brains on autopilot
I relate to this one, like half of the posts or comments I make are edited because i just always find a way to forget something or make a spelling error lol
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36 replies
You can tell it's real by the different font sizes
Or it could be stitched together
The iMessage app would still have the same font size throughout scrolling.
Crop two pics into not the same size then resize the lower one so it fits the same width. Idk, seems plausible.
super cool post
Super cool comment lowleveldata
Super cool comment zloubida
I fumbled a threesome like this. I was balls to the wall fucked up on a green dragon tincture, three droppers full. I got a pic from two acquaintances kissing and was like "damn, seems like you both are having fun". Wasn't until later that that someone told me what they were trying to do. Even later on I found out I may or may not be autistic.
I dunno man, I've watched too many movies where a couple of hotties seduce a dude and then it turns into horror. Don't rule out that the acquaintances were just messing with you.
In this situation nah because a woman I started dating briefly around that time told me
::: spoiler Tap for spoiler She had a threesome with one of the two women in the photo and another guy. Basically, this chick had a kink for dominating other women, watching and encouraging while they got fucked etc. :::
Remember, leave your money and cards at home. Just in case.
It’s okay man maybe they were trying to entrap you in a rape case
Wtf lol
Hey you never know you may have dodged a bullet. You won’t ever catch me getting entrapped im too smart for the female population
when you say "im too smart for the female population", you're basically just saying that you're never getting laid, right?
Pretty sure that's what they meant and also that it was a joke
Does that mean I might still have chance with the female population?
Fellas help me out with that Lemmyrizz, what is the appropriate response if a girl sends you this
"I showed this to my mother and she says that you need to eat more. Something about child bearing hips. My dad wants to know who fitted your mirror?
Btw, nice tits"
100%
"Better switch to a messaging app with end-to-end encryption if you want to share pictures like this https://signal.org/install"
Absurd could be taken the wrong way though
"The back of your head is ridiculous!"
Let your eyeballs pop out of your head, your tongue unfurl onto the floor, your heart beat through your chest and spring back inside, all while either howling, whistling, or going with the classic "YEAH, BABY!"
This has worked for me literally every single time.
I usually drop to my hands and knees, panting with my tongue out and banging a fist on the floor.
You say 'hubba hubba'.
Tasteful bulge pic. No shirt, boxer briefs with an obvious half chub.
Unless they have a great sense of humor, then it's the opposite. Donald Ducking with a throbbing erection and a thumbs up.
I also like to do dick cleavage. Pull boxers down so the base of the shaft is showing.
Are you referencing the Donald Duck dick pic from John Oliver's Last Week Tonight that gets brought up with every duck story (last time with the Reflecting Pool)?
::: spoiler Cartoon NSFW
:::
Yes, drakes do have corkscrew penises
Surely that isn't anatomically accurate, is it?
Also, do ducks even have balls?
No, it isn't. Ducks usually have smaller eyeballs and no clothes. Their testicles are internal and the featherless penis is pink, thinner and more twisted (but can be as long as the rest of the body).
Pro-tip for the final stages: most phones can do slow-mo for any grand moments you'd like to capture.
I don't normally share my secret recipes.
Bridget?
Bridget?
Yes, the pic is after some reflection but that's not a big issue, it can be flipped digitally
This feels like the start to the movie Obsession.
What's the problem?