I was in a punk band when I was younger. We were mid set in a shitty bar. My amp started to spaz out. Like cutting in and out every few min. This old dude jumped on stage and kicked it really hard. Patted me on the back, handed me a shot, and jumped down (all mid song). Never had a problem with that amp again. Used it for years after. Old punk rocker magic. Nothing to laugh at.r

Shit. That's a big oops. Been a very long day.

How much are the tickets to your show?

Holding out for the Anne Frank Trapper Keeper phone.

Been fighting a dying pancreas since 2016. Dropped from 212 to 120lbs. My body doesn't Absorb the food I injest. Pancreas dumps awful amounts of acid into my stomach. I throw up almost daily sometimes up to a dozen times. I take very expensive pig enzymes to compensate for my body not absorbing food. It's an absolute mess. I feel your pain. At 40 I'm feeling pretty bleak. Hang in there. Pancreatitis is a terrible thing. Especially chronic

Years ago I was working in a sales / support call center. One day in between calls someone posed the question of if you had to sleep with someone of the same sex who would it be. Obvuois answers were things like George Clooney Brad Pitt etc. one of our team was extremely introverted so it was normal for him not to participate.

3 weeks later he pipes up, "I've given this a lot of thought and If I had to sleep with a man it would be Jesus Christ" 3 weeks later. Blows my mind he was in deep contemplation for so long. I still am taken a bit back.

The reason? "Jesus seems like he'd be a considerate lover with strong hands." Beautiful.

Ex gf... Is that ewe?

Good luck I'm behind 7 proxies

As a diabetic I grapple with this often. Turns out can and should are very different things :( curse you pancreas. You too mom. Kids don't do drugs with a baby in the womb. Your kids will suffer.

This is the way

Real world Weasleys live here. Ron works at the local Home Depot. Got a steal on them windows.

I'm 40. Minecraft is so good. I play harbored games mostly like Elite Dangerous and a ton of RTS or FPS games. Minecraft is different but it's magic.

Amen. So happy to be done with Reddit.

This is a wild ride. I've seen this like 4 times today... Why can't I stop reading the entire thing. I just walk away hella confused. I'm a simple man with simple dreams. And now I need therapy. Just kidding I definitely needed therapy well before this.

We don't speak of the war.

I drew Pickles on my phone to forever remember her. She is still my world.

And she became president of the world.

I was a manager. It made me a bastard. I went back to coding.

How much did it cost to download all that RAM?

I wish I was this dedicated to... Anything