We're a scientific institution and as a scientific institution, we are just following science that states that women are less capable than men!

Science doesn't support this, actually.

Well it would if you'd just let us sabotage women's grades.

Yours obviously. Terrible design and awful colour choice. Not completely surprising from such a backwards country but I have to admit you raised the ugliness bar to a whole new level. Matches well with your ridiculous anthem and your stupid traditions (incest and cannibalism are still a thing I've heard).

My country on the other hand... now that's some nice flag design: good palette, great inspiration, high symbolic value. Very nice. Pairs well with our melodic anthem and our respectable traditions (like ritual 'feast of the elders' and ceremonial family acts of love)

I'm in!

No actually I'm out.

Strike that. I'm in. Definitely.

Emma is live with us from Crewe. Emma, I hear the train station is near the tracks?

Absolutely Harry, the tracks literally go through the station.

And the train will travel on the tracks, through the station?

Yes Harry, it should be there in less than 30 minutes.

Thank you Emma, we will come back to you. Now, we have Jen who is still in Manchester. Jen, the train left the station on time apparently?

Hello Harry, sorry I can't hear you over the sound of Andy Burnham's train leaving the station. The train is leaving now with 2 minutes delay due to the hordes of journalists blocking the train.

So this is exclusive from the BBC: Andy Burnham's train is leaving with 2 minutes delay. I have Nigel Trainsworth here in the studio with me. Nigel you are the BBC's train boffin. Why did the train leave with this 2 minutes delay?

Well Harry, the train driver cannot start the train if journos...

Sorry to interrupt you Nigel, we come back to Manchester with Jen. Jen, you wanted to report on something urgently.

Yes Harry, the train is blue and yellow. This just came to me.

Thank you Jen, I will ask our political editor Michael Politico about the significance of this information. Michael?

Yes. Hello Harry. You see, yellow is historically the colour of mustard and chips and also butter. So in Burnham's case...

Bande dessinée (= illustrated strip? Something like that)

- Hey dude, you know you had two goats? Well, I took one

- Whatever I still have one goat left

- Hey dude, you know you had one single goat? Well, I took it

- Wtf, that doesn't make sense

👆 real dialogues recorded by actual ancient Greeks

'Mangled face' Harry from Luton, yeah? A very nice chap, I remember him dearly. Always carrying his wife in his arms! What a number.

🇬🇷 (4G only) and 🇷🇸 (4G only) have me cackling, too

Much peace, very ceasefire

Charles Wredford-Brown

I think it would have been more believable if the guy had been called Sir Nigel Britishman-Worcestershiresauce

This is a joke name surely

Precisely. It was called soccer as a joke

Plot twist: the person talking in the first panel is the Linux booth owner

That guy's name?

33 KB JPG

I am even more disappointed by that guy's choice to work only 6 days a week.

I do not believe in sleep or rest.

I firmly believe that CEOs require diapers, not toilet breaks.

I used to shit myself continuously at the office, the stench was unbearable. And yet I went on, staying at my desk, asking people to come in to berate them.

I chose to be estranged by my whole family. My kids hate me. My wife despises me. My father won't talk to me. Even my mother loathes me.

I managed all that by dedicating every second of my life to my job, so that I can die miserably and get a gravestone saying 'lmao the shitman's dead, rest in shit loser'.

And additional question: even if it was technically feasible, was it really ethical to surgically implant Hitler's cloned brained into the body of a silverback gorilla and make it fight against Tigerstalin?

understand something about risk that everyone else doesn't

Ah yes understanding that you are immune to risk because you are astronomically loaded

But why? Is it because of Biden? Please don't explain it to me.

They're going to take your job.

🤓📚🤚🦋 Is this an empathetic message?

I wonder why everyone hates CEOs

"2025: during the great war against the gays and windfarms, the president successfully strikes a masterful blow to his enemies by closing the twitter account of a Mars robot"