Spyke

It doesn't produce them. It simply emits them. The whole body produces them as a collective effort.

1

OP's can't produce condensates, plasma, or any of the ~45 niche exotic states of matter?

5
slrpnk.net

Pretty sure mine produced a 4th after eating that hot sauce the other night

12
muusemuusereply
sh.itjust.works

No. I refuse to click. I can only imagine it’s cartoon bicycle pump nonsense even though it’s likely some cursed fetish shit.

You will not inflict this upon me.

5

Its... a guy with a bike pump up his ass for the first half of the video and the second half is him bare ass farting after removing the pump. Kinda surprising to see on youtube TBH. The look of surprise on his face says it was his first rodeo.

3
fedia.io

If your ass can shit out Plasma or a Bose-Einstein Condensate, you ought to go to hospital

96

Do you suffer from chronic M-Brane inflammation?

Try Quaternio today!

Untangles those bothersome hyperdimensional knots.

Quaternio!

It'll make your stomach turn, but in a good way.

Disclaimer:

QuaternioIsNotVerifiedToBeEffectiveAgainstTimeCrystalsOrSuperCriticalSuperFluids.IfYouSufferFromOrExperienceOrHaveBeenPreviouslyDiagnosedWithIntestinalTimeCrystalsOrSuperCriticalSuperFluidShartsDoNotUseQuaternio.

2

Enough Scoville's and your ass will be burning brighter than the sun in the middle of July

3

I've just never had a spicy shit, but I eat hotter stuff than literally anyone I have ever met in person before. I'll leave my hot sauces in the community fridge up at work and no one will use them because they know it will melt their faces off, but it's what I splash on my pizza or sandwich or chicken or whatever.

2
aeioureply
piefed.social

You need only add a lighter to get ass-plasma.

A Bec would be trickier, though.

8
Th4tGuyIIreply
fedia.io

Good point. Does a Tool Assisted Shit (aka. a TAS) plasma shit count?

3

This is quite the rap sheet you’ve got here.

It says you served 20 years for “man’s laughter.”

Must have been quite the joke.

-- Frank Drebin Jr.

6
UNY0Nreply
feddit.org

I found a new entry for the bucket list: ass plasma!

11
Tiresiareply
slrpnk.net

I hate in courtrooms when the prosecutor produces a witness and everyone has to wait nine months.

18
Akasazhreply
lemmy.world

Lovely vignette, I'd argue that courtrooms could do with a bit of sexy times.

But following that logic your ass can produce dick, too.

6
9point6reply
lemmy.world

Is neon toxic to eat in large quantities?

(I know it's inert, toxic might be the wrong word, I'm more going for would bad things happen)

5

In quantities you could 'eat' naturally, without injecting it in by force? Yeah, I think that would be entirely safe. (Though you wouldn't want to breathe exclusively neon.)

But, almost all of any gasses you manage to get into your stomach will be expelled as burps. Very little will make it through your entire digestive system and out the other end. If you want neon gas coming out of your ass (I presume to use in conjunction with some electrodes and a power supply to produce actual plasma), you're going to need ... alternate means of ingesting the neon. The simplest and least invasive way would be to stick a tube up your ass and pump neon gas into it through that tube. For your own safety, ensure that the maximum pressure on that gas line is very low. You do not want a ruptured colon. That would hurt. Plus, the neon gas would escape.

Also, even if successful, I wouldn't recommend it. Plasma is, you know, hot. And assholes don't like being very hot.

10

What to say after you fart in a crowd (or elevator).

“Take that!”

“What do you say?” like prompting a child to say thank you.

"That'll be five bucks, you pervert"

“Not a bad sound out of a half inch speaker”

“Did you hear that spider bark?"

“Someone step on a duck?”

"That duck's got bad breath"

Forest Area Reticulated Tree Spiders (FARTS)

“A bit more choke and that engine will start”

“Did you hear what that asshole just said?”

“There’s someone behind me talking shit!”

“Keep shouting Sir, we'll find you”

"So sayeth the King"

“I shouldn't have trusted that one”

"I don't remember eating that."

“That’s gonna itch when it dries”

''Two sniffs of that would be greedy''

“The the horns working, now try the lights”

“Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk”

“The Rear Admiral has spoken”

(Just before you fart) “Alexa, play something by Ed Sheeran”

 “Don’t worry, (name), I’ll tell them it was me!”

“You’ve/I’ve got a turd honking for the right of way.”

“Ahh, the ghost of dinners past”

“You got that one for free, next one you will have to pull my finger”

"As foretold by The Prophecy."

“Now your turn”

The toothless one speaks !

“Sounds much better after my tune up”

“Aaaand...scene!”

“That was supposed to be a song but came out of the wrong end”

“Message from turd castle”

“Glad I'm not in my Space Suit”

“Damn! I was saving that for the elevator”

“An empty house is better than a bad tenant”

“Guess what I had for my last meal”

“This haaause is noww cleeeean”

“carpet frogs”

“Now that I have your attention, we will have a moment of silence for all those that have died in elevator accidents”

11

So can the stomach, sometimes both of them can do all at the same time.

11
TBi
lemmy.world

Can it really produce solids though? Just seems like a really viscous liquid…

4

You must eat enough fiber. Try being dehydrated and eat nothing but meat for a week. You can build a house out of those what you will produce.

4
autriyoreply
feddit.org

If you ask a material scientist, glass is also just a very viscous liquid.

4
Triumphreply
fedia.io

No it's not.

The thing about old glass is that the manufacturing process was different and produced glass with variable thickness.

4

Old glass being thicker at the bottom, isn't what was referring to.

Maybe its a bit of a technicality, but since glass doesn't form a crystal lattice, one could argue that its just a liquid which has an infinitely high viscosity. Hence its very viscous.

2
Björnreply
swg-empire.de

We need a +50 years shitdrop experiment to prove that all shit is liquid!

8
lemmy.ca

Your ass, genitals, and mouth can all produce all three states of matter.

4
lemmy.ca

Yup. There are a few medical conditions that can cause you to fart through your urethra. UTIs, and damage to your bowel mainly.

3

And honestly, it is needed when the body is in “immediate alert mode” and need to expel dangerous substances.

2
lemmy.ml

I think the sphincter or something can even detect whether its gaseous or solid (but not liquid) and probably the reason why sharts exist.

If there is some anal captain out there, please help me out.

3