Iranian President Stoned To Death With Mountain
https://www.theonion.com/iranian-president-stoned-to-death-with-mountain-1851488487Open linkView original on reddthat.com1068
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https://www.theonion.com/iranian-president-stoned-to-death-with-mountain-1851488487Open linkView original on reddthat.com
I wish I had the patience to go and post this in reply to every tankie I've seen today defending the "honour" of this piece of shit in the name of Iranians who they've convinced themselves they can speak for (yet somehow never speak up for their best interests, only in defence of their "great leaders" interests, curious.. 🤔🙄).
Yeah, western tankies especially can be very weird. Meanwhile, the actual communist party of Iran has nothing good to say about him.
Quote:
Right, and they call anyone who disagrees with them, even actual communists, "McCarthyists" 🤦♀️🤦♀️
Seriously though, anyone who sees any reason whatsoever for communists to support the Iranian government mustn't have a single fucking clue what communism is about.. They're a fucking joke (if only they didn't go around giving leftists such a bad name)..
That's a fantastic, and not at all surprising piece of information though, thanks for sharing!
Damn, based.
It should be noted that the Tudeh party has it's HQ in Europe, hence them being all Bertie Big Bollocks about this news. They are banned in Iran.
The communists also helped overthrow the CIA puppet regime in the first place, which seems to have helped them not one jot.
What's a tankie? I keep seeing that term on Lemmy and nowhere else. I feel like I should know it by now.
Tankies are people who claim to be communists, but who exclusively support authoritarians and their oppressive regimes, past and present, because these authoritarians call themselves communists (think believing Nazis were socialists because it was in their party name), even though their actions have nothing at all to do with communism, and fascists co-opting leftist language to gain power being a well documented phenomenon.
It's pretty easy to tell really: if a project is/was stateless, classless, and moneyless - congratulations, it's almost certainly communism, and those who support it are communists (or possibly one of several varieties of anarchist, like myself).
However if one or any of those conditions aren't met, and/or there is a single dictator or a small group of cronies holding on to power claiming they've been met, but the reality is clearly different - congratulations, you basically have run of the mill fascism on your hands and those who support it are tankies (who, as I pointed out in OP, almost always speak up and in defence of a "dear leader" but never in defence of the people themselves, because all they care about is the regime, not the people living under it).
In the case of the fediverse, there are a couple of dedicated instances almost exclusively occupied by tankies, who have made it their goal to essentially troll and brigade anyone who doesn't agree with their, frankly bizarre, views (calling it "dialectics" to make themselves feel better). They're generally easy to avoid though, by blocking individuals, or their entire instance.
Thanks for the in-depth explanation.
No problem, glad I could help.
Just to add, pelespirit is more or less right about the origin of the word, you can read more on the wiki
So would someone who thinks North Korea is a democracy because it's in the name, "Democratic People's Republic of North Korea" be a Tankie?
To my understanding this means historically a western communist who supported the USSR's interventions (with tanks, hence the name) in Eastern European countries (Hungary, Czechoslovakia, maybe also East Germany) when the Warsaw Pact was a thing. More broadly someone who thinks the Soviet Union was a good regime.
I’m so glad I don’t really see them much anymore
Alright, that one was pretty clever lmao
Let he who is without sin throw the first helicopter.
I remember the Taliban bitching that all the materiel (helicopters, humvees, etc) the US left behind at the airport had had grenades detonated in their engine compartments
It's really more of a buffer overflow situation at this point.
Fucking legendary.
I've found a lot of Onion headlines pretty mid and uninspired recently, but this one is aces. No notes.
They've been going pretty hard lately, it's great
The new ownership group is Global Tetrahedron. According to their website, they were "born of the shadows, and are committed to control in all its forms." They've also donated "300,000 guns to underprivileged communities".
My understanding is that the name itself is from older onion articles where when they needed an evil corporation name that is what they used. So they are indeed super fans.
Link about the buyout
Threw the whole fucking planet at him, he musta done something to deserve it! :P
Karma is a bitch.
Karma is fiction
I saw the crash site in an aerial photograph and it looks like a big scorch mark. As if the devil reached a burning hand up out of the ground to personally invite them all down to their final destination.
Really, no links?
His devil is everyone elses god.
Some background/ other info
https://www.npr.org/2024/05/20/1252418856/iran-interim-president-mohammad-mokhber
🧐
Will the zealots and their goons consider this a message from Allah, that their ways might be wrong?
Nah!
When Muhammad didn't go to the mountain...
F
[X]
What next? Someone getting stoned to death by pluto???
Someone getting stoned to death by grass?
Karma comes in many disguises
I told you she was funny.
More like not soon enough. Good riddance.
I'm out of the loop. What did he do to be a shitty person?
Sold shitloads of suicide drones to Russia and went on an absolute crusade against women's rights.
Okay YUP. . Fuck that guy glad he's dead.
Is he the reason for the Taliban takeover??
In Afghanistan? No. Iran is neighbors with Afghanistan but the Taliban’s base of control is along the Afghan border with Pakistan.
Suicide drones? Weird name.
It's to do with how the drones operate: A big expensive drone might be fitted with say, a gun or a rocket? The idea being that you fly it out, shoot someone, bring it back and fly it out again.
A suicide drone is much, MUCH cheaper, and consists of a normal drone with a bomb strapped to it. It doesn't come back, it destroys itself in order to give you one cheap drone attack (which is good in areas where your drones are likely to be shot down regardless of if they're a suicide model or not, for example trying to drone strike a densely populated and heavily defended city).
So it's like a guided missile. Thanks. Damn, that shit is terrifying.
Yah, dollar store guided missile. Sure it's not as guided, but when you can easily afford to just throw 40 of them out right into anti-air defences because if even one slips through it will be monetarily worth it...
The things are a fucking menace.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/1988_executions_of_Iranian_political_prisoners
Why, are you mourning his death?
No such thing as too soon.
Comedy is all about timing.
If they posted this in a month's time when no one cares it wouldn't be funny.
If they posted this Friday before it happened that would just be prescient
No, comedy is all about timing.
And repetition.
And rules of threes
And subverting expectations.
And repetition.
Explaining comedy is like dissecting a frog.
You learn more about it, but it dies in the process...
If it starts the process alive it's vivisection!
ehhhhhh......no. it's not.
Why? You're still grieving?
Real bad taste
He was an evil bastard who was second in command of a regime full of human rights abuse that meddles in and disrupts the entire region on a scale that previously required associating with a British monarch. To the point that there is a lot of footage of the people of Iran cheering in the streets.
Fuck 'em.
Thank you for that bespoke political/historical burn, that just made my day
Imagine being this deep into propaganda
God forbid a woman shows their hair, am I right?
Alright, I'll bite.
How are people misinterpreting the Khamenei regime's human rights issues (particularly against women)? And by "people" I, of course, mean orgs like Amnesty International.
Here is some "propaganda" for you to refute https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_rights_in_Iran
Wanna ask Mahsa Amini about that? Oh, you can't because she got killed for not covering her hair?
Brutal, isn't it?
he says while looking into a mirror
Decided to glance into your comment history and phew, you are one angry little individual.
BUT maybe you have your reasons, many of us do. However, it's important to be angry for the right reasons, at the right people.
Awww, are you sad the butcher of tehran finally met his end? Have you ever talked to any Iranian about the IRR?
Theocratic fascist go splat
Of course it's .ml
Every. Fucking. Time.
"How dare you talk bad about the Butcher of Tehran!"
poor taste like 'killing off your political opposition' poor taste or like 'plaid with stripes' poor taste?
Jokes are jokes.
That's exactly what the bears at the area he crashed said.
Nope. It was funny!
Lighten up. It was a joke.
That's nothing a bit of pepper can't fix.