Unfortunately I've seen the kids use an entire role for who the fuck knows, in the time between my toilet breaks. I have to make sure there's at least 4 spare roles at the beginning of the weekend. Even then sometimes they just ball it up, wet it, and stick it to the cocking ceiling.
A lovely idea but my flat is small and my children, insane. Height is absolutely no obstacle to any except the one year old. You should see the sort of parkour shit the 4 year old is capable of.
I am on a dorm, so my TP consumption is high.
Lemme explain:
So, there's a bunch of people using the same toilet, meaning it's quite gross. Additionally, it is very clear people don't bother to put the seat up, and just piss over it.
So, first wipe off everything that can be wiped off dry, then spray it with 70% isopropyl alcohol (and there's also like 1% H2O2 if it didn't decompose because that's (3%) also cheap and more available than distilled water to dilute the IPA) , let it be soaked for at least 30 seconds, then wipe it, then let the room air out because the vapors are quite strong, and then I still cover the seat with toilet paper because that's not as good as I like.
Preferably I'd be using bleach (sodium hypochlorite), but that's a little too inconvenient.
But I feel like the only thing that can sanitize this building is a nuclear bomb.
Back on college we used to steal soap and toilet paper from the business school to save money. I was not a business major, i just ised to go in and take it
Everything in urine is necessarily water soluble. Tap water followed by isopropyl for the bacteria and you're good to go. Apart from a sheet on top of the water to prevent Poseidon's kiss.
TOTO is the most gentle and most reliable. I bought mine in Japan 15 years ago and it's still working like it was new.
The 2 extra features outside of the norm is the heated seat and what I call the constipation spray. It's a narrow spray that sprays warm water up your butt and helps get the poop out. Haha.
I'll never go back, but all interested souls should be made aware of the bidet-user's curse: Using bathrooms that don't have them becomes a harrowing experience
I also find that a warm bidet helps me get more poop out. So after thinking I'm done, I spray and about to finish and then more poop comes out. It's a game changer.
Bro, buy a portable travel bidet. The downside of those portable bidet is the water volume that you're used to is significantly less. So sometimes I'll bring a empty water bottle to refill after I deplete the water reservoir.
Based on your username (Finnish word for boot) you can't really complain, as there's literally bidet showers in practically all public loos in Finland. With the exception of toilets in a night club you should pretty easily be able to shit whenever and still be able to bidet shower.
Although to be fair the gas-station tp is goddamn horrible for drying your crack. Although it's equally as bad at absorbing shit, so you know, dealers choice.
But yeah, you halt always wait. I've had to shoot liquid shit out of my arse at -20 in an outhouse. But if I have the option, I'd prefer an indoor toilet and warm water to clean myself instead of paper.
Just get a bidet like a civilized person. Tp is gross and wipes (the only actual way to clean the shit off your ass instead of just painting a thin tissue brown) are horrible.
I also wouldn't be proud of how little tp your dry shits take, you just kinda sound dehydrated.
Eh, maybe. In my many years on this planet I have noticed that women really do, on average, use a fuck ton of toilet paper. Even more anecdotally, when I got divorced my toilet paper use decreased by 90%.
As a South East Asian, we clean our ass with water and soap. The first time I pooped outside of home was when I was a toddler during school. The restroom next to my classroom had a tap water and a bucket with "dipper" (according to translation, that's what it's called). We would wash our nethers by scooping the water with "dipper" from the bucket and then clean our hole with soap. It was awkward doing it outside of home, and I have mentally trained my mind to avoid pooping outside of home. Weirdly enough, it worked because I only feel that "terrible need" when at home. A dad's friend also has the same mindset as me. While driving us home, my friend told his dad there are public toilets he could use if he really needs it badly. The dad said he doesn't want to poop outside the house.
The second and last time I pooped outside of home was years ago as an adult at work. Emigrating to Europe, I had to use toilet tissue, but I felt dirty not cleaning my asshole with water and soap. Good thing it was near the end of my shift at that time and went home shortly.
For what's worth, I was born and raised in a country where toilet paper is usually all you have to work with and even I don't think that's very hygienic.
There are bidets and Japanese automated bidet toilets available to be installed. But as South Park noted, many parts of the world still use toilet paper because of propaganda from big toilet paper!
I'm from a country which does have bidet showers pretty much by default (you can even find them in public loos almost all the time) and now that I've gotten used to washing my ass, toilet paper just isn't enough.
Like if I fell into shit arms first, I wouldn't be satisfied with grabbing a towel and rubbing my arms and hands. I'd want water and soap and lots of scrubbing.
And then it bobs on top of the surface of the water like the saddest, most persistent log you’ve ever seen, until you drown it with piss some hours later. Terrible for your pipes. Do not recommend
I mean if it's a very good stool and you're in a good squat almost with your heels up, I might genuinely just check with the nameless finger at that point (wouldn't do it at home I've water). Then wash hands properly. If it's more sticky idk. Hobble over trousers down to the next booth?
But yeah when I have a shit in public I n usually take a stall with a bidet shower. Or at least check there's tp. And if it's such a rush you can't even, then a crinkly paper is probably just gonna make it worse.
61 replies
Not sure what I'd do in a public toilet.
At home though, a lesson learned long ago: the whole pack of tp rolls has its place right next to the bowl, right under my eyes.
Unfortunately I've seen the kids use an entire role for who the fuck knows, in the time between my toilet breaks. I have to make sure there's at least 4 spare roles at the beginning of the weekend. Even then sometimes they just ball it up, wet it, and stick it to the cocking ceiling.
Store some rolls higher up but near the toilet if you can, the little ones cant use what they cant reach so youll always have a safety backup
A lovely idea but my flat is small and my children, insane. Height is absolutely no obstacle to any except the one year old. You should see the sort of parkour shit the 4 year old is capable of.
As a former monkey child i understand, good luck during the fire phase!
My own fire phase was challenging and lasted for about a decade. I know what to expect.
I am on a dorm, so my TP consumption is high.
Lemme explain:
So, there's a bunch of people using the same toilet, meaning it's quite gross. Additionally, it is very clear people don't bother to put the seat up, and just piss over it.
So, first wipe off everything that can be wiped off dry, then spray it with 70% isopropyl alcohol (and there's also like 1% H2O2 if it didn't decompose because that's (3%) also cheap and more available than distilled water to dilute the IPA) , let it be soaked for at least 30 seconds, then wipe it, then let the room air out because the vapors are quite strong, and then I still cover the seat with toilet paper because that's not as good as I like.
Preferably I'd be using bleach (sodium hypochlorite), but that's a little too inconvenient.
But I feel like the only thing that can sanitize this building is a nuclear bomb.
Back on college we used to steal soap and toilet paper from the business school to save money. I was not a business major, i just ised to go in and take it
Everything in urine is necessarily water soluble. Tap water followed by isopropyl for the bacteria and you're good to go. Apart from a sheet on top of the water to prevent Poseidon's kiss.
Join the bidet gang.
I started my bidet life with those cheap ones that only spray regular water. It's honestly all you really need.
And where have you ended up on your journey? What are nice features to have? Any good brands?
TOTO is the most gentle and most reliable. I bought mine in Japan 15 years ago and it's still working like it was new.
The 2 extra features outside of the norm is the heated seat and what I call the constipation spray. It's a narrow spray that sprays warm water up your butt and helps get the poop out. Haha.
I'll never go back, but all interested souls should be made aware of the bidet-user's curse: Using bathrooms that don't have them becomes a harrowing experience
I also find that a warm bidet helps me get more poop out. So after thinking I'm done, I spray and about to finish and then more poop comes out. It's a game changer.
I don't want to carry one around to public toilets
Bro, buy a portable travel bidet. The downside of those portable bidet is the water volume that you're used to is significantly less. So sometimes I'll bring a empty water bottle to refill after I deplete the water reservoir.
I'm definitely not carrying a bidet around on my day to day hah
I don't either. I have one for my work. When I go on vacation, I bring that same portable one.
Try shitting at home
I mean you don't always have the option of holding it in until you're home
Based on your username (Finnish word for boot) you can't really complain, as there's literally bidet showers in practically all public loos in Finland. With the exception of toilets in a night club you should pretty easily be able to shit whenever and still be able to bidet shower.
Although to be fair the gas-station tp is goddamn horrible for drying your crack. Although it's equally as bad at absorbing shit, so you know, dealers choice.
Ari Shaffir Bobby Lee Shit Car Story
But yeah, you halt always wait. I've had to shoot liquid shit out of my arse at -20 in an outhouse. But if I have the option, I'd prefer an indoor toilet and warm water to clean myself instead of paper.
thank the rules i've never had to do this.
if you ever get in such an emergency, best to use just another tissue, or a towel, and if all that isn't there, sock i guess?
Bidet gang 😎💦
Bidet Gang 😤
je so' ppazzo, ho 'no suonno: 'no bbidetto!
I've done it plenty times in public restrooms. You learn to be efficient.
As a man, I have my TP usage measured out. 2 sheets (folded) per wipe. Repeat as necessary.
Wife moves in. TP roll eaten by unknown creatures on a daily basis.
There are people in the world who wrap their whole hand in multiple layers of paper for every wipe
Just get a bidet like a civilized person. Tp is gross and wipes (the only actual way to clean the shit off your ass instead of just painting a thin tissue brown) are horrible.
I also wouldn't be proud of how little tp your dry shits take, you just kinda sound dehydrated.
I'm surprised that you can read this post given how far up your own ass your head is. Did you have a crystal chandelier installed?
If you had to grab shit off the floor, afterwards would you be content in wiping your hands with a paper towel?
You're just like one of those middle-ages people who believed the church when they said bathing is evil.
Do you.. do you not wash your hands after you poop? Gross.
Do you not wash your arse after having a shit?
Dehydration can affect mood, you'll be happier if you drink more water.
Weird to gender this tbh
Eh, maybe. In my many years on this planet I have noticed that women really do, on average, use a fuck ton of toilet paper. Even more anecdotally, when I got divorced my toilet paper use decreased by 90%.
Women use TP every time they pee, it's not just pooping. This particular thread of comments reads like an episode of the Honeymooners.
I do too though. I'm not a barbarian that can live with piss dribble in my pants
The fact that you think this is equivalent again proves my point, I'd imagine most of you have lived with women, but have you actually talked to them?
Exactly! I though it was common sense
As a South East Asian, we clean our ass with water and soap. The first time I pooped outside of home was when I was a toddler during school. The restroom next to my classroom had a tap water and a bucket with "dipper" (according to translation, that's what it's called). We would wash our nethers by scooping the water with "dipper" from the bucket and then clean our hole with soap. It was awkward doing it outside of home, and I have mentally trained my mind to avoid pooping outside of home. Weirdly enough, it worked because I only feel that "terrible need" when at home. A dad's friend also has the same mindset as me. While driving us home, my friend told his dad there are public toilets he could use if he really needs it badly. The dad said he doesn't want to poop outside the house.
The second and last time I pooped outside of home was years ago as an adult at work. Emigrating to Europe, I had to use toilet tissue, but I felt dirty not cleaning my asshole with water and soap. Good thing it was near the end of my shift at that time and went home shortly.
For what's worth, I was born and raised in a country where toilet paper is usually all you have to work with and even I don't think that's very hygienic.
There are bidets and Japanese automated bidet toilets available to be installed. But as South Park noted, many parts of the world still use toilet paper because of propaganda from big toilet paper!
Where I'm from, your "noggin" is your head. Which makes your comment very confusing. Did you mean "nethers" instead?
Correction noted. I mean nether 🤣
I'm from a country which does have bidet showers pretty much by default (you can even find them in public loos almost all the time) and now that I've gotten used to washing my ass, toilet paper just isn't enough.
Like if I fell into shit arms first, I wouldn't be satisfied with grabbing a towel and rubbing my arms and hands. I'd want water and soap and lots of scrubbing.
So whys would be any different for my arse
And then it bobs on top of the surface of the water like the saddest, most persistent log you’ve ever seen, until you drown it with piss some hours later. Terrible for your pipes. Do not recommend
first time i failed my driving test I went to the mall, to a massive shite, and there's was no tp, you can guess where the "Failed" paper ended up in.
How does a crunchy A4 help in you cleaning your ass?
better than nothing. it's a shitty revenge, but that's all i had
I honestly feel like it might be worse than nothing, just spreading it around like a knife does peanut butter. Zero absorption.
what the fuck would you have done in that situation? sacrifice a sock? i had sandals
Well to be a bit rude, I think I would've planned ahead. But then again, I have been caught with awful diarrhea when ice-fishing, so I do empathise.
If you want a genuine answer on what I would've done, it'd probably depend on the type of shit it was.
Although it's not gonna anything much better, but it'll affect how I'd react.
Plan ahead? You've never found yourself in a stall without tp?
also, I'm not bringing up the Bristol chart for a shit I had in 2008
I mean if it's a very good stool and you're in a good squat almost with your heels up, I might genuinely just check with the nameless finger at that point (wouldn't do it at home I've water). Then wash hands properly. If it's more sticky idk. Hobble over trousers down to the next booth?
But yeah when I have a shit in public I n usually take a stall with a bidet shower. Or at least check there's tp. And if it's such a rush you can't even, then a crinkly paper is probably just gonna make it worse.
*Takes out sandpaper*
To this day one of my favorite scenes
The fuck did I just watch? That was pretty funny.
Sauce?
The Artist has an account here I get them from there.
I like this artist's style. Reminds me a lot of Kohta Hirano.