J.D. Vance says he gets bad press because most journalists are “childless adults”
https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2024/07/jd-vance-childless-adults-media/Open linkView original on lemmy.world580
Comments103https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2024/07/jd-vance-childless-adults-media/Open linkView original on lemmy.world
He's really just got that one "accomplishment" he's proud of, huh?
You guys! I did it! Like, with an actual woman! And, wait for it, no condom! You guys, I wennt in raw! And I totally came inside! Is your mind blown yet?
Sure thing, JD, whatever you say. What was her name? Lemme guess, Broyhill?
Ashley.
Finnala.
That's sofa king amazing.
If the world didn't have so many J.D. Vances in it, I would reconsider having children.
Wow, he really wants to go with the "childless" thing, huh? Should go over swimmingly with Millenials and Gen Z that can't afford to have children anymore.
He just wants Millennials to be the happy and proud parent Trump is of his children- Ivanka, Don Jr., Derek, Barron, and he doesn't have any other daughters.
He probably knows their names as well as you.
I’m not so sure of that. Unlike him, I know Tiffany Trump exists.
Yes but what about Eric?
You mean Derek? Donald’s third-favorite son he forgets about? Yes, Donald Trump is very aware of his third son who he knows is definitely named Derek.
While he's just an adultless child
He wants to ensure that all children have children. His type is couches, dolphins, and little girls.
That's unfair of you to say. The first one is confirmed to be a hoax.
No it's not. So far, no one has been able to disprove that Vance fucked a couch.
A technicality, it was actually a love seat.
But he admitted it. He even went on the "Sectional Healing" podcast. His favorite type of couch to fuck is a chaise btw
And that right there is some fascism talking points.
Most of us are childless adults because of republican policies.
They're so fucking stupid. If they wanted to keep making the ultra rich richer, they'd give all of us enough money to spend disposable income. But the current policies are coming to the inevitable late stage capitalism conclusion where none of us have enough money to continue propping them up.
It's been decades of short term gains over sustainability, and we're at the end of that pattern now
This isn’t even bronze age bruh some primitive societies had women who specialised into certain tasks not have children for various reasons. Or even for paganist (religious) reasons.
Hey! It's an iron age belief system
Print photos of different couches and mail them to any or all of these locations:
https://www.vance.senate.gov/office-locations/
Don’t forget to add little love notes. e.g., “Thinking of you 💋”
Okay I’m super out of the loop, where did the couchfucker thing come from?
There was a Twitter post claiming he wrote in his book that he fucked couch cushions as a younger lad. It is (as far as we know) not true, however it caught like wildfire and is now a certified dank meme
I've been saying this for a while now that this anger and resentment over childfree people has become increasingly pervasive and dangerous and it really feels like we are going to be one of the first against the wall.
Even among otherwise reasonable people I know there is a shocking amount of resentment towards people who choose to live their lives for something besides children.
It’s because so many of these people hate their children and resent those kids for being alive. I have heard other parents talk about how much they wasted on kids bringing them up, and how much better they imagine their lives had they not had kids.
They want other people saddled with this same burden and drag everyone down to their misery.
It’s natural as a parent to think about life without kids, especially with how miserable it has become. Kids are seldom allowed to be kids. It’s all structured nonsense and constant trash like 20 games of little kid sports, which they don’t want to play. They want to sit inside and play electronics just like adults.
Parents also spend hundreds of dollars on things like music lessons, and the kid gets bored because Minecraft genuinely is more fun for a kid. Then they get angry and hateful at the kid.
Well what good are you if you aren't making future soldiers? Get out there and sow your wild oats. Or spread your legs. Whatever you have to do, do it for America.
Harris out here telling us we shouldn't throw up our arms when we should be rolling up our sleeves. Vance just wants to roll up our slipcovers.
I haven't really seen that honestly, it's pretty much a non-event. I have a kid, some of my circle don't plan on it. No one really cares.
I've seen childfree people on the internet complaining about people with kids plenty enough, but I always assumed they were a vocal minority.
The only time I've ever seen this topic as an actual point of contention in real life is people who insist on no kids at weddings. Which I do think is kind of a dick move, but also people's preogerative.
I've seen kids at weddings. Hell, I've been a kid at weddings. It was generally a bad experience for everyone.
Bored. Hungry. Thirsty. Where's the toilet? I wanna play over there. Not allowed to touch this and that. Don't run around. Don't yell. Stop doing rude things. Don't cry. Barf. Sleepy. Who gave them alcohol? I wanna go home! Stop crying. Etc and so on.
Kids and weddings rarely mix well, often making it a burdensome experience for everyone, mostly for the kids.
This is also why I hate weddings as an adult. They're boring. Maybe I'd feel differently if it was my own wedding or if I was really emotionally invested in the couple or something.
Weddings are different if you're a close friend of the betrothed. Then it's a party with all your friends and a bunch of people you tangentially know.
Being a distant friend or cousin at those events sucks.
Or maybe the wedding they want to make wouldn't be appropriate for kids?
A lot of times this is it. Adults want to get shitfaced, play songs with cuss words, and have fun.
You can’t do that with your kids in tow and with other people’s kids around.
The wealthy want more people in the world so that they can pay employees less. More people, more competition for jobs. Also, more consumption, more sales.
Infinite growth requires an increase in one of two things - workers in the pool, or wages.
Corporate sees one option.
That is pretty funny, actually. It's such an old-timey insult. He is basically calling them spinsters. I can't imagine this will catch on.
Hell yeah JD!!! That's my boy! Keep giving us this motivational locker room talk, you're the gift that keeps on giving! Keep cooking (yourself) King. You're kinda mainlining the LGBTQ stuff to the point that it's stale, maybe alienate some minorities next go round, that'd be SICK
With all his focus of who does and doesn’t have kids, I feel like there’s a good “precious bodily fluids” joke to be made here.
🎶 every sperm is sacred, every sperm is good. Every sperm is needed, in your neighborhood. 🎶
I hear he left a lot of precious bodily fluids in his couch.
Unlike him and his wife, Couchela.
You know what else is childless? All the couches he's been humping. What a hypocrite. Sheesh.
I dunno, I've seen some chairs and loveseats that look too much like their couches to be a coincidence. We might need to get Maury involved here.
I'm a childless adult. I'm such a terrible person. I worship the devil and I kill people. What are you gonna do about it? My cats are literally tiny Satans.
Actually, they fucking rock. Best kitties in the world.
Fellow childless adult here. Partner and I want kids, but we can't bear to bring a person into this world where the climate is fucked, reaganomics has ruined the middle class, and restrictive reproductive healthcare laws make pregnancy a huge risk.
JD Vance wants to bitch about childless adults, but he and his ilk are causing us to abstain from having kids.
This couch fucker needs to resign.
It's insane to me that this is where the line is drawn. Found guilty of rape, no big deal. Calls people childless cat owners, people go crazy.
That same attitude got trump elected in 2016
It's really not the same attitude. JD Vance is a terrible pick, literally anyone else who would replace him would do better
It wasn't that she was unlikable. It was all the bot farms and nobody would have ever thought Dementia Don the racist rapist with 34 felonies could possibly win, so too many voters stayed home. That will not happen this time.
VOTE!!! Volunteer to give rides to those that couldn't vote without the help.
Vance can go fuck himself. And a couch. And a dolphin. And whatever else he gets off on. What a douchbag.
Why do Republicans hate children so much? I have kids and fail to understand why the party supporters want children born unwanted. Do they secretly relish the idea that these unwanted kids will grow up in misery? Neglected, abused, worse? WTAF?
Unironically, they absolutely do. Children are the punishment for having sex out of wedlock, and not only must the woman suffer for having this child, but the child must suffer because they're the product of sin.
I knew a number of people at my old church who ABSOLUTELY thought this way.
I had a conversation about abortion with a friend once where, after a lot of effort by my to keep the conversation on topic, she finally admitted that having a child if the punishment you deserve for getting pregnant.
In this case I think it’s not even anything to do with the contempt for children. It’s just yet another way to mark people you don’t like as outsiders and others. Republicans absolutely love to demonize the media any way they can.
Military recruiting is down and their pipelines are weak as our knowledge and information economy have proliferated and thrived. So: do whatever is needed to make childhood so shitty being raised from a negligent and abusive household, and flyover country future economic prospects so bleak as an adult that an Army 11X MOS looks like a golden ticket out.
The military doesn’t want well-adjusted, emotionally stable and regulated to enlist for combat arms. Their need for warfighters outweighs the ethics of manipulating a society’s citizens to worship war.
And there’s only so many officers (whom they actually do want to be emotionally stable, educated, and rational) that they need.
Children have needs. Republicans don't do well with people that have needs.
This guy is hilarious! He's gonna drop a solid gaffe bomb soon enough and Drumph won't know what to do.
I'm trying to imagine what would even register as a gaffe at this point, discernable from the cosmic background dumpster-fire of Trump's campaign
He may get dropped, I think.
We're in move, counter-move territory after Biden dropped out and everything coalesced behind Harris.
I don't know, if Trump drops him, that looks a lot worse for Trump than it did Biden dropping out for Harris. There haven't been months and months and months of people on both sides saying Biden is unfit for another term.
You may be right. Where I am is this:
If the race starts to separate, Trump is not loyal. He just requires it of others. And he's been rather successful with persuading others to view his treatment as unfair.
Edit: formatting
Also Appalachians are rising up to shit in his face
What a neckbeard
Living in sin.... No attachments, just these journalists and their sexy spouses - their Lazy Boys and their Ashleys.
“Why do these sexy couches keep seducing me??” - Jumbo Douche Vance
And since it's republicans, we haven't even acknowledged that these are all underaged couches, still well within their warranties with a lot of life and promise ahead of them... That is until old "Just Do (it with couches) Vance shows up...
Why on Earth does he think this is a good strategy?
Imma need a source on that one. But yeah, a shrinking tax base and aging population is bad mojo.
Every time a new story about Vance comes out, I become more and more certain that Trump regrets choosing him.
He's really proud that he found a woman who will let him raw dog
What’s the tactic here to win voters? Alienate them? Are the republicans trying to neg women into voting for them?
I don’t think lack of self esteem is going to win them any votes, how will Republicans raising taxes on the poor and giving corporations tax cuts help the childless cat ladies have babies?
No tactic, he's just an asshole. Just because Trump was stupid enough to pick him doesn't mean that Vance has a single clue about what he's fucking doing.
Oh, the poor little fascist doesn't like being shat on like he rightly deserves. ROFL, he should go back to couch-san for some more one on one time.
Large part of the electorate. Maybe that should matter to him.
Obsession with childless adults? Hmm, I think I know which major Republican donor recommended him to Trump...
This really smacks of "bloodlines."
All this thread gave me is the question:
What the fuck did I miss that JD Vance is now meme'd as a couch fucker?
An Internet User made up that he wrote in his book that he put a latex glove between couch cussions and fucked it. The Internet spread it fast.
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/jd-vance-couch-cushions/
And then this happened: https://knowyourmeme.com/news/ap-retracts-its-jd-vance-couch-cushion-story-fact-check-leading-some-to-jokingly-conclude-the-lewd-tale-must-be-true
And this:
https://knowyourmeme.com/news/as-internet-discovers-truth-about-the-jd-vance-couch-diddler-rumors-it-discovers-time-vance-appears-to-have-looked-up-dolphins-violating-women-on-twitter
Vance made a statement clearly saying he has never had sexual relations with a couch ‘to completion’.
This qualifier means, to me, that he did indeed do the thing.
I couldn't believe my ears when I heard it. That statement was so funny.
I had to read it like four times, I focus (a bit too much) on rhetoric when someone speaks because I’m used to qualifiers like this twisting what they say, so I’m going to just keep pointing it out.
I'mma need some sauce on that denial.
That's more than enough proof for me!
What is wrong with the MAGA goobers? Is this really the hill they want to die on?
They want Gileon
I interpret this as "he wants even more bad press, this time from pissed-off journalists".
Vance probably wanted a couch for a wife over a person, but had to settle /shitpost
Some folks may need to become a parent to develop this form of empathy, but it isn’t by any means required. A ton of the childfree folks I’ve met are extremely empathetic and forward about wanting to better things.
My reading comprehension must be pretty bad because for a second it sounded like Taylor Swift was Kamala Harris' step daughter.
So what? Does this dunce think that's an insult?
Shady Vans is weird man.
Even if that's true, being able to navigate the media environment is a job requirement for politicians.
He sucks so bad at this.
The only people against circular reasoning are those it doesn't work for.
nottheonion material
A clear copy of an article from The Onion right ? Right ?
Yeah, THAT'S THE REASON
Maybe tax the rich, so normal people can afford children.
If that's actually true, maybe don't attack the people who will be reporting on what you say?
I'm not an expert in PR training, but this seems like it would be pretty early in the lessons.