Install a bidet. They're 20 bucks, it's a spray nozzle on a hose, they're awesome. Saw them on holiday in Cambodia everywhere, installed one when I got home, have zero regrets.
Sure, BUT, don't just connect it to the cold water supply - they need proper isolation - I've heard of cases where households have gotten really sick and they found that bacteria from the bum gun had made it back to the drinking water.
What? How would that even work? The nozzle gets dirty and the bacteria propagate three feet up the tube against occasional water flow and into the main pipe?
I'd imagine something like a guest bathroom that is rarely used so the bacteria have time to multiply and diffuse up the water pipe. Or develop a biofilm on the pipe walls that isn't removed by running water (to see this effect leave a dish of water out for a few days so it feels slimy then try to rinse it with water)
I don't think this is likely at all, but I could understand how it could come about in some niche situations.
You're not supposed to use them as a douche. You should spray it against your anus, not insert it.
Honestly, I don't know how that would work. When I spray, the nozzle doesn't get wet from ricochet. My hand, button and nozzle stay dry except for the tiny holes where the water comes out.
Douching master race. Moved and my bidet no longer has the necessary pressure for douching and I'm back to being the guy from OP's meme. Don't know about inserting anything anywhere tho, the right amount of water pressure, maybe with the right angles, and you're good to go.
Even then, I see no way for water to go back up the bidet line and contaminate stuff elsewhere. Its like expecting faucets to contaminate things upstream when you wash your hands, it kinda makes no sense, at least to me.
Bidet is cool, but how do you dry your ass? Also, what to do when you miss and a stream of water takes shit away off your asshole to other places like clothes and other parts of your body
Okay we have a bidet at home but even when I use it I still need to wipe after. Is it supposed to pressure wash your ass or what exactly am I supposeed to do when using it.
You maybe have a shitty bidet, or its settings need to be adjusted .
Also there's a bit of technique - you gotta move around a bit; work the spray around to get everything.
Well you could add a T fitting on your Water source and weld a large venturi effectue Hopper to it, filled with the abrasive. However i think your best course of action is not to see if you can do it but ask yourself if you should.
Get yourself a proper heated bidet and you’ll never go back. I bought a Toto it warms the seat, automatically shoots soothing warm water at your angry brown eye and then blow dry’s your bum.
Recently went to Japan for work and my hotel had one of these so I got to try it out.
It's my belief that you haven't experienced the best life has to offer until you've had your butthole powerwashed. It was a trancsendental experience for me.
Lack of fiber in your diet. Take a spoon full of psyllium husk in some water before bed. You will also decrease your risk of colon cancer. A bidet is wonderful but does not address the root of the issue.
70 replies
Install a bidet. They're 20 bucks, it's a spray nozzle on a hose, they're awesome. Saw them on holiday in Cambodia everywhere, installed one when I got home, have zero regrets.
Sure, BUT, don't just connect it to the cold water supply - they need proper isolation - I've heard of cases where households have gotten really sick and they found that bacteria from the bum gun had made it back to the drinking water.
What? How would that even work? The nozzle gets dirty and the bacteria propagate three feet up the tube against occasional water flow and into the main pipe?
I'd imagine something like a guest bathroom that is rarely used so the bacteria have time to multiply and diffuse up the water pipe. Or develop a biofilm on the pipe walls that isn't removed by running water (to see this effect leave a dish of water out for a few days so it feels slimy then try to rinse it with water)
I don't think this is likely at all, but I could understand how it could come about in some niche situations.
You can have pressure loss in the while system and it can suck water up it and contaminate a lot of fresh water.
Backflow preventers are a thing. I’d never considered it for a bidet but it makes sense.
You're not supposed to use them as a douche. You should spray it against your anus, not insert it.
Honestly, I don't know how that would work. When I spray, the nozzle doesn't get wet from ricochet. My hand, button and nozzle stay dry except for the tiny holes where the water comes out.
Douching master race. Moved and my bidet no longer has the necessary pressure for douching and I'm back to being the guy from OP's meme. Don't know about inserting anything anywhere tho, the right amount of water pressure, maybe with the right angles, and you're good to go.
Even then, I see no way for water to go back up the bidet line and contaminate stuff elsewhere. Its like expecting faucets to contaminate things upstream when you wash your hands, it kinda makes no sense, at least to me.
How? Like, proper sanitation ought to take care of that.
So many people from the third world do that here. Our right illegal for being unsanitary but they don't care.
It's tough kid, but it's life? Don't forget to pack a wife?
Downvoters don't get the reference
I get called unc on the regular for exactly this kinda shit I swear😭
Bidet is cool, but how do you dry your ass? Also, what to do when you miss and a stream of water takes shit away off your asshole to other places like clothes and other parts of your body
2 sheets of toilet paper.
It's hard to miss
It doesn't, it's still in the bowl.
It's easier than it might seem.
Too little.
Yes, but it happens
It does
I've been using this for a while, but then I realized that it wasn't convenient for me and I stopped pooping altogether
Not for me. But feel free to use more. I have 6 layered toiletpapier.
Never happened to me.
Are you Kim Yong Un? Because he works so hard, he burns everything so he never has to poop either.
We have a bidet and I still just reach over and soak TP a few times instead, just feels more thorough.
Wiping more just turns the paper red instead of brown
Stop wiping and use a portable bidet. You'll never go back to wiping.
Seen a guy in work filling up his arse bottle in the sink all the time. Was fucking disgusting.
well you can hardly expect them to fill it up with gross toilet water, can you?
Okay we have a bidet at home but even when I use it I still need to wipe after. Is it supposed to pressure wash your ass or what exactly am I supposeed to do when using it.
Yes. I only use toilet paper afterwards to dry everything.
I tried that but it just does not clean that well it seems. The toilet paper gets dirty
You maybe have a shitty bidet, or its settings need to be adjusted .
Also there's a bit of technique - you gotta move around a bit; work the spray around to get everything.
It's a standalone one
Use your hands and wash with soap. Then use toilet paper to pat dry afterwards. That’s what I do and you can’t get any cleaner than that.
I only do that in severe cases
Try Adding a light abrasive to the Water. You can find bulk sillica at your local bodyshop.
How would that work? I cannot just open it up and put it inside the plumbing
Well you could add a T fitting on your Water source and weld a large venturi effectue Hopper to it, filled with the abrasive. However i think your best course of action is not to see if you can do it but ask yourself if you should.
Wet blasting : https://m.youtube.com/shorts/0y-aE5QoF9E
I already know the answer to be I should not
You're just not supposed to doomscroll on the toilet until everything is dried and has to be scraped off.
I don't usually spend more than 5 minjtes shitting so.....
Yes. It shouldn't take that much pressure.
But it does not clean that well.
Maybe you have low water pressure? It should feel like a tiny hose.
Yeah, low water pressure would be my guess.
Water can cut through steel plate at high enough pressure. It can certainly remove poop from a butt with enough pressure.
Get yourself a proper heated bidet and you’ll never go back. I bought a Toto it warms the seat, automatically shoots soothing warm water at your angry brown eye and then blow dry’s your bum.
Best purchase ever!
Recently went to Japan for work and my hotel had one of these so I got to try it out.
It's my belief that you haven't experienced the best life has to offer until you've had your butthole powerwashed. It was a trancsendental experience for me.
Seconded.
Once you splash yo crack, you’ll never go back.
Hell a cold water bidet will change your life too
Eat more fibre
And thinking about the amount of paper used, praying that is not going to be clogged
Flush every few wipes to reduce the chance.
Sometimes I'm on my phone while wiping a streaky one and lose track of the amount of paper used.
Flush early, flush often.
Dude... Just get a bidet.
Clearly you need poop knife, you gotta shove it in there like how you clean up a empty peanut butter jar.
That’s no way to use a poop knife...
Bidets are cool but y'all need to eat more fiber.
laughs in bidet
Starts to feel like bidet is the linux of butt Cleaning which one is the Arch of bidets?
No idea, I'm a Slackware user XD
Is that the dude that played professor X in the newer X-men movies?
The mivie is called Filth iirc
It's a fun movie
Yep
Yes!
Back in Covid when everyone was filling their house with toilet paper, I bought up a bidet for every Bathroom in the house. It’s the doomsday bidet
Lack of fiber in your diet. Take a spoon full of psyllium husk in some water before bed. You will also decrease your risk of colon cancer. A bidet is wonderful but does not address the root of the issue.
This is the most right answer. I dont have to wipe mor that 2 times most because of the fiber.
And often those times are just to make sure there is nothing
Real shit posting
https://m.youtube.com/shorts/Q2Ko78NEI9A
constipation perhaps.
You get what you deserve