J.H. Kellogg also claimed to be a straight man who wasn't interested in consummating his marriage and felt no need for sex, and that the industrial-strength pressure washer enemas that blasted his prostate with gallons of water every single day were for medicinal purposes.

When inside thoughts become outside words

The initial Android Jellybean version of the blobmojis are the only emojis that have ever been good, before or since

People who make decisions like this don't know what a sitemap is. They probably think CNET is an app.

His brother was more responsible for the corn flakes, John Harvey thought they were too flavorful.

He doesn't give a fuck about meter, either. Now that's commitment.

Joe Kelly gets suspended for 8 games every time this is posted

We do know that Archer is probably from Utica, or at least not from Albany, given that he's never seen using the phrase "steamed hams" to refer to hamburgers.

In John Harvey Kellogg's case, it was even worse. Much like the guy who invented graham crackers, it was "So drunkenness leads to cirrhosis, gluttony leads to obesity, pre-condom promiscuity leads to syphilis, sports lead to injuries, and laziness leads to being a soft couch potato. Clearly this means that pleasure is actually bad and you should make sure you don't eat anything that tastes good, don't drink, don't lift weights, never have sex except to produce one or two children, don't play sports, don't listen to music, don't have fun, don't enjoy anything"

Loading screen art for GTA Ohio

Don't forget the "sandwich" made by squishing a shitload of butter and chips between two pieces of bread with no seasoning

The image picker now uses the fancy new Photo Picker

The fancy new photo picker is a significant downgrade. It can't search file names, it doesn't work with microSD cards, and it's painfully slow. Can we get an option to select images with an external gallery app?

The old image picker was so much better that there's no legitimate comparison, because the old one allowed you to use your gallery app, which is my case is Simple Gallery Pro from F-Droid because it's the best one there is. I just went from being able to search my microSD card by filename to having some kind of web 3.0 abomination that just shows every picture on local storage in a feed, and an album pane with a whopping 3 albums from local storage. Massive, massive step back. Potentially a deal breaker.

“It's not the train that's expensive. It's the plane that's not expensive enough,” the CEO of SNCF Jean-Pierre Farandou said in 2021.

i.e. no, train ticket prices aren't going down

No, you can't. Don't bother locking the doors tonight, I'm coming in anyway.

These 10 episode seasons are killing me, who's responsible for us not getting 24 episodes?

Crack = freebasing cocaine = base.
Bay Area rapper Lil B used to be insulted by people who called him "based", essentially meaning crackhead. He reappropriated it to mean outspokenly being yourself while actively disregarding what anybody else thinks, and started also going by Based God. That's it.

I do the same thing in reverse, I live in Zee territory but I always pronounced the ZX Spectrum as Zed-Ex

You can also just dissolve a shitload of styrofoam plates and cups in a 1:1 mixture of rubbing alcohol and gasoline, if you don't live near a gas station with a kerosene pump. You can start very wet wood that way, but I wouldn't use it to cook.

Today, a Lemming did not learn what a thesis statement is.