Spyke
kbin.social

If he didn't like it, he wouldn't have invented getting railed in a sundress.

111
Bonsoirreply
lemmy.ca

« I form the light and create darkness, I bring prosperity and create disaster; I rail and get railed in a sundress; I, the LORD, do all these things. »

  • Isaiah 45:7, probably
42

Welcome back to heaven, Jesus!

Man, that was fun. Next time I'm going as a girl in a sundress!

14
lemmy.world

Isn't one of their big rules "Be fruitful and multiply"?

I take that to mean getting railed in sundresses is perfectly christian.

81

'Go forth and receive eternal life.'

But John came fifth and won a toaster.

6
Frozengyroreply
lemmy.world

And by be fruitful and multiply he clearly meant, only having sex with the lights out, under the covers, in the missionary position, for the sole purpose of procreation.

19
hemkoreply
lemmy.dbzer0.com

Also female orgasm is a sin, she's basically whore then and probably would also enjoy it with others

9
jballsreply
sh.itjust.works

Who was that Republican dude whose wife said something like women don't orgasm and a women getting wet is a medical issue? That poor girl.

14
medgremlinreply
midwest.social

That was Ben Shapiro's wife who, I believe, is a physician. She's got some interesting cognitive dissonance going on.

12

I personally know a gynecologist who, in her thirties, was still uneducated on the wonders of receiving oral sex, on the existence of the G spot, etc. Apparently they don't really have time for that sort of stuff in the cursus in a lot of countries. Sexual health doesn't include pleasure, it seems.
Which is to say, unless it comes from personal experience, they won't be advocating for that sort of stuff.
So it makes perfect sense if that lady is a strict Christian who married her "first love" and isn't really a medical gynecologist and he's the typical "i need a wife who's a virgin so I'll never gave to make an effort because she'll never know any better" dude. That poor woman should shut the fuck up though.

4
andrewtareply
lemmy.world

Only if it involves getting nailed while on a cross

Yeah I'm going to hell.

15
Mac
mander.xyz

i dated a sundress girl once. goooood times.

61
Senselessreply
feddit.de

The question everyone needs an answer to right now is: did you rail her in the sundress?

28
lemmy.world

I can practically hear the rattle of pearls being clutched and gasps of indignation. How much you want to bet Bonnie was getting hers when she was young but that was "just in fun" or "she didn't know better but does now"?

60
kromemreply
lemmy.world

Bonnie sure as shit isn't wearing pearls to clutch. Maybe clutching her Hallmark locket with a picture of her favorite Hummel figurine inside it.

2
lemm.ee

Step 1) Procure and wear sundress
Step 2) Flirt provocatively
Step 3) ???
Step 4) Profit!

13
lemmy.world

I guess Bonnie made it to age 60 being a virgin and pleasing God somehow, and wishes that desolate solitary misery on everybody else

12
Aganimreply
lemmy.world

being a virgin and pleasing God somehow

Well, there's a reason they say that the most powerful position is on your knees..

2

You reached the end