Spyke

Looking at a picture elsewhere in the thread, you might be right, he's the front half of a centaur.

5
lemmy.ml

And it is indeed a good shape for things like cookies.

2
lemm.ee

He's such a compulsive criminal that he even defies the laws of physics.

45
lemm.ee

People have made many jokes about his posture, but holy fuck... why does his body lean like that?

2

He's wearing lifts in his shoes to appear a few inches taller, that's apparently why he leans so hard. Because he's a fatass on high heels.

1

Funny, I thought he was being held in place by dark magic.

Although, it could well be a girdle infused with dark magic...

2
mander.xyz

Honestly, of all the things he's doing, not releasing the results of his physical are the least worrisome. Anyone with eyes and a brain can see he's not healthy.

56

We have one, it's called Donald Trump. Every time he lies, his penis shrinks.

2

At least it's better than his last term, where his personal doctor said he was the healthiest person ever (using language that clearly came from Trump himself) and the medical records were confiscated by his bodyguard.

Kind of like how he sued his old college to prevent them from sharing his grades - those are definitely the actions of someone who has nothing to hide.

5

Well he's alive enough to continue actively fucking up our country, so that right there deserves a national day of mourning.

35
D_C
lemm.ee

There's a dead badger up the road that's in better shape than this idiotic ArseNugget.

22

Yeah, not super healthy to harbor these kind of hopes. Good people leave too soon, and the people you dislike, seem to linger in for too long, defying your death wishes.

4
lemmy.world

Hopefully Trump ends his time with months of nonstop flatulence and explosive diarrhea

22

that's been an ongoing thing so the end will probably be a continuation of the same

7

Nah, it's the "A1, See?" test. It helps prove that his eyes and tastebuds are functioning as normal above expectations.

2

Supposedly it's not manly to be able to lift your short fingers above the height of where your heart is supposed to be. Also, it's emasculating to be seen with your wife these days, apparently.

19

She's busy complying as little as possible with their prenup conditions

4

results of his physical aren't immediately released

they have to be shredded and replaced with fiction.

15

it usually means, he has high cholesterol, high triglycerides, blood pressure, high blood sugar or close to it.

15

He's the healthiest man in the world, just like when this came up six years ago or whenever that was.

11

I love on they demanded Obama's birth certificate, but he refused to show his financial documents (even though every president has done so) and is keeping a fuckload of very important information that the people needs to know secret.

10
adarzareply
lemmy.ca

the president and their family are actually responsible for their own grocery bill.. and that would include 'take out'.

3

we should get him an all-you-can-eat-lifetime-subscription to McDonalds Hamberders.

Pretty sure if he eats himself into the grave, we can't be called assassins.

3
kbin.melroy.org

The Simpsons have failed us. The prediction of the 12th of April has not come to pass.

5

Is it normal for presidential medical records to be released to the public? I've never heard of this before

4

It was done as a matter of course by essentially every president before Trump. I think the tradition stretches back to Truman, after FDR died in office.

Biden, Obama, W, Clinton, and HW all did so. Not sure about Regan, whose Alzheimer's was hidden at the end.

22

Yes it was pretty standard before trump. Also releasing your tax records. Orange man is an exception to reasonable norms

10

it's like he doesn't know what the words "good" or "shape" mean.

4

They need a comission of medical geniuses to rewrite the report in a way that sounds remotely healthy.

3

They're probably cooking the book, and would release something that may make medical professionals think Trump is either a zombie or a sheep based on what they doctor.

1

Like what else would they say? Nope he has cancer and Alzheimer's. Won't last the term. Even if it were true, their not going to say it.

1