-floor-to-house-this-year/index.htmlOpen linkView original on lemmy.world
Aka they save on delivery costs and your new car racks up miles on your own dime before you even get to drive it.
Imagine it gets into an accident lol.
Who gets charged?
If you thought insurance was expensive before....
"we planned for this edge case, and have programmed the vehicle to quickly leave the scene of any accident where a driver is not present. by accepting delivery (by purchasing a vehicle) you accept that all vehicles are sold as-is. tesla insurance customers get half-off repair claim deductibles for the first 7 days."
Surely it would be Tesla since you don't actually have possession of it, right? Right??
Tesla “FSD” switches off seconds before an accident, so this will be interesting.
Yeah, no.
That would be true if any of this self driving shit actually existed, but it doesn't. Elmo lies. A lot. About everything. So this? He's just lying again .
It does, and I've heard its safer than humans in some cases, but there's legal issues in the way. Like if a driverless car kills someone, who's fault is it?
Where do you get any of that?
No, Elmo cara do not drive themselves. On the 5 steps to full self driving, Teslas barely make it to step 2. Full self driving doesn't exist yet for any brand but most definitely not for Tesla
It’s not happening.
If it waives the destination fee, then I don't see it as a bad problem depending on how much it would normally cost to deliver vs how many miles.
Dealers: charge bullshit fee
Mftr: "get rid of this bullshit fee by racking up miles right from the factory"
Customer: "this is such a phenomenal deal!"
Do you think shipping and transportation of goods is free? Do you think truck drivers drive stuff around out of the goodness of their hearts?
Nope, but it also isn't my problem. Roll it into the price of the car, like everything else, and it can be part of the price that you can discuss and haggle over. Coming to a 50k price just to see another 1k+ this and 1.5k that tacked on is absolute bullshit.
Except that not every place is next to the car factory. Delivery to Portland, Maine is going to be a much different price in comparison to Austin, Texas. Do you also expect the cost of titling and taxes be included in the advertised price? Do you know that those vary from location to location as well?
As a European, yes. Absolutely fucking yes. I drove a Model 3 away (a while ago obviously) with all papers in order paying exactly the listed price.
In the USA taxes and titling cost different amounts depending on where you live. It's easier to calculate once you buy, especially if you are buying in another state than the one you reside in which is a big problem in my state where dealers don't stock EVs. I had to go to the nearest large city which is in another state from where I reside to get my Bolt EUV.
You can calculate before you buy and each state usually has at least a chart to ballpark what you'll pay. The easiest way to calculate these taxes would be to not levy them against people to begin with.
When did I say that every place was near an assembly line...? I said 'not my problem'. It's a company, they can figure it out.
And yes, yes I do. Again, not my problem. It's almost like different locations can set different prices or something to compensate for variables. Amazing, what a concept!
Advertising cars would never be feasible on nationally broadcast TV under your system.
They did figure out the problem though. Price set by the manufacture, show cost for delivery on the window sticker, then when you buy they car the title and tax are figured out for where you live. It's the fairest and easiest way of showing and figuring the price. If you can't figure out that window stickers are available online and the tax and title yourself before you buy, that's a you problem. It's not on the seller nor the manufacturer to post pricing for every state or municipality.
If you want cleaner pricing, demand an end to titling and car taxes.
Eh, I live <1k miles from a Tesla factory, and I wouldn't be too annoyed at having 1k miles on it when it gets to me. Knock the price down a bit since you no longer need to ship it everywhere and we're good.
We all know this isn't happening anytime soon, so I guess it's only a hypothetical. We can talk once it's a reality.
I'd want whatever the warranty was to be the same plus the miles.
So if it's 5 year 50k miles and I get it at 1k, I 'd want 5 year 51k miles.
I suppose that's fair. But you're unlikely to see much difference with 1k miles.
It doesnt waive that fee because it is a federally required fee to be applied to all vehicles regardless of their... destination. Uhg.
What? LOL You would prefer to coordinate to have someone drive you over and then drive it back home for the pleasure of...watching the miles roll over in traffic?
Ever used your eyes while driving? You've probably seen those car transport semis loaded up with new vehicles, transporting them to dealerships.
I see where the confusion from. The OP says "from the factory floor", but that was never said.
Have you never had something delivered to you before? Does the amazon driver pick you up and take you to the warehouse so you can personally pick up your package?
I don't even understand what you're trying to say. Are you under the impression that Tesla operates a concierge service that picks you up from your home?
No. What I’m saying is you can have the car delivered to you without it racking up miles by carrying it on a semi. Having it drive itself to you starts depreciation before you even get to ride in it, not to mention the warranty limits based on mileage. What you said in your original comment about expecting to be picked up so you can drive it back home is ridiculous, that's why I responded with an equally ridiculous scenario.
Okay so the car driving itself to you is ridiculous. Having someone drop you off to pick up the vehicle is ridiculous. How does the car get to your house without being ridiculous, exactly?
By being delivered on a truck? Not sure if this is a regional thing if you’re not in the US, but it’s not unusual to get a car delivered to your house on a flatbed truck or semi in the US. How do you think cars get transported around the country?
They get delivered to the dealership, not your house?
And also, who doesn't want hundreds to thousand of miles put against your warranty.
Assuming there is any reality to this (big assumption), I assume you are looking at the distance to the nearest distribution center (so Tesla "Not a dealership for legal reasons"). So a lot closer to hundred than not.
Mostly because Factory->House requires a lot of automated charging technology. Whereas Factory->Truck->Dealership->House still lets them take advantage of scale (a truck truck) and can go on a single battery charge.
Yeah, I live like 10 miles from a Tesla dealership, about 1k from a Tesla factory. If having the car drive to me is cheaper than loading it on a truck and taking it to my local dealership, I'm fine with it having 1k miles.
This is all hypothetical though. There's no way this timeframe is happening.
The shortest distance between Tesla and your house is a full circle around the country.
Also at the odometer rate of Tesla Miles, where the warranty runs out faster.
Anytime Elon says anything about Tesla with a timeframe, you can guaran damn tee that it will not happen within that time frame.
If you double it, you might actually be somewhat close to hearing a believable date for the actual time frame.
That's not going to be enough...the dude claimed "coast to coast" autonomous driving capabilities "by end of the year" back in 2016.
Earnings call is today
Ah so more market manipulation… got it. Jesus I hate this douchebag.
Yet another lie.
The shareholders should sue.
Tesla lost 6% of its value today so I'm sure Elmo felt compelled to find something to pull out of his ass.
He's always lied about the self-driving capabilities of the cars and promised timelines that have never held. Print this statement out and use it as toilet paper
But what about my Elon Musk? Sorry, I mean sensitive anus.
But who's gonna fix your wall?
It does beg the question who pays the insurance until your get it the first time. I suspect you do though.
Not only that, who will provide the cover.
[ Doubt ]
He's lying again.
You can tell because his mouth is moving.
Anyone want to take bets on how many deaths/injuries will there be before they're pulled?
Infinite is valid all things considered.
DOGE will make sure it won't be pulled. They'll shut down any administration that tries.
This LiDAR tech vs Tesla video makes me wish Tesla will use LiDAR in their self-driving Robotaxi fleet: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQJL3htsDyQ&t=556s
They won't. Musk has a hard-on for doing everything with visible cameras for some stupid reason.
Because he's cheap and didn't wanna spend the money. It's why the interior is so plain for the amount of money you spend.
Not really. I mean that would require a timeline where humanity is both stupid enough to keep Tesla around and survives indefinitely which is highly unlikely.
Infinite just means it will never be pulled for causing accidents.
Okay, in that case I guess it is possible that we are stupid enough to keep them around and stupid enough to wipe ourselves out so soon that they will be around until the end of humanity.
Yeah, I don't bet w/ human lives, I'm not an insurance company.
Add it to the list
https://elonmusk.today/
That guy is a) a relentless liar and b) absolutely insane Why would you say those things? Why contradict yourself at 20 days interval publicly?
Didn’t know that list.
Though, for all I hate the guy, there are a lot of misleading assertions in that list.
[NARRATOR]: It didn’t.
Why is the narrator always Ron Howard in my head?
Because these comments or their sentiment are usually in the style of Arrested Development
It’s Morgan Freeman for me.
I used to about some things, like when he talked about the how the spaceX rockets worked, but then he went insane. And now I've heard there's a pretty good chance that starship isn't gunna archive much at all, because its too heavy from the stainless steel they used to make it.
MY new Tesla? Doubt it. Considering I'm unemployed due to this clown administration and I don't tend to upgrade much of anything, let alone a vehicle, unless/until the old one no longer functions.
hes also still a nazi-pedo associated with epstein too.
'this year'
Sure, Elon. Lets get you back to bed.
There is no war in Ba Sing Se sorta vibes
... Even assuming the self driving tech was actually capable of doing this, which is won't be...
How would this even make any sense?
Ok, if you live within about 200 to 300 miles of a Tesla factory, ... you have this option?
Fremont, California; Sparks, Nevada; Austin, Texas; Buffalo, New York; Lathrop, California.
Outside of 250 miles ish of one of those places? No self driving delivery for you.
... And I am pretty surr not all models are made at all those locations.
Despite long ago claiming his EVs and charger network would be capable of automatically recharging or battery swapping themselves... to make a long distance journey... that ... doesn't exist, he abandoned all of that.
Even funnier: Imagine a tesla self driving from the as of yet to be completed gigafactory in Monterrey Mexico... through the border checkpoint.
The auto charger network doesn't exist, the car would murder people, cause an accident or fucking explode in the border queue... and even if none of that happened... how in the fuck is a self driving car gonna get through a militarized border crossing?
If he just gives himself a waiver via DOGE for his cars... congrats Elon, you are now a drug trafficker / arms smuggler, whether you know it or not.
... fucking lunacy.
He'll have a single car delivered this way, and there will be a Tesla robot in the driver's seat being puppeted by someone in the back seat of a Tahoe driving behind the car (they couldn't do actual remote because starlink doesn't cover the delivery area).
They'll then awkwardly film the whole thing, interview the overenthusiastic stooge they hired to "buy" the car, and fly the mission accomplished banner.
will it fall apart while en route.
He forgot to give us the point values...
I wonder what they'll offer in the Tesla rewards shop
Edit: updated into a table to clarify that I meant MINUS 100000 points, Life of one CEO is much more important to (f)Elon than lifes of us peasants.
Nah, Teslas will set themselves on fire with a family inside before it allows something like that to happen.
Yup, initially the first comment was not in a table but was a list in format "[run over]-[revard]"... Stupid me, assumed these were penalty points.
Then you changed it to the table format, I realised my mistake... And then had to learn how to put tablets to Lemmy comments (I didn't know we could do that!)
lol, glad I clarified it. I was going to leave it vague and then remembered tables.
Also, yes. Markdown is the shit and I'm glad Lemmy didn't try to reinvent the wheel!
AI trained on carmageddon
You can request your payout at a minimum of 100 points
Riiiiiiiight
Press F to doubt
F - You see it's even less likely for me to buy a tesler, than it is for them to be self driving.
Don't be so sure about that. I mean you could be tricked into buying one, blackmailed into buying one,... but for them to be actually self driving would require Elon Musk to be correct about something and that is obviously fundamentally against the laws of nature.
LoL, whoopsie doodles I accidentally bought a swasticar. I mean it's not like I haven't accidentally bought cars on at least 3 specific occasions in the past. Oh wait, it IS exactly like I've never accidentally bought a car in my life. Hmm, what are the statistics, tho? How many people have accidentally bought a car in the past? I suppose I could also win one in a raffle that someone entered me in, without my consent. A friend could just buy one for me. Anything can happen, it's just that some things are far more likely.
This is such obvious BS. Putting aside that Tesla are always making claims about self driving that they can't deliver on, let's just consider the basic logistics of doing this for any customer who lives more than about 300km from a Tesla factory (of which there are two IIRC, and one of those is in Austin and the other is in Fremont)...
How the fuck is the car going to recharge?
It's not like it's going to plug itself in, and there are no staff at Tesla supercharger stations as far as I'm aware. With the range on a typical Model S even getting to LA might be tough if it gets stuck in traffic. Fremont to LA is just under 600km if you're lucky.
It could stop at Tesla "dealerships" along the way and have the staff plug them in, or have fancy robotic chargers at just those locations. Surely there are enough "dealerships" that this is feasible for most people.
Nah, there's not that many. There's large swaths of the US where you have to drive across multiple states to get to one, in part for legal restrictions on dealerships
Yeah, I contemplated this idea, but you'd need a network of dealerships all within no more than about 450km of each other. Actually, a lot less than that if you want to deliver something like a cybertruck this way. And Tesla just doesn't have that kind of infrastructure, especially in the Midwest and South. And that means there's no good way to get a car from Fremont or Austin to anywhere on the East Coast either. At best you could maybe make this work in California.
But also consider the scale of what you're talking about. Generally you're looking at selling thousands of cars per day for a successful production model. Can their dealerships handle charging thousands of cars per day?
I think you replied to the wrong comment, but I agree
Granted, if they could actually make this work, they could probably do the robotaxi thing or even get into logistics. That would make it easily worth it to build dispatch centers basically everywhere
That is, if they could make it work
I tacked it onto your comment because I was chiming in with my agreement on your disagreement, if that makes sense.
The thing about the robotaxi thing is that it only really works as metro level infrastructure. Once you start trying to do that at a level where your vehicles can traverse whole states, the costs balloon like crazy.
You will Nazi it coming.
No it won’t.
LOL my Tesla? Nonono. The possibility of me ordering a Tesla would require so much leadership refactoring at Tesla, I'm confident this is no longer a possibility.
To put it more sussinctly:
Fuck off with this bullshit ad headline. I wouldn't touch these swasticars if they jerked me off nightly
Is that a threat?
It's irrelevant because I'm never buying anything that piece of shit touches.
It can drive itself straight to the dump
Later this year: "I was right, but I actually meant to say 'into' instead of 'to' and 'someone's' instead of 'your'"
Driver included
It’s one of those robots that’s just remote controlled by some guy in a call center.
As if the far right folks will buy an electric car and Elon burned the bridges for buyers on the left.
No, but the not as far right conservatives might. I have a cousin who bought one recently... I'm pretty sure it happened because of the Whitehouse yard sale Trump did with Musk.
I ain't buying that piece of shit if it offers blowjobs.
Not because of advancements in technology, but because of erosion of regulations.
I don't want to be caught dead driving one of those fucking nazimobiles. I would not take one even if it were free.
Not my fucking house.
"it drove right through my kitchen wall. And I hadn't even ordered one!"
Do people still care what this turd has to say?
Definitely not into my house, fucker.
Gotta save that stock price somehow. Activate investor bullshit machine.
The "next year" promise of the year...
Worked just a couple of months ago. Doubt it will this time.
Not if your home is not in USA, your new Tesla will have to pay Tariff and don't know how.
Enough musk spam...
Factory Floor is in China.
Lies
Next thing they’ll “say it will do your taxes and walk your dog”. Seriously this company is so unserious.
If they even try that it will look like that car chase scene from The Blues Brothers.
When a battered car with a mangled cyclist smashed through your wall
OH YEAH !
Everyone: Hey, I've seen this claim before! Elmo: What do you mean you've seen it? It's brand new!
Right... My favorite "promise" so far was the Tesla SpaceX edition (with rocket boosters or microjets or some shit, IDK doesn't make sense) and die-hard fans defending this PR stunt as "the car that might fly".
Elon Musk: Your new Tesla will get into a serious accident and be totaled before it even gets to your house 'this year' (and you're still liable for it)
Sure Elon. Here, have another hit of ketamine.
Soon the only ones buying Teslas will be factory workers that are forced to in order to keep their jobs. The basically live on the factory floor, so it's a pretty easy promise to fulfill.
Elump will accomplish this not by improving technology or software, but by outlawing any safety regulations that prove inconvenient.
Ha ha ha sure Elon.
To your house, through the wall, and into the living room?
“It’s dirty. Why did you deliver it dirty?”
Announced since 2014
No it won't. I'd never my money on anything supporting that fascist pig.
Bullshit.
FSD is getting people killed and somehow this same car will get any kind of “ok” to solo drive to someone’s home from the factory?
More promises by Muskrat that aren’t gonna happen.
Probably have a sales rep in the car to monitor the drive.
Jokes on him I’m never getting one
It better fuckin' not if it knows what's good for it.
What excuse can he use later?
I mean, when it turns out that it's not happening this year, and not even next year.
Any bets?
My guess: He won't be with Tesla anymore then, so all these broken promises become somebody else's problem.
I feel that spreading lies, even to make fun of them, is ultimately counter-productive. I know others disagree though.
Sure, Jan.
He means that's how long it'll hold together
kinda like elon would put a man on mars in 10 years back in 2011.
I told them I didn’t want the car delivered to my house. If they did, I would auto accept it. Even if there’s issues on it. Accept it from their dealership.
I'm sure Elon musk would hit all of his timelines if it wasn't for the Democrats or Steven Miller
Is Joe Schmoe going to have to answer for his shitbox that just plowed through a school zone with an unusual number of speed bumps? Joe hasn't even met his vehicle yet and it's gonna be out there committing crimes potentially under his name.
of course they will, all their dealerships are burnt down
It could happen, provided the cars are remotely piloted by a bunch of Indians.
Understanding Bull Pussy Unflinchingly
A Meta-Cognitive Framework for Navigating Hyper-Bullish Market Psychology
By: [Redacted]
Institute for Degenerate Financial Semiotics
April 2025
Abstract
This paper attempts to define, decode, and derive strategic utility from the crude yet revealing expression "Bull’s Pussy", as used by market participants operating in high-volatility, momentum-driven environments — most notably, finance bros, meme traders, and risk-on opportunists. Far from mere vulgarity, this term encapsulates a specific market sentiment, behavioral signal, and strategic decision point. We explore its origin, semiotic function, embedded psychology, and applicable counter- and co-strategies.
The term “Bull’s Pussy” emerges from the hyper-masculinized, aggressive vernacular of speculative finance subcultures — environments where sentiment is expressed less through rational analysis and more through primal, performative assertion.
Used as an exclamation — “BULL’S PUSSY!” — it denotes:
Important Note: The term is inherently metaphorical, not biological. Its power lies in its shock value, not its anatomical accuracy.
When shouted across trading desks or Discord servers, “Bull’s Pussy” functions as both call-to-action and tribal signal. It serves to:
Its use is performative, ironic, and occasionally nihilistic. The practitioner does not believe in the sustainability of the bull run — only in their ability to exit before collapse.
The concept operates within the psychological framework of reflexivity (à la George Soros): traders act on beliefs they know are unsustainable, thus making them temporarily true.
Here, we find a meta-cognitive paradox:
The practitioner foments irrationality by participating in it. The act of buying because others are buying becomes self-validating — until, inevitably, it doesn’t.
Thus, “Bull’s Pussy” is not a sign of market health. It is the canary in the cocaine mine — signaling the end phase of unsustainable price action.
Below are strategic responses to encountering a “Bull’s Pussy” moment:
A. The Rusher: Bigger Fool Gambit
B. The Reaper: Contrarian Short
C. The Dealer: Liquidity Provider
D. The Ghost: Strategic Exit
E. The Monk: Wait for the Fire Sale
5. Conclusion: The Erotic Death Drive of Markets
“Bull’s Pussy” is more than a phrase. It is a market moment, a shared delusion, and a behavioral archetype. It encapsulates the late-stage euphoria of a bull run that knows no rational bounds — only speed, volume, and mutual fantasy.
To act within it, one must know:
In this lies the true power of understanding “Bull’s Pussy” — not as crude noise, but as a coded market scream that something wild and unsustainable is happening.
The wise trader hears it, smirks, and then chooses their weapon.
Appendix:
No
Too late ! http://sndup.net/rffxc
Friend I made it all up, it is just a rift I openned in the latent space. Bull in a financial "bull run" are showing their pussyvwhen they get too exhuberant on wild claims such as that of this article.
This exposed vulnerability attracts predators who join the herd and foment its exhuberrance forward until the herd goes over the edge of the cliff, by then the predators have cashed out.
But "bull pussy" remains a non-sense contradiction, the farm animal known for having its intact male genital doesn't have a pussy, not even a metaphorical one
It already drove across the country by itself several years ago.