Dev creates astrology-powered CPU scheduler for Linux, makes decisions based on planetary positions and zodiac signs — sched_ext framework informed by lunar phases, cosmic weather reports, and dynamic
‘Why let mere mortals decide CPU priorities when the cosmos can guide us?’ asks the developer.
To be clear, the point of this is to demonstrate the power and flexibility of a new Linux feature in a "haha only serious" way.
Zampieri is clear that this GPL-2.0 licensed project is a “scientifically dubious, cosmically hilarious” work. It definitely isn’t recommended for use in production systems - not because of bugs, but because it works as intended… The dev is still looking to add “more cosmic chaos” to scx_horoscope, so contributors are welcome.
https://www.tomshardware.com/software/linux/dev-creates-astrology-powered-cpu-scheduler-for-linux-makes-decisions-based-on-planetary-positions-and-zodiac-signs-sched-ext-framework-informed-by-lunar-phases-cosmic-weather-reports-and-dynamic-time-slicingOpen linkView original on thebrainbin.org
28 replies
Finally, my handbrake renders will complete when the stars literally align
Great, now my PC can be temperamental because mercury is in retrograde.
This is exactly why I switched to LibraOffice.
We shouldn't stop with the kernel but also apply this to our workflows.
PM sends you an invitation to a meeting? Venus says no.
I want cosmic chaos in my work day.
Chaos nothing. Can you imagine a week with zero meetings because your seventh house of Saturn or whatever says it's a bad week for collaboration? Amd this isn't random movements. You can plan around this for years.
If anything this might actually be a way to introduce seemingly random prohibitions or days in which you only do certain things. Honestly, that doesn't sound terrible.
I mean that’s kind of the point of astrology, energy ebbs and flows in different houses or areas of life. You just become aware of the energy so you can maximize it rather than fall into the shadow versions of it. Morally it’s not good or bad energy, it’s just energy.
This gives me a sort of Temple OS vibe. I have a feeling this developer will soon develop his own operating system based on Zodiac signs.
I’m into it honestly 🥲
This is how hippie chicks start using linux
And I'm all for it
I am also in favour of hippie chicks using Linux.
And also hippie dudes, to be clear. And hippie whatever the non binary version of dudes is.
I believe the term is “enbies.”
Too late
This is art
The feature list is where the most fun is had
https://github.com/zampierilucas/scx_horoscope?tab=readme-ov-file#features
Don't skip their ASTROLOGY.md if you want to minmax your playthrough.
https://github.com/zampierilucas/scx_horoscope/blob/master/ASTROLOGY.md
Sadly I have too much processors to run it.
Boss: "Have you finished that new feature yet? The deadline's coming up and the client is getting concerned" Lowly Mortal Programmer: "Sry, you're gonna have to tell the client that Mercury is in retrograde at least until this time next Earth-year"
Boss:Ugh, fine, are we talking tropical, sidereal, or anomalistic years?
Silly mortal, Mercury is retrograde four weeks at a time 3-4 times a year
Oh dear god.
So they've functionally formalized a specific variant of astrology.
... At least it would be consistent in how it is ridiculous, unlike 99.99% of current day astrologers.
Github notes tingle the strategy games side of my brain.
Shit like this is how we accidentally end up making 'magic' real, 100 or 1000 years in the future when are back to only 5% of the population being any kind of literate, and 'everything is computer', or at least computer relics.
OP, you should cross post this to /c/programmer_[email protected], because this is hilarious
So more stable than windows 11? What happens to the cpu when the moon is full and you click on the start menu?
I'm a Capricorn so... You know.
🙇♀️🙇♀️🙇♀️Zampieri. I haven't had the free time and finances to do this. Now can shorten my banterposting.
Man, better hope that realtime linux developers don't have a prankster nature.
@inclementimmigrant I've never met one who doesn't.