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118 replies

lemmy.world

My wife and I had our son via IVF. We wanted every single one of our fertilized eggs to work, but they didn’t. We had one that did and we suffered every time one didn’t.

Fuck Alabama for adding on to the torment and emotional suffering families going through IVF and any kind of infertility suffer already. It’s just adding unspeakable cruelty again.

148
essteeyoureply
lemmy.world

I've seen my sister going through this process for years. It's emotionally challenging, financially challenging, and risky to her health. She's had two ectopic pregnancies and had to be operated on twice. If she manages to have one baby she'll be happy, and there's no way it would make sense to implant all the other embryos given the health risk to her. So what would Alabama have her do?

I'm glad she doesn't live there.

44
lemmy.world

Alabama would have probably let her die with one of the ectopic pregnancies tbh.

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Jojoreply
lemm.ee

I have heard someone say in all seriousness that it's still murder to abort an ectopic pregnancy (which would just kill the mom and 'child' if allowed to continue)...

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KairuBytereply
lemmy.dbzer0.com

“But god can save her! If it’s part of his plan they will survive!”

/s if it wasn’t obvious.

23

I mean the odds aren't very different for the kid after the procedure. Why can't God save them after? Not even /s, why don't they ever have an answer for that? If we're relying on a miracle anyway, why would an infinitely powerful god need such constrained circumstances to make it work?

13

Murdering a woman to save a fucking zygote that will never become a human anyway. I'm starting to genuinely hate these people.

3

Friends of ours were going through something similar - they finally have a viable pregnancy, but it took many tries and failures. Fortunately we live in a state that isn't controlled by religious nut jobs.

1

It takes a massive massive amount of time energy and resources, financial and others, to adopt. Its awful.

16

Some places don't allow same sex couples to adopt. Laws around adoption might be weaker, too.

15

Based on your post history, you'll just delete your comment within a few hours anyway, but have you considered that if adoption was such a perfect solution then more people would adopt?

Instead of simply imagining simple solutions to complex problems, maybe try having a bit of empathy and see where that takes you?

Good luck.

5

It feels like you're suggesting that adoption is a panacea, but for a majority of couples, it simply isn't. I agree it could be considered selfish, but selfishness is a virtue in our society so I am asserting that it should be expected and accounted for, rather than simply waving your hand at its inherent issues and pretending they'll go away.

Adoption has been proposed and has failed as a satisfactory solution to this problem for millenia, what has changed about it to make it relevant now?

3

I haven't looked into it personally, but from every account I've heard, it sounds like a horror show. Admittedly, there's probably some confirmation bias in there, but I'm also thinking about it from an anthropological perspective.

If adopting a child were equivalent to giving birth to your own child, why would people still go through the torture that is pregnancy? We know that there have been orphanages for centuries, so this seems to be a long running thread in the history of humanity.

From a behavioral economics standpoint, it seems presumptuous to suggest that more couples ought to change their preference from what they're predisposed to choose naturally, especially without an explanation for why they are likely to have this preference to begin with.

Once you start speculating on the reasons why people prefer adoption only as a fallback option, you'll likely find that the answer is complicated and personal to every couple, but in aggregate the average couple isn't thinking about adoption as a plan A.

Even when it comes to same sex couples - they're working on technology to be able to combine dna from two same sex parents and create an embryo that is truly a child of two people of the same sex.

Not that there's anything wrong with that, I'm just thinking of examples where adoption seems to run counter to people's revealed preferences.

-1
lemmy.world

Then they should count as dependents, grant the parents tax breaks, be eligible for social benefits, receive child support payments, be counted as passengers when in mom driving in HOV lanes, etc.

103
Sippy Cupreply
lemmy.world

Holy shit storing embryos frozen and counting them as dependants would be an actual life hack

63

That's why I freeze dried mine and keep them in the glove compartment for use in the HOV lane.

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sh.itjust.works

11k to 15k starting cost plus 400 to 600 a year.

So when talking about thousands of dollars of tax credit it might have a good ROI. The initial cost could probably be lower if the actual quality doesn't matter to you.

3

I was under the impression the yearly fee was much higher, but maybe I was co flaring it with the cycle cost of IVF which can reach 30k.

2
lemmy.one

I love how the chief justice cites his god as his legal argument. What a sham. The god of the Bible has, thus far, failed to prove its legitimacy in any context, especially regarding a secular legal system.

99

Nevermind forcing his god onto the rest of the population. If these yoyos get far enough, they'll start sending non believers to "reeducation camps."

33
erwanreply
lemmy.ml

I would think his reference to god would be a sufficient argument to nullify his decision? As you said the US justice system is secular.

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Secular in theory, but lots of key elements have been taken over by religious nutjobs, so in practice it often isn't.

7

I don't even care how retarded his logic is, it's inherently not allowed because we're supposed to have church state separation. That is the worst part to me.

4

I heard this somewhere: “You’re in an IVF clinic. It’s on fire and you enter a burning room. On a table is a large cooler with 5 thousand fertilized eggs, and there’s also a crying, injured five-year-old girl in the room. Which one do you save? You can only save one.” The answer for most people is obviously the 5 year old and it’s not a hard choice.

76
reddthat.com

Every woman with a frozen embryo.

Get those child tax credits.

Don't have frozen embryos? Freeze some

Get those child tax credits

75

That is not legal. They have made embryos children when looking for people to put in jail, and not children when looking to give out benefits. Very convenient for the state budget!

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lemmy.world

In a concurring opinion, Chief Justice Tom Parker cited his religious beliefs and quoted the Bible to support the stance.

"Human life cannot be wrongfully destroyed without incurring the wrath of a holy God, who views the destruction of His image as an affront to Himself," Parker wrote. "Even before birth, all human beings bear the image of God, and their lives cannot be destroyed without effacing his glory."

wtf

68
SeaJreply
lemm.ee

Ironic that he quoted the Bible since the Bible is okay with abortion.

27
EatATacoreply
lemm.ee

The Bible doesn't really say anything about abortion. The most convincing thing I've seen is that it values the life of a mother over that a fetus, but it doesn't say abortion is okay. Unless I'm missing something.

Not that it matters what this book says, I just don't think it helps at all to misrepresent it.

-5
feddit.ch

Numbers 5:11-22

If your wife is unfaithful, she should go to the priest and get a concoction to abort the pregnancy conceived with another man.

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zarp86reply
sh.itjust.works

20 But if you have gone astray while married to your husband and you have made yourself impure by having sexual relations with a man other than your husband”— 21 here the priest is to put the woman under this curse—“may the Lord cause you to become a curse[b] among your people when he makes your womb miscarry and your abdomen swell. 22 May this water that brings a curse enter your body so that your abdomen swells or your womb miscarries.”

It doesn't imply that at all? Please feel free to let me know what this passage is really about.

21

The punishment section of the Hebrew version suggests many interpretations where words are euphemisms for things related to abortions. Her thigh might refer to her sexual organs, the curse an abortificent, etc. I think those meanings still exist in other translations.

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lemmy.world

It always strikes me as interesting that if the Bible truly was divinely inspired that there really should only be one translation and one interpretation. It should be incredibly clear and concise to everyone.

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EatATacoreply
lemm.ee

At least the other poster offered up what is effectively a completely made up verse.

-1
prolereply
sh.itjust.works

"effectively made up verse" LOL

Ah ok, so are you the arbiter of which stories in the Bible are literal, and which aren't? Because that story seemed very fucking literal.

Anyway, this can't be the first time you've encountered a contradiction in the text of your holy book (assuming you've even read it), so I'm sure you've already got some pretty effective ways of ignoring the cognitive dissonance inherent in your worldview... So go ahead and have fun with that I guess.

1

this can’t be the first time you’ve encountered a contradiction in the text of your holy book

lol. I'm not a Christian. You're just exposing your lack of critical thinking by thinking that, because I don't agree with you, I must be the exact opposite. My child, the world is not black and white.

You're projecting your struggle with cognitive dissonance onto me, make no mistake about it.

1
otpreply
sh.itjust.works

Does Alabama not do the whole "separation of church and state" thing? Lol

21

No the religious zealots here do not. School coaches require prayer before practices and games, same sex couples get banned from prom, kids at school get tricked into going to fun after school events that turn out to actually be evangelism stunts. A lot of applications to educational programs, gymnastics programs, and jobs ask about "leadership" which is code for experience as a church deacon or active evangelist.

16

The USA has never done seperation of church and state.

If we did, half the govt would be arrested for extremism and most churches would be terrorist organizations.

4

Just shit on this person. What a fucking hick. Just straight up pull your pants down and shit on him.

1
lemmy.blahaj.zone

In the Alabama case, a hospital patient wandered through an unlocked door, removed frozen, preserved embryos from subzero storage and, suffering an ice burn, dropped the embryos, destroying them. Affected IVF patients filed wrongful-death lawsuits against the IVF clinic under the state's Wrongful Death of a Minor Act. The case was initially dismissed in a lower court, which ruled the embryos did not meet the definition of a child. But the Alabama Supreme Court ruled that "it applies to all children, born and unborn, without limitation." In a concurring opinion, Chief Justice Tom Parker cited his religious beliefs and quoted the Bible to support the stance.

absolutely wild case

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lemmy.world

Why the fuck is he allowed to quote the Bible to support his stance.

Ffs America

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anamereply
lemmy.one

Thus every unfertilized menstruation is a death

Every fap is a murder of millions

41

Women of America. Get a freezer. Freeze your eggs and transport them home. On all future taxes claim them as dependents in perpetuity. Fuck these asshats. Game the system and make bank!

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rambarooreply
lemmy.world

Muslims don't believe that life starts at conception. So no, on this topic they are not as idiotic as Christians.

4
rambarooreply
lemmy.world

Turkey and Kazakhstan. And this is just racist bs. Not all Muslims hate Jews or have regressive views. Not to mention this is all off topic, it's Christians who are trying to destroy women's rights in America not Muslims

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rambarooreply
lemmy.world

Turkey isn't much worse than countries like Hungary or Poland when it comes to democracy. And Kazakhstan is in the middle of democratic reform

Also I like how you ignored the rest of my comment. But not surprised

Edit: and people were shitting on Christianity because Christians have huge amounts of power in the US. Far more than Muslims do in any western country. It's Christians trying to destroy secular rights in the West. You brought up Muslims for no reason other than to deflect

3
lemmy.world

We had I think six eggs harvested and fertilized, of those I think two made it to blastocyst, meaning the cells doubled as they should by day five. The four that didn't double correctly were discarded. Did we commit 4 murders? Or does it not count if the embryo doesn't make it to blastocyst? We did genetic testing on the two that were fertilized, one is normal and the other came back with all manner of horrible deformities. We implanted the healthy one, and discarded the genetically abnormal one. I assume that was another murder. Should we have just stored it indefinitely? We would never use it, can't destroy it, so what do? What happens after we die?

I know the answer is probably it wasn't god's will for us to have kids, all IVF is evil, blah blah blah. It really freaks me out sometimes how much of the country is living in the 1600s.

44

Whether you committed murder or not is directly correlated to the amount of money you have and whether you are in the in-group.

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lemmy.world

Even before this I would get really pissed when people casually said "It will happen when the time is right. God has a plan, though it isn't one we understand." In Alabama I was recently at the dentist, getting my teeth cleaned to the tune of religious music, hearing the hygienist say this bullshit to me.

2

Alabama? More like Talibana, a’ight? Being ruled by religious extremists - in the 21st (ce) century - blows my mind. Are people still that backwards? Apparently, yes. Nothing wrong with a bit of private faith in the sky man if it helps you in life… but to be a fundamentalist is unforgivable.

28

Tune in for the next episode of Conservative Politics! [Red state] says menstruating kills potential children? Find out next week!

28

Right, so pregnant or nursing once you’re menstruating! Otherwise you’re an illegal woman, not fulfilling your biblical purpose. Got it. This will be fun.

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lemmy.ml

Does this mean I can claim my sperm as a dependent on my taxes?

26
dvoraqsreply
lemmy.world

Oh god. I know people that do this already and call it "target practice".

1

Just wait until everyone on the state gets IVF treatments but never implants them, dozens of dependants claimed on their tax forms for free!

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marth_21reply
lemmy.dbzer0.com

Wait, if I move there, as a man, can I claim millions of dependents? I mean they're just unborn, they count right?

9

What about all of someone's future unborn grandchildren and great grandchildren and great great grandchildren? Public policy now requires fortune telling to see what deductions one is eligible for based on future events?

2

Monkey paw. "You're absolutely right, these eggs need to be implanted into women right away. Oh look right here, we have a whole prison population of slaves"

4
lemmy.world

Why the fuck should we ever have to ask a judge this? Hey judge why don't you tell us how we cure cancer? Judge, judge, what is dark matter? Please, you are the ultimate authority on all things!

18

Well get used to it because the US Supreme Court is about to (probably) do away with Chevron deference.

2
nymwitreply
lemm.ee

It's stupid but the article says why:

In the Alabama case, a hospital patient wandered through an unlocked door, removed frozen, preserved embryos from subzero storage and, suffering an ice burn, dropped the embryos, destroying them. Affected IVF patients filed wrongful-death lawsuits against the IVF clinic under the state's Wrongful Death of a Minor Act. The case was initially dismissed in a lower court, which ruled the embryos did not meet the definition of a child. But the Alabama Supreme Court ruled that "it applies to all children, born and unborn, without limitation." In a concurring opinion, Chief Justice Tom Parker cited his religious beliefs and quoted the Bible to support the stance.

1
Daft_ishreply
lemmy.world

I know why the courts would ask but in general this is something a single judge has no authority on. The idea that a single person gets to define what "life" is absurdity. We have army's of scholars following strict rules of logic, ethics, and are backed by science. Their consensus is more compatible with human society than some dusty book.

2
lemmy.world

Not sure exactly what companies store these frozen embryos, but if the company closes or you pass. How are the embryos disposed of?

Does the company need to keep them frozen and alive indefinitely? Or is it murder if they are terminated by the company? What happens if the freezers/cooler breaks? Who is responsible for the now classified murder?

18

The woman. It's always the woman in christian fundamentalism.

18

This is according to a friend who had it done:

If the treatment worked and there were embryos left over, they waited X amount of time, I think a year or so, and if they don’t hear anything from you then they are destroyed.

My friend said she got a reminder but didn’t want to think about it, that it was too hard, so she never responded and assumes they’re gone. She said that to her, she never told them to do it, and that helps her if she ever thinks about it. She ended up having twins.

6

Should be a gofundme paid for by the morons who support this nonsense. It would be excruciating expensive, too.

3

This is an infuriating aspect of this case. The courts could have held the clinic responsible for this loss without declaring that all frozen embryos are children by invoking the "prime mover" concept. Other courts have used it in, for example, surrogacy cases. In short, that concept holds that it's the intent of the parent(s) that matters, as the prime movers in the process of bringing a child into the world, not just the mixing of some genetic material. Those destroyed embryos could have become children, as it was the parents' intention to do so. And if nobody intends to implant embryos, for whatever reason, without the intent to make a child, they're merely organic material, neatly sidestepping those questions.

But, of course, the court wanted to impose its religious orthodoxy rather than issue a sensible ruling. Now we have those thorny questions.

1
lemmy.world

I recently read Neil Stephenson's book called "Fall", in which a significant chunk of the novel is set about 30 years in the future. At that point in time, large swathes of America are referred to as "Ameristan", because they are break-away territories ruled by evangelical warlords. It feels surprisingly prescient.

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lemmy.world

Neil Stephenson is a high effort author to read but the payoff more than makes up for it. I have yet to convince anyone else to read Snow Crash 😔

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lemmy.world

Even my dad couldn't convince me to read snowcrash😅 but maybe I'll find it as an ebook

2

It took me like 4 attempts and 100 pages before I was able to get into it but it dramatically changed my understanding of reality

2

I think about the Ameristan stuff and people being "facebooked" all the time since reading that book. In the time since I read it I feel like we just keep getting closer and closer to that reality.

2

More like the author read the writing on the wall for the past 50 years.

1
feddit.nl

A group of Alabama residents decide to rob a bank. They put on their ski masks, grab their guns, run in, yell for everyone to get down and they start looking for the vault. They ransack every office, but all they find are some fancy coolers. Tired from the search and hot from wearing ski masks in Alabama, they open one of them up to find a bunch of cool refreshing yogurt. They drink it, cool off a bit, and then they go looking for the manager. They find this nice looking guy in a suit and tie:

"Hey, are you the manager of this bank?", they yell, pointing a gun at his face.

"Yes sir, I am", the guy is shaking and scared, but tries to keep calm.

"Take us to your vault, right fucking now!"

"Vault? Sir this is a sperm bank"

8

The biggest surprise to me is that Alabama has a Supreme Court.

7