I did something like this once. I was meeting a friend at a bar and she was with another guy I never met. I had just moved back to the US from Germany, so she introduced me and said "he just moved here from Germany," not realizing that it wasn't clear I was American. So he starts asking me how I like it here etc, and I threw on a German accent and went with it (I speak some German too). I pretended that my English was a bit rough but could get by.

We hung out for like two hours and then when I got ready to leave I dropped the accent and said in my normal Midwestern American voice "Ok cool to hang with you bro imma head out," and left.

Haha, guilty. I went to mindlessly pull up RIF at about 7 pm CT and it wasn't loading comments, then I went oh, right, UTC it's midnight. And now two hours later here I am on lemmy

Nightmare fuel right there

Someone has read up on the Simple Sabotage Field Manual

I worked at an office once where the wifi legitimately got worse when it rained. It was because the buildings internet used an antenna instead of being wired, and the building was just barely in range of the source signal. When it rained, it was enough added distortion to make it noticeably worse.

I used to own a Subaru Forester in Ohio. I sold it to a lesbian who was moving to CO. Felt like I was giving it a better home

Ok who had early June in the "when will Musk flame out of the Trump regime" pool?

I do this too. It took a while for my wife to fully understand that if she wanted to try something on my plate, she better not wait til the last few bites

My brother in law has ADHD. He lives next door to me.

He has a car he parks on the street. In my city you're required to get a registration sticker for your car, it's like $100 or something, good for a year. Every day you don't have a valid sticker you can get a new ticket on your car. It takes two minutes to go online and order a new one.

For the last three years, hes been racking up tickets on his car for an expired sticker. One a week roughly, $60 per ticket I think. He usually lets them pile up until he gets final notices then pays them all online at double the cost.

Twice now he's has his car booted, then impounded, due to unpaid tickets. He even includes tickets on his car as part of budgeting. I've offered a couple times if he'd hand me his license to go online and order the sticker for him. I've stopped offering since that offer is met with intense anger.

It takes TWO MINUTES to go online and order a new one. Poor guy

I love how all this dark shit comes out of the happiest country in the world

Me, a heathen, explaining how my family does Easter to my Jewish wife:

"We dye eggs and hide them then eat a bunch of chocolate and jellybeans."

"Wtf? Why"

"I dunno"

I'm an American who speaks decent German. I've gotten this flak traveling in non-German speaking Europe - Stupid American only speaking English attitude thrown my way. Mother fucker I'm in France, a German would also be using English here. To some people the only way to not be "that American" is to speak all the languages.

On the flip side, I've had a few Germans ask me why I bothered learning their language when I could just use English.

Welp that's enough Internet for me today

A big part of my job is API integrations. The most infuriating one I deal with is a startup who keeps adding new properties with property names randomly being pascal case, camel case, or snake case. Especially when the same property is one case on a request model and different on the response.

I, too, have a small child

I wanna know what the rules of the game were

I prefer "Rapist Who Wanted Vice President Dead Stumbles and Gets Confused in Speech Again" personally

My wife coaches high school field hockey. She told me how one day she overheard them talking about how one of them lost their work on a homework document and had to start over.

One of the girls said "you just gotta get in the habit of clicking the blue square", which the others were confirming is the thing to do. So then my wife asks "blue square, what do you mean" and another clarified "the save button".

They had no idea what a floppy disc was

My friend was going for a run one day in the park holding her phone in her hand which she was using to play music. A guy jumped out at her and karate chopped her arm which held the phone, but she didn't drop it. He stood there kind of perplexed what to do next, as did she. Then she said "SERIOUSLY??", which kind of woke the guy up again. He started to reach into his pocket for something, so she turned around and bolted. The guy didn't chase her.