Spyke
lemmy.ml

Chaotic Bastard is exactly right. Everyone thinks its geese or swans, and although they are truly bastards, roosters are raving rage filled lunatics.

80
lemmy.world

Ducks have a marginally better attitude and personality, and their eggs are much better, IMHO

12

I disagree, but my dad always raves about how great ducks are. Resilient, resistant to disease, eat everything including garden pests...

13

I like how many kinds of leftovers can be given to chickens. The only limitation is that they have to get curious enough to peck at it. They'll ignore some delicious shit on their regular food plate if it's the "wrong" shape and color.

5

We had only hens, and the older one who was easing off laying started getting roosterish, the first time she charged me with wings spread and pecked my foot for picking up one of the other birds I was very confused.

8

I'm on around #30 in my life, both ends of the spectrum across that time. Currently have 3, they are all hybrids with silkies and are all doscile. Last batch were barred rock absolute assholes that would go out of their way for a confrontation.

7

We had a funny one. He was a bastard as well, but he was not too bad and could be hand fed without attacking. He and the geese had a truce though.

1
lemmy.world

Got attacked by herding dogs a couple weeks ago. I can confirm they're not as smart as they seem. They left their herd and ran a solid 100m to the road I was walking to stand in front of me and bark. Spoiler alert: I am not a wolf

52

Obviously not. You're clearly a skinny bear with extreme hair loss.

11
scbastevereply
lemmy.world

He was after the two wolves inside you

*Somebody already made that joke, I'm killing myself

27
lemmy.world

Don't kill yourself. Kill one of the wolves inside you. Then you still have one wolf

18
rmukreply
feddit.uk

Once you're down to a single wolf inside you, you'll find it easier to cross the river inside you with the cabbage and goat that are also inside you.

4

It's nothing but an existential hatred of existence. Damn things are suicidal. There was always a few that managed to kill themselves every year on the ranch.

4
boonhetreply
sopuli.xyz

While in English usually sheep or sheeple is meant as an insult saying you don't think on your own and just follow programming, in Estonian it's just a playful way to call someone a dumbass. It's something you might say to your significant other or good friend after they make a stupid ass-joke (reverse ass-hyphen xkcd time)

So may we all be sheep on this glorious day

19
lemmy.dbzer0.com

This is waay too fucking perfect.

I've not owned a farm, but I grew around county fairs and often visited and helped out at horse stables or local / friend's farms or ranches or what not.

The only change I could possibly suggest is that somehow a horse needs to be 'big chaotic stupid', but i know that breaks the system, but goddamnit horses are fucking stupid.

38

They also walk around on their middle fingers so they're literally flipping the world off with all 4 limbs from the day they were born.

8
lemmy.world

Fair but they must be big. I don't have horses and haven't spent too much time with them. Never really liked them tbh.

15

Shetties fall into the pure evil category. It's not on the chart because the little shits are extra sneaky about it.

4

There was too much stupid going around so they got pushed onto the other category.

10
hansoloreply
lemmy.today

My family has a few... They're good at some things, but can be dumb as a box of hair at other things. They're the perfect entry for lawful stupid.

Also, that's a dog breed. Dogs don't have races, other than greyhounds at the track.

16

I have a couple of those. They are smart but do some truly dumbass things sometimes.

10

I think they care a lot about the lawful axis and not at all about the stupid axis.

6
lemmy.dbzer0.com

Seems about right, though I'd note that if you have geese, the rooster doesn't even begin to compare for chaotic bastard.

12
lemmy.today

Geese can't cause you bodily harm. Roosters will straight up kill you.

10
lemmy.ca

"What I remember is the goose giving me the evil eye and then the goose wrapping its wings around my head, and I can't see and I hear myself screaming," she said.

Surman spent five days in hospital after suffering a concussion, fractured cheekbone, face lacerations including a scar under her eyebrow and loose teeth.

She credits wearing a bike helmet and sunglasses with preventing more serious injuries.

https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/ottawa/goose-attack-leaves-ottawa-cyclist-shaken-and-scarred-1.2686751

6
The_vreply
lemmy.world

My ass and legs disagree after a gander latched on to my ass and beat me with his wings when I was a kid on the ranch.

Next time he came at me, I had a baseball bat. Roasted gander for dinner.

2

I'm sure you were fine. Kids have a tendency to overreact. I also was "viciously attacked" by a goose as a child.

1
lemmy.today

Haven't spent much time with cattle huh. Idk if any animal fits the lawful big square.

6

I would say rhinos rather than elephants, put elephants in neutral (although a bull in musth just wants to kill everything) and hippos in chaotic.

4

There's a place for an Africa version of this.

Chaotic big would be hippos. Lawful big eles. Neutral big giraffes. All 3 will straight up murder you, but only the hippo will do it for fun.

2
lemmy.world

I have sheep, goats, pigs,ducks, chickens, a couple llamas, dogs, cats and a couple Hereford cows. The cows have been very easy going/playful in the time I've had them.

8
boonhetreply
sopuli.xyz

Knew a guy who had a bunch of limousines, but it was a bull herd. He said the bigger ones would damn near rape the smaller ones to death. Or maybe they actually accomplished it, it's been a while and I don't remember.

I'm hoping cows are friendlier than bulls though

1
boonhetreply
sopuli.xyz

Yeah turns out they get really aggressive apparently. And animals can have gay buttsecks too. Sometimes it's... Less than consensual.

1
lemmy.ca

A human family .... in this case the farmers family ... would also fit in all those categories

-4