Spyke
lemmy.world

With his fragile ego, I’d spend the entire time asking if he could smell that awful smell. I’d ask him to check the bottoms of his shoes, drawing more and more attention and increasing his discomfort, all the while pretending that I’ve never heard of Elon Musk.

148
Kitreply
lemmy.blahaj.zone

Putting this tactic in my back pocket for uncomfortable social interactions.

36
lemmy.world

The only way to survive uncomfortable social interactions is to become one with them.

18

The only way to survive uncomfortable social interactions is to become one of them.

10

"That's okay, I forget to brush my teeth some mornings as well."

5

I'd like to think that I'd find a quick easy way to Luigi him but I know I'd just stare and look around for his security and be questioning my life choices that I was in the same room.

80
lemm.ee

Why the fuck are you spending so much money getting to a dead planet when you could be spending money to save a living one?

61
zephorahreply
lemm.ee

There’s no magnetic field. What’s his long term plan there?

My guess is it’s a billionaire “I wanna” thing and it goes no further than that.

19

He is not even expending on Mars. He is just saying he is expending on Mars in order to get funding a be more rich.

2
lemmy.world

Leave Mars alone. It is deeply immoral to send people there now. People have no business going there until we have thoroughly explored it and ruled out the possibility of indigenous microbial life. By studying such life, we may prove a second Genesis or prove the theory of panspermia. Either would have profound implications for our knowledge of the abundance of life in the universe. If we contaminate Mars, which sending humans would inevitably do, we may have to go all the way to another star system before we get another chance at answering these questions.

Let the billionaire space cadets stick to the asteroids and the Moon. Leave Mars the Hell alone. If after a few centuries of exploration we've thoroughly ruled out the presence of indigenous life, only then can we consider putting actual human beings on the surface.

17
lemmy.dbzer0.com

It's much easier and more effective to do science with people and labs in-situ than with slow, complex robots. The first people to land on mars will be scientists. We won't be in a position to mess up the martian environment for generations. Stop spreading fear and propaganda. If finding life is what you're after, Europa, Enceladus, Titan and Ganymede are much safer bets than Mars. Those worlds are completely inhospitable to humans, so there's little to no chance that we mess them up. I'd much rather we start colonizing the moon, due to the relative ease of access, but due to its low gravity (and razor-sharp regolth particles) it isn't a great place for humans.

I'd argue it's actually immoral not to colonize mars. There will be no future humanity if we blow ourselves up here without a sustainable city elsewhere in the solar system.

-7
EABOD25reply
lemm.ee

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. We have a viable planet that can sustain life right now. And if we take care of it, it can sustain life for a much longer time.

Also Mars is inhospitable to humans as well

16
lemmy.dbzer0.com

Agreed. But unless we spread out, we could be dooming ourselves. Imagine hundreds of thousands of years ago. If early humans had stayed in a single valley, never venturing further, simply because that place had everything we needed, a single natural catastrophe could've wiped us out. The same logic applies here.

We have the resources, capabilities and collective willpower to spread ourselves among the stars. We've never had that kind of power, we should take it while we still have the chance. We can do two things at once.

-5
EABOD25reply
lemm.ee

Simple solution; reduce childbirth. Let the people who don't want to have kids not have kids and the ones that want kids have them. However, that would involve giving proper reproductive health rights. Childbirth is already in decline, which is why many world leaders are panicking, but just because a politician is panicking doesn't mean it's wrong, but I digress...

For some reason, we as humans believe that the only solution for overpopulation is to cut losses and run when we have enough knowledge on what to do to reduce the degradation of the planet. But to too many people, the solution is to go start overpopulatinh other planets. It's just rinse and repeat. If we can't even get our shit together here, then what cosmic right do we have to go do it to another planet?

6

Reduce childbirth all you want (and I support it, we've massively overexpanded our population, far beyond what Earth can support sustainably) but that won't help if we get annihilated by an asteroid, supervolcano or nuclear war.

2
lemmy.dbzer0.com

Because we're the most complex beings capable of the greatest changes to the environment anywhere in the universe, as far as we know. That's worth keeping around, IMO.

-4
Naichreply
lemmings.world

We are also fucking up the planet we live on like a cancer. The planet would be better without us, and there is no reason to think we wouldn't fuck up any other planet we went to. Just because we have abnormally large brains doesn't make us anything special.

9

I agree with everything you said up until your last point. The fact that we can fuck up the planet this bad is a testament to our ability to build, solve problems and work together. That isn't just a byproduct of large brain size (dolphins and whales have larger brains) but also our status as social animals, invention of language and writing.

Wouldn't the earth and all its creatures be better served if we put heavy industry into space? Better yet, most of humanity? I'd love nothing more than for us to scour the asteroid belt and build a ringworld. But before we do that, we need an outpost on Mars.

-4
lemmy.world

You cannot sterilize a human laboratory. Even our gut bacteria represent an unavoidable risk. Much better to build robots that we can stick entirely in an autoclave and sterilize, from surface to core, before sending to the Mars surface.

And there is a severe contamination risk. We know of bacteria that exist deep with the crust of Earth that, if you were to transport them to far beneath the Martian surface, would be able to live just fine. We know of extremophile bacteria that live in rocks on the surface of the most arid deserts of Earth that could likely survive just fine in a similar Martian environment.

You need to be thinking on the scale of millennia here. I think Mars should be explored by humans in Mars orbit, tele-operating humanoid robots on the Martian surface. Think Avatar except regular robots. Look at the state of how humanoid robots are developing right now, with remote presence via haptic suits or similar. Think of where that technology will be in a hundred or two hundred years. It's very plausible that we will be able to operate such a machine in a way that feels indistinguishable from actually being there. And humans in Mars orbit would be able to operate them in real time.

I'm sorry, but your vanity is not worth the sacrifice of a world. Your pride is not worth us giving up what may be our one chance at finding a second Genesis in this star system. Realistically, it will take literally thousands of years of development of a human colony on Mars before it could credibly serve as a true backup to Earth, able to actually survive the destruction of Earth. Realistically, if you want a backup of Earth, you're much better doing it in some mile-deep bunker on Earth, in a deep ocean settlement, or on the surface of the Moon. It will take a thousand years of development to turn Mars into a true backup of Earth. And I'm not even talking terraforming here, just the time to build up the population and truly independent supply chains. Waiting a few centuries to make sure we're not ruining our one shot at this is not worth your pride. Yes, that means we in our time lose the glory of landing the first human on Mars. But that is a sacrifice we make for our children and our children's children. We do not have a right to take that risk, just for our own vainglorious pride.

And yes, there may be other chances of life around Sol, but we have no idea of the habitability of those ice shell moons. We don't know if life can even get going in such an environment, as we don't really know how life got started on Earth. We do however know that life got started here, and we do know that early conditions on Mars were much more similar to the conditions on Earth's surface than some ocean world buried under miles of ice. Mars is the only other terrestrial world in this star system that could plausibly have extant life near its surface. We should not sacrifice what may be our only chance to find it, for the sake of our vanity.

Leave. Mars. Alone.

3
DogWaterreply
lemmy.world

Damn people have no room for nuance here. The Elon hate is eclipsing rational discussion here and your getting mad down votes. Sucks.

Mostly, I agree with you.

But, I do have a really really big fear that once Elon gets space x in a position to be NASAs only outsourced transportation contractor, they will have a monopoly on hardware and NASA will have a budget that got reduced to pennies of what it is now.....

He's gonna extort them to let him do whatever he wants or he'll take his toys and go home. The first people on Mars will be scientists, but musks bullshit will be right behind them and he won't have to listen to a fucking thing they tell him.

I hope that doesn't happen but realistically there's nothing we will be able to do to stop it if he wants to.

IMHO it's his end goal. His reason for being trumps piggy bank right now. He's positioning himself to be untouchable as a space transportation company in 15 to 25 years. Spacex will be the most valuable company ever if it happens. Asteroid mining is going to be a multi trillion dollar industry and he wants to be the company that develops the infrastructure and can get out there and actually become capable of actually doing it. But this last bit is just a hunch

2
lemmy.dbzer0.com

I think you're right. Bit if we want a spacefaring civilization, this is the path to get there. I really wish someone else was leading the charge, but this is the world we live in.

Sometimes it feels really lonely here on Lemmy, when it comes to space exploration. People are really negative about it, as if doing that takes away resources from making the world a better place. But it doesn't! It's a technological innovation program; the insights gained here can help improve life on Earth. And if we can move industry to space, Earth will be thankful.

2
irmozreply
lemmy.world

Musk is not the path to space. I can't believe anyone would have such a limited imagination. I would hope we could do better than some childish capitalist.

1
lemmy.ca

I would ask him who he is. Then when he gets upset that I don't recognize him and he gives me his name I say "hmmm, never heard of you."

Watch is ego implode.

56
gimsyreply
feddit.it

"You look like a guy I saw in an episode of Rick and Morty" Smile "Elon Tusk?" "No Mr Poopy Butthole"

7

"Musk? Like the supermarket grade perfume? Did you know musk comes from glandular secretions? The word comes from 'testicle' because the gland looks like a scrotum." Give a couple of sniffs... "Oh wow, that's amazing!"

2
lemmy.blahaj.zone

I’d slap him. I don’t fucking care, I’m dying from societal neglect and welfare failings and like literally 0.00001% of his wealth could fix all my problems, you have to be inherently selfish to hoard all that wealth (not to mention be inherently evil to get it in the first place).

(this is a joke, I wouldn’t put it past Musk for suing for verbal assault or something)

45

"how bad is the kompromat on you? Were they teenagers or like much younger?"

44
lemmy.world

"What happened to your concern about climate change?"

Followed by

"You've completely debased yourself by supporting the one guy who will destroy the planet. And for what? A slight to your ego because Biden gave you the cold shoulder once? You are a huge thin-skinned bitch and will be remembered as one"

40

Shortest answer is always money. The richest man got much richer and plans to get richer yet after this.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/money/economy/elon-musk-put-277-million-into-the-election-he-s-200-billion-richer-this-year/ar-AA1vTrEZ

Elon Musk’s net worth has climbed by more than $200 billion in 2024, a massive increase in the same year that the world’s richest person spent at least $277 million backing Donald Trump and other Republican candidates. 

The bulk of the increase, more than $170 billion, has come since Election Day.

27
cRazi_manreply
lemm.ee

You've completely debased yourself by supporting the one guy who will destroy the planet.

He's going to make millions and get disproportionate power in government that he never would have gotten otherwise.

14

He's also attached himself to a fickle narcissist with a long history of throwing people away like tissues when they become slightly inconvenient, even at the cost of long-term value.

Musk knows that if Trump ditches him, he loses a hundred billion + in stock paper value, pretty much immediately. That's a lot of leverage and a lot of reason to stay on his good side.

It'll be interesting to see how it plays out.

9

Oh, he knows about climate change. Even if he was ever on the side of fixing it, he's clearly trying to just save himself now.

2
lemm.ee

If my reaction the first time I saw a cybertruck IRL is any indication, I'd scream.

35

Just chat casually pretending to have never heard of him and keep striking nerves by talking about stuff like family and friends and casually talking about things he thinks he understands but correcting him about them.

2

Do you follow this Elon guy on Twitter? He says the stupidest shit.

23

I know we're not supposed to invite violence. So this is pure satire ;-)

huh, I guess that your pericardium isn't stab proof. Who would have thunk?

6

"It's obvious you're just mad that your daughter is trans and that Grimes left you, everyone can tell"

21

I'd just leave myself. Words mean nothing to fascists; I'd be wasting my breath and sitting at his table.

17

I would literally pretend I had absolutely no clue who he was or any familiarity with any of his "achievements" or why they're "important". It would be pretty funny to see him try to respond to that.

15
madcaesarreply
lemmy.world

More like, you're the guy dancing on stage with that orange pedo

11
lemm.ee

Elon is friends with Gillaines Maxwell, himself

10

Hes desperate for attention, hed love you to talk to him.

Probably not so much once the awkward questions started, though.

4

"Can I have a dollar?"

If he says yes, and give me a dollar, I'd wait for him to put his wallet away and then ask,

"Can I have another dollar?"

And then do this on repeat until he stops.

11

Move my seat behind him and flick paper footballs at the back of his head.

11

Remember when most people who had heard of you liked you? Wouldn’t a genius be able to keep that good image?

11
lemmy.world

The only question I'd have for someone like him is.

"Do you think even the worst person can change...? That everybody can be a good person, if they just try?" And then I'd try my hand at fighting him after I got through the Sans Undertale speech.

10
lemmy.world

Lean over and whisper in his ear, "everyone hates you."

Something that would just..utterly fuck his brain for a while. If there was something that would motivate him into an Ebenezer scrooge character arc, I'd be so down.

If I had stealth techniques available to me, i would consider it.

10

"At least Pvt Manning traded her mental health for doing something heroic. You went crazy for whst? Financial gain and more kids to hate you?"

2

Elon, if you developed a really ferocious strain of ass-cancer, do you think it would affect your entire body?

9

I keep a Ka-Bar on my desk at all times, it doent take that long to bleed out when the artery in the kneck in severed.

9

Nah, just got a lot of knives. Mostly use the Ka-bar for opening cat food and food packaging, because I have destroyed so many shitty folding knives. Also I use it for opening bottles.

As for the artery thing I was going to make a choke about Musk having a weirdly thick neck but I forgot it and just kinda left the comment.

3
lemmy.world

"Trump surrounds himself with Yes Men who constantly just kiss his ass.... Is that why you two get along so well?"

Or on a more realistic note I'd ask him about climate change and try to understand what twisted logic he's using to justify his actions.

8

"Bet you can't end world hunger"

"Excuse me?"

"So, Bezos was right?"

"Now listen here you little shit.."

7

"How many billions is enough?"

I'm guessing the answer would be something like "It's never enough."

7

"One day a man invited him into a richly furnished house, saying 'be careful not to spit on the floor.' Diogenes, who needed to spit, spat in his face, exclaiming that it was the only dirty place he could find where spitting was permitted."

6

Excuse me, but you look familiar. Where do I know you from? Elon Musk? Do you sell perfume? X.com? Is that a porn site?

6

Can I ask the question with my ass? I would rip the loudest, wettest, stankiest fart and then blame it on him.

5
thelemmy.club

I’d ask him how his values were so easily changed by a comedian and his roving troupe of rude boys.

5

Impossible. I’d never put myself in a situation where it’s possible to sit next to this asshole.

5

You already know. You don't even have to ask. You know exactly what any one of us on this site would do to Elon Musk or Donald Trump behind closed doors, and you know without even thinking about it for a second.

...whatever it may be.

3

You wanna buy some art as a tax writeoff?

takes out sharpie and writes ,000,000 at the end of a $10 price tag.

3
sh.itjust.works

He’s got too much of a savior complex for that to work. His view would be that any good for himself is by definition good for everyone on net.

I’m reminded of that Sam Altman quote “Elon desperately wants the world to be saved. But only if he can be the one to save it."

9

Fully ignoring his existence, I'd lean over to whomever is on my other side and ask to switch seats. No other questions.

1

Do you actually care about Trump, or do you want to ensure Tesla has no competition

1

Hey bro here is my bank account details. You know I only need a few million bucks.

0

Pretty rude to sit down next to someone who is already seated and then tell them to leave, don't you think? lol

Edit: Phew, lots of weird fantasizing going on in this thread, lol

-1

I think the exceptional circumstances permit it.

5
feddit.uk

Is this site full of 12 year olds or what the fuck is this comment section? You guys are absolutely ridiculous.

-9
lemmy.world

what did you expect? Well-adjusted people begging for moneyman's attention and recognition? That's disgusting. Get real.

8