Me with my hand in the cookie jar, staring at my mom, who just caught me red-handed: "It was a test! I was just checking whether you would catch me, wow, you did it Mom, congrats!

It's not the future humanity needs right now, but it's the one it deserves. 🦇

Me: Haha, 20 year old games, huh? Like Super Mario Bros. and Megaman, right?

Them: Zelda Twilight Princess came out in 2006.

Me: (Benjamin Button gif)

Massie dismissed the warnings as alarmist. (“We’re not anarchists,” he said.) Government needs to shrink, he argued, and he assumes the Legislature will find alternatives. A fairer system, he argued, would make people pay for the government services they use, but not those they don’t.

Ugh, I just cannot understand how people think this way. How on earth can you expect government services to be there when you need them if they're not funded when you don't need them? It's almost a corollary to the terrible "don't tax millionaires because one day I might be a millionaire" argument.

Just started a rewatch last night! Two episodes in, so I just saw this guy. Damn, it's so good, I forgot how silly things are!

I mean, fuck Boeing and the death still seems suspicious. But to claim that there was no police investigation is just lying. Suspect a cover-up or frame or whatever if you want, but seems like there was a pretty thorough investigation: https://www.wdbj7.com/2024/05/18/police-release-investigation-report-boeing-whistleblower-death/

What is the charge? Eating a succulent meal?

Just because I can’t name the head of Antifa (or any other prominent member of Antifa) off the top of my head doesn’t mean they aren’t a highly coordinated terrorist organization.

Fantastic satire

Newton's blessings on everyone!

I upvoted because I could not disagree more.

But! No judgement from me. Everything's not for everyone. I can reread the LOTR trilogy for the 12th time or delve into the Silmarillion (basically the history of the LOTR world) and love every second. Whereas I tried to make it through the first Twilight book after watching the movie and had to put it down and take a shower. But if you like Twilight more, read that, because that's what you like! Your thoughts still have value!

Headline could be misleading, but it basically means that (according to one independent analysis) China's emissions have just stopped growing this year. They are still the world's largest contributor by far. This hilariously optimistic chart from the same site shows them relative to the US and almost all of Europe:

Still, not gonna knock what is good news, or at least "better than the alternative" news

Ridiculous. The metric system is all the same. How many millimommies in a decamommy? I dunno, but it's 10 or 100 or 1000 or something like that. Everything is a factor of ten, and the unit conversions are even a factor of 10! You can look that up in a table, and a 6-year-old can properly measure things. Booooring!

Now look at the Imperial/English/Standard/US/Florida system: how many hogshead in a cubic furlong? Nobody knows offhand, so you have to get creative. Is it a US standard colonial, also called a tobacco hogshead? Or is it the British hogshead? It may depend on the contents, like whether it's brandy or sugar or fish (the species matters!). You can convert to firkins if you wish, but that's optional. As for furlongs, it used to depend on the horse, but sadly they standardized it to 40 rods, because German feet were longer than English feet, probably due to the toes. Fortunately, some states in the US still disagree on definitions, so the length may depend on the state. Once you figure that out, you can easily calculate that using a English wine hogshead and an international furlong leads to about 34,136,818.7 hogshead in a cubic furlong. Explain to me how that's not better than your silly metric system!

Prison pocket of holding

If there was a god, I'd imagine them designing the universe and giggling like an idiot when they made math.

Engineering: We only care if it works, even if it breaks math/physics/chemistry/biology.

"Lawrence, what would you do if you had a million dollars?"

"I'll tell you what I'd do, man. Two trees at the same time, man!"

I had a copy of Fahrenheit 451 as a kid that suddenly had a different book in it for about ten pages or so. I'm like 5 chapters in, and all of the characters change. Same font, same size text, so I was very confused when the next page was talking about some woman cuddling on a couch with a man, and him feeling her shoulders. I figured it out finally by the page numbers being off.

It was part of a romance novel, which probably wasn't explicit, but seemed spicy to a 10-year-old. I'd think it was a fever dream if my mom didn't bring it up every so often ("I wrote to the publisher and gave them an earful!"). Anyway, the publisher apologized and sent us a new copy plus some coupons. I wish we'd kept the book, though.

Mr. and Mrs. McGill,

Thank you for your time. While the vicious poisoning of your son was a horrific tragedy, I am sure that with the evidence we discussed, justice will be served and the perpetrators will be made to financially compensate your shattered family. If you need to contact me or any of the other lawyers at our firm regarding this important matter, you can reach me at [email protected].