Damn, I poop 2-5 times a DAY. If I go a day without pooping I’m in for a very uncomfortable time. There was only one time years ago where i got constipated as hell and didn’t go for 2 whole nightmarish weeks!
This video is sponsored by Poop4me.com do you find yourself tired out by all the pooping you have to do? Are you tired of spending hours alone in the bathroom and on the John? Visit Poop4me.com to end bathroom loneliness once and for all - our platform will help connect you with poop surrogates near you who can alleviate your digestive needs and take the load off your personal colon. Use code ‘bumhole’ for 25% off your first purchase today
I have a friend who asked the same question because he knew there wouldn't be a bidet where he was going. That's the only reason I can think of that's not related to some sort of sex thing.
My insides literally shut down when I'm out in public. I don't need to poop no matter what I'm up to. The moment I get back home or to the hotel, I will wreck that bathroom, but it's like I literally cannot go in a public restroom
['Distracted Boyfriend' - A stock photo image of a man walking side by side with a woman in a blue shirt, holding hands, as a different woman in a red shirt walks past. The man appears to be whistling at the woman walking past, showing clear interest in her looks, while the woman he is walking with looks at him with an expression of shock and disgust. The text placed over the woman walking past, the man, and the woman next to the man, respectively, reads as follows.]
3 DAY NO POOP CHALLENGE
FEDIVERSE
BILLIONAIRES IN SUBMARINE
^I'm a human volunteer transcribing posts in a format compatible with screen readers, for blind and visually impaired users!^
This is the founding myth we need!
I'm so happy to be alive when this happened
I was there 3000 years ago when the no-poop challenge happened.
...and it was a heartwarming moment.
So was it you that shat this? https://lemmy.ca/post/871718
What do you think happens at the end of the three day no poop challenge? Some things need to be preserved, for the better of humanity.
[email protected] We beseech thee
I was there when the lemmy no poop meme spawned.
The kind of deep lore that will be spoken of in 1h YouTube essays in 10 years - unless YouTube became peertube by then or something.
just use your calendar or something
In theory, if the submarine didn’t implode, the billionaires would have the same challenge.
I think the conspiracy theories around it are super fascinating.
That was the point of the original shitpost
Dam that shit flew over my head
It's our first (that I'm aware of) fediverse meta! Awww, look at how we've grown.
Wha- what? Lemmy, is... Evolving?
Your Lemmy has evolved into LOMMY.
Ba. Na. Na. Banananananana. Bam.
Do do do do dododo - dododo - dododo
You mean LOOMMY, right?
I was going to post a comment similar to this. We've made history here!
HI YOUTUBE!
Okay but for real I used to only poop like twice a week this doesn't feel like a challenge to me
There was a whole series of mystery stories featuring a detective who never pooped. He was called No Shit Sherlock.
Are you fully pooped out yet?
It from childhood until about 22, so I can't really point to something in particular
Jesus Crispy Creamy Christ, I shit 3 times a day. 3 meals, 3 shits. Where's all your food going people?!
How small are your shits (or how big are your meals)?
I wonder the same thing! If I only went once or twice a week I feel like I'd need industrial plumbing.
Inside muscle I guess.
Jokes aside, it can depend on the physiology and lifestyle of the person as well.
At times I only shit like once a week 💀
Are you guys OK? I go more than 1-2 days and I feel like death.
Dude, I drink coffee and raisin Bran for breakfast. I have never gone a single day with constipation. I can't imagine pooping only once a week.
Death how, is it the ripped anus due to birthing a massive log or something else?
1-3 times every 1-3 days is the normal range.
you need more fibre
Damn, I poop 2-5 times a DAY. If I go a day without pooping I’m in for a very uncomfortable time. There was only one time years ago where i got constipated as hell and didn’t go for 2 whole nightmarish weeks!
Seriously. Who knew irritable bowel syndrome was a superpower?
I had surgery fairly recently and didn't need to poop for about 5 of the 7 days they kept me in the hospital.
not sure if it was the food or just not doing anything but laying on a hospital bed for a week but it can be done.
Ok level with me what if we all pooped in a submarine?
I'm not a submarinologist or anything, but,I mean, it'd depends on what we ate. If we stick to high fat high fiber foods... I bet we could float it.
Would lentils and beans protect it from imploding?
"Someone let me out of this submarine Perogi took a shit on the floor and it stinks!"
Our first obscure piece of Lemmy lore. May there be many more into our future.
the lemmy lore does need to be genuine and not forced
the best things come naturally and the worst things come from being forced
Just like poop
I know this post
It will go down as a classic
This is a pretty good 3-days-without-a-shitpost, but not using the skeleton-in-a-pool was a missed opportunity. I fixed it for you:
... YOU CAN IMAGE INSIDE A COMMENT!? Why did I have to learn this on a poop meme!?
So we've moved from implosions to explosions.
Can you do all your poops for the week in one go on Monday morning? Asking for a friend
"Don't ask why I need this" lol
That was honestly the part that made the post an instant classic.
No, but if you have the cash you could always just hire a surogate.
This video is sponsored by Poop4me.com do you find yourself tired out by all the pooping you have to do? Are you tired of spending hours alone in the bathroom and on the John? Visit Poop4me.com to end bathroom loneliness once and for all - our platform will help connect you with poop surrogates near you who can alleviate your digestive needs and take the load off your personal colon. Use code ‘bumhole’ for 25% off your first purchase today
Employers love this trick
I mean, if you're going to be stuck in a submarine while oxygen is running out, it would be great if you could avoid pooping.
Luckily they didn't have to go through that ordeal.
Death before submarine poop.
@hemko Wait, people have to *plan* to do this? I should see my doctor.
The one true shitpost.
I know such a man personally. He didn't poop for two months straight, and then he had five feet of intestine cut out.
Did they let him take it home as a souvenir?
Alright, can I get some context here? I've been pretty busy today...
https://lemmy.ml/post/1450855
What in the Kentucky fried fuck?
Also, thanks!
Apparently I missed this lol. Can anyone point to the origin thread?
This is the link for me: original asklemmy thread
enjoy :)
This is pure gold, lmao
Context required
its about this post
Huh, even with context, I guess.
Terrible case of not liking new bathrooms? I hate public restrooms too but, my brother in christ take some deep breaths you'll get through.
Or maybe a sex journey, thanks /kbin 🤣
Smart money is on a woman backpacking.
@flicker @hemko @CosmicK9 @spyr0w @Thepinyaroma I am genuinely impressed with the very specific, researchable, experienced advice in the comments.
That was my first though, you can pee with a she wee but pooping on the trail in a mixed group is a pain.
I have a friend who asked the same question because he knew there wouldn't be a bidet where he was going. That's the only reason I can think of that's not related to some sort of sex thing.
My insides literally shut down when I'm out in public. I don't need to poop no matter what I'm up to. The moment I get back home or to the hotel, I will wreck that bathroom, but it's like I literally cannot go in a public restroom
My god... I'm a furry, and even this is too much for me.
Are we trying to poop more or poop less?
Yes.
Does anyone still remember the "No Shitting September" challenge?
god damnit. What did you guys do
I thought they died right away because that thing gave in
Genious 🤣🤣🤣
Image Transcription: Meme
['Distracted Boyfriend' - A stock photo image of a man walking side by side with a woman in a blue shirt, holding hands, as a different woman in a red shirt walks past. The man appears to be whistling at the woman walking past, showing clear interest in her looks, while the woman he is walking with looks at him with an expression of shock and disgust. The text placed over the woman walking past, the man, and the woman next to the man, respectively, reads as follows.]
3 DAY NO POOP CHALLENGE
FEDIVERSE
BILLIONAIRES IN SUBMARINE
^I'm a human volunteer transcribing posts in a format compatible with screen readers, for blind and visually impaired users!^
Good human <3
No Poop Challen seems very unhealthy lol.
Feel like home
Just noticed, after so many years - is it the same girl??!
out of the loop. the same girl as… what?!
I think you might be face blind, dude! they look really distinct to me.
In the meme image at the top.
I’m almost certain no. I have had that thought before!