It is great to be introspective and want to identify any potentially toxic traits we may have. In this instance, you wrote that you loved them. You told them exactly how you felt about them. If you were intentionally acting a certain way only to act completely differently later on, that would be a different story.

It's difficult when it's people who live near you and work with you. You seem to be on the right path with saving up to move somewhere else. Negative people only take away from what little energy we should be directing towards ourselves. When you do leave they'll realize they have nothing else and nobody else to blame but their own selves

Funky socks are one of life's simple pleasures

Looking forward to it!

Grateful for your edit (on seeing a doctor). Feel free to keep us updated on how your sessions go, or to just post here whenever you want to talk. We are all in this cruel yet mysterious world together, getting through it day by day. Please keep letting yourself be surprised by tomorrow.

It must have been very difficult for you to open up like this, thank you for courageously sharing. This space is created by all of us. In some form or another, we all have been drawn toward this community for a reason. Also a reminder that we are not defined by our job. It's hard to hear how getting laid off has been affecting you, but please be kind to yourself and know that that job was not meant to be your permanent place. As much as therapy can be helpful, the difficult part truly is getting through the painful feelings day by day. Being able to vent like this is important and hopefully you'll be encouraging others to share their feelings as well.

Looking forward to this!

I appreciate you :)

Thank you for rebirthing this community, looking forward to the journey!