Then the Buddhist pulls out a pistol and sights it on the hot dog vendor. The vendor holds up his hands and says, "Whoa, whatever happened to inner peace?"

The Buddhist replies, "This is my inner piece."

The first time the moderators countered his obvious dog-whistle lies I was absolutely blown away. You could have knocked me over with a feather. Then I started laughing and didn't stop.

The correction was really well done and completely natural by both moderators, I almost didn't register what happened. Love to see it.

Republicans and ratfucking peace talks during an inhumane war of territorial expansion to make their political opponent look bad. Name a more iconic duo.

Op could have made worse choices overall. ATVs are pretty cool. Soil is soil. Coulda been a cubicle monkey. At least op is getting some sun.

It helps if your two choices for president aren't Father Time and the Orange Rage Demon.

If pulling forward into an empty parking space in front of your car is gay, then I guess you'd better start calling me Elton John. What the actual fuck?

If you've met a nerdy type and you think they aren't kinky in some way, it's because they've mastered masking in front of the normies. It's an essential life skill. I don't know a single kinky person who isn't a nerd or a geek, and vice versa. Full credit to this guy for living life out loud. Wish being kinky wasn't an opportunity for public shaming, but it is how it is.

This just in: Worst Vice Presidential pick in human history continues to back Russian-owned Holocaust-denying millionaire lackey. More at eleven.

Oh dip, they're demanding an answer this time. He's gonna have to respond or else they'll.... checks papers oh, they'll just demand it again. Must be nice to avoid any and all repercussions from breaking the law over and over and over again.

Cannon's ruling was that the entire concept of the DoJ appointing a special prosecutor is unconstitutional. Following that same logic, anyone who has ever been the subject of a special prosecutor investigation that was later adjudicated guilty can and should have their convictions thrown out.

That's why Hunter is saying his case should be thrown out. He was investigated by a special prosecutor on behalf of the Department of Justice. That investigator ruled he broke the law when he had the temerity to own a firearm while he was using illegal drugs, and then the case went to court.

Under Cannon's ruling, Hunter has got every right to ask for this. So does Bill Clinton for Whitewater. And the ghost of Richard Nixon for Watergate. Anyone who was ever investigated by a special prosecutor appointed by the DoJ who then faced any sort of legal consequences for their actions can now ask to have their convictions overturned on these grounds.

Cannon's ruling is a pretty intense case of throwing the baby out with the bathwater with regards to judicial procedure, and it's likely to be reversed by the appeals court. On the other hand, her ruling was only meant to delay the trial, which worked flawlessly. When her peers in the appeals court reverse the ruling and remove her from the bench for it or any other reason, look forward to seeing her as a talking head on conservative news networks. She's certainly earned her place there.

He did agree, but he's placed the Fox interview before the NBC or ABC debates. So, the plan is to do the Fox debate to roaring, paid crowds where he gets softball questions and Harris gets asked transparently sealioned questions. It'll look something like this:

Interviewer: "Mr. President Trump, sir, how did you come by all of your elite skills playing golf? How do you maintain your unearthly, jaw dropping masculinity in the face of relentless feminization by the radical left?"

T: rambling, incoherent 3 minute long speech about Harris' low IQ and how immigrants want to abort your 3 month old babies

Interviewer: "Kamala(pronounced incorrectly), why are you going to take everyone's guns away so that they can be attacked in their own homes by the gay Mafia and immigrant caravans? Why are you going to force American man to get castrated, then put their privates into a blender, and use their extracted testosterone to turn all the girl kids into boys against their will?"

There. No need to watch Fox debate now, I just summarized it for you.

Not pictured: The dynamic and eternal back-and-forth in the comments section of that article where Wikipedia purist nerds do battle with Wikipedia's cadre of silly gooses.

Purists hate that "cetacean" is used here and feel that the silly gooses are diluting the information on Wikipedia for a pun. They also complain that visitors to that page will be confused by the term, and that it will cause the social credit of Wikipedia as a whole to wane in the eyes of the world.

The gooses want the purist nerds to take a chill pill. I'm with the gooses. If the purists knew how often scribes in ancient times doodled pointless things like mounted snail combat and wildly exaggerated dick drawings on illuminated manuscripts then I'd presume they'd be okay with allowing a minor joke like this one, but I guess you can't please everyone.

This a-hole judge should be removed from the bench and fired for this. Or at least forced to undergo the same treatment.

Has this judge even been to court before? If you're not there to sue or be sued(or tried) or to watch someone for a specific reason, then court is boring as hell. Instead of punishing someone who fell asleep, congratulate those who stayed awake - that's far more worthy of notice.

They say you should only say good things about dead people. He's dead. Good.

This fucking cookie joke I knew when I saw the first one it was coming and still made me laugh.

Well, Boeing, you cut your staff and salaries to the bone, used your profits on stock buy backs & to give absurd multi-million dollar bonuses to your C-suite stuffed suits, and killed whistleblowers who try to rat on your inhumane business practices. Do you think you can figure out why you can't attract talent now, Boeing? Do ya?

There's no news on it and I have to assume it's because if that is the full unredacted email there's probably a ton of CSAM. If so it's technically illegal to own and anyone who is downloading it might be opening themselves up to arrest or legal challenges, even if they're a journalist.

I would presume IF this is a full release of the Epstein GMail account, and IF it's not a honeypot op of some kind from CIA/IDF/SVR/whoever, and IF it's legit... then this is big. Nearly all American news orgs have been gutted though, and I doubt any billionaire that owns the news orgs would be ok with having their wealthy cohort exposed.

Whoever might be investigating this would almost certainly keep quiet until all of their ducks are in a row because the second they publish, they're going to be arrested for CSAM. Unless they're in a country with no extradition treaty with the US. And even then they'll be subject to extraordinary rendition cause Trump don't care about US law, why would the lack of an extradition treaty stop him?

AIPAC Shakur? That's fucking hilarious and spot on. Well played

How bout this one: The dishes are dirty after a meal. After you eat, you stand up from your table to go do the dishes unprompted. As soon as you stand up, someone else asks you "Hey, can you do the dishes while you're up?". Immediately, you are annoyed and become resentful and don't want to do the dishes... that you were on your way to do already. Sound familiar?

The double standard of topless & male-presenting being ok but topless & female-presenting not being okay is confusing and pointless. The rule won't force anyone to go topless if they'd prefer not to. It just levels the playing field for everyone.

I've seen men with much bigger boobs than women proudly display them at every beach, lake and festival I've ever been to. Why is that ok but not ok for women? Nobody can give me a good answer that's not tied into some patriarchal, thought-terminating religious BS. Everyone should have the option to go topless, irrespective of chosen gender.