“Florida man high on bath salts caught eating Jared Kushner’s face.”

I’ve got a bunch more if anyone from The Onion is reading…

Like others have said, it gets better with time. I did a lot of cycling before my daughter was born. She’s 2 now and I’m finally getting back into evening rides after she’s in bed. Good lights are key!

Another option is to involve your kid somehow. When my daughter was a little younger, I would load her up in a kid carrier backpack and take her for long walks. A professor of mine in college trained to climb Mount Everest in part by using a treadmill on maximum incline with his kid in a backpack.

Which specific nsfw communities? So I can, you know, avoid them.

Yo dawg…