For real. Came into work for six months and talked to this dude about a bunch of stuff every time. Only a week ago did I find out his name. Now I can finally say his name instead of starting off with "hey bro"
At least you remember names. Someone can tell me their name, I'll repeat it as suggested, forget it a few days later anyway.
I'll remember a phone number before someone's name.
Hell, I remember one dude as initials + his age when I met him. I don't know why. Example: If I met John Doe aged 32, there's a chance I'd remember him as "JD32", and forget his actual name.
Shout-out to MK22, I forgot your name again.
I have a friend who has a lot of friends. Sometimes we hangout together, but rarely. I cannot for the life of me remember their names and I swear 3 of them look the fucking same to me. It's always a struggle to keep pretending for hours until I finally hear someone call one of them by name. I remember that for a few hours. If we hangout again next day it resets out of my head again.
Jfc, if you knew how long it has taken me to know the names of some of my friends, and not just work friends or gym friends, it would be absurd.
Hell, even after months of hanging with someone, you might not know their last name; it's all "hey, I'm zipper". Why zipper? "I dunno, you know how it is". Yeah, I feel that. Anyway, went a beer, zip?
My chronic pain/disability support group shares space with an autism support group. Not a single one of the autism group knows my actual name afaik, but we'll hang out down the road at a diner some nights as a mixed group when we're meeting at the same time. It's all "hey, beard!" And "sasquatch, wanna see my cat?" And sometimes just "man". I've known some of them for years and we don't know each other's actual names. A couple of them, I've been to their house, and vice versa, and we don't know each others last name at all.
One guy in specific came over, heard my wife call out my name and was confused as hell because my name sounds like a regular word and thought it was a different nickname. Asked for the story behind it, and I had to show him my driver's license because he thought I was fucking with him. We'd had dinner together at the diner dozens of times.
After fucking around for a while turned into being exclusive for about six months, the woman who is now my wife realized that we didn't know each other's last names. If she hadn't brought it up it's hard to tell how long I would have gone not knowing.
I have ADHD (+ other stuff) and so names has always been a massive issue for me. A few years ago I just stopped trying because I don't talk to most people anyways.
out of the ~25 people in this class with me right now (fun fact! I am breaking a law by being on my phone rn :3) I know the name of,
1: teacher
2: girl with pink hair
3: trans friend
4: person who sits next to me and cannot understand what a function is to save his life
5: someone who I sat next to in 3rd grade
The others, no earthly idea. I have COWORKERS in this class who I don't know their name 😓
I spent more than 4 years working in a place were I just knew the names of the 10 people immediately around me. People kept talking about person X or Y from another floor or room and I had absolutely no fucking idea who they were talking about.
So I travel all over for work at different places. I'll start telling a story about something that happened three weeks ago to a coworker. "Oh yeah, where were you at?" Me- blank stare half the time.
Sometimes it comes to me after a few seconds, sometimes I can't even remember which state I was in.
I used to be awful with names but I got better at that. Still below average, but better. I do have ADHD for what that's worth.
2 things that make it a little bit easier to remember other people's names is repeating the name of the person after he/she just said it and trying to associate with another person you know that has the same name. It's not perfect but it's better than forgetting every single time.
I have ADHD (+ other stuff) and so names has always been a massive issue for me. A few years ago I just stopped trying because I don't talk to most people anyways.
winter break starts tomorrow, I finished pretty much all my work last week. My school makes winter break start next week because of the way the semesters line up.
I was forced to spend 3 hours in the gym today watching a students vs teachers basketball game.
The most work I've done in the last 3 days is roll a die and draw a snowman depending on those numbers then doing math to figure out the chances of the ordering of them in AP Comp-Sci Principles lol
I appreciate the message though. I try to understand all the information I can, even if I'm horrible at Spanish 2 and English 😭
on the bright side, this is the last time I get to say "see ya next year" (I'm a senior in HS)
Enjoy winter break. If you aren't going to college (and I wouldn't recommend it for most people), this will be the last time you have that much free time unless you live long enough, and make enough money, to retire. Well unless you have a wealthy and generous family. Congratulations if that's the case, you won the birth lottery!
Sorry to be such a downer. I forget there are high school kids on Lemmy. For what it's worth I'm sorry about climate change, but that's largely the fault of my elders and the corporations that control the government.
When I was around 20yo, I spent a summer with a new group of friends pretending I knew everyone's names. It was anxiety hell. Today, I realize that I can just admit that I forget names and ask and it's no problem. But that was an interesting summer.
I have a friend who is a legend. If I've been hanging out with someone he will ask their name and if I don't know then he will introduce himself to them ask their name then tell me. Saved me so many times.
most names are made-up anyways, and i can't remember made-up stuff. there has to be something profound about it or i forget it
actually i have adopted a hobby of just giving people new names (yeah i know it could be seen as disrespectful but for me it's just a normal way of doing things) and then calling them by that name. yes, it has led to confusion in the past. but it just feels like the proper thing to do. (yes you can call me weird and no i won't take it as an insult.)
also, there's this weird phenomenon that when i make up a new name for somebody, somehow that's much easier to remember. and if i do forget and make up a new name again, that new name will often be the same as the first time. so there seems to be something "recognizable" or "fundamental" about it.
Once sat at the same table as another guy in high school every weekday for six months. We traded less than ten words in that time. Later we became great friends.
Yeah. "My boy from the bar, the one with the anime girl car..." or whatever is how my stories to my wife would go. If told to a general audience the pii would be removed.
i think names are an exception and only reserved for rare occurrences. honestly, i wouldn't mind if people didn't have names in general. just call everyone "child" "man" or "hey you" depending on their appearance. names are a weird concept to me. it's not natural that people have names, i guess.
This is the correct way to do friendships. Drag doesn't agree with the forced intimacy of learning someone's name the same day you meet them. Names should be shared the third time you meet someone. Of course sometimes it's necessary to learn names earlier or later, but the default should be third.
A month? I've known guys for years and still don't know their names and it is WAY too late to ask.
That’s when you figure out a reason to hand them a clipboard and say, “Imma need you to sign in.”
This is not correct. We wait until someone else says their name.
Yep.
For real. Came into work for six months and talked to this dude about a bunch of stuff every time. Only a week ago did I find out his name. Now I can finally say his name instead of starting off with "hey bro"
At least you remember names. Someone can tell me their name, I'll repeat it as suggested, forget it a few days later anyway.
I'll remember a phone number before someone's name.
Hell, I remember one dude as initials + his age when I met him. I don't know why. Example: If I met John Doe aged 32, there's a chance I'd remember him as "JD32", and forget his actual name.
Shout-out to MK22, I forgot your name again.
I just remember faces for 20 years, no clue about their names.
I have a friend who has a lot of friends. Sometimes we hangout together, but rarely. I cannot for the life of me remember their names and I swear 3 of them look the fucking same to me. It's always a struggle to keep pretending for hours until I finally hear someone call one of them by name. I remember that for a few hours. If we hangout again next day it resets out of my head again.
Could you possibly have face blindness?
As long as you didn't meet anyone named Martin Swanson at age 13..
Meet my friends R2D2 and C3P0
I sometimes make a note with someone's name and brief description that sticks to me.
it's been 5yrs since I knew my neighbor. we still just call each other neighbor. we hang out at least once a week.
Tim Allen is that you?
But sometimes you meet people who you never see again. That brain space could be used for Vim keybindings.
Hello Jarvis!
We don't need names, so long we vibe
Haha there's a guy I hang out with at the library and I think he's great.
Wanted to invite him to a party and realized I had no way to get in touch. No name or anything.
For like a month, I've been trying to visit the library at the same exact time to see if we bump into each other.
Library stranger, I hope we meet again.
If someone I just met uses my name regularly I feel like they're trying to sell me something.
If someone I talk to keeps using my name, I think they're following advice on how to remember names, and that they're bad at names
'The memory palace' is the superior memorization method
Jfc, if you knew how long it has taken me to know the names of some of my friends, and not just work friends or gym friends, it would be absurd.
Hell, even after months of hanging with someone, you might not know their last name; it's all "hey, I'm zipper". Why zipper? "I dunno, you know how it is". Yeah, I feel that. Anyway, went a beer, zip?
My chronic pain/disability support group shares space with an autism support group. Not a single one of the autism group knows my actual name afaik, but we'll hang out down the road at a diner some nights as a mixed group when we're meeting at the same time. It's all "hey, beard!" And "sasquatch, wanna see my cat?" And sometimes just "man". I've known some of them for years and we don't know each other's actual names. A couple of them, I've been to their house, and vice versa, and we don't know each others last name at all.
One guy in specific came over, heard my wife call out my name and was confused as hell because my name sounds like a regular word and thought it was a different nickname. Asked for the story behind it, and I had to show him my driver's license because he thought I was fucking with him. We'd had dinner together at the diner dozens of times.
No need for real names when you're bros
This guy's name is Fork
After fucking around for a while turned into being exclusive for about six months, the woman who is now my wife realized that we didn't know each other's last names. If she hadn't brought it up it's hard to tell how long I would have gone not knowing.
Knowing someones name is a bit too intimate for my taste.
The only reason you need to know someone's name is to talk about them behind their back.
Excellent point, if you're just 1 on 1 with someone you dont need their name except to talk about them with someone else.
I'm always terrible with names but they do come in handy
Hey,who's working ____'s shift Thursday?
Who do I need to talk to in HR?
who makes the schedule?
Ask ___ if they can cover your shift.
Email ____ for me and see if they have a copy of that report.
Can you tell ___ to come see me.
in other words, forced and unnatural and unnecessary behavior that is just a parasite eating your lifetime and energy
Reject society, embrace raiding Anglo-Saxons with the homies.
An energy vampire you say...
The obvious way out of this situation: open your own kebab place and start calling him bossman or chief.
I fucking detest when people call me bossman.
Here's a fun way to play it- say "We've talked so many times over the years, and I bet you don't even know my name."
If he does, explain that you said that because you don't know his, laugh about it. Get his name and put it in your phone if you think you'll forget.
If he doesn't, then say "Well we're in the same boat because I don't know yours!" Exchange names, and put it in your phone if you think you'll forget.
Here's a less convoluted way: "hey [mate, bro, ...] I never caught your name"
why say their name when you could instead say “guy” or “man”, or, occasionally, “buddy”?
Don't forget the universal "Dude" and "Bro"
Or if you're really close friends, the old "fuckface".
"I once worked with a guy for three years and never learned his name. Best friend I ever had. We still never talk sometimes..." - Ron Swanson
I have ADHD (+ other stuff) and so names has always been a massive issue for me. A few years ago I just stopped trying because I don't talk to most people anyways. out of the ~25 people in this class with me right now (fun fact! I am breaking a law by being on my phone rn :3) I know the name of,
1: teacher
2: girl with pink hair
3: trans friend
4: person who sits next to me and cannot understand what a function is to save his life
5: someone who I sat next to in 3rd grade
The others, no earthly idea. I have COWORKERS in this class who I don't know their name 😓
I spent more than 4 years working in a place were I just knew the names of the 10 people immediately around me. People kept talking about person X or Y from another floor or room and I had absolutely no fucking idea who they were talking about.
So I travel all over for work at different places. I'll start telling a story about something that happened three weeks ago to a coworker. "Oh yeah, where were you at?" Me- blank stare half the time.
Sometimes it comes to me after a few seconds, sometimes I can't even remember which state I was in.
I used to be awful with names but I got better at that. Still below average, but better. I do have ADHD for what that's worth.
2 things that make it a little bit easier to remember other people's names is repeating the name of the person after he/she just said it and trying to associate with another person you know that has the same name. It's not perfect but it's better than forgetting every single time.
Repeating the name back helped me immensely. I'm still not great with names but I'm so much better than I was.
Me_irl
You are literally burning money. Pay attention as instructors don't work for free
You do know that telling someone with ADHD to just pay attention is like telling someone on a cane to jog, right?
Dick move in other words
winter break starts tomorrow, I finished pretty much all my work last week. My school makes winter break start next week because of the way the semesters line up.
I was forced to spend 3 hours in the gym today watching a students vs teachers basketball game. The most work I've done in the last 3 days is roll a die and draw a snowman depending on those numbers then doing math to figure out the chances of the ordering of them in AP Comp-Sci Principles lol
I appreciate the message though. I try to understand all the information I can, even if I'm horrible at Spanish 2 and English 😭
on the bright side, this is the last time I get to say "see ya next year" (I'm a senior in HS)
Enjoy winter break. If you aren't going to college (and I wouldn't recommend it for most people), this will be the last time you have that much free time unless you live long enough, and make enough money, to retire. Well unless you have a wealthy and generous family. Congratulations if that's the case, you won the birth lottery!
Sorry to be such a downer. I forget there are high school kids on Lemmy. For what it's worth I'm sorry about climate change, but that's largely the fault of my elders and the corporations that control the government.
Register to vote!
You pay for the degree, not the classes.
They could be in 4th grade...
It’s cool. I don’t usually care about people‘s names that much, and I know he doesn’t care about my name, so why does it matter.
For the most part people can call me dude and bro until the end of time at work.
Or El Duderino, if they're not into the whole brevity thing.
“I’m the dude, man”
When I was around 20yo, I spent a summer with a new group of friends pretending I knew everyone's names. It was anxiety hell. Today, I realize that I can just admit that I forget names and ask and it's no problem. But that was an interesting summer.
When I first started work I was in shop where there were three Bills, two Phil's and two Neil's . I never ever worked out who was who.
Bro, homie, dawg, phil
It’s easy to go years without knowing names, better if you don’t use that last one
Phil and Phil (both whirling angrily to acknowledge you): "WHAT?!"
Seems a little early...
It's happened to me a few times over the years, but if anything it's an opportunity to think up a nickname. Sometimes they stick and all.
Something profound about only knowing someone by your shared experiences
Haha bro remember that time 10 years ago when we did that thing? Man that was nice.
Oh thank god its not just me.
I have a friend who is a legend. If I've been hanging out with someone he will ask their name and if I don't know then he will introduce himself to them ask their name then tell me. Saved me so many times.
This could be a great Seinfeld or Curb episode
Men really are like this lol
Grunt.
most names are made-up anyways, and i can't remember made-up stuff. there has to be something profound about it or i forget it
actually i have adopted a hobby of just giving people new names (yeah i know it could be seen as disrespectful but for me it's just a normal way of doing things) and then calling them by that name. yes, it has led to confusion in the past. but it just feels like the proper thing to do. (yes you can call me weird and no i won't take it as an insult.)
also, there's this weird phenomenon that when i make up a new name for somebody, somehow that's much easier to remember. and if i do forget and make up a new name again, that new name will often be the same as the first time. so there seems to be something "recognizable" or "fundamental" about it.
Once sat at the same table as another guy in high school every weekday for six months. We traded less than ten words in that time. Later we became great friends.
Wait until you need to reference your bro for someone else.
I talked to ??? about /something/...
Nah, just where you know them from is plenty.
Yeah. "My boy from the bar, the one with the anime girl car..." or whatever is how my stories to my wife would go. If told to a general audience the pii would be removed.
so relatable, i call everyone "dude" or "man".
i think names are an exception and only reserved for rare occurrences. honestly, i wouldn't mind if people didn't have names in general. just call everyone "child" "man" or "hey you" depending on their appearance. names are a weird concept to me. it's not natural that people have names, i guess.
Can't relate
This is the correct way to do friendships. Drag doesn't agree with the forced intimacy of learning someone's name the same day you meet them. Names should be shared the third time you meet someone. Of course sometimes it's necessary to learn names earlier or later, but the default should be third.
Drag has a lot of rules Drag made up about life and society. Drag could free Drag from all these binds by relaxing.
such a drag
Actually you're not supposed to capitalize every time you mention drag.
Tele can't imagine drag gets many opportunities to share names with people.