White House says it has tech that can "manipulate time and space"
A comment by White House science adviser Michael Kratsios has gone viral after a speech in which he claimed U.S. technology can “manipulate time and space,” prompting online speculation.
Kratsios, director of the White House Office of Science and Technology Policy, made the remark during a policy address at the Endless Frontiers Retreat in Austin, Texas on April 14.
“Our technologies permit us to manipulate time and space. They leave distance annihilated, cause things to grow, and improve productivity,” Kratsios said during prepared remarks published on the official White House website.
While the statement was likely intended as aspirational language about technological progress, it has since circulated widely online, with some interpreting the comment literally.
https://www.newsweek.com/white-house-says-tech-can-manipulate-time-space-2060986Open linkView original on lemmy.world
Perfect. No notes.
dammit
Well they're right: it really feels like 1934 Germany right now.
It's been 88 days since the inauguration....oh shit.
Hitler's birthday is in two days. Let's see if Trump randomly declares war on Poland or something to commemorate it.
It's the day that the clown traitors he appointed to destroy our intelligence agencies are supposed to hand him a report on if they can fake a reason for the filth to enact martial law.
Well there you go, that's definitely in his idol's spirit
Yep. Calling it now: insurrection act will be invoked on Sunday.
Canada/Mexico are already shivering.
Fucking hell it's not even been 3 months!?
The scenes I've seen of people around Trump, making sure to kiss his ass and over-emphasize with nervous straight faces what a genius he is and how well things are going, are the stuff of nightmares.
The time distortion first came when a huge number of dense people gathered at the same spot in the white house.
I - too - can walk, garden, and drink coffee.
"Can we get some comments from the innovators?"
"No we fired them."
He's Talking about regulations on Big Tech in terms of data collection, monopoly and social engineering. We need to remove these people from the sphere of political influence. Break up Alphabet, Delete Meta, tax wealth not work.
Nothing will meaningfully improve until the rich fear for their lives
p
I, too, am a source of gravity.
Sure, sure… Even a plane can “manipulate time and space”.
It manipulates space by “moving everything around you until the space around you is not the USA, but El Salvador,” and it manipulates time by making it seem like no time has passed as the space moves, almost like you were put to sleep with a tranquilizer (but that’s definitely not what it was)
It manipulates time by sending the entire country back 100 years, and it manipulates space by making it seem like the middle of Europe
To be fair, these last 3 months have felt like 3 years so maybe they're on to something.
Ok, so your on drugs. It's not a particularly unique technology tho.
if true this explains soooo much.
I can too.
I can move through space all the way to next to my nightstand and change the clock's time with a little wheel behind it.
Yea, its called creative accounting ... or fraud.
Too bad they have it set to 1930's germany
I'm just gonna quote my wife here when I talk about outlandish work stuff:
"Wow." - dream_weasel’s wife
Growing up in USSR we had a saying: a comrad comes to you with a shovel, points to a patch of land and says: "you will dig from here and until supper".
I bet White House, with it's ties to Putin's Russia, means something similar.
"Prompting online speculation" ... This line can be thrown into literally any news article.
white house discovers cannabis
Idiots just threw a wristwatch.
It's ketamine, isn't it?
If they had the technology to manipulate time and space they'd just use it to commit election fraud
It is called the MAGAt field of stupidity.
did someone just explain to this guy the half a century old tech scanning tunneling microscope that uses quantum tunneling for imaging
The cake is a lie! They shouted, certain they had grabbed the cultural zeitgeist by the tail
Oh god, the space age larpers took over
The pseudoscience and grift administration has embraced the Montauk Project
Amphetamines are a helluva drug
I never considered the world where we invent the ability to accelerate time, and just use it for making workers work more shifts so they die even younger just to extract more value relative to those without the technology.
[off topic]
https://ca01001934.schoolwires.net/cms/lib/CA01001934/Centricity/Domain/3762/SLOW-TUESDAY-NIGHT.pdf
You will enjoy this story.
Then go get everyone’s 401k money back
Reminds me of this key and peele skit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGFLPbpdMS8
There is ZERO reason to believe this.
Or at the least there is ZERO reason to believe it in the way that it was interpreted.
He who controls the past, controls the present.
Reminds me of the poster for the Terry Gilliam classic "Time Bandits."
They could travel anywhere in time or space. They just couldn't tie their own shoes."
The Time Machine we have at home https://youtu.be/L3LHAlcrTRA
I was expecting something along these lines
Please be Aliens bro. Please.
Come with us now on a journey through time and space. To the world of the Might Bullshit.
Go where no sane person has been before.
Manipulating time and space, hrm. I'm going to guess they bought themselves a snowglobe.
They can't even manipulate their own fool heads.
Crap, they found the Democrat's weather controlling space lasers.
Edit: sarcasm, since it doesn't seem to be that clear.