Covid just made us all realise we know a lot more people than we thought we did who would hide a zombie bite.

Wtf dude, I could have gone my whole life not knowing this. I hope your socks get wet.

Yeah my husband does this to me too. One time he was camping and texted me just a person's name with no other context. Like are you about to be murdered and this is the main suspect??

Being lucky all the time would be cool. The only time I can think it might be a hindrance would be at a casino because they'd think I'm cheating but I don't gamble so it doesn't matter I guess.

Along with rhythmic gymnastics, synchronised swimming, dressage...

I would say this is more impressive because they don't get to choose their music nor listen to it ahead of time.

Sure, just take it with a pinch of salt.

Anecdotally, I was never raised to be a wife. I'm solidly mediocre at cooking and cleaning, and have zero interest in kids. My husband was raised by lesbians and is a wonderful partner. He loves to tell people that he taught me how to do laundry.

I'm trying to disabuse my husband of the notion that moissanite looks “fake” because of its refractory properties. I just like the sparkles, I'm not trying to pass it off as a diamond. It's an entirely different stone.

Nah it's just people, doesn't matter if they're famous. I used to work in a law office and the family and estate cases were the absolute worst. Some people just turn into vile cretins when someone dies. Give me a good old criminal case any day over that nonsense.

Aggressive queueing.

Why should someone be obligated to live as long as they can, at the expense of their quality of life?

I have a friend with a terminal illness who opted for MAID. I'm so thankful that option was available because he was in so much pain at the end. It makes a huge difference to be able to choose a dignified death, surrounded by people you love and who love you.

I once went on a school trip and practically the whole plane was filled with students. Must have sucked to have been the six other random people.

The number of skin cancer clinics I saw in Australia was alarming.

A kid once asked to pet my dog and I said no. Kid then proceeded to tell me my dog looked evil. I was enraged. She is a dog, she can't be evil, and she's absolutely terrified of strangers but especially kids.

Usually when I have to deny people petting this dog, I'll offer to let them pet the other dog who's normal, but fuck that kid, you don't get to pet any dog today.

Nope, dating someone who could possibly be my reincarnated partner is too much. It's just inviting paranormal hijinks into my life and I don't need that.

Batman and Robin. I KNOW it's cheesy as hell but I was a kid and I loved it. I loved the aesthetic of Gotham but found the previous Batman villains too scary (Penguin, Two Face) but Mr Freeze and Poison Ivy weren't scary at all. It was a romp!

I told my husband he must now be this dramatic when we're out of onions or what is he even doing with his life?

I am absolutely not telling my parents how late I stayed up last night. They're not even in the country but I don't need to feel them judging me from over there.

Imo anyone who doesn't feel free in a marriage is doing it wrong. Compromise is for things like getting orange juice with some pulp because one likes lots and the other likes none, not compromising who you fundamentally are as a person.

Don't marry someone who doesn't appreciate the quirks that make you you.

A friend of mine just bought a Toyota tundra and it's too long to fit in his garage. Honestly I never would have thought that'd be something you need to check first.

Wtf? That is super gross. I'm Canadian and I don't know anyone who would do it at the dinner table. I've seen my boss do it at his desk but he turns to face the corner next to his desk first.

Ime most people go to the washroom to do it, or at least make sure they're not near anyone else.