Spyke

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Browser Fingerprints Lead to Price Discrimination

This has been going on for years, including inside the EU, for those wondering. You can test to see if it happens for you by going to a flight website, getting a price for a flight, then go back a few times to search for the same flight.

The question of what you do to fight it is by clearing the cookie for the website, using a different browser and/or changing your location/block tracking (use a VPN or tor). Usually clearing the cookie is enough.

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If You Love Ted Lasso ... Don't Miss These Other Great Depictions of Positive Masculinity - The Peabody Awards

Shrinking might be a good positive depiction of positive masculinity (I don't think it is, he's a toxic asshole who puts his stuff on everyone else) but I couldn't get over the fact that he's supposed to be a therapist. I'm a psychotherapist and Segal's wildly unethical behaviour, never mind the unethical behaviour of his workmates (who should have reported him) made me really dislike this show. I loved Ted Lasso and Shrinking is not on the same level.

autism

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Heightened pain when struggling emotionally?

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This is the answer. I started writing something then realised I'd just rewritten what you had written in different words. Autistic people tend to be less able to recognise what their body is telling them. I recently said to my partner that I have been exhausted and really tired and she responded that I'd had a busy week, done 9 hours of driving in heavy traffic and terrible weather and had poor sleep. I thought there was something really wrong with me, she pointed out perfectly valid reasons for me feeling the way I was.

It's called "interoception" for anyone that wants a new special interest (or to add to theirs): https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/professional-practice/interoception-wellbeing

autism

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I had my assessment yesterday and I'm upset about all the things I forgot to say. Did this happen to you?

Did you complete any forms before the assessment? I had to complete a few forms before assessment which asked me questions based on the diagnostic criteria which then went towards the psychiatrist's final evaluation. Assessment styles seem to vary wildly between services and counties, though.

To answer your question more directly, though, yes, I thought of loads of things I forgot to mention in assessment afterwards. But then I was given my diagnosis at the end of the assessment so it sounds like your psychiatrist deals with things differently, at least in that example.

If I can give you some advice, I'd suggest you put it out of your mind for now until you get the result and if you do not agree with the result, appeal with the extra information (if you can). It would be a good idea to start a log of supporting information when you remember it, as well. Keep it somewhere handy, like a small notebook you keep on your pocket or a notes app on your phone. I think that's good advice for everyone going into an assessment.

tech

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I Would Rather See My Books Get Pirated Than This (Or: Why Goodreads and Amazon Are Becoming Dumpster Fires) | Jane Friedman

This is a valid point but Amazon also sells a lot of books based on pseudo-science and debunked claims. It's pretty clear they are not an ethical company so they absolutely will do nothing to stop AI generated books.

For anyone that thinks AI books are not a problem, I recommend this article and the Behind the Bastards two-parter that goes along with it: https://shatterzone.substack.com/p/ai-is-coming-for-your-children

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*Permanently Deleted*

They identify as a man because gender is defined externally to the individual. They were born, the doctor saw a penis, said, "it's a boy" and those around them reinforced male norms onto them: parents tend to cuddle boys less than girls; enforce stoic principles (men don't cry); encourage rougher, more violent play; and encourage more independence. There's plenty of references for these points so I didn't feel the need to provide any.

Most people don't challenge their identity if they don't need to and changing parts of your identity can be traumatic (ask queer person what coming out was like for them). The crisis of masculinity, as with any cultural crisis, is just a conservative, reaction to something that challenges them.

Gender is cultural and temporal so changes all the time; high heeled shoes used to be worn by rich Persian men, pink was the color that boys wore because pink was thought to be a watered down red, the color of the British army that they would, of course, eventually join. The Male Breadwinner model is an interesting way to frame the idea that the man is provider for the family. Prior to the Industrial Revolution the whole family provided.

autism

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How to avoid/handle meltdowns in public

Our stories sound similar. Calm, relatively stable upbringing and then mostly self isolation leads to symptoms being unrecognised until children and other stresses build up and the symptoms are no longer under control.

The best suggestion I can give you is learn to accept your limitations (I'd say that to anyone, really). Managing two children is stressful for most people, for you even more so. That's a fact and it's OK. You get overwhelmed when there's too much going on. That's a fact and it's OK. Sometimes we aren't going to be able to cope in life. That's a fact and it's OK. So in this situation, you now know that you will find it too difficult to manage your kids where you are without support from your wife. That's a fact and it's OK.

Maybe you could arrange to take them somewhere else that has less sensory stimulation next time, or you agree with your wife that she has time to do things like shopping when you are at home with the kids. It's difficult to give suggestions without knowing where you were, but hopefully you get the idea.

Depending on how old your children are, speaking to them to ensure they know not to run away without you (and reinforcing the boundary when they do run away from you) can also help. (Most) Children like having responsibilities.

Mostly forgive yourself for not being able to cope in that situation. Modern life doesn't allow any parent to be perfect, but we can aim to be good enough and that's even more the case for neurodivergent parents. Give your kids a hug and tell them you love them then accept their love when they give it back. I definitely struggle with that but recognise how important it is.

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Meat and masculinity have been bound together for centuries – and that’s no accident

Citations Needed podcast had an episode about the link between the colonial settler myth and eating meat (episode 139) which was really good. (Summarising very badly) Eating meat became proof of the settler dominion over the land, animals and peoples (Native Americans) of the West and was pushed to maintain the narrative.

Edit: I also recommend a recent episode of Maintenance Phase where they debunk the paleo diet and have past episodes on Peterson.

autism

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*Permanently Deleted*

I only go to places that are usually busy at quiet times, though I know for some people that's not possible. Otherwise I plan out a route to get through the store as quickly as possible (having something to focus on helps me) and wear noise cancelling headphones and listen to something I like, usually a podcast. If it is very busy and I can't take it anymore I go to the quietest part of the store for a minute.